Barbara Rainey's Blog, page 19

The Newborn Babe Is Our Savior

 

In most tragedies you’ll find a story about a savior.

During mass shootings there are people who protect others with their bodies, or people who try to overpower the shooter, and always people who step in to stop the bleeding and keep injured victims alive. After tornadoes someone always steps up to rescue the trapped, to hold someone’s hand, to pray. Often unnamed, these men and women are doing what Jesus did and still does for us: provide saving help.

The greater tragedy today is too many of us, even many who claim to know Jesus, are unaware that we are bleeding and broken, in need of Jesus’ daily saving grace and mercy and power. We try to cover our inadequacies, our failures, our gaping wounds with performance, power, and addictions of all kinds instead of going first to our Savior. By His amazing grace and love He chose instead to come to us first.

Those in the Old Testament who believed knew God was their Savior, for He told them plainly, “I, I am the LORD, and besides me there is no savior” (Isaiah 43:11).

But on a cold dark night this name, Savior, was given to a real in the flesh baby lying unnoticed in a feeding trough.

Stunned shepherds heard a startling nighttime birth announcement delivered by an angel who stood before them surrounded by light as bright as the sun:

“Fear not, for behold, I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Savior, who is Christ the Lord.”

The delivery was unlike any birth announcement we get in the mail declaring name, date and weight, yet the angelic announcement did reveal the baby’s name: Savior. These Jewish men and boys—whose lives were rough, dirty and lonely —were told a name they understood to mean Messiah, the long awaited and promised rescuer of their people

What kind of Savior did the shepherds need? What kind of Savior do you need need?

Consider that the very first people who lived on earth were also the first ones to need a Savior.

Adam and Eve chose their own way over God’s way and became forever trapped in bondage to a body that would die instead of living forever. You and I are their children, alive in bodies that are broken by sin and utterly unable to reach God’s standard of holiness.

But because God loves us He sent Jesus to be our Savior!

Celebrate your salvation today and may your joy be great on Christmas Day!

This is the second of a five-part series. Click here to read yesterday’s post, “The Newborn Babe Is the Lion of Judah.”

The post The Newborn Babe Is Our Savior appeared first on Ever Thine Home.

The Newborn Babe Is the Lion of Judah

Have you ever seen a lion at the circus or in a zoo? They appear docile and obedient. The trainers and keepers can feel brave with the familiarity of proximity to these great animals. But in a split second, the lion’s ear-piercing roar reminds everyone who is really in charge.

The king of the jungle is fast and brave. He quietly stalks his prey, waiting for the right moment to pounce and attack. His powerful, angry roar announces that he is a beast to be feared and no one is safe in the lion’s presence, in his territory.

But what if a lion was on your side? Could there be safety beneath those powerful paws?

This is Jesus, the Lion of Judah.

The first mention in the Bible of this lion who will rule is in Genesis 49:9-10, when Jacob speaks his dying blessing to each of his twelve sons. To Judah he says, “Judah is a lion’s cub … The scepter shall not depart from Judah … ”

A scepter is a rod often made of gold and encrusted with jewels, which a king extends toward anyone seeking his favor or blessing. It is a symbol of kingship, a symbol of his authority over every person in his realm. Jacob predicts Judah’s coming royalty.

But Jacob’s words to Judah were not for him alone. After he spoke of the scepter, Jacob hinted about a future descendant: “ … nor the ruler’s staff from between his feet, until tribute comes to him; and to him shall be the obedience of the peoples.” One day a son many generations future will receive the tribute of nations and the obedience of all people. It was a prediction both of David’s reign and the greater kingdom of Christ.

Leaving Genesis and skipping to Revelation, the Lion of Judah appears in John’s vision of the end times. Peering into heaven John sees a sealed scroll in the right hand of God, but no one can answer the angel’s call to open it. John begins to weep because no one was worthy.  Then one of the elders spoke, “Weep no more; behold, the Lion of the tribe of Judah the Root of David, has conquered so that He can open the scroll and its seven seals” (Revelation 5:5).

Jesus, the Lion of Judah, the majestic powerful fearless one, has conquered sin and death. Therefore He is qualified. He alone is worthy. As Jesus steps forward to take the scroll and open it, He appears as a Lamb (Revelation 5:6-7). All in heaven fall prostrate before Him.

With great power, influence, and authority, Jesus acts on behalf of His children. He is fierce and frightening, fighting against the devil’s schemes. He lies low in the grass, waiting to ambush our enemy, His prey, and rescue us at just the right time.

What comfort we find in knowing the swift, patient, and proud Lion of Judah, the king of the world, is ferocious for us. As the famous hymn proclaims,

“Lead on O King eternal,

till sin’s fierce war shall cease,

and holiness shall whisper

the sweet amen of peace.

For not with swords’ loud clashing,

or roll of stirring drums,

with deeds of love and mercy,

the heavenly kingdom comes.”

May you and yours welcome this Lion of Judah to your home this Christmas week.

And may you worship Him for all He has done for you.

The post The Newborn Babe Is the Lion of Judah appeared first on Ever Thine Home.

The Newborn Babe is the Lion of Judah

Have you ever seen a lion at the circus or in a zoo? They appear docile and obedient. The trainers and keepers can feel brave with the familiarity of proximity to these great animals. But in a split second, the lion’s ear-piercing roar reminds everyone who is really in charge.

The king of the jungle is fast and brave. He quietly stalks his prey, waiting for the right moment to pounce and attack. His powerful, angry roar announces that he is a beast to be feared and no one is safe in the lion’s presence, in his territory.

But what if a lion was on your side? Could there be safety beneath those powerful paws?

This is Jesus, the Lion of Judah.

The first mention in the Bible of this lion who will rule is in Genesis 49:9-10, when Jacob speaks his dying blessing to each of his twelve sons. To Judah he says, “Judah is a lion’s cub … The scepter shall not depart from Judah … ”

A scepter is a rod often made of gold and encrusted with jewels, which a king extends toward anyone seeking his favor or blessing. It is a symbol of kingship, a symbol of his authority over every person in his realm. Jacob predicts Judah’s coming royalty.

But Jacob’s words to Judah were not for him alone. After he spoke of the scepter, Jacob hinted about a future descendant: “ … nor the ruler’s staff from between his feet, until tribute comes to him; and to him shall be the obedience of the peoples.” One day a son many generations future will receive the tribute of nations and the obedience of all people. It was a prediction both of David’s reign and the greater kingdom of Christ.

Leaving Genesis and skipping to Revelation, the Lion of Judah appears in John’s vision of the end times. Peering into heaven John sees a sealed scroll in the right hand of God, but no one can answer the angel’s call to open it. John begins to weep because no one was worthy.  Then one of the elders spoke, “Weep no more; behold, the Lion of the tribe of Judah the Root of David, has conquered so that He can open the scroll and its seven seals” (Revelation 5:5).

Jesus, the Lion of Judah, the majestic powerful fearless one, has conquered sin and death. Therefore He is qualified. He alone is worthy. As Jesus steps forward to take the scroll and open it, He appears as a Lamb (Revelation 5:6-7). All in heaven fall prostrate before Him.

With great power, influence, and authority, Jesus acts on behalf of His children. He is fierce and frightening, fighting against the devil’s schemes. He lies low in the grass, waiting to ambush our enemy, His prey, and rescue us at just the right time.

What comfort we find in knowing the swift, patient, and proud Lion of Judah, the king of the world, is ferocious for us. As the famous hymn proclaims,

“Lead on O King eternal,

till sin’s fierce war shall cease,

and holiness shall whisper

the sweet amen of peace.

For not with swords’ loud clashing,

or roll of stirring drums,

with deeds of love and mercy,

the heavenly kingdom comes.”

May you and yours welcome this Lion of Judah to your home this Christmas week.

And may you worship Him for all He has done for you.

The post The Newborn Babe is the Lion of Judah appeared first on Ever Thine Home.

How to Remember Jesus on Christmas Morning: An Easy 10 Minute Idea

Have you been tempted to lose the celebration of Christ’s birth in a swirl of fairy tales and merchandising? Have you trivialized the stunning miracle of God becoming human with toys, tinsel, and shopping trips in a frenzy of preparation for Christmas morning?

You might have started strong with weekly Advent readings with your family, but the tradition and dedication faded as the to-do lists got longer and the days shorter. You are not alone.

We’ve all been there … We get so focused on spreading clean sheets on guest beds, or taping glittered paper edges just right to hide the gift, or getting those first pies in the oven, that we lose sight of the real Christmas.

You haven’t failed.

Here’s an easy, 10-minute idea for Christmas morning. You can still make Christmas memorable and about Jesus. 

Gather around the tree as usual. But before the kids tear into the carefully-taped paper, start with the most important gift. Designate a gift drop spot for Jesus.

Guide your family in first honoring Jesus for His willingness to come to earth. Remind them that He came to earth knowing His destiny was a cruel, brutal death. 

Read the story in Luke 2:1-21 or Matthew 2:1-12. Point out that those who first worshiped Christ came to Him in faith before He had accomplished anything on earth. It was not because of the miracles He was yet to perform, or any gifts He might give. They simply worshiped Him because He had come, as promised. He was the long-awaited Messiah.

God desires that, like the magi and shepherds, we bow before Him and surrender our hearts and our lives to Him. Explain to your family that Jesus wants us for Christmas!

Encourage everyone gathered this Christmas morning to again give their hearts to Jesus. Have strips of paper ready for anyone who’d like to write or draw a gift to Jesus. Allow time for them to drop the paper gift in Jesus’ spot.

Save all these letters, notes, and gifts to Jesus as a valuable record of the growing faith in the hearts of each family member. The toys and trinkets will fade but hearts given to Him grow in value to become as Peter said, “more precious than gold” (1 Peter 1:7).

We hope you and your family have a wonderful and memorable Christmas!

If you enjoyed this post by Barbara, check out some additional posts about the true purpose of Christmas:

“Advent” “The Incarnation”

 

 

The post How to Remember Jesus on Christmas Morning: An Easy 10 Minute Idea appeared first on Ever Thine Home.

Parenting Children With Visible and Invisible Limitations

 

Of our two sons, one was more athletic, while the other was more scholastically inclined. The younger one’s first word was, “ball.” The older one started reading before age five. They could not be more different.

Instead of playing basketball for hours on the court Dennis built for the boys (because that’s what he did in his childhood), Samuel found a tennis racket and began hitting balls against the brick wall underneath the basket. It became clear he’d found his sport.

We enrolled him in lessons and then in competitions. By early seventh grade he was ranked in the state and playing for number one status in his age division. In a tournament to determine new rankings, Samuel almost had his opponent beat, but missed one point and then on the next serve lost the match. He was disappointed, of course, but we hoped this was just the beginning. Parents dream big for their kids!

That day was indeed the beginning. But it was not the start of a dream tennis career.

A couple weeks later Samuel’s coach asked to speak to me when I picked him up after his lessons. He explained that Samuel wasn’t getting to balls he used to return with ease. “Something’s not right,” he said.

Immediately I lined up appointments for our son. The early diagnosis was unclear, so we went to Mayo Clinic, where neurologists confirmed Samuel had Charcot-Marie-Tooth, a slow deterioration of the nerves to the lower legs.

After returning home Samuel wanted to keep playing tennis and I agreed 100 percent. I designed a pair of tennis shoes with elastic support from ankle to toe to help him lift his feet so he could run and not fall as often. But six months later it was clear he would never run again.

 

 

 

I’ll never forget the grief and heartbreak. Dennis and I went for a walk the day the truth finally became clear to me. Five minutes into the walk I sat on a log, fell forward into a fetal position, and cried uncontrollably, with groans from a place so deep within I never knew it existed.

Learning to adjust

For the next six months or longer Dennis and I mourned. Our athletic son had lost his greatest strength. He never liked school and now it was worse. In his own grief he struggled even more in class. As our most active kid he started getting in trouble.

We knew he was mourning, but what 13-year-old knows how to process catastrophic loss? We didn’t know how to help him either. It’s impossible to prepare for something like this. So, we leaned on God, prayed constantly, asked for wisdom, made mistakes, talked to those wiser and more skilled, and trusted God to use this tragedy for good in ways impossible to see in the moment.

As the months moved slowly forward we wondered how Samuel would handle high school. Would he go to college? Would he ever get married? What kind of career could he have? Would he be confined to a wheelchair one day? And most of all we wondered what God was doing and what He had planned by giving our son a real incurable life-altering physical disability.

 

 

All parents have high hopes for their children. We want life to be easy for them. We want a pain-free existence as much as is possible. We desire all these things because our children are extensions of us. “Every child is a piece of his mother’s heart walking around outside her body,” said author Jean Fleming. And it is true. Even today when my children suffer or are in pain I feel it as if it was my own.

When Samuel was diagnosed Dennis and I both longed to give him our legs. Dennis even asked if there was a transplant surgery of some kind. We would have sacrificed happily because we love our son enough to give our lives for him.

Limitations are common to all

We don’t have just one child with a disability. Our oldest daughter is dyslexic. Our adopted daughter, though not diagnosed with a disability still had her own very real obstacles through no fault of her own. Our other three have no official diagnosis but are none-the-less limited by DNA deficiencies and by relation to Adam and Eve.

My brother’s son is autistic. Another nephew is on the spectrum. A dear friend’s son at 21 is living with ulcerative colitis which greatly limits his lifestyle as an otherwise healthy young man. My daughter Laura’s best friend has a son with Down syndrome. Another friend’s daughter has three children, all diagnosed with the rare condition PANS.

Even the most intelligent among us may be geniuses or near genius but lack ordinary common sense. Like one of Dennis’s professors at Dallas Theological Seminary who had a photographic memory but forgot that he had driven his car to a speaking engagement in Houston. Afterward, he left the hotel, taxied to the airport and flew home. When he arrived he phoned his wife to come get him and she asked what he did with the car! C.S. Lewis also had a photographic memory but struggled with spelling his whole life. Go figure.

But the whole truth is that all of us are born with multiple limitations. We have no idea how much we lost in terms of intelligence, our five senses, physical and emotional abilities when Adam and Eve “fell.” All of humanity is “disabled” in some way. As I learned from my sister-in-law disabilities are really diff-abilities; different abilities.

The most important point of this entire post is this: None of your children or grandchildren are without disabilities. All of them have limitations, and this is good. Recognizing our own flaws and helping our children recognize theirs is an important step to acknowledging our need for a savior.

The greatest tragedy of all is not being born with a disability but living without knowing one’s brokenness and need for the Savior, Jesus Christ.

A single mom wrote about all that her 16-year-old son was missing since his father had died, summarizing: “Such are the children of the kingdom of God—all are missing arms or limbs, all are cracked vessels. Out of such raw material God is pleased to build His kingdom, the better to show the power is from Him.” Paul taught that we are all jars of clay, formed from dirt. All by God’s good design.

Here are six ways to embrace and give thanks for the disabilities and weaknesses God has woven into your children for their good and His glory.

1. Pray that your children would know they are sinners in need of Jesus. This was one of my frequent prayers for my children. I was especially concerned for my oldest and my youngest who were both people pleasers. They didn’t rebel much or instigate sibling rivalry. I knew they could be deceived into thinking they were good on their own merit. And Satan would work to convince them of that.

Our sin nature is so quick to defend our own perceived goodness and to measure ourselves against others who appear to be inferior than we. That was my own story. My three brothers were always fighting and getting into trouble. To avoid my father’s displeasure and occasional anger I was the good girl and never did anything to rock the boat.

Though I was eager to receive Christ as a college student, it was not because I felt sinful. In my own view I was not really “wicked and depraved” as the Bible declared. It wasn’t until my 40s that I saw the depth of my own depravity and was convinced how desperately I needed Jesus’ sacrifice on the cross for my sins.

“None is righteous, no, not one; no one seeks for God. … no one does good, not even one,” Paul wrote in Romans 3:10-12. Believe it and pray your children believe it too.

2. Give thanks for every limitation and disability you discover and teach your children to do the same. God commands us to “give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you” (1 Thessalonians 5:18). Embrace God’s design. He knows what He’s doing and He has beautiful plans for your child’s life.

3. Beware of constantly telling your children they can do anything and be anything they want. This may surprise you because everyone today believes this, but it’s not wise or biblical parenting. The truth is your children can’t do or be anything they want. God has given them limitations on purpose to help guide them to His good and perfect plan and design.

An important part of your job as a parent is helping your children learn how to discern God’s directions for their lives. A favorite verse of mine is Ephesians 2:10, which says, “For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand …”

4. Teach them to look for His design for their lives, not to find their own way. God their Maker wants to use the talents, desires, and yes, the disabilities He has given in ways that He has planned. Teach them to work with God and how He has crafted them. Remind them, “Your hands have made and fashioned me” (Psalm 119:73). And pray they will not be lured by the culture into thinking they know better than God. Sadly, too many children and adults today strive in thousands of ways to be all they imagine, many with tragic results.

5. Teach your children and grandchildren that no one is perfect except Jesus. It’s another trap of our present culture to strive for perfection in our looks, our image, our identity, our jobs, our families, and more. The pressure is killing people. Literally. The sooner we acknowledge we are fallen and will never find perfection on our own, the sooner we will release the pressure and turn to Jesus. “There is salvation in no one else …” Peter declared in Acts 4:12.

6. Remember God delights to show His power and glory. John 9 tells an amazing story for our instruction. Jesus passed by a man born blind and the disciples asked whose fault it was, supposing there was a logical human explanation. But Jesus replied “It was not that this man sinned, or his parents, but that the works of God might be displayed in him” (John 9:3). Jesus then healed this man and all who saw glorified and worshipped Him.

So too in our lives God has plans and purposes that will reveal His miraculous power and care for us that we might glorify and worship Him.

God causes good

Through our own children and from watching others with disabilities, I’ve learned the pains and losses from these “gifts” that we would change or wish away are the very things God wants to use to purify, strengthen, and mold our kids into His image.

 

 

On the Wednesday before Thanksgiving 2015, Samuel and his family came early for some time with Dennis and me before we gathered with extended family the next day. He and his four kids and wife wanted to hike Pinnacle Mountain near our home; at 1,000 feet it’s small by western standards, but it is still a challenging hike, especially near the top. Samuel has surprised doctors over the years with his remaining ability. He wears titanium leg braces, has learned to play golf and is able to walk normal distances. On this day he wanted to climb Pinnacle.

 

 

With his well-used walking sticks he kept up on the lower part of the trail without too much difficulty. But as we climbed higher the ascent proved more difficult. I’ll never forget his oldest son, who was 12, choosing to position himself a couple steps behind and below his dad. Peterson was paying attention not to his own enjoyment but to his dad and his difficulty negotiating the trail.

Finally, we arrived at the boulder field, the last section before the summit, and Samuel knew he couldn’t finish. He sat on a rock and his youngest son joined him. He sent the rest of us to the top, enjoying the satisfaction that he’d made it as far as he did. He was grateful and didn’t focus on what he couldn’t do.

Samuel is a godly man, a great husband and father, and by training and occupation an outstanding marriage and family therapist. (I’m biased but I know it’s true. We hear reports.) He is also a speaker with his wife, Stephanie, at Weekend to Remember marriage getaways. There is no question in my mind and heart that God purposed his disability to form a man of great compassion, understanding, and wisdom.

I also believe his divine limitations spared him from temptations or difficulties far worse. We vastly underestimate the protection of God in circumstances that appear to hold us back.

Would a world of only perfect people be better?

In 2005 I read an article I’ve never forgotten by a mom of four; her youngest was born with multiple physical and mental disabilities. Writing with great wisdom, she was reflecting, even then, on the growing trend to terminate pregnancies determined to be Downs or other birth defects.

“What would a society look like if everyone were ‘normal,’ if we never had to make provisions and exceptions for people who are deaf, blind, mute or lame? I didn’t have to look farther than my own family. My children are among the most unselfish people I have ever known. All three have made sacrifices, too many and too big to count, for their disabled sibling. One would think this would have made them bitter and discontented. Amazingly it has done exactly the opposite. They are thankful, giving, and tolerant to difficult and unlovely people.

“Could people have that balancing effect on society as a whole? How would love and compassion develop among people who were only surrounded by the lovely and intelligent?

“I wonder if our advanced technologies successfully eliminate the weak and needy, will future scholars, theologians, politicians, and poets ponder: ‘Why has our society become less loving, so selfish, so intolerant, so uncommitted to anything outside of individual gain? Why are we so full of selfish ambition and vain conceit? Is this ‘perfect’ society a place where any of us would want to live?’”

Sadly I’m afraid we are living in that society today. We no longer believe the truth of the Bible which teaches in Psalm 139:13, “For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.”

God doesn’t forget, never sleeps, makes no mistakes. Many assume He doesn’t see or care because He doesn’t show up in the dramatic ways we want, but Acts 17:26-28 reminds us that He is control: “ … and He made … every nation of mankind to live on all the face of the earth, having determined their appointed times and the boundaries of their habitation, that they would seek God … for in Him we live and move and exist …”

Disabilities and limitations are not mistakes. They are gifts to help us see God, know Him as He is and to teach us to be compassionate and gracious to others. And knowing Him is worth the losses of today because one day, He will make “all things new” (Revelation 21:5).

 

 

And my son will run and jump and skip and dance and rejoice in His Maker!

And we will rejoice, too!

 

If you enjoyed this, be sure to read some other blog posts where Barbara wrote about trusting God despite disabilities:

 

“Hope After Unhappy Holidays” “Give Thanks by Praising”

 

 

The post Parenting Children With Visible and Invisible Limitations appeared first on Ever Thine Home.

Parenting Children With “Disabilities”

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Of our two sons, one was more athletic, while the other was more scholastically inclined. The younger one’s first word was, “ball.” The older one started reading before age five. They could not be more different.

Instead of playing basketball for hours on the court Dennis built for the boys (because that’s what he did in his childhood), Samuel found a tennis racket and began hitting balls against the brick wall underneath the basket. It became clear he’d found his sport.

We enrolled him in lessons and then in competitions. By early seventh grade he was ranked in the state and playing for number one status in his age division. In a tournament to determine new rankings, Samuel almost had his opponent beat, but missed one point and then on the next serve lost the match. He was disappointed, of course, but we hoped this was just the beginning. Parents dream big for their kids!

That day was indeed the beginning. But it was not the start of a dream tennis career.

A couple weeks later Samuel’s coach asked to speak to me when I picked him up after his lessons. He explained that Samuel wasn’t getting to balls he used to return with ease. “Something’s not right,” he said.

Immediately I lined up appointments for our son. The early diagnosis was unclear, so we went to Mayo Clinic, where neurologists confirmed Samuel had Charcot-Marie-Tooth, a slow deterioration of the nerves to the lower legs.

After returning home Samuel wanted to keep playing tennis and I agreed 100 percent. I designed a pair of tennis shoes with elastic support from ankle to toe to help him lift his feet so he could run and not fall as often. But six months later it was clear he would never run again.

 

 

 

I’ll never forget the grief and heartbreak. Dennis and I went for a walk the day the truth finally became clear to me. Five minutes into the walk I sat on a log, fell forward into a fetal position, and cried uncontrollably, with groans from a place so deep within I never knew it existed.

Learning to adjust

For the next six months or longer Dennis and I mourned. Our athletic son had lost his greatest strength. He never liked school and now it was worse. In his own grief he struggled even more in class. As our most active kid he started getting in trouble.

We knew he was mourning, but what 13-year-old knows how to process catastrophic loss? We didn’t know how to help him either. It’s impossible to prepare for something like this. So, we leaned on God, prayed constantly, asked for wisdom, made mistakes, talked to those wiser and more skilled, and trusted God to use this tragedy for good in ways impossible to see in the moment.

As the months moved slowly forward we wondered how Samuel would handle high school. Would he go to college? Would he ever get married? What kind of career could he have? Would he be confined to a wheelchair one day? And most of all we wondered what God was doing and what He had planned by giving our son a real incurable life-altering physical disability.

 

 

All parents have high hopes for their children. We want life to be easy for them. We want a pain-free existence as much as is possible. We desire all these things because our children are extensions of us. “Every child is a piece of his mother’s heart walking around outside her body,” said author Jean Fleming. And it is true. Even today when my children suffer or are in pain I feel it as if it was my own.

When Samuel was diagnosed Dennis and I both longed to give him our legs. Dennis even asked if there was a transplant surgery of some kind. We would have sacrificed happily because we love our son enough to give our lives for him.

Limitations are common to all

We don’t have just one child with a disability. Our oldest daughter is dyslexic. Our adopted daughter, though not diagnosed with a disability still had her own very real obstacles through no fault of her own. Our other three have no official diagnosis but are none-the-less limited by DNA deficiencies and by relation to Adam and Eve.

My brother’s son is autistic. Another nephew is on the spectrum. A dear friend’s son at 21 is living with ulcerative colitis which greatly limits his lifestyle as an otherwise healthy young man. My daughter Laura’s best friend has a son with Down syndrome. Another friend’s daughter has three children, all diagnosed with the rare condition PANS.

Even the most intelligent among us may be geniuses or near genius but lack ordinary common sense. Like one of Dennis’s professors at Dallas Theological Seminary who had a photographic memory but forgot that he had driven his car to a speaking engagement in Houston. Afterward, he left the hotel, taxied to the airport and flew home. When he arrived he phoned his wife to come get him and she asked what he did with the car! C.S. Lewis also had a photographic memory but struggled with spelling his whole life. Go figure.

But the whole truth is that all of us are born with multiple limitations. We have no idea how much we lost in terms of intelligence, our five senses, physical and emotional abilities when Adam and Eve “fell.” All of humanity is “disabled” in some way. As I learned from my sister-in-law disabilities are really diff-abilities; different abilities.

The most important point of this entire post is this: None of your children or grandchildren are without disabilities. All of them have limitations, and this is good. Recognizing our own flaws and helping our children recognize theirs is an important step to acknowledging our need for a savior.

The greatest tragedy of all is not being born with a disability but living without knowing one’s brokenness and need for the Savior, Jesus Christ.

A single mom wrote about all that her 16-year-old son was missing since his father had died, summarizing: “Such are the children of the kingdom of God—all are missing arms or limbs, all are cracked vessels. Out of such raw material God is pleased to build His kingdom, the better to show the power is from Him.” Paul taught that we are all jars of clay, formed from dirt. All by God’s good design.

Here are six ways to embrace and give thanks for the disabilities and weaknesses God has woven into your children for their good and His glory.

1. Pray that your children would know they are sinners in need of Jesus. This was one of my frequent prayers for my children. I was especially concerned for my oldest and my youngest who were both people pleasers. They didn’t rebel much or instigate sibling rivalry. I knew they could be deceived into thinking they were good on their own merit. And Satan would work to convince them of that.

Our sin nature is so quick to defend our own perceived goodness and to measure ourselves against others who appear to be inferior than we. That was my own story. My three brothers were always fighting and getting into trouble. To avoid my father’s displeasure and occasional anger I was the good girl and never did anything to rock the boat.

Though I was eager to receive Christ as a college student, it was not because I felt sinful. In my own view I was not really “wicked and depraved” as the Bible declared. It wasn’t until my 40s that I saw the depth of my own depravity and was convinced how desperately I needed Jesus’ sacrifice on the cross for my sins.

“None is righteous, no, not one; no one seeks for God. … no one does good, not even one,” Paul wrote in Romans 3:10-12. Believe it and pray your children believe it too.

2. Give thanks for every limitation and disability you discover and teach your children to do the same. God commands us to “give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you” (1 Thessalonians 5:18). Embrace God’s design. He knows what He’s doing and He has beautiful plans for your child’s life.

3. Beware of constantly telling your children they can do anything and be anything they want. This may surprise you because everyone today believes this, but it’s not wise or biblical parenting. The truth is your children can’t do or be anything they want. God has given them limitations on purpose to help guide them to His good and perfect plan and design.

An important part of your job as a parent is helping your children learn how to discern God’s directions for their lives. A favorite verse of mine is Ephesians 2:10, which says, “For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand …”

4. Teach them to look for His design for their lives, not to find their own way. God their Maker wants to use the talents, desires, and yes, the disabilities He has given in ways that He has planned. Teach them to work with God and how He has crafted them. Remind them, “Your hands have made and fashioned me” (Psalm 119:73). And pray they will not be lured by the culture into thinking they know better than God. Sadly, too many children and adults today strive in thousands of ways to be all they imagine, many with tragic results.

5. Teach your children and grandchildren that no one is perfect except Jesus. It’s another trap of our present culture to strive for perfection in our looks, our image, our identity, our jobs, our families, and more. The pressure is killing people. Literally. The sooner we acknowledge we are fallen and will never find perfection on our own, the sooner we will release the pressure and turn to Jesus. “There is salvation in no one else …” Peter declared in Acts 4:12.

6. Remember God delights to show His power and glory. John 9 tells an amazing story for our instruction. Jesus passed by a man born blind and the disciples asked whose fault it was, supposing there was a logical human explanation. But Jesus replied “It was not that this man sinned, or his parents, but that the works of God might be displayed in him” (John 9:3). Jesus then healed this man and all who saw glorified and worshipped Him.

So too in our lives God has plans and purposes that will reveal His miraculous power and care for us that we might glorify and worship Him.

God causes good

Through our own children and from watching others with disabilities, I’ve learned the pains and losses from these “gifts” that we would change or wish away are the very things God wants to use to purify, strengthen, and mold our kids into His image.

 

 

On the Wednesday before Thanksgiving 2015, Samuel and his family came early for some time with Dennis and me before we gathered with extended family the next day. He and his four kids and wife wanted to hike Pinnacle Mountain near our home; at 1,000 feet it’s small by western standards, but it is still a challenging hike, especially near the top. Samuel has surprised doctors over the years with his remaining ability. He wears titanium leg braces, has learned to play golf and is able to walk normal distances. On this day he wanted to climb Pinnacle.

 

 

With his well-used walking sticks he kept up on the lower part of the trail without too much difficulty. But as we climbed higher the ascent proved more difficult. I’ll never forget his oldest son, who was 12, choosing to position himself a couple steps behind and below his dad. Peterson was paying attention not to his own enjoyment but to his dad and his difficulty negotiating the trail.

Finally, we arrived at the boulder field, the last section before the summit, and Samuel knew he couldn’t finish. He sat on a rock and his youngest son joined him. He sent the rest of us to the top, enjoying the satisfaction that he’d made it as far as he did. He was grateful and didn’t focus on what he couldn’t do.

Samuel is a godly man, a great husband and father, and by training and occupation an outstanding marriage and family therapist. (I’m biased but I know it’s true. We hear reports.) He is also a speaker with his wife, Stephanie, at Weekend to Remember marriage getaways. There is no question in my mind and heart that God purposed his disability to form a man of great compassion, understanding, and wisdom.

I also believe his divine limitations spared him from temptations or difficulties far worse. We vastly underestimate the protection of God in circumstances that appear to hold us back.

Would a world of only perfect people be better?

In 2005 I read an article I’ve never forgotten by a mom of four; her youngest was born with multiple physical and mental disabilities. Writing with great wisdom, she was reflecting, even then, on the growing trend to terminate pregnancies determined to be Downs or other birth defects.

“What would a society look like if everyone were ‘normal,’ if we never had to make provisions and exceptions for people who are deaf, blind, mute or lame? I didn’t have to look farther than my own family. My children are among the most unselfish people I have ever known. All three have made sacrifices, too many and too big to count, for their disabled sibling. One would think this would have made them bitter and discontented. Amazingly it has done exactly the opposite. They are thankful, giving, and tolerant to difficult and unlovely people.

“Could people have that balancing effect on society as a whole? How would love and compassion develop among people who were only surrounded by the lovely and intelligent?

“I wonder if our advanced technologies successfully eliminate the weak and needy, will future scholars, theologians, politicians, and poets ponder: ‘Why has our society become less loving, so selfish, so intolerant, so uncommitted to anything outside of individual gain? Why are we so full of selfish ambition and vain conceit? Is this ‘perfect’ society a place where any of us would want to live?’”

Sadly I’m afraid we are living in that society today. We no longer believe the truth of the Bible which teaches in Psalm 139:13, “For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.”

God doesn’t forget, never sleeps, makes no mistakes. Many assume He doesn’t see or care because He doesn’t show up in the dramatic ways we want, but Acts 17:26-28 reminds us that He is control: “ … and He made … every nation of mankind to live on all the face of the earth, having determined their appointed times and the boundaries of their habitation, that they would seek God … for in Him we live and move and exist …”

Disabilities and limitations are not mistakes. They are gifts to help us see God, know Him as He is and to teach us to be compassionate and gracious to others. And knowing Him is worth the losses of today because one day, He will make “all things new” (Revelation 21:5).

 

 

And my son will run and jump and skip and dance and rejoice in His Maker!

And we will rejoice, too!

 

If you enjoyed this, be sure to read some other blog posts where Barbara wrote about trusting God despite disabilities:

 

“Hope After Unhappy Holidays” “Give Thanks by Praising”

 

 

The post Parenting Children With “Disabilities” appeared first on Ever Thine Home.

Did Advent Sneak Up on You?

 

 

Advent began yesterday, the first of four Sundays leading to Christmas. If you are like me, it always sneaks up and leaves me feeling behind from the start.

Maybe it’s because I like to savor Thanksgiving and our once-a-year gathering with extended family that makes me reluctant to move on to Christmas before the Thanksgiving weekend is even over.

I suppose I’m in a tiny minority of those who didn’t do all their Christmas decorating over the Thanksgiving weekend … I just can’t. It’s too much too soon for me. And it obscures my focus on gratitude, which is crucially important.

But Advent reminds us of a much different kind of anticipation for Christmas than the commercialized, consumer-focus of our world. It began last Sunday and it’s okay if you, like me, missed it.

 

 

Looking forward to Santa is emphatically not the central theme of Christmas; instead it’s  longing for and anticipating the coming of Christ. For many multiplied centuries God’s people waited and hoped for the Messiah who was promised. Praying for His coming; O Come, O Come, Emmanuel.

Anticipation is not just for children, but is a crucial element of grown-up, mature faith.  For what is faith if it is not expectation? Believing that God will fulfill His promises without seeing that fulfillment is its essence.

 

 

We so easily forget how long God’s people waited for His first coming. For thousands of years God gave clues through a steady stream of messages delivered by His prophets hinting at the time and place where Jesus would come. He was preparing the way.

But then there was a 400-year pregnant pause of silence until “the fullness of time had come” (Galatians 4:4).

 

 

 

As I wrote in the opening stanza of the book, What God Wants for Christmas, this long wait had become a very dark period of time:

 

Twas the week before Christmas

But nobody knew.

No stockings, no ornaments,

No gifts or good news.

All the world had lost hope

All the people felt fear.

Now listen, I’ll tell you

Why Christmas came near.

 

When Emmanuel came He was so much more than anyone anticipated. Far more than an earthly king who would deliver them from the tyranny they had endured for centuries, Jesus came to deliver them and us from our bondage to sin. Even better, He came to be with us forever, the meaning of the name Emmanuel.

He is not a God who is wandering the galaxies, but He is here, still on earth, living within all who have welcomed Him into the home of their hearts.

Marking the Sundays of Advent is a way we can practice this same patience. I love to tell moms, “It’s better to do even one lesson than never start and therefore do none.”

Like stringing pearls on a cord one by one, God linked beautiful hints of His gift to come one by one for His people to cling to in hope. Some of those pearls of recognition were the names of the promised Messiah in each stanza of the wonderful hymn, “O Come, O Come Emmanuel”:

 

O Come, Thou Rod of Jesse …

O Come, Thou Dayspring …

O Come, Thou Key of David …

O Come, Adonai, Lord of might …

 

Watching and waiting for this coming One, the Man of many names, grew patience in His people. And God is doing the same in His people today … growing our patience as we wait for His second Advent. Like the people of the Old Testament who waited for thousands of years we have now waited two thousand years since Jesus ascended to heaven declaring He will return in the same way.

 

 

Jesus told us to have faith like a child. At Christmas we can become a child again as we allow anticipation to grow in our faith. As we wait for the day of His birth, remembering that He will come again. Our faith also grows as we continue to believe Him even though we continue to wait and long for His promised return.

Do you know Him?

Will you welcome Him, the miracle of Christmas?

Will you sing “O Come, O Come, Emmanuel” as a prayer from your heart?

Grow anticipation in your faith as you continue to wait on His coming and use an Advent devotion to help you and your family practice trusting Him this Christmas season.

Come quickly, Lord Jesus!

 

If you enjoyed this, check out some other Christmas posts by Barbara:

 

“A Christmas Rescue” “Unhappy Holidays: How to Find Specks of Light in the Darkness of Winter” “Be Present”

 

Also, be sure to download Barbara Rainey’s new eBook, Why We Need Gratitude Now More Than Ever!

 

 

 

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Giving Thanks Means Speaking Thanks

 

 

Only three days remain before the day which annually reminds us to express gratitude.

Have you ever thought it’s not just an attitude of gratitude that’s important?

What are you doing to make sure you and yours find ways to actually verbalize thanks to God for all He has given us?

“Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights,” declared James the brother of Jesus, who then adds, “with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change” (James 1:17). That means God never changes. Period. So all good gifts in your life come directly from the hand of God who is ever the same in His goodness toward you.

Giving thanks to an unchanging God is what I need in this ever-changing world.  

Here is a common scenario that helped me understand the importance of putting my gratitude into real words and speaking them out loud to God in prayer or in thanksgiving around our table every year.

Imagine sending a wedding gift to an engaged couple who live in another state and never getting a thank you note. I’ve experienced this and I wondered if the gift got lost in the mail or if the bride was too busy, too self-focused or maybe she hated what I sent. I’m sure there was a good reason she forgot to send a thank you for the gift I spent time and money buying to celebrate their happy day. Or maybe the new bride had an attitude of gratitude. Perhaps she thought that was enough. I didn’t give the gift so I’d get a note in the mail, yet there is some expectation that a gift should be acknowledged, right?

Because we know God is perfect and possesses all the big “omni” attributes—like omniscient, omnipresent, etc.—we overlook the fact that He is a Person of emotion. He feels love, sadness, anger, and more just as we do, or rather we experience those emotions because we are made like Him, in His image.

But the point in only having an attitude of gratitude is that our lack of verbalizing our thanksgiving might feel to God like neglecting to send a thank you note for the kindness of a gift. Except the neglect needs to be multiplied by six billion people who don’t say thank you for much at all relative to what we’ve been given. Point taken?

On Thanksgiving I want to reflect the words of Revelation 7:12, which says, “Amen! Praise and glory and wisdom and thanks and honor and power and strength be to our God forever and ever. Amen!” Let’s express gratitude by verbally thanking God for everything you can think of.

Will you join me in making a list of ways you can thank God? Strive to do this every day. Every month. All year long!

And to help you and all you gather with this week actually put this into practice, go to our ETSY store and download one of our Thanksgiving gratitude cards. Print them on your home printer and invite all who will share your table to put into words their gratitude. You still have time!

Be courageous and try it. Yes, there may be some discomfort doing this with your family, but it’s good for us and God more than deserves our words of thanksgiving on this annual holiday.

 

Be sure to download Barbara Rainey’s new eBook, Why We Need Gratitude Now More Than Ever!

 

The post Giving Thanks Means Speaking Thanks appeared first on Ever Thine Home.

Friends & Family Fridays #11

 

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

I’m sending this month’s letter a week early because Thanksgiving is next week and I’ll be with family. And I’m so excited that we will have four of our six kids and their families coming to be with us! Only two weeks ago we thought we’d have none, so “hooray for me”! I’ll send photos in early December and you can watch for some on Instagram and Facebook.

My days have been exceptionally full since last month’s letter, with little signature touches of God’s presence sprinkled throughout, glimpses that are almost easy to miss. I’m reading again a devotion book I love called The Valley of Vision and a line I read last week illustrated this perfectly: “May I never confine my spiritual walk to extraordinary occasions, but acknowledge Thee in all my ways.”

It is easy for me to think God has gone silent on ordinary days full of laundry, errands, and other mundane work, but He is always working. And I’m learning if I pay attention I’ll see evidences of His orchestrating, providing, guiding, and revealing Himself to me. I’m working on paying attention.

Here’s a quick bullet list update of my life since last month:

The three weeks since my brother went Home have been a flurry of decisions, texts, phone calls, and work, much of it good in many ways. Because of his declining health, upkeep on the farm was neglected and that has taken my focus since I live nearest. His memorial service was Sunday the 14th.

 

 

 

The trial I mentioned back in June is still ongoing. We are more resolved to our position of being unable to fix it, and more at peace with waiting to see what God is doing. But it continues to pop up, reminding us that spiritual battle is real. Last week was one of those reminders. We are praying God will deliver and make clear His way forward.I finished our second eBook, titled Why We Need Gratitude Now More Than Ever. It was emailed to all of you but of course we had issues with the mailing and links. Are we surprised our enemy didn’t want a book on being thankful to our God to reach all of you and be shared widely? No, we are not. Here is a link to the free download if you missed it.

We still need to hire someone to become the managing director for Ever Thine Home. A couple of you have inquired but I’ve been so busy with other things this process has slowed substantially. Again I’m learning to rest in God’s timing.

With all of this I’m still a seminary student—a descriptor I’m not yet used to! One of those glimpses of God’s providence is the pace of class work slowed during the weeks after my brother’s death. Now I’m beginning work on my end of class paper which is due Dec 16.

I want to give you a quick taste of what I’ve already learned from the assigned passage in Ephesians that is the focus of this paper. Chapter two and verse 19 begin with these words: “So then you are no longer strangers and aliens …”

Last week those words “strangers and aliens” caught my attention as words that were repeated often throughout the entire Old Testament. I did a word search and looked up the meaning in my Blue-Letter Bible app and observed many interesting facts and details:

Though the word “strangers” is not used in Genesis 3 in God’s pronouncement of discipline on Adam and Eve, their rebellion and despising of God’s way made them strangers to Him and resulted in their expulsion from the Garden. Adam and Eve were exiled from God’s holiness because of their sin. He had chosen them, created them for a relationship, but they rejected Him and became strangers to His ways.In Genesis God chose Abraham to begin a line of people who would be His own, through whom He intended to bless the nations of the earth. But they too were infected with Adam’s disease and God sent them to Egypt to be strangers in that land (Genesis 15:13).But God loves the strangers and aliens Many times in the Old Testament He says, “You shall not wrong a stranger or oppress him,” or, “nor shall you gather the fallen fruit of your vineyard; you shall leave them for the needy and for the stranger,” and, “The stranger who resides with you shall be to yu as the native among you, and you shall love him as yourself” (Exodus 22:21, Leviticus 19:10, Leviticus 19:34, NASB).In the Psalms stranger s are often those who are enemies of God and His people.In the books of the prophets they are the foreigners who will occupy the houses and cities of Israel when God sends them into exile.In the New Testament Jesus added a surprising twist to the concept which I imagine shocked the disciples when He said, “For I was hungry and you gave Me something to eat; I was thirsty, and you gave me something to drink; I was a stranger and you invited me in” (Matthew 25:35, NASB). God a stranger ? Yes, in this world He was.Jesus also uses the term when teaching the parable we all know about the sheep who hear His voice, saying, “A stranger they simply will not follow, because they do not know the voice of strangers” (John 10:5, NASB).

Paul then writes his letter to the Ephesians, who were young believers in Jesus as Messiah, summarizing the historical understanding of this word and concept for both Gentiles and Jews. “Remember that you were … separate from Christ, excluded from the commonwealth of Israel, and strangers to the covenant of promise, having no hope and without God in the world,” (Ephesians 2:12, NASB).

Everyone who does not believe in Jesus–those who are still rebelling, dismissing, refusing His offer of salvation—are strangers and aliens. They are all outside the family of God.

“So then,” Paul concludes this chapter of the letter, “you are no longer strangers and aliens, but you are fellow citizens with the saints, and are of God’s household …” And I want to add lots of exclamation marks and emojis of praise hands and celebratory symbols.

What a wonder that I have been chosen to belong to God’s household, and even more to be called His daughter.

This story is the essence of all we celebrate when we give thanks on Thanksgiving Day.

This is the story wrapped up in the Babe in the manger.

This is the story we exult in at Easter.

One day we will fall on our faces before Him when we see Him face to face. And He will lift us up and smile and say, “Welcome Home, my child.”

May you and yours make the effort at your Thanksgiving celebration to focus on genuine heartfelt gratitude to God for choosing you and all who know Him.

Hugs to all of you,

Barbara

 

Click here to download my new eBook, Why We Need Gratitude Now More Than Ever

 

The post Friends & Family Fridays #11 appeared first on Ever Thine Home.

Why Gathering for Thanksgiving Matters … and Always Will

 

 

Our youngest child was just a toddler. Our oldest was double digits but not yet a teen. We were spending Thanksgiving as we had the previous six years at a conference we hosted for singles in Colorado called the Keystone Kaper.

 

 

While the event was always amazing ministry and fun for our kids to learn to ski, it was not ideal family time. My husband was in charge—speaking, greeting attendees and other speakers—and generally pre-occupied by his job. While I understood and supported his work, my heart was longing for a way to begin to build memories and traditions for our family.

In our rented condo that year, I read a few stories to our children about the spiritual history of our country. After I finished I asked all six to write or color what they wanted to thank God for in their lives.

Our toddler told me what she was thankful for, I wrote her words, and she scribbled on the notebook paper. It was a short, simple little devotion time, and though I didn’t know it then it was the beginning of a 30-plus-year tradition for our family.

 

 

 

A new era of holiday decisions

Last year was the first in decades that we missed our favorite family tradition. Did you  too? Thanksgiving celebrations for almost everyone were upended in 2020.

One year later we are still finding our footing on shifting sand. Like any trauma survivor who evaluates life with new eyes, many of us are re-evaluating why we do what we do. Most churches, for example, have not yet recovered their pre-2020 attendance—members are still reluctant to gather in large groups, families have become accustomed to watching online in pajamas, while others have decided church attendance just isn’t important in their lives anymore.

Family holiday gatherings are being questioned, too. Some family members remain anxious about crowds, but for others the break last year opened the door to new ideas or options.

Americans are fiercely independent. We are also addicted to comfort and to the pleasures of ease. So this year traveling “over the river and through the woods to grandmother’s house” has lost its nostalgic magnetism. It has lost its obligation. And for some this year, Thanksgiving just isn’t as important as it once was.

While new possibilities can be good, I’m concerned we might lose the invisible benefits of gathering, especially with family.

Our family has experienced these invisible benefits over the years. After we concluded our season of hosting singles conferences, we were free to travel on Thanksgiving to my mother’s farm where the rest of our family had started gathering several years before. Now, 30-plus years later, I see the importance of those yearly connections, specifically Dennis’s and my personal attachment to my nephews and nieces. And though our kids only saw their cousins once a year, those annual investments of time built lasting relationships. Bonfires, four-wheeler rides, jokes, and always chocolate chip cookies turned into teenage conversations in the kitchen with Uncle Dennis after Grandma and Grandpa went to bed.

In 2019 Dennis led the four newly married cousins in our rendition of the newlywed game. Nearly 40 of us crammed in the living room of the 100-year-old farm house laughed hilariously for two hours, including my mother who had just turned 94! None of us will ever forget it.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I would have never imagined then how attached I’d feel to these now 20- and 30-something nieces and nephews today with only a once-a-year opportunity to be together. I love them like my own kids.

 

Who thought up families anyway?

God created families. It was his idea in Genesis. And He imagined both biological, spiritual, and families formed by adoption as God made clear through Paul when he wrote, “In love He predestined us for adoption to Himself as sons through Jesus Christ” (Ephesians 1:5). We are related to our families of origin by blood and bonding. And we are related by the blood of Christ to brothers and sisters in the faith.

God is our Father. He bought us with the blood of His Son and it matters to Him that His children gather together in His name. This theme is woven throughout the Bible like a red ribbon through a garland of green. Gathering is not insignificant to God, for He tells us plainly, “For where two or three are gathering in My name, there am I among them” (Matthew 18:20).

 

Five reasons gathering with family matters at Thanksgiving

God established annual feasts and ceremonies. He instituted these occasions for His people to keep them connected to Himself and each other. He knew then and now that all humans are “prone to wander” so He built annual gatherings into the rhythm of life. And He declared them mandatory in Exodus 23:14: “Three times in the year you shall keep a feast to Me.”

Our annual holidays (Thanksgiving, Christmas, and Easter), which are all rooted in deep spiritual significance, keep us connected to God and one another. Though our holidays are not instituted by God, Christmas and Easter have been commemorated annually since the third century after Christ, and Thanksgiving is about gratitude which is profoundly Biblical.

 

Repetition is healthy. We need the repetition of familiar routines even when life changes as it has these last two years. The daily, weekly, and annual habits of our lives become a liturgy of worship … what we give ourselves to declares what we value.

Humans need annual habits, holidays which pull us out of the ordinary … out of that which drains life to that which gives life. Gathering with family is never perfect, but it matters. And repetition begets traditions. Annual holidays, a contraction for the original holy days, become traditions.

 

Gathering together creates opportunities for bonding. Sharing fun, conversations, activities, and cooperating in cooking meals all create memories to be treasured. Memories feed our souls, renew and ground us. Traditions work like glue to keep nuclear and extended families connected. And yes, traditions include the foods we eat, the activities we share, the places we gather because they are part of those repeated habits which give life to our values.

God’s annual gatherings of His people included certain foods, locations and ceremonies and three of the seven required a pilgrimage to Jerusalem. And attendance was mandatory. God knew if given the choice His children would find more fun things to do with their holiday time.

 

We will always need annual occasions to focus on God. Period. The Psalms remind us over and over that God’s people always tend to forget Him: “They forgot His works and the wonders that He had shown them … But they soon forgot His works; they did not wait for His counsel … They forget God, their Savior” (Psalm 78:11; 106:13, 21). Thanksgiving gives us a regular opportunity to remember God and to vocally and collectively thank Him. It is good for our faith. Being connected is necessary to our rootedness, our sense of unity and belonging. Without family, whether biological or adopted by Christ or by parents, we become isolated, alone, bereft of relevance in this world. Our church family and our family of origin provide what no one else can. Both are essential to our well-being. Many of the ills in our present-day world are a result of isolation, lostness, rootlessness, and the terror of having no answer to the question, “Does anyone care if I’m not here?”

 

Memories live long in families

Over the years at the farm we’ve had lots of laughs as we remembered times … like the year we arrived, late as usual, and after all eight of us spilled out of the packed SUV my dad announced, “I always thought it was the in-law kids who were late, now I see it’s my own kids who are always tardy!”

Or the year Dennis, ever the tease, sent our nephews, ages 8-11, out on a “snipe hunt.” If you don’t know how to hunt snipes, it’s an old technique for teasing boys and getting a good laugh when they come home empty-handed. All you need is a banana for bait and a paper sack.

 

 

We all remember my nieces as teenagers sitting at the kitchen table till midnight, ready to hit online Black Friday sales and then showing us their bargains the next morning. And we all remember my mom, Gramma, sitting up way past her bedtime in her chair in the kitchen, sleepy but with a case of FOMO before it became a thing. (FOMO means fear of missing out!). Until her 90s she sat in her corner chair listening to the banter and the laughter, saying little but clearly loving watching everyone … together … enjoying the moments.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Nothing means more to a parent.

Nothing means more to God our Father than to see His kids gather.

 

 

I hope you will gather with some biological or spiritual family members this year. Change is inevitable and necessary. Traditions cannot remain the same forever. But some traditions must never change. Gathering to give thanks, to celebrate the birth of Christ, and to celebrate the Resurrection of Christ must remain.

 

If you enjoyed this, read some additional posts by Barbara on the same topic:

 

“Time to Gather” “Come, Ye Thankful People, Come”

 

The post Why Gathering for Thanksgiving Matters … and Always Will appeared first on Ever Thine Home.