Yvette Bodden's Blog, page 10

Serie Empoderamiento: Actriz, Escritora, Comediante y Actriz Puertorriqueña-Dominicana. La Autora de “Legitimate Kid”, Aida Rodríguez Comparte Su Verdad con AW

Todos hemos escuchado los cuentos sobre las costumbres Latina. Generalmente nuestros padres suelen tener prácticas sobreprotectoras. Cumpliendo sus mandamientos, es la mejor manera de mantener la calma en casa. Crecí en un hogar relativamente estricto, pero a medida que crecimos, nuestra mamá y nuestro papá aflojaron las riendas. A pesar de la flexibilidad de las reglas, algunas cosas nunca cambiaron.

Uno de los dichos favoritos de mi madre era “Lo que pasa en la casa, se queda en casa”. Es decir, que todo lo que hable o ocurra en el hogar, se queda en privado. Valoraba la verdad y esperaba honestidad de todos, aunque si compartirla resultaba doloroso. Sin embargo, eso no significaba que tuviéramos permiso para hablar de nuestros asuntos fuera de la casa.

Aída Rodríguez ¡Ha roto cada una de las reglas de mi mamá! “No tiene pelo en la lengua”, como diría, mi Mami. Me enamoré de su contenido porque es autentico y relativo. Yo la conoci por primera vez cuando la entreviste en mi serie de Latinas valiente en el 2021 para su especial de television con HBO Max “Fighting Words”. Recuerdo salir de su camerino sintiéndome realmente vista. Cualquiera que la conozca le dirá que es una de las auténticas.

Ella tiene un nuevo libro sobre su historia, llamado “Legitimate Kid,” que promete brindarte todos los sentimientos. Es una colección de escrituras sobre los altibajos de su vida. Ella comparte el viaje con sus lectores ¡Desde reveses personales hasta el éxito y todo lo demás! Su libro ha sido descrito como “entrañable, impactante y en última instancia, reconfortante”.

AW se sentó con Aida para tener una conversación sincera, genuina y sin filtros. Las cosas se volvieron reales cuando hablamos sobre la costumbres de cada una, el trauma generacional, nuestras madres, el colorismo y más. Me siento orgullosa de compartir esta entrevista con ustedes. Esperamos que le ayuda a romper las cadenas emocionales que le impiden vivir una vida de grandeza.

Dices tu verdad sin pedir disculpas, lo cual es difícil para la mayoría de las personas. Lo compartes en las redes sociales, en entrevistas y en tus sketches cómicos. Nunca te he visto rehuir una respuesta honesta. ¿Eso alguna vez te ha metido en problemas? No, aunque con este libro pienso en cómo afectará a mi madre. La adoro, ella lo es todo para mí pero también tengo derecho a mi propia historia. Creo que muchas veces cuando nos dicen, “Lo que pasa en la casa, queda en casa” era para proteger otras personas pero nos impactaron los errores cometidos.

Siempre fui una persona privada hasta “Fighting Words” cuando compartí el viaje de conocer a mi padre y escribir este libro. Seguí pensando en mi “Yo” más joven, solían llamarme “Pequeña Aidita”. Este soy yo apareciendo ante esa nina y los demás, sean niños, niñas o no binarios. Hay muchos de ellos que están experimentando las mismas cosas que yo. Quiero apoyarlos y curar un poco de Aidita. Estoy seguro de que a mi papá no le entusiasma la historia de cómo lo golpearon, pero quería compartir la historia del colorismo. Es un cuento muy profundo y que sufrÍ mientras crecía.

Fui muy gentil en este libro porque había mucho más que podría haberse compartido sobre el abuso y la violación sexual. No incluí nada de eso en el libro. Se salvaron muchas historias, el foco es la legitimidad. Quería que la historia fuera fluida y se mantuviera en línea con mi tesis.

Usted ha escrito esta escrito, “Legitimate Kid”. ¿Puedes contarnos de qué se trata y por qué le pusiste este título? La historia del libro comenzó a los 8 años cuando estaba en 3er grado. Una chica me llamó bastardo porque no tenía el apellido de mi padre. Inmediatamente, pude sentir la vergüenza porque los otros niños se reían de mí. Esto me puso en la misión de explorar y descubrir por qué los insultos. Saber lo que pasó a la edad de 12 años me rompió. He estado tratando de recomponerme desde entonces.

Creo que mucha gente está luchando con la legitimidad y validación. Podría tratarse del apellido de tu padre, de que seas el más oscuro en tu familia, seas inmigrante, tengas acento o estés en transición, lo que sea que te haga cuestionar tu validez. La gente te dice que no eres legítimo – no suficiente. Quería explorar esto dentro de mí, por qué me sentía menos o indigno de grandes cosas. Necesitaba volver a esa herida específica y comprender de dónde venían esos sentimientos. Era importante contar esta historia y ayudar a otros a sentirse vistos. Hágales saber que no están solos y validación no viene de fuera, viene de dentro.

Este libro y tu comedia cuentan muchas de tus verdades. Yo escribí un memoria que fue publicada en 2019. Entiendo lo difícil que es compartir nuestra verdad con el mundo. ¿Cuál fue la verdad más difícil de compartir? Si soy honesta, la parte más difícil del libro es compartir cosas sobre mi madre sin demonizarla. Mi madre era una niña cuando me tuvo. Me criaron para respetarla y admirarla. Tuve que encontrar el equilibrio entre poder decir “Esto estuvo mal y no está bien” y al mismo tiempo, permitirle humanidad y realidad. No quiero que nadie la ataque o hable negativamente de ella. Lucharé por ella hasta el final. Ella es la reina de mi mundo.

Mi madre y mi abuela nacieron en medio de un trauma. Se trataba de comprender que ella cometía errores, pero yo también. Mientras yo la señalaba con el dedo, mis hijos tomaban notas de mis errores. Entonces, escribir sobre ella fue lo más difícil porque la amo mucho.

Los Latinos, particularmente los Dominicanos aprenden desde pequeños que cualquier cosa que suceda en el hogar o dentro de la familia no debe compartir con extraños. ¡Fuiste y escribiste un libro sobre tu historia! ¿Ha recibido reacciones negativas o rechazo de algún miembro de la familia? No, dije mi verdad. Esta es mi versión de la historia contada desde mi percepción. Nunca me propuse demonizar a nadie, pero hay personas en este libro que me hicieron cosas horribles y no hay forma de darle vueltas. No hay justificación para empujar a una mujer fuera de un coche en marcha o abusar de alguien. Todos cometemos errores pero debemos ser responsables de lo que hacemos. No me preocupa en absoluto el rechazo.

Vi una entrevista en la que compartiste que perdiste a dos personas muy importantes en tu vida. Tu tío, quien te crió y a tu abuela, fallecieron en dos meses de diferencia. Casi al mismo tiempo recibibes una llamada de The Last Comic Standing, una gran oportunidad! Había que salir y hacer reír a una audiencia mientras estaba de duelo. Fue una de las cosas más difíciles que haya tenido que hacer en su vida. Pero creo que su abuela y tio estuvieron con usted para impulsarla a lograrlo. Este fue el momento en que todo cambió para ti. En esa misma entrevista, dijiste: “Cuanto más contamos nuestras historias, más poder tenemos”. Estás compartiendo tu historia con el mundo. ¿Qué crees que dirían tu tío y tu abuela sobre el  libro? Mi abuela era muy regia. Ella era una de las personas con más clase que he conocido, muy elegante y de buenos modales. Ella decía “No se habla de esas cosas” pero de todos modos ella siempre fue la persona que me inspiró y me fortaleció. Entonces ella decía: “Eso no es para mí, pero si así es como vas a hacerlo, entonces adelante.”

Mi tío nunca tuvo a nadie que lo defendiera. Escribir sobre él fue como darle su lugar. Devolviéndolo a su trono. La sociedad le dijo que no era digno. Creo que lo agradecería. Ambos sabían cuánto los amaba. Todo lo que hago es para amar y ayudar a los demás, que fue lo que ellos hicieron. Creo que estarían de acuerdo con eso.

¿Qué espera que se lleven tus lectores? Quiero que la gente se libere de la vergüenza. La vergüenza es encadenamiento, son esposas que nos mantienen en un lugar y callados. Mantiene a las personas en un lugar que no nos permite elevarnos al nivel que pertenecemos. Estamos tan abrumados por la culpa y la vergüenza. Es relevante en nuestra comunidad de Latinos, Latiné y Latinx que emigraron de otros países. Me encantaría que la gente se encontrara en esta historia y se liberara. Vea cómo “Estoy bien. Lo logré. Estoy del otro lado, ellos también pueden hacerlo”. Mi sueño es que la gente se dé cuenta de que es legítima y pertenece. No importa tu apellido, el color o textura de tu piel y cabello, de dónde vienes, el idioma hablado o la migración. Usted pertenece aquí, lo merece y ha sido enviado aquí para hacer su trabajo. Eres valioso.

Nos gusta finalizar las entrevistas de AW con una cita, un mantra o un consejo para inspirar a la communidad. Para cualquiera que tenga miedo de compartir su verdad, ¿Puede ofrecer palabras de aliento? ¿Los que no se atreven ni piensan en utilizar su voz en sus propias vidas? Primero que nada, eres digno. A menudo, cuando sientes que no puedes contar tu historia, es porque sientes que nadie te escuchará, ni le interesa. Tu importas.

Hay algunos mantras que uso. “El Universo está de acuerdo con una decisión”. Una vez que tomas la decisión. Dios, el Universo, o cualquier cosa en la que creas, conspira contigo para que esto suceda.

“One can never consent to creep when one feels an impulse to soar.” – Hellen Keller. En Español, “Uno nunca puede consentir en arrastrarse cuando siente el impulso de volar.”

Hay un fuego dentro de ti, que puede conducirte a un propósito. Si eliges no ignorarlo y seguirlo, nunca sabrás lo que pueda pasar. No permitas que tú mismo ni nadie te haga sentir pequeño, ni siquiera tú mismo cuando te sientas pequeño. Si tienes impulso de volar, te animo a que vueles, mereces estar entre las águilas.

AW está increíblemente agradecida con Aida por compartir sus verdades con nosotros y el mundo. Sabía que al comenzar nuestra conversación, me iba a costar mucho no llorar. Me alegra informar que no hubo crisis, sino momentos de reflexión y valentia. Gracias Aidita por permitirte brillar y creer que podías volar. Todos tenemos un niño o una niña asustada dentro de nosotros. Espero que otros se vean a sí mismos en nuestras historias y desarrollen la confianza para crear la vida de sus sueños.

En las palabras de Aida, “Si tu percepción es siempre a través de una lente negativa, esa es una vida miserable”.

Supera tu dolor y vive tu verdad, seras mas fuerte por ello.

Para obtener más información sobre Aida o las fechas de la gira, visite graciosoaida.com. Los pedidos anticipados son importantes para los autores. Compre su Copia en su librería independiente o local para apoyar a las pequeñas empresas.

Escucha esto episodio de AW Confidential Podcast en Ingles en todos los medios de transmision de podcasts. Míralo en nuestro canal de AW Confidential YouTube para disfrutar de todos los chats paralelos durante la entrevista.

*Esta entrevista ha sido editada y condensada para mayor claridad.

Contenido protegido. 2023 awakened-woman.com

Empowerment Series: Dominican Comedian-Actress from Fuse’s Like, Share, Dimelo, “De Lo Mio” and “Righteous Thieves,” Sasha Merci Shares Roots with AW

Sasha Merci’s credits include the film De Lo Mio, a Fuse series called Share, Like, Dimelo, and El Teteo in Los Angeles, as well as, collaborations with Bumble, AT&T, Heineken, and many other brands.

She began her music career and then transitioned to an art form that would offer more freedom of expression and creative autonomy. Comedy. Did she imagine the amazing things that have unraveled in her career? The Dominican beauty, says that “A dream manifested when she was cast as Nadia for the Lionsgate film, “Righteous Thieves.”

AW had the opportunity to speak with Sasha. We discussed family, identity, and the use of the word Latino vs. Hispanic. The conversation took a personal turn when we talked about internal validation and personal loss. I was able to see myself in her story, and we connected on a human level.

The Bronx native is making an impact on and off the screen. She is using personal experience as a 2nd generation Dominican to help our community open dialogue on topics that have long been taboo. As a daughter of Dominican immigrants myself, and raised in New York, I related to a lot of what she shared with me.

Before we begin, I have to ask, did you buy that house, yet? Not yet but working on it. As I’ve said in previous interviews, my parents will not understand the success or what I am doing until I buy a home for them. The question is usually “What are you doing because you aren’t doing it for me.” My dad has always been a humble man. His talks usually start with “God willing,” words that have been crucial to me during my upbringing. I stay true to my authenticity, the Universe will do the rest.

In a past interview, you mentioned how complex we are, as human beings. I have Dominican roots and understand how difficult it is to be open and honest about experiences with family, love, sexuality, colorism, and the generational trauma we carry. How hard has it been to be so vocal and honest with your comedy? Have you received any pushback from family or the community? I’ve reserved myself a lot in the last couple of years. I’m not posting as much and finding a lot of growth over time. Instead of being on the defensive side of things, and trying to be the voice for everyone; I’ve had to ask myself, am I being authentic to people that are like me?

Sometimes, we respond out of outrage. But through growth, I realized, if I’m going to respond, as a Comedian, I want to be funny but also, real. I feel like things can change with humor and one can address the elephant in the room with laughter.

Your candidness is refreshing and empowering. We need more Sasha and Aida Rodriguez to help crack open all the taboos around these topics. In conversation with Karina from Hot 93.3, you discussed using the words Hispanic, Latina, Latino, and Latinx. I will throw in Latine´! I can’t deny that I get confused with so many different terms but I’m okay with Latina. When asked, how do you express your Latinidad? Why do you think these labels keep evolving? How important is it to you that we get it right? I think education, having everyone on the same page and learning about its meaning is important. Hispanic and Latino can be triggering to some people and not others. It’s about our different experiences, our relationship with the terminology, how someone grows up, and what it was like during their time. I understand the need to create a new word but we should want the term to represent all of us.

I recently learned, if you are Hispanic, you are Spanish-speaking from a country colonized by Spain.  When you are Latino, you are from a Latin country that was colonized by Latin European countries, such as France, Portugal, and Spain. It is not an easy conversation, people may listen to or read this interview, and not everyone will be on the same page.

I consider myself Latina and can refer to myself as Latinx or Latine´. I am not offended by any of it. Words are ever-changing, as we are continuously evolving. The only way to have real change is by expressing compassion and understanding for one another.

I love seeing Latinas rise. It is critical to see ourselves in the success of those forging a path to greatness. You are creating content that is relatable, authentic, and entertaining. You play the role of “Nadia” in the film, “Righteous Thieves.” Can you share a little about the role and what it means to you, as a child of Dominican immigrants, growing up in the Bronx, to be part of this production? This was always a dream! My reality starts with being 3 months old, taken to the Dominican Republic to live with my grandparents. I resided with all the comforts of a big home and hired help until the age of six. When I returned to the States, I had to adjust to living in a one-bedroom with my dad and six other people. I did not know the language and was bullied in school, like many others. But no matter how small my life felt, I knew I wanted more and better for myself.

I remember receiving the movie’s trailer before release and sending it to my brothers. They said, “I can’t believe it, you manifested this moment!” I want to thank Jolene for the opportunity, she truly made this happen. I look forward to seeing people invest in her to see how much more amazing things can be!

Nadia is a badass! I tapped into my high school girl, tough exterior. She is a locksmith by day and a safecracker by night. The woman is talented at what she does. She is consumed by the skill and uses it as a form of expression and freedom. When building my world for this character, I saw her as someone who loves a challenge. Nadia gets an exhilarating feeling from breaking into your secrets. There is power in knowing, “Whatever you’re trying to hide, I am going to find it!” Playing this character pushed me to find out what I’m into and figure out what makes me come alive, something I loved about this character.

What is next for Sasha? Hopefully, more movies, TV shows, and stand-up. El Teteo is still happening and is special to me. I have grown from it while seeing it come to fruition. I love to see people have a good time and put their “stuff” aside to enjoy the moment. Seeing the event evolve so much in Los Angeles is marvelous and telling, Dominicans are everywhere! We show up in rain, snow, and storms, as a true testament to our spirit and resilience. There are many layers that we need to grow from but if I didn’t come from a Dominican household or had a dad that went through what he did, I wouldn’t be where I am today. Although, I don’t agree with many of the cultural norms. I can only live the way, I want to present in the world and be an example for the newer generation.

AW likes to end interviews with a piece of advice, mantra, or quote to inspire. You are creating your dream while staying true to yourself. What advice can you share with anyone who may feel like they have to bargain their authenticity to realize a goal or dream? It is a tricky question but I will say, “Nothing is more important than our internal validation.” It’s difficult because everyone wants to be liked, and loved, and when you are in the world of entertainment, you want to be the center of attention.

You have to focus on internal validation because regardless of how much you do, everybody is a critic. You will try your best but people will make you feel like your best is not enough. Show up authentically. Live in your actual spirit because humans can feel your energy and know when you are being real, this is how you become relatable. When you fall in love with yourself, people will gravitate toward you.

AW extends its deepest appreciation to the dynamic Sasha Merci for sharing so much of herself with us. It was truly a gift to engage in honest conversation on matters that can sometimes be difficult to discuss. When I began the AW journey, I never thought I’d have such a learning curve. Every interview, I have done has a different impact but more than that, I am inspired by each one.

Growing up, I did not understand the importance of embracing my roots. Dominican food, music, culture, and traditions are all part of who I am. My parents are immigrants from the Dominican Republic, who left everything familiar to them and came to the US in search of a better life. Were it not for their dreams, I wouldn’t be where I am today and for that, I will be eternally grateful.

Let’s continue to support Sasha and our Latinos by watching Righteous Thieves. Check your local listings On Digital and On Demand for viewing.

To learn more about Sasha, visit Instagram or Twitter @Sashamerci.

Listen to the AW Confidential Podcast on all streaming services and watch AW Confidential YouTube in its entirety on our YouTube channel to enjoy all the side chats during the interview.

*This interview has been edited and condensed for clarity.

Protected content. 2023 awakened-woman.com

Can You Tell the Difference Between Physical Attraction and Spiritual Connection?

A spontaneous combustion of the physical kind, barely requiring ignition. It can feel like two worlds colliding after moments of heavy flirting or banter. Either can cause an intoxication of emotions exciting and rattling the most sensible person. Some lovers seek insatiable levels of satisfaction from it. Men and women will use the act to hide from real emotion – love. Others will do it strictly for personal pleasure. Then there are those who may be confused by the exhilarating effects.

Sex can sometimes disguise itself as love-making. It can deceive us into thinking physical attraction is love. The act raises the production of oxytocin making one lover feel like they’re bonding with a partner on a romantic level. While the other sees it as something completely different. Truth is, it doesn’t always equate to a true emotional type of love. It can be a liberating form of expressing attraction or emotion and even relieve stress. But the magic can wear off quickly when that is all there is to offer. A physical bond is not sustainable long-term without a true emotional or spiritual connection.

Love exists in many forms. It means different things to different people. Personally, the most rewarding type of love is the one where two people connect on a spiritual level. The moment you have partners bond far beyond the physical working together to strengthen a relationship or family in unison. These two people won’t necessarily be on the same path all the time. They might stray or veer off the path temporarily but they reunite again. They are joined by the belief they’re vested to make this a great love and partnership. It’s work but not hardship, either. Simply, it should feel like you’re collaborating on life’s work. This exchange of giving and fulfillment in a relationship is done to build each other up. Make one another better as human beings. Serve each other’s needs but not in a subservient manner, more so in a kind and considerate way to demonstrate mutual love. Spiritual love can develop even before there is a physical state of intimacy. The absence of physical obsession or infatuation is replaced with unselfishness, inner security, and acceptance of each other. It takes things to a higher level of intimate and emotional love.

I believe this is where the real magic happens – and I’m not referring to the fairy dust kind! The true reward comes when both partners show their true colors. The only way to come into this type of love is without false pretenses or lies. Once each of you has the self-awareness that a bond like this requires. It will take the relationship to a place where all cards are on the table. No one is afraid to ask for what they want. Partners express their feelings with respect, love, and compassion.

Relationships take different shapes affected by experiences, circumstances, and purpose. Each one of us gets to accept what is fulfilling or not. There are some people that will take a less than desired situation believing it’s all they can attain. Or it’s all they can manage at a specific time in their lives. We make the choice. Women don’t have to settle for less than they deserve. What type of love connection do you want? How do we get it? I’m still figuring out the details but what I do know is that none of it can happen without making a true commitment to self, first.

I will leave you with one suggestion, sit quietly and ask yourself what fills your heart. What gives you pure joy and satisfaction? Once you can provide those things for yourself then you’ll attract the right partner to add more of that into your life. You should complement one another’s desires deepening the love ties. It will never be perfect but love never is – it just has to be right by you.

Spiritual love starts from within and then spreads like wildfire into all the other areas of your life.

“Protected content. Updated 2023. awakened-woman.com”

Empowerment Series: Television Host and News Personality, 2-Time Emmy Winning Reporter, Producer & Host, NBC’s NYLive and Today Show, Joelle Garguilo Shares Good News with AW

Joelle Garguilo is an Emmy Winning Reporter, Producer, and Media Personality seen on NBC’s New York Live and Today Show. The journalist is strikingly genuine, possessing a jovial attitude that makes her interview style delightful.

AW had the wonderful opportunity to sit down with the Television Host to discuss the feel-good stories we love so much, where she highlights the Big Apple’s unsung heroes. Men and women who inspire communities and make a difference in the lives of everyday New Yorkers. Joelle has an uncanny talent for delivering her stories with great empathy that encourages connection.

Her energy is infectious, making it easy to have a conversation. The mother of two cares about the people in her stories and wants us to know, that they matter. In a world, where our attention span is fleeting, I challenge you to take a moment to learn about the story behind Joelle’s “Why?”

As a Writer and Founder of my platform, I am learning that people want to be inspired. What have you learned from telling uplifting stories and giving a voice to the people doing great things? The world can be a depressing place but when you have a platform like the one I am on, NBC Universal, which is one of the biggest markets in New York City, it is a privilege. I will always love doing the celebrity interviews but I think it’s the everyday people that are so incredible. They don´t always get the spotlight, which is why it’s so important to fight for those stories. People love these stories. Don´t you want to watch something that helps those who deserve it? The power of what we do is amazing. It is an honor to be able to say”Hey, let’s put them on the show, offer an opportunity to highlight that small business.

During this process, what has been your biggest lesson as a human being? I have a big heart, I have always known that I care so much, and sometimes it gets me in trouble. It is a hard question to answer but I think the importance of speaking up, even when it’s not the most popular thing to do. If you believe in what you are doing then trust your heart. Trust your gut.

New Yorkers are perceived as cold and uncaring but we pull together when needed in big and small ways. You are using your platform to share the stories of people making a difference or embracing their greatness. Why do you share these particular profiles and what do you hope people will feel when they watch them on the show? You have to get out of your world because your world is not the only one out there. Every one of these stories has someone we can learn from, whether it’s their culture, upbringing, or experience. I know that you are not me and I am not you but if I can fully understand what others have lived, if I can walk in your shoes, it may help me understand what you’ve been through. When you are able to shine the light on others, you can inspire the world.

You are so good at what you do, which shows in the way you connect with the people in your stories. It is impossible to feel invisible in your presence. I am sure the subjects of your interview feel seen when in your presence. Have you ever been completely moved by someone, who couldn’t believe you wanted to share their story? Grandma Dawn is a woman who wants to make sure every child and adult knows how to read. She had the desire to share her love of books. Grandma’s Place, in Harlem, is a book and toy store that fueled the dream of a bookmobile, collecting 28,000 books, one for every child who is homeless. I remember going into the store and feeling it was special, and Grandma Dawn saying ¨I can´t believe I have a story.”

Everybody has a story. You have to separate your “What” from your Why.” Why do you do, what you do? Grandma Dawn was a child in the library, books were her escape in her life at the time. She knew what it was like to grow up with a parent who wasn’t around. Seeing the poverty in her area, she wanted to provide resources that would encourage the kids to do better.

In an interview with Bella Magazine, you said “You have learned empathy, understanding, and how to be a better human.” In my opinion, it makes you an effective and fantastic storyteller! What haven’t you learned yet, that you think would get you closer to the woman, mother, and human you hope to evolve into? I don´t know! I could use some help with time management, and getting out of my own head. But I think it’s a beautiful thing, sometimes it is OK, not to know. I am totally ok with that, just knowing that I want to get better.

You deliver stories that inspire us. What inspires you? Conversations like this! Knowing there are good people out there is inspiring. We can lift one another, the table is big enough for everyone.

I like to end our interviews with a positive message. Sometimes, life’s experiences can harden us. What words of inspiration or encouragement can you share with listeners that may be feeling cynical about life? Setbacks can actually be setups but you don’t realize it at the time, you are going through your mess. It can take a year or years to get where you want but I promise, if you can see them as setups, you are going to be better off!  I’ve gotten so stuck on certain things that have happened that I wasn’t letting other things happen in my career. The setbacks prepared me for the other Emmy and to do what I’m doing now but I had to let go of these setbacks, so like Elsa¨Let It Go¨

There is no better way than to end this interview with a quote from Joelle,¨Find that thing that is you and stay true to yourself.” She holds true to what she says, she found her gift and remains humble. AW is grateful to bring this story to its readers, as it is filled with goodness.

Life has countless challenges. We can easily be discouraged by the events that take place around us. So, how do you fight back the negativity? Spread the good news, help raise the voices of people who inspire, and make it your mission to choose a positive tone to cancel out the noise. Hopefully, Joelle’s work is a reminder that it’s not all bad news, out there!

You can watch the full interview with Joelle on the AW YouTube channel or listen to the AW Confidential Podcast found on Spotify, Apple Podcast, Anchor, and everywhere you find your podcasts.

To learn more about this amazing human, visit her Instagram, Twitter:@joellegarguilo or http://www.joellegarguilo.com

This interview has been condensed for clarity.*

Protected content. Updated 2023 awakened-woman.com

Empowerment Series: Beverly Hills Licensed Psychologist, Clinical Director of SHAPE Center, and Sexual Health Expert, Dr. Shannon Chavez Educates AW During Sexual Health Awareness Month

September is Sexual Health Awareness Month. The topic of sex, as a whole, can trigger embarrassment, alarm, or delight. There can be different reactions, depending on gender, culture, upbringing, and experiences lived. Men are perceived to be more confident when talking about it, while women, can be more private. However, modern times are changing the landscape and encouraging direct dialogue. We are increasingly less intimidated to discuss the things that long ago were taboo.

Nationally recognized experts such as Dr. Shannon Chavez, a Clinical Psychologist based in Beverly Hills, California are helping demystify the subject of sexual health. She is using her teachings to encourage a candid exchange on the topic. The educator and therapist has been featured in major media platforms including  Cosmopolitan, Glamour, Women’s Health, HuffPost, The New York Times, GQ, Men’s Health, and others. Recently, Dr. Chavez partnered with the #1 dating app for Latiné singles, Chispa to help couples navigate the sometimes, intimidating topic. Together, they are working on providing a safe and supportive space to have honest conversations about sex.

AW sat down with Dr. Chavez to discuss prioritizing our sexual well-being, open communication in relationships, sexual fulfillment, cultural influences that shape our views about sexuality, and improving the way we think about sex.

Many of us struggle with expressing our wants or needs, particularly with a partner or someone we are dating. Oftentimes, as women, we look to please, forgetting that we also require attention. When navigating conversations about our desires, what have you found to be the biggest challenge that couples face in relationships? Would you say the problem is communication or knowing what we want? Great question and it is a little bit of both, to be honest. The issue may be with vulnerability. We know how to communicate but there is hesitation to relay the information. Fear of judgment or shame, wanting something that may be different from our partner’s wants or needs. We have learned this idea of “normal” sexuality then there is – everything else but the reality is that we have diverse sexualities.

Sexuality and sexual health are about intimacy, pleasure, and connection. There are many ways to have that, we will have differences in what those are. There is a barrier, communicating is a vulnerability because we don’t know what the outcome is going to be. Plenty of people have had negative outcomes. Possibly, a partner has laughed at them, ignored the conversation, or felt their embarrassment. An experience like that can lead to shutting down or feeling reservations about sharing interests.

In your opinion, what is something we can do as individuals or partners to improve how we share our desires? I would recommend that people focus on individual health before partnered intimacy. Ask yourself the questions, first. When I work with people individually, I find that it is hard for them to even ask themselves, “What are my values? How do I feel about monogamy or openness?” Doing that self-reflection and checking one’s awareness will offer some bullet points. It can give you a sense of intention around communication. Doing a bit of reconciliation around the questions can help. It may not necessarily make it easier but helps us figure out true wants which is a great first step!

Growing up Latina, in a Dominican household,  the word “sex” was a no-no. Discussions about our bodies, desires, or sexual health in general did not happen. I have worked hard to break that cycle with my daughter and do something different.  In your experience, how can cultural influences shape our perception of sexuality? How will your partnership with Chispa help improve the way we embrace identity while exploring preferences? I love this question. Thank you for sharing your experience because it was mine too, being raised in a conservative Latino household. This was one of the reasons, why, I began this work. Culture has a lot to do with our programming, working models of love, relationships, success, and so many of these teachings that run deep. We have generations of traditions, teachings, modeling, and observation. Therefore, when we are changing them, it can seem like a huge leap outside of our comfort zone. We can feel like we are being bad or naughty, carrying guilt with these emotions.

Focusing on unique experiences in our culture is so important. It was one of the reasons for this partnership with Chispa. This is a dating app for Latino singles who are going out and dealing with issues that we all share. We can help you navigate these situations and reconcile how to hold on to your culture while embracing a modern world. There are new rules for dating and people are using technology.

As Latinos, we are prideful about our culture but there is still shame around sex. We need to learn that it can be empowering. My role is to educate and make the subject approachable without fear of talking about it. I’d like to encourage the normalizing of discussions around the topic. Get beyond the barriers that impede us from pleasure and connection.

There appears to be shame in conversations about sexual fulfillment. How can your strategies help build a stronger connection with a partner in this area and increase relationship satisfaction? My biggest goal is to broaden individuals’ and couple’s understanding of what sex is because it is not just having it. It’s all under the umbrella of intimacy. The way we interact, communicate, negotiate, compromise, and share with empathy and not judgment. Curiosity about experiences with pleasure looks different for everyone. If we get caught up in the idea of “This is sex,” we’ll find a large number of men and women are not satisfied or motivated by only that aspect of sexual health. Instead, having emotional intimacy, quality time together, and being able to connect on various elements taking place in your life can lead to more desire for play and pleasure. Bringing that integration into the relationship is key. We have found that sex and pleasure are much more than what we have been taught it is, especially for women. We need to feel empowered about sexuality. Pleasure is about learning to understand your body, anatomy, and how things work. Remember, it will be different for women than it is for men. We are wired, and our bodies respond, differently than theirs.

I appreciate the work being done by you and Chispa to empower others to take charge of their sexual health. Making trustworthy information available to men and women can inspire new and improved connections. Can you share what type of resources are being made available to the community during September, Sexual Health Awareness Month? We have created sexual health videos and resources that include questions that you may not want to ask a friend, partner, or doctor. Discussions around common issues that can happen at different stages during your life span, relative to sex and sexuality.

Whether you are a man or a woman who is in a partnership, or not, it is essential to learn about your sexual health to be able to manage situations and questions or avoid awkward moments. For more, visit findtuchispa.com

We like to end AW interviews with a piece of advice, mantra, or quote to inspire. As we celebrate Sexual Health Awareness Month, what message would you like to share about the importance of taking charge of your sexual health and navigating its challenges? I think the most important thing is to start where you are! It does not matter if you think you are behind or in the dark. I tell clients, that not knowing is a good place to begin. This is the point where we can find and access what is needed to feel more confident. Age is not a factor, we are always learning. I’m constantly learning new things every day. It’s part of the process and making that fun and approachable is key. No shame and no ego should be in play. Taking care of your sexual health is my mantra for everyone!

AW is grateful to Dr. Chavez for providing her expertise on a subject that at times is uncomfortable to openly talk about with others. Long gone are the days when the stigma around sex would scare us into a sentence of dissatisfaction. The fact is that we are sexual beings and sexual health is a part of our overall wellness.

This is an opportunity to learn, and maybe keep an open mind to doing things a different way.

To learn more about Dr. Shannon Chavez, visit her website or Instagram@drshannochavez

Listen to the AW Confidential Podcast on all streaming services. You can also watch this Confidential YouTube to enjoy all the side chats during the interview.

*This interview has been edited and condensed for clarity.

Protected content. 2023 awakened-woman.com

Empowerment Series: Founder & CEO of Rizos Curls, Julissa Prado Shares her Entrepreneurial Journey with AW

In 2020, Julissa Prado was named the newest winner of Beacon Awards Entrepreneur of the Year, as announced by Indie Beauty Media Group (IBMG), publisher of Beauty Independent (BI).

Rizos Curls Hydrating Shampoo & Deep Conditioner made Allure’s 2023 Best of Beauty Award list of winners. The dreams have gotten bigger and it’s founder continues to inspire millions of Latinas.

The entrepreneur is no stranger to media, appearing in publications such as O, The Oprah Magazine, Forbes, Allure, Popsugar, Refinery 29, People en Espanol, Cosmopolitan, Buzzfeed, and Glamour are a few of the platforms praising her product line. The self-funded and Latina-owned company started in 2017 and is now estimated to be worth over $1 Million. The Mexican-American daughter of immigrants grew up in Los Angeles. She holds curls, community, and culture in high regard, it’s what inspired Rizos Curls fueling accomplishments along the way.

It is invigorating to hear about this young woman’s journey, as her dreams continue to unfold before our eyes. All you have to do is hop over to her Instagram or TikTok to see that she is just one of the girls. Julissa is personable, genuine, and grounded when discussing her success.  

This is the inspiring story of a 14-year-old girl who wished to solve a problem. She wanted to create a product that catered to curly-haired girls like her. Ultimately, she did much more because it evolved into a movement. Her social media is a testament to the love and loyalty her products are getting from followers.

We are witnessing more women take chances on entrepreneurship since the pandemic of 2020. It encouraged introspection, forcing us to question our sense of purpose. Plenty of people are stuck in jobs that leave them unfulfilled or dissatisfied. Julissa has a Bachelor’s degree in International Business from UCLA and a Master’s in Business Management from Wake Forest University. She did well as a District Sales Leader for Nestle then decided to invest her energy full-time into Rizos Curls. I was interested in finding out more about how she transformed an idea into a company and reached out to her team in 2021 to learn more about her journey.

When did you know it was time to quit your day job? I went full-time with Rizos Curls soon after we launched, within a month or two. I never anticipated this change happening so soon after starting the business. I thought Rizos Curls would be my side passion project while I worked at Nestle for a few more years. Luckily, there were many orders when we first launched, I couldn’t keep up. I was forced to go full-time to keep up with demand.

Congratulations on being a Beacon Award winner! There are plenty of highs to be proud of these past couple of years. Your brand is widely recognized as a top contender in the beauty and hair community, and you’ve seen yourself on an enormous billboard in Midtown Manhattan. Your hair products are on Walmart store shelves, as well as, Target which you manifested years ago. In an interview with Oprahmag.com, you are described as “passionate, when discussing the pursuit of your dreams – and the fact that it would not have been possible to realize without great sacrifice.”

So far, what has been your biggest sacrifice? Would you do it all the same, again? An incredibly difficult decision for every entrepreneur is knowing when to go full-time. In starting Rizos Curls, I decided to leave my high-paying leadership position at Nestle and take the leap of an entrepreneur without knowing what would lie ahead. It can be very scary for new entrepreneurs, I had to determine what the cost of the opportunity, meant to me. I knew in my heart that I needed to invest in my passion. Once I took this step, you wouldn’t believe the amount of people who stepped forward to propel me along my journey. I’d definitely do it all over again. I would not be here now without the decisions and sacrifices made.

I read that when your Facebook group first went live, you rapidly climbed from 100 to 30,000 followers. Women were engaging with you because you responded to their needs, resolving a problem. You helped them work through their hair emergencies. Your social media brand is a testament to your authenticity. Sharing the journey with everyone makes your audience feel they’re more than a number. You have growing a community, it tells a lot about you, as a person. You’re likable, relatable, and real, it encourages customers and clients to trust you and what you stand for.

What advice would you give someone just starting to build a brand? I would say this for anyone who wants to start any business. Pursue your passion! You will never have all the answers but you can seek out resources around you and your community for guidance, they will push you forward. Start small if you need to, and grow from there. Stay true to yourself and the vision, as it will allow you to connect with customers, build loyalty, and ensure success. Be incredibly creative, both in terms of content and business operations. Stay ahead of the game and don’t be afraid to reach out to your customers for assistance. Some of the best ideas may come from your own customer base.

You are a vibrant, young, thriving entrepreneur who is building her own empire. Success is sweeter when you know you’ve put the work in, implementing ideas that level up the business. However, these are some things that prove challenging, it takes time to see results.

How did you surpass the tough days when you weren’t sure the venture would take off? What do you do to get over the deals, proposals, and projects turned down or when these don’t happen as fast as you’d like? Being an entrepreneur is incredibly humbling. On a daily, I face obstacles that I have NO clue how to overcome. I’m constantly learning something new to add to my skill set. I had to come to terms with the fact that there is a lot, I still don’t know. Being a good student, having the ability to quickly learn the things I don’t know is invaluable. I am a believer that what is meant to be will be, as long as, I walk in my purpose, the right doors will open. When projects are turned down or don’t happen, I don’t stress. Having trust in what is meant for me is key, if it does not happen then something else will come in its place.

In an Instagram post, you said that you love sunlight! What do you love most about the journey you are on as a Latina woman designing her own rules? I love that I’m able to connect with so many people in the curly hair community all over the world on something I feel so passionate about – curly hair! Incredibly proud to have formed a self-funded independent brand that is a mission-based company focused on the 3 C’s – curls, community, and culture!

We sometimes change a lot of who we are to accommodate others, fit a mold, or maintain relationships, so much so that we forget ourselves in the process. You are fierce about your Latina roots, and your people and embracing all that you are in an unapologetic manner. We love and celebrate it!

Can you share an experience when you felt you were not being true to yourself? What was the turning point that helped you realize you did not have to change or conform to anyone’s concept of beauty? As a woman, hair is a big part of how we internalize our beauty. Growing up, I was often made fun of for my hair. I was called everything from Puff Ball, and Frizz Ball to other undesired names. Unfortunately, hearing the negative comments motivated me to want long, straight hair. It wasn’t until High School, that I started embracing my natural hair and really loving myself. I went to a progressive high school where we learned race theory, and the many standards of beauty internalized, as a result of the systems of inequality against people of color. I realized that I needed to embody my hair to encourage the dismantling of previous beliefs related to hair being ugly.

I like to end the AW interviews with a positive message. Can you share a positive mantra or quote that empowered you while starting the dream that is now materializing? My favorite business mantra is “Makeup in creativity is what you lack in marketing dollars.” I saved for over 5 years before launching Rizos Curls, it is 100% self-funded and still is today. A round of venture capital is not required to get started and excel in your space.

Julissa began her business out of her cousin’s garage. Today, you will find her Rizos Curls products on the shelves of Target and Ulta. How is that for growth? Youth gives us the freedom to dream but sometimes, as we age, we become incredulous. The pressures of life and responsibilities that we bear, ground us. Whether it is reality or insecurity, there is a tendency to stop daring ourselves to go after the things we want most. If you are a dreamer, I hope Julissa’s story serves as a reminder of the power you have to create the life envisioned. The only one that can stop you from achieving your dream is you.

Protected content. Updated 2023. awakened-woman.com

Original interview 2021*

Empowerment Series: Dominican-American Writer, Journalist, Digital Creator & Content Strategist, Johanna Ferreira Shares Career Hurdles with AW

A writer’s journey is filled with rejection and uncertainty but that is only the beginning of the challenges faced by Latinx Journalists. According to a 2023 Bloomberg article, the Government Accountability Office (GAO) published a report in 2021 that showed 8% of people in publishing were Latino. A 2022 follow-up report, reflected 7% of writers, authors, and editors were Latino. The numbers don’t lie. We are mostly being iced out of an already small community. However, despite the roadblocks, we are seeing more of us gain traction across the industry. 

Johanna Ferreira is a Latinx Writer, Journalist, Digital Creator, and Content Strategist. She has bylines in high-profile media outlets such as Refinery 29, Allure, Byrdie, Oprah Magazine, InStyle Magazine, Travel & Leisure, and many others. This trailblazer is creating dynamic content that celebrates modern Latinx culture that’s relevant across our diverse communities.

AW had the amazing opportunity to interview Johanna. We had an unfiltered conversation about her experience in media from personal hurdles to amazing connections. My favorite part of the interview was her response to my question about female support during her journey. It provided me with a sense of comfort and something to strive for, as I move up the ladder.

Read, watch, or listen, as we explore key topics to help inspire your journey. I hope you are also reminded of the power you have to create opportunities in the most unlikely places. When we believe we can, anything is possible. 

I somewhat fell into my writing career. There was no blueprint to follow or people in my life that could answer questions about this field, it was unchartered territory. We both come from Latino households. I am Dominican, my parents were immigrants. It was ingrained into my head that success meant a career in law or medicine. Did your parents challenge your decision to pursue journalism? Did you have any personal reservations when you started this journey?  I love it when I’m asked this question because it is a fun way to introduce people to my unique upbringing, as a Dominican-American kid and share more about my parents. I feel like your experience is typical of most Dominican kids who grew up in the States, persons of color, or anyone with immigrant parents.

I am a second-generation Dominican-American from Queens. My parents grew up in the Dominican Republic, both migrated to the United States in the early 1970s. There were numerous waves of migration from the Dominican Republic to the United States starting in the 1930s because of the Rafael Trujillo regime. One of the biggest waves prior to the 1980s, when many Dominicans migrated to Washington Heights and The Bronx was the arrival of Dominican migrants between 1966 and 1978 which is when my parents arrived in New York, settling in Corona, Queens. They came young, during Junior High School ages, and grew up with working-class parents. My dad attended dental school at NYU, and like my mom, he speaks native Spanish and English, the same as I do. It is a privilege to have my parents be Americanized, it allowed my siblings and I to pursue the careers that we envisioned for ourselves versus the careers they might have wanted for us. They wanted us to have the same freedoms and opportunity.

In terms of having personal reservations about pursuing a career as a Writer, particularly in media, I didn’t have doubts about it. Honestly, the second I was able to get into the “flow” figure out my purpose, and feel the fire, I knew that I wanted to be a Writer. Nothing has come close to that feeling. So, I did not have reservations but I did feel scared. The discouragement came from everyone in the media being White.  The women in Media were white, magazines and those with bylines were also White, and the stories were about White people.  Thankfully, I had a professor who said to me, “Don’t get discouraged. Don’t get upset. Get into the field, so you can make the difference.” It was the beginning of doing the work from a purpose-driven space.  

Statistics tell a story.  There aren’t many Latinos in our field of work. You have a successful career in journalism. You probably had to break some barriers to get to where you are. As an insider working in Media and Publishing, what do you think are some of the hurdles Latinos confront as Writers, Journalists, and Editors as they look for their place in this very small world? In terms of obstacles and hurdles, they still exist in Media and Publishing. First, the industries are different but, as far as these in the US, neither was created with us in mind. The majority of media that most of us consume, even as people of color, are not portraying stories about people like us. If you have not worked in Media, Publishing, Film and Television, and Music, White male-dominated industries, you wouldn’t understand how gatekeeping works, it is a thing. I think this has been a problem until more of us started doing something about it but it has not been easy. 

I am honored and grateful for the way you described success. I only began considering myself successful in the past year. I think a lot of us who work in this industry have a hard time getting in the door.  I was competing with non-Latinos who attended NYU and Columbia. I’m a Dominican kid who went to Baruch, a CUNY school, not receiving the same guidance, as others. It is the reason, I began working in Latin niche Media before entering Corporate Media because I wasn’t finding the opportunities or jobs.

Sometimes, you get the job but there are countless barriers you have to get through to execute the vision you have. Many of us are doing the best we can with the resources we’ve been handed in the industry. We have a long way to go but we should take time to acknowledge how far we’ve come.

In an industry where there are a handful of coveted spots. Sometimes, it can feel like the competition is fierce. Do you feel like you have received any support from fellow Latina professionals in the field? I am going to be very honest. This does not resonate with me. Have there been other Latine people in my circle who have not been supportive or perhaps competitive? Sure but it is so rare. I am, where I am in my career because of the tremendous support received from other Latinas and Latinos in Media. We show up for each other in different ways, at events, on podcasts, and recommend one another for opportunities. We are each other’s biggest cheerleaders. There is something really beautiful about showing up, as a community.

We like to end AW interviews with a quote, mantra, or advice to inspire our community. For listeners looking to get their foot in the door or start working toward a dream, passion, or purpose. What are some tips you can offer? Mindset. The mind is incredibly powerful. I often repeat this mantra, especially in the morning, “Your personality creates your personal reality,” used by Scientist, Author, and Public Speaker, Joe Dispenza. This way of thinking has allowed me to manifest things, I want in life.

You can help manifest your own desires. Stop the negative thoughts, self-limiting beliefs, comparisons, and scarcity, and focus on the person you want to be and the life you want to live. It will not happen magically, you must believe in your gift and take a chance on yourself – do the work.

In terms of getting into the writing business in media, specifically. We are living in a time when we are fortunate to have plenty of ways to tell our story and get it out into the world. Podcasting, TikTok, Instagram, create a newsletter! I notice that people have a tough time starting. Just write. Allow yourself to see where it can take you. If you want to write for a particular media outlet then research and read that content. Also, it’s so important to craft that pitch!

AW is incredibly grateful to Johanna for her candidness during our interview. She is an inspiring Latina who is using her gift to highlight our talent and create change by empowering rising Latinx Journalists to write our stories, unapologetically.

If you are an optimist, you will see that progress is happening, even if it’s at a snail’s pace. Our presence across the nation is increasing. We have a voice and should use that power to continue telling our truths.  Sharing them will help conserve the rich history and culture of our community. Remember, one of the best ways to counteract mainstream media’s misrepresentation of our people is to use the tools we have to deliver our own perspectives and experiences. Hopefully, this brings a better understanding to the world about who we are and breaks down the stereotypes that have long lived in our society. 

Let’s celebrate our talent, not only during Hispanic Heritage Month but all year round!

Listen to this episode of the AW Confidential Podcast on all streaming services and watch it on our YouTube channel to enjoy all the side chats during the interview.

*This interview has been edited and condensed for clarity.

Protected content. 2023 awakened-woman.com

Empowerment Series: Award-Winning Filmmaker, Afro-Latina Actress, Netflix “Purple Hearts,” and Freevee’s Casa Grande Star, Loren Escandón Shares her Legacy with AW

Award speeches often begin with a celebration of accomplishments. We see the person in his or her glory and seldom think about the hardship endured on the way to the win.

Loren Escandón graduated with a degree in Theatre from Universidad del Valle in Colombia. Instead of staying put in her native country, she made a bold move. The fearless Latina moved to the US to pursue dreams of making a splash in the entertainment industry without so much as speaking the English language. There were plenty of roadblocks on the path she chose for herself, none of which dissuaded her from becoming who she was meant to be.

Today, her life in Los Angeles looks different than the one she left behind. Loren is an award-winning Filmmaker, Actor, Director, and Writer who has an impressive resume in Hollywood. Millions will recognize her as Marisol, the single mother to Cassie, played by Sofia Carson in the Netflix hit film, Purple Hearts. She has also guest starred in popular television series like Truth Be Told, Gentefied, CBS’ S.W.A.T, Fox’s 9-11, FX’s Crime Story, CW’s The Messengers, HBO’s Selena: The Series, and many more.

In 2022, Loren’s film, Los Patines won several awards.  In May 2023, she stars in Freeve’s much anticipated bilingual, five-part series, Casa Grande.

AW had the incredible opportunity to sit down with the actress to discuss her role in the new series, Latino Representation, challenges and lessons coming into the entertainment industry, and the legacy she would like to leave for future generations. Our interview will be inspiring to any dreamer who is on the verge of giving up. If you are close to quitting on everything you’ve ever wanted, Loren says “Don’t, do it!” I hope this interview provides the motivation needed to keep your dream alive.

Latino representation is critical in all industries. You have been passionate about playing women of color. In your newest role, you play Ximena Morales, Rafael’s wife and Mael’s mother. She dreams of a better future for her family while managing the realities of circumstances. Can you share a bit about the premise of the series and your character? Also, tell us, why was it essential for you to play this role. The name of the series is Casa Grande, it is on Freevee and I hope everyone watches it! This is a free platform that makes it convenient for you to access the programming. No subscription is needed, which is one of the reasons we love it and made our home there.

Casa Grande’s story revolves around four different families. You experience their values, beliefs, and perspectives on life, all these things conjure in this place. But at the same time, what is great about the show is how being trapped in this environment under particular circumstances becomes almost like a reflection of society, overall. The drama portrays love, loyalty, and betrayal, it shows how all these feelings can bring out the best and worst in humanity. In that exploration of family, class, religion, culture, and immigration, we find that at the end of the day, we’re all humans trying to have a life that’s worth living.

Ximena Morales is a hard-working mom but fun too! The reason, I really wanted to play her from the beginning. I felt a need to craft this woman in a way that honors all the farm workers in this country. I never really thought about the produce that goes into my refrigerator or the stories that come with the fruits and vegetables we bring to the table. I wanted to play the role with respect to the farmworkers that are often overseen or stereotyped by the idea of who we think they are. Humanizing these stories, especially in the political environment we are living is important.

You graduated with a degree in Theatre from Universidad del Valle in Colombia then made the brave move to come to the US to pursue your dreams. I can imagine that you had some challenges stepping into this career. Latinos had been invisible in Hollywood for decades but they are finally carving a space in front and behind the cameras. As a dreamer and proud “Colombiana,” who was coming into the entertainment business for the first time. What was your biggest struggle and greatest lesson, as you assimilated into this difficult industry? I think one of the biggest struggles encountered when I came to this country had to do with the perception of who I was. I moved here not speaking the language, so I wasn’t able to communicate at all.  I was an educated woman in Colombia but had to find a way out because representation was limited, there. My thinking was, I’d go to America, and it would be different. But I found myself in the same circumstances. In addition, I had the challenge of being an immigrant, a woman of color, who did not speak the language. Due to all those facts, people had their own idea of who I was and it wasn’t even close to who I really am, so that was a huge struggle. Now, I needed to identify as Latina which I didn’t need to do in Colombia, we were all the same. When the roles started coming around, I noticed how I was being perceived. The business believed there were only certain types of roles, I could play.

This is why Diversity & Inclusion is so important. Latinos are not a monolith. We don’t all look and sound one way. We are not a single culture but many, rich in diversity. The fact that the business saw all Latinos one way was another struggle. But this also offered my biggest lesson, don’t sit and wait for the business and industry to write the character you want for yourself. Figure out a way to create those projects that portray your culture from your point of view.

In recent years, Diversity and Inclusion have taken the spotlight, opening up opportunities for us in a range of industries. As an Afro-Latina who is not only an Actor but also Filmmaker, Director, Writer, and Activist. How do you secure your contribution to the representation of Latinos in the industry? There are different paths for me to do so. As an Actress, I am mindful of the characters that I portray. I have been blessed and feel privileged to say, “No” to some projects that come my way. If I don’t feel it represents my culture, demographic group, and race with dignity and pride, I turn it down. Everyone’s situation is different. It is financially complicated but I want to be able to have some sort of control over where I want to focus my craft.

As a Film Director, this changes because I can choose the stories that I want to tell, as well as, maintain some control over who I handpick to tell them with. In that sense, I always look to find the most diverse collaborators for my projects. It is a priority, for example, in my latest film “The Last Store,” the cast was all women of color and the only male character was Black. All heads of departments were women, and ninety-five percent of the crew were people of color. The film “Los Patines” was an all-female cast with everyone behind the camera being people of color. This is my contribution to help make a change in the industry. We have to start hiring our own people, repeatedly, until that happens, we are not there, yet.

You have played many great roles and continue to build this amazing career in front and behind the cameras. I love seeing empowered Latinas thrive! You have much more to do in your career but when you look towards the future. What do you hope your legacy will be for the next generation? I’d like my legacy to be, leaving an industry that does not need to think about inclusion, anymore. I would love to leave a body of work that represents my culture with pride, is a model to follow, and is a reflection of society. As an Afro-Latina in particular, leave behind stories that are as far away as possible from the stereotypes. Instead, present the richness, universality, and uniqueness that we are and have a company where everyone can be themselves.

We like to end AW interviews with a quote, mantra, or advice to inspire. What encouraging words do you have for anyone who may think they need to bargain their authenticity to be successful? Don’t do it, it’s not worth it. The value of who you are is in your art, persona, and humanity. It is who you are – your authentic self that truly matters. Don’t compromise your vision, or morality because there is no success without those elements.  As an artist, you are your biggest possession, and the more clear you are about who you are, the more it translates into your art. It’s the thing that helps you connect with people in the most intimate and profound ways.

I’d also say, keep going, do not stop! My character in Purple Hearts would say “Quien no ariesga, no gana.” No risk, no gain. My daughter in the film, played by Sofia Carson has the tattoo and my mom used to say that all the time. When I started playing this character, I revisited this idea. It was when I had those words tattooed on myself. It has become my mantra. You have to create your own opportunities and make things happen for yourself. In this process, the one thing you cannot do is lose your authenticity. If you lose that, you lose yourself.

Loren came to this country believing that she could be everything, she imagined. She did not speak, read or understand the English language. The Latina was not privy to connections that gave her a boost to climb the Hollywood ladder.  Knowing who she is and what she was capable of sparked a fire. The combination of hard work, perseverance, and an unrelenting faith in herself has helped her stay on the path to greatness. All things are possible when you believe in yourself. Once you surrender to the idea that you can do anything, well, the sky is the limit.

AW is extremely grateful for every one of these interviews. We appreciate the talent and the collaborators working behind the scenes to help it all come together. I am inspired, just as much as you, by every conversation. It is far from easy to create something out of nothing. Women like Loren continue to fuel my dreams and encourage me to continue making contributions that help light a match in the life of others looking for inspiration. Hopefully, you are left feeling empowered to go out there and reach for your own star.

You can listen to this episode of the AW Confidential Podcast on all streaming services and watch it on our YouTube channel to enjoy all the side chats during the interview.

Check out Casa Grande, playing on Freevee now! To learn more about Loren, visit Loren Escandon, on Instagram, and Twitter @Lorenescandon

*This interview has been edited and condensed for clarity.

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When They Cheat – We Boss Up! Big Pay Day for Vanderpump Rules’ Reality Star, Newest Cast Member, Dancing with the Stars, Ariana Madix

Bravo’s Vanderpump Rules has been monopolizing our cell phone and television screens for months, now. If you haven’t heard about the latest and greatest reality drama then you must be living under a rock. The “Scandoval” story spread like wildfire and we were here for it! Millions of fans and spectators are still trying to dissect the zig-zags of the shocking revelation that took place in the 10th season. The scandal even caught the attention of some of the most well-known news networks like NBC, CNN, and ABC News.

People can’t seem to get enough of Ariana Madix after news broke in March that her partner of nine years, Tom Sandoval was having an affair with her bestie, Raquel Leviss. Since then, the reality star has taken body revenge to new heights. She leveled up and is projected to generate serious money from dozens of opportunities resulting from the very public incident.

How is that for payback, baby? No, but seriously, she is laughing all the way to the bank.

If you’ve ever dealt with a cheater, you know what the stinger can do. Sometimes, it takes years to heal from the mental and emotional anguish caused by betrayal. It is disheartening to find out that the person you trusted most with your heart has stomped it to pieces. The lies, disrespect, and duplicity make it hard to confide in anyone, again. This type of trauma can leave partners feeling insecure and inadequate. It has the potential to damage a person’s stability, producing anxiety and depression for the one left behind to clean up the mess.

The great news is that we can come back from the devastation. However, it is crucial to deal with the ordeal that has taken place. These 3 basic steps may help get you out from under the shambles.

1. Confront pain head-on. Numbing yourself will do more harm than good. Look for healthy outlets to cope with the toxicity. Finding a release to boost endorphins is key. Try exercise, dancing, or laughter for a better effect.

2. Seek support from friends, family, and therapists, as needed. Oftentimes, we feel shame, it’s normal. This is a good time to remind you that you should never feel responsible for someone else’s actions. Do not accept culpability for his or her behavior. It will help to talk things through with loved ones. Allow yourself to cry it out or have a venting session. It does serve you to keep it all inside. Let your people love you through the pain.

3. Do not assume that you are the problem. Cheating is rarely about sex. There are different reasons that do not involve sexual satisfaction. For example, a partner’s need to please the ego, falling out of love, loneliness due to long distances, fears of commitment,  variety, lack of emotional connection, boredom, tit-for-tat. Over and over again, we think it’s our behavior that causes the indiscretion. Know that you are enough and deserve better.

Millions of us have experienced infidelity at some point in our lives. Too often, we resort to food, alcohol, toxicity, and self-destructive ways to deal with the loss of the object of our affection. We don’t have to play the role of martyr, anymore. It is time to flip the switch!

Ariana turned a negative into a positive. It has been a few months since the cheating scandal almost broke the internet and the woman is on fire! She has a large following rallying behind her, as she makes big moves.

In addition to the salary from Vanderpump Rules, there is the Maloney-Madix merch line, several lucrative brands, and sponsorship deals that include BIC Razors, Bloomingdales, Uber One, Bellesa Boutique, SoFi, and Lay’s Chips. She is also part of a joint venture, sandwich restaurant Something About Her which is sure to be a hit with supporters. The latest news predicts even more dollars to hit her account. Ariana is rumored to be joining the next Dancing with the Stars and has been cast in a new Lifetime movie.

I would say that is revenge well served, no?

Certainly, I am not trying to belittle the heartache. I’ve been there and know what it feels like to have the person you love deceit you in such a way that it rips into your soul. It’s devastating but we have the ability to conquer this torment. If you are experiencing similar troubles, my hope is that her story inspires you to push forward.

You don’t have to take things lying down. Let this be a sign in your life. The mistake and the loss belong to the person that violated your trust. Believe that you are stronger than what happens to you. We’re born with the power to withstand suffering. Move forward with resolve and don’t allow yourself to be paralyzed by fear. Choose yourself.

AW celebrates women like Ariana. She is encouraging others to fight back and become empowered after heartbreak. The Bravo celebrity’s net worth stands to surpass the million-dollar mark post-breakup. Proving there is a bigger, bolder, better life after affliction brought on by cheating.

You got this!

Photo by Shutterstock.

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5 Quotes to Inspire You

Quotes are powerful and used by millions to inspire greatness, healing, and change. Words have a purpose, they can empower, inspire, encourage, improve mood, or lift spirits when despair and disappointment take hold of our hearts. Part of the beauty of a citation is its staying power. These live, well beyond the time written and used by many to fortify beliefs, thoughts, ideas, and strong statements.

Our struggles can make us feel like we are alone in our suffering. Figuring out the big questions about relationships, motherhood, career, life, and love isn’t always fun. Painful moments are usually met with resistance and regret, causing great mental anguish.

Using quotes as motivation has become increasingly useful for me when feeling uninspired or troubled, I take to quotes to fill my soul with goodness.

Hopefully, one or more of these quotes will resonate with you in some way, as you forge ahead in your own journey.

“When you reach the end of your rope, tie a knot in it and hang on.” – Franklin D. Roosevelt. Everyone has grappled with troubled times but we can’t allow life to beat us. Hope is always out there waiting to be grabbed by the horns, so find a knot to hold on to and work your way up to the next win. Small steps to the top are how you gain lasting traction.“Everything you want is on the other side of fear.”  – Jack Canfield. Our constant fear of failure or the unknown can stop us from doing the things we want most. If you can live on the other side of fear, imagine all the life you can experience. Challenge brings growth and confidence, if we don’t try, we will never know what we are capable of!“Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly.” – Robert F. Kennedy. Taking a calculated risk or chance on something that you believe in isn’t a mistake, even if it all collapses. Putting yourself, ideas, or missions to the test is the most impactful way to achieve greatness. Failures are lessons disguised.“The phoenix must burn to emerge.” – Janet Fitch. You can rebuild from the ashes you were left in because resilience is your superpower. Our life experiences, good and bad are there to teach. Sometimes life has to break you down to force you to build yourself back up.When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time. – Maya Angelou. We only see what we want, oftentimes denying ourselves the opportunity to see people’s true colors. It is difficult to see a loved one’s ugly but actions tell the story. Do not ignore the red flags. If someone hurts you, don’t allow them a chance to do it again and again.

Life is tough, it’s critical to find ways to help break out of the negativity that can tear us down. I have found myself in front of a wall of Post-it notes scribbled with quotes that are compelling enough to draw me out of sadness. If I can visualize an ounce of positive energy, the light will shine through the cracks.

Running from pain ultimately leads to more hurt. Confronting challenges is the most effective way to approach life. Face problems with courage and over time tackling them should be less daunting.  One decision at a time will get you where you want to be. Using positive reinforcements to get past hardship is a great place to start.

Help looks different for all of us. Hold on to what brings you peace. Moments of distress don’t last forever. As you push through the difficult periods, remember hard times can bring unimagined transformation. What you do with the life you are gifted and how you manage the ordeals make a world of difference, as you move toward the future.

Power up! The strength you need is already within, all it takes to bring it is for you to hold on a little bit longer. You can do this!

What is your go-to quote during hard times?

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