Yvette Bodden's Blog, page 9

Stream AW Confidential Podcast on Spotify, Apple and YouTube

The AW Confidential Podcast was created for anyone who wants to be informed, as well as, entertained. If you are looking for stories that will encourage you to live your best and truest self, break patterns and cycles that keep you stuck. This podcast is for you!

We want to blast the doors off of taboo subjects and talk about all of it. The host, Yvette Bodden, and guests talk about love, dating, generational trauma, Latinidad, authenticity, relationships, motherhood, career, intimacy, empowerment, beauty, cheating, and so much more.

We spotlight male and female guests from all walks of life, including public figures from the world of comedy, entertainment, journalism, television, beauty, and business. Pop-up visitors help to explore different perspectives on all things life. The takeaway will always be something to inspire anyone on the journey to greatness.

These episodes are sure to be anything but confidential. The intention is to spark conversation, educate, and be thought-provoking. Listen, as we put everything on the table, engaging in honest open, and real conversations.

Listen or watch episodes, now streaming on Spotify, Apple, and YouTube.

Protected content. 2023 awakened-woman.com

Empowerment Series: Television Host and News Personality, 2-Time Emmy Winning Reporter, Producer & Host, NBC’s NYLive and Today Show, Joelle Garguilo Shares Good News with AW

Joelle Garguilo is an Emmy Winning Reporter, Producer, and Media Personality seen on NBC’s New York Live and Today Show. The journalist is strikingly genuine, possessing a jovial attitude that makes her interview style delightful.

AW had the wonderful opportunity to sit down with the Television Host to discuss the feel-good stories we love so much, where she highlights the Big Apple’s unsung heroes. Men and women who inspire communities and make a difference in the lives of everyday New Yorkers. Joelle has an uncanny talent for delivering her stories with great empathy that encourages connection.

Her energy is infectious, making it easy to have a conversation. The mother of two cares about the people in her stories and wants us to know, that they matter. In a world, where our attention span is fleeting, I challenge you to take a moment to learn about the story behind Joelle’s “Why?”

As a Writer and Founder of my platform, I am learning that people want to be inspired. What have you learned from telling uplifting stories and giving a voice to the people doing great things? The world can be a depressing place but when you have a platform like the one I am on, NBC Universal, which is one of the biggest markets in New York City, it is a privilege. I will always love doing the celebrity interviews but I think it’s the everyday people that are so incredible. They don´t always get the spotlight, which is why it’s so important to fight for those stories. People love these stories. Don´t you want to watch something that helps those who deserve it? The power of what we do is amazing. It is an honor to be able to say”Hey, let’s put them on the show, offer an opportunity to highlight that small business.

During this process, what has been your biggest lesson as a human being? I have a big heart, I have always known that I care so much, and sometimes it gets me in trouble. It is a hard question to answer but I think the importance of speaking up, even when it’s not the most popular thing to do. If you believe in what you are doing then trust your heart. Trust your gut.

New Yorkers are perceived as cold and uncaring but we pull together when needed in big and small ways. You are using your platform to share the stories of people making a difference or embracing their greatness. Why do you share these particular profiles and what do you hope people will feel when they watch them on the show? You have to get out of your world because your world is not the only one out there. Every one of these stories has someone we can learn from, whether it’s their culture, upbringing, or experience. I know that you are not me and I am not you but if I can fully understand what others have lived, if I can walk in your shoes, it may help me understand what you’ve been through. When you are able to shine the light on others, you can inspire the world.

You are so good at what you do, which shows in the way you connect with the people in your stories. It is impossible to feel invisible in your presence. I am sure the subjects of your interview feel seen when in your presence. Have you ever been completely moved by someone, who couldn’t believe you wanted to share their story? Grandma Dawn is a woman who wants to make sure every child and adult knows how to read. She had the desire to share her love of books. Grandma’s Place, in Harlem, is a book and toy store that fueled the dream of a bookmobile, collecting 28,000 books, one for every child who is homeless. I remember going into the store and feeling it was special, and Grandma Dawn saying ¨I can´t believe I have a story.”

Everybody has a story. You have to separate your “What” from your Why.” Why do you do, what you do? Grandma Dawn was a child in the library, books were her escape in her life at the time. She knew what it was like to grow up with a parent who wasn’t around. Seeing the poverty in her area, she wanted to provide resources that would encourage the kids to do better.

In an interview with Bella Magazine, you said “You have learned empathy, understanding, and how to be a better human.” In my opinion, it makes you an effective and fantastic storyteller! What haven’t you learned yet, that you think would get you closer to the woman, mother, and human you hope to evolve into? I don´t know! I could use some help with time management, and getting out of my own head. But I think it’s a beautiful thing, sometimes it is OK, not to know. I am totally okay with that, just knowing that I want to get better.

You deliver stories that inspire us. What inspires you? Conversations like this! Knowing there are good people out there is inspiring. We can lift one another, the table is big enough for everyone.

I like to end our interviews with a positive message. Sometimes, life’s experiences can harden us. What words of inspiration or encouragement can you share with listeners who may be feeling cynical about life? Setbacks can actually be setups but you don’t realize it at the time, you are going through your mess. It can take a year or years to get where you want but I promise, if you can see them as setups, you are going to be better off!  I’ve gotten so stuck on certain things that have happened that I wasn’t letting other things happen in my career. The setbacks prepared me for the other Emmy and to do what I’m doing now but I had to let go of these setbacks, so like Elsa¨Let It Go¨

There is no better way than to end this interview with a quote from Joelle,¨Find that thing that is you and stay true to yourself.” She holds true to what she says, she found her gift and remains humble. AW is grateful to bring this story to its readers, as it is filled with goodness.

Life has countless challenges. We can easily be discouraged by the events that take place around us. So, how do you fight back the negativity? Spread the good news, help raise the voices of people who inspire, and make it your mission to choose a positive tone to cancel out the noise. Hopefully, Joelle’s work is a reminder that it’s not all bad news, out there!

You can watch the full interview with Joelle on the AW YouTube channel or listen to the AW Confidential Podcast found on Spotify, Apple Podcast, Anchor, and anywhere you find your podcasts.

To learn more about this amazing human, visit her Instagram, Twitter:@joellegarguilo, or http://www.joellegarguilo.com

This interview has been condensed for clarity.*

Protected content. Updated 2023 awakened-woman.com

Everything You Need to Know about Cuffing Season

The foliage is starting to show its palette of beautiful colors. Leaves are falling, and so are temperatures. Pumpkin Spice Latte season is here to help us keep warm. This time of year makes me want to cozy up with that special someone next to a fireplace while dressed in snug home attire. Getting comfortable with a good book or binge-watching a Netflix series are some of our favorite pastimes between October and Springtime.  The security of your guy or girl keeping you company is a completely normal feeling. But what happens when you are single and not paired up with anyone during the winter months?

Do you go about your business, happily in solitude, or nab a partner for the short interval? The answer to this question depends on who you ask. Plenty of men and women take pleasure in their “me” time. Others like to take up temporary real estate in a partner’s arms until flowers bloom.

Cuffing Season has arrived, if you are not in the know, this is the time when people look to couple up to get them through the chilly winter months.

Summertime is a great period for romantic flings. Singles are out and about, not only getting Vitamin D but spreading their social wings. October comes around, the days get shorter and nights colder.  Some people are greatly affected by the changes, triggering loneliness or depression. The upcoming festivities put pressure on those who receive invitations in the mail. Holiday office parties, family get-togethers, and friends asking, who will you bring to the next event. Showing up without a plus one at social gatherings has the potential to make people feel sad, hounded, or inadequate. One quick fix is to find brief relationships that fill the void for the moment. There will be a handful to stand the test of time but it’s not the intended purpose of a cuffing partner. Dating apps report an increase in activity around these months. Online sites such as Bumble and Hinge benefit from singles wanting to find their bae before yuletide.

These short-term partnerships have advantages and disadvantages. It’s nice to have a cuddle partner when the temperatures start descending. Being on the receiving end of affection is good for our health. Cuddling is great for relieving stress, lowering blood pressure, and giving us the warm fuzzies! Humans thrive from connection, it can relieve anxiety and depression, too. Our moods generally improve when we feel cared for, and hugs have the power to boost our level of happiness. Besides, denying the feel-good effect of an embrace is hard to do.

Seasonal relationships also have a downside. The lines of commitment can get blurred. The flings are not full of promise, therefore, investing in emotion and dreaming up a future is not the goal. It is an arrangement offering a convenient solution to spending all your time alone. Winters can be brutal and having a warm body to share the couch is enticing for some of us. No judgment, different things work for different people. However, I would refrain from taking a cuffing buddy and trying to turn him or her into a forever. Of course, you and your sweetie can survive the cuffing season. Anything can happen when it comes to a love connection but it would take effort on both sides, as well as, a desire to continue getting to know each other.  Honestly, I do not suggest using this type of linking up, as a way of seeking a healthy, stable relationship. Disappointment happens more often than not when partners’ expectations do not match up. How will you know? A conversation should take place to check each other’s expectations. Ignoring the talk can result in heartbreak or regret if the relationship goes wrong.

Navigating these relationships is possible, as long as you set boundaries for yourself and the chosen one. Setting basic guidelines protects both parties’ feelings. It helps to avoid an implosion when Spring comes around. It is smart to set the rules of attachment because exclusivity is not necessarily, a perk of this kind of partnership. Make sure to check in with yourself, and spend time with family and friends while continuing to enjoy independence. Assuming he is devoted to only you,  the affair is destined for the long haul, and holidays with his parents are happening are all thoughts that can be dangerous, unless you are both on that wavelength.

There is nothing wrong with enjoying company during cuffing season.  Having everyone on board with the terms of the tie-up is critical. The ideal way to go into your arrangement is with full transparency and eyes wide open! Societal norms convince people to believe the only way to have romantic relationships is to abide by the conventional or monogamous standards set by the mainstream. The reality of life has much more contrast because the world is made up of millions of people who hold different ideologies, values, and desires.

If you are considering participating in cuffing season, do so responsibly, aware, and with limits in place. Be open to the possibilities that each moment can bring while savoring human connection.

Photo Credit: Unsplash

 Protected content. Updated 2023 awakened-woman.com

Have You Lost Your Identity in a Relationship or Motherhood?

“Reclaiming my identity required a reboot. I wasn’t sure where to begin the process. But I knew the journey to my best self would include many questions and tasks to help untangle the mess, I made of myself. I began with these 4 basic but essential steps to begin a foundation for rebuilding. It worked for me, maybe it will help you.”

– Excerpt from ”A Journey to Becoming the Best Self”

Losing your identity in a relationship is one of the easiest things to do as a woman. Falling in love and wanting to be the best partner can lead to putting our needs last. As mothers and wives, it’s natural to have the desire to please those we love, sometimes to our detriment. There is no culpability to assign here because we do it out of love, dedication, and loyalty without asking. Happily relinquishing time, energy, and independence to build homes and relationships, in addition to raising children.

Years ago, I lost myself in marriage and motherhood. I feel grateful for having had a chance to experience an all-consuming love. Today, I have a better balancing act. The sacrifices of the past demonstrate my capacity to love. Although remarkable, it is no way to live an entire existence. I have learned nurturing the relationship with yourself is an integral part of overall wellness.

Losing my identity was not only frustrating. It became an inner struggle that I could not share with anyone. It felt as if I was on an island alone filled with shame. The inability to stand up for myself led to temporary but constant sadness. I knew I had to get out of the cycle for my sake and my child’s benefit. Being true to myself was the only way to get out of the pressure cooker, I created over time. There was no blame to pass because I designed the monster.

If you are battling with how to find yourself again after getting shuffled in the roles of life, there is good news. You can reclaim your identity at any point you decide you are ready. It is never too late to reinvent the wheel or come back home. What are the two most important things you should do to get started on this part of your journey? First, understand that you are not alone in what you are going through, this happens to plenty of women and even, some men. Let go of embarrassing feelings and guilt because this is part of the journey.

Secondly, we learn through living, therefore don’t be scared to feel. Try not to regret the things you have done. If there is something you want to do, now is a good time as any to give it a go! You find out who you are and what you are capable of, and step out of your comfort zone. Make room for activities, hobbies, and possibilities available to you. You may be surprised by what you discover about yourself during this period.

Losing ourselves, whether in motherhood or a relationship does not have to be the end all. Fight for a balance in your life. You are a whole person on your own. Someone who deserves to live a great life, a full one too. You are worthy of happiness, and there is so much joy in being living in your truth. Loved ones should see you – really, see you. More than mommy, spouse, wifey, or bae, you are a woman.

Don’t be afraid to ask yourself hard questions. As an empowered woman, you owe it to yourself to live out loud. The woman is still in there – somewhere. Go get her back!

Protected content. Updated 2023 awakened-woman.com

Photograph by The ABView Photography.

Empowerment Series: CEO and Founder of Golden Dream Beauty and Beauty Influencer, Ydelays Rodriguez Shares her American Dream with AW

According to a Nielsen report, our beauty and personal care industry grew to $25 billion in the second quarter of 2023 with no signs of slowing down and neither did Ydelays Rodriguez, the CEO and Founder of Golden Dream Beauty. The Venezuelan Influencer has connected with fans, growing her community to 1 million subscribers. The mom and entrepreneur’s YouTube channel has surpassed 60 million views, reflecting the power of her content.

This Latina beauty has been seen in Cosmopolitan, Women’s Health, Refinery 29, Buzzfeed, POPSUGAR, Despierta America, and Hip Latina. The road to success has not been easy but she takes it all in stride while enjoying the learning process of growing her brand. She loves her work and remains passionate about leaving a footprint in the beauty industry and the world.  Her website’s message is “Golden Dream Beauty is My American Dream,” and she has taken her dream from a vision to reality.

AW sat with the dynamo for an interview, where we talked about the journey to creating a brand, the lessons, fears, incorporating her son into her routine, and how she made it all come to life.

You were born and raised in Venezuela then moved to the US in 2012.  You started a YouTube channel to stay in touch with family back home. Afterward, you decide to pivot into sharing beauty tips. Now your videos are seen by millions! You have built a community of over 1 million followers in 10 years. Congratulations! How did you go from having a vision to creating your product? Can you share a bit about how that unfolded? The first time I visited Sephora, it was inspiring to see so many products. During the time I lived in Venezuela, the beauty section was quite limited. From a young age, I felt passionate about beauty but I never saw founders or people who looked like me in the marketing campaigns. It was frustrating because I did not want to look like anyone else. I’ve always been proud of my skin, and curves. All these things got me thinking about creating Golden Dream Beauty. I knew that I wanted to build a space where people could feel seen and represented.

I didn’t speak English when I first arrived in the US. If you watch my early YouTube videos, you will notice, they’re done in Spanish. I worked retail jobs to practice my English and learn how to be a good salesperson.  I wanted to incorporate passion and a solid strategy into my business. It was a big challenge but I love to learn and felt that I was for the task.

The American Dream is elusive to many, it is a long and difficult road. As a small business owner and Latina Founder, what has been the biggest hurdle and hardest lesson to learn, thus far? The hardest lesson to learn was not to stop when doors closed or I heard the word “No.” In the beginning, my thought was”People are going to love the product and say, Yes!” Then, I’d get a”No” and think, what do I do now? So, for me being able to learn acceptance, move forward after rejection, and become stronger and more prepared was life-changing. It has given me the ability to open the doors that I’ve wanted to enter. There were times I needed to redirect, and ask myself”Do I want this or should I take a different route?” It was hard, like all dreamers, you want things to happen the first time. We want it fast, right now but it’s not the way to build a successful business. We are seeing a lot of viral moments on TikTok and other platforms which could offer an amazing boost for sales. However, when you create something with the mentality to be sustainable for a long time, it can be a better way to create a good business or dream.

I love your product, Dream on Mascara! I’ve been trying to use more vegan products, when possible. I read you traveled to Milan with your entire life savings to get this creation off the ground. You took a significant risk! Can you share where your head was during this time? How did you come to your decision? In 2019, I invested all my savings for the first launch then during the pandemic, I developed the mascara. It took me about 2.5 years to come out with everything you are seeing and the products we just launched.  In 2023, I went to Milan to make sure everything was being done, right. Also, as a business owner, I wanted to give transparency. It was important for everyone to feel like they were there with me and be part of the process. Meeting the chemist, who is packing the orders, seeing people behind the scenes doing the work, and learning more were also, key.

I had the pleasure of meeting those working on the product. Our chemist expressed it was the best mascara, she created in her career. It took a long long to make a product that was clean and vegan. It is challenging to find the synthetic products that are also good for you. We don’t want to replace anything with something toxic, a better option is needed and that can get expensive. We want everything that we put on our face and body to be the best quality possible.

It was tough to invest all my savings into my dream but if you don’t believe in yourself, how do you expect others to believe in it? It starts with you. No one is going to come and change your life. You must get up first and try. Doors will open and you will learn so much. All entrepreneurs have a little crazy inside of us. Your idea may or may not work but you are doing it. It’s possible to grow, bet on yourself!

You bet on yourself, taking a chance on this dream. It takes guts to go out on your own. AW has claimed this year as Bigger, Better, Bolder! You are a mom, making moves and I know the journey comes with fears, insecurities, and sometimes doubt and guilt creeps in. What do you do to manage those monsters that we call to have, especially as moms? I make my son part of my routine. For example, if I have to pack orders, I sit him with me to learn about what I do and be proud of it. He enjoys it when we take orders to the post office and knows the name of the company and what we sell and do. As moms, we shouldn’t be too hard on ourselves. I love to focus on one thing at a time. For example, when I am spending quality time with him, there is nothing else. The goal is to separate things. If I feel like I can connect with him on a deeper level every day, make sure he is okay and he understands that I love him then I’m being a good mom.

AW likes to end interviews with a quote, mantra, or piece of advice. For anyone working on their American dream, Latinos fighting to make their footprint in the world. What advice can you share to inspire them to keep going? First, know when to ask for help. Our community is not used to asking for help. We try to put so much on my shoulders. It is something that I learned as recently, as this year. Surround yourself with people that believe in you. Don’t listen to the negative voices, continue to follow your passion. Do what you love and do not give up! Things stop happening the moment you give up.

AW is grateful to Ydelays for sharing her inspiring story with us. We need to have dreams, something to look forward to in life. However, it is not enough to think about the things we want to bring to fruition. Action is the best way to get to achieving dreams but even before all the pieces fall into place. You need a vision of what it is you want.

I am not exactly where I’d like to be, not yet. As an entrepreneur, there are plenty of days that I experience defeat but it only lasts a short while. The purpose is stronger than the wreck. Long ago, I dreamt about this exact moment. So, although, I have not accomplished everything, yet, some of the items on my wish list have materialized. A dream is only as good as its’ creator. Stick to yours, have patience, and believe that you are bigger than any doubts that present themselves.

Ydelays is proof of what is possible in this country. Determination has kept the ship on course and the conviction of her potential made it so that she does not stray too far from the wish planted in her heart to realize her American dream. Now, it is your turn!

Follow Golden Dream Beauty and Ydelays on Instagram, YouTube, and all her socials.

Listen to the AW Confidential Podcast on all streaming services. You can also watch this Confidential YouTube to enjoy all the side chats during the interview.

*This interview has been edited and condensed for clarity.

Protected content. 2023 awakened-woman.com

8 Books to Inspire your Fall Awakening

What was the last book you read and more importantly, how did it make you feel? Books are one of the major inspirations in my life. The idea of getting lost in a story or awakened by a fresh perspective is exactly what I need at times.

Winter is a great time to pick up a good read, re-visit a classic, and find inspiration with a new author. Whether you are enjoying the sandy beaches, green mountains, red canyons, or another safe haven of choice, readers can feel less lonely with a book in hand. Is it the comfort of words that keeps us afloat or the regained outlook from a higher being? Luckily, there is a book for everyone with a unique message that resonates. It was projected that in 2022, the global publishers’ market would generate close to $100 billion. A sign that we are still reading!

The process of choosing the right book is different for everyone. Some pick books depending on what is needed at the time, while others have specific interests. My preference has much to do with what fills my soul during life’s challenges or the truth I seek at that moment. If you are looking for inspiration during your journey of self-discovery this season, here are a few recommendations that may encourage you as you pave the way to greatness.

A Journey to Becoming the Best Self, Yvette Bodden. Of course! I have to recommend my self-help/memoir. This is my story of heartbreak, financial hardship, co-parenting, and depression but it’s also filled with hope. We have choices, once we understand that, it widens the lens, making all things possible. Life can change for the better. 
More Myself: A Journey, New York native, Alicia Keys shares the story of how embracing life’s truths helped her become a better person. I immersed myself in the memoir, while she openly shared her experiences as a woman, daughter, friend, wife, and artist. Most of us have individual insecurities, personal trauma, and our own “stuff” but if we listen to our inner voice, it can awaken us to the beauty of self-worth.
What I Know For Sure, Oprah Winfrey offers readers a peek into her life, as well as, provides insightful and sage lessons to empower readers.
The Soul of a Woman, Chilean writer, Isabel Allende walks readers through her journey by sharing her life and choices – even the bad ones that fuel the vehicle of empowerment she continues to be today.
The Gifts of Imperfection, Brenee Brown discusses authenticity and worthiness. This book is a gift that every woman should read!
You Are a Badass, Jen Sincero has a no-nonsense, unfiltered way of shaking up your soul. She gives us a shot at real life and tells us how to change our lives by letting go of self-sabotaging beliefs and behaviors.
Eat, Pray, Love, Elizabeth Gilbert writes about a woman’s spiritual quest for forgiveness, self-love, joy, and pleasure.
The Alchemist, Paulo Coehlo tells the story of a boy, Santiago who finds the gift of wisdom. This story reminds us that “When you really want something to happen, the whole universe will conspire so that your wish comes true.” 

The world of books is a feast for readers looking to be educated, enlightened, inspired, and entertained. Millions of books are published each year, as more writers take advantage of self-publishing. There is a book for every bookworm, a wonderful outlet for anyone who wants it. 

There is an undeniably large number of benefits tied to reading such as improved memory, focus, vocabulary, and language development. Reading has been a beautiful and necessary resource to me, as a writer. My craft is constantly improving because of the different authors and genres ventured into throughout the years. My daughter eats up book after book, periodically, taking on two at a time.

I am a big believer that reading allows our mind to expand and broadens our horizons, exposing us to a variety of ideas. Human beings’ curiosity about people, life, and the world is fed by experience but can also be satisfied through the universe of books.

Hopefully, you include a good read as part of your Fall season self-care plan to inspire, empower, and encourage your journey to an awakening. 

What is your favorite book? Share the title in the comments!

Protected content. 2023 awakened-woman.com

How to Step into Your Power at Any Stage of Life

For centuries, the expectation has been for us to fall back, stay in our lane, or sit pretty. The curse of inequality continues to loom in a variety of ways, hindering greater progress for women in society. We have been conditioned to play small, a frame of mind that has been ingrained in the fabric of a handful of cultures including ours. Wives, mothers, girlfriends, and professional women face distress from the pressure of trying to fit in a box. The unrealistic expectations have led some to believe they don’t have power.

One of the most difficult things a woman will do in her lifetime is make the choice to step into her power. Part of the reason for the difficulty is the courage it takes to own your truth, set boundaries, and allow yourself to be seen. Old-world influences affect how women are perceived. The belief that her value is diminished by imperfections is still very much alive. In certain parts of the world, it is assumed a woman’s mistakes and so-called failures lessen her worth. It isn’t uncommon for guilt to back us into a corner. Feelings of shame can silence us but quietness is one of the biggest ways we give power away.

Stepping into your potential can happen at any time if you’re willing to confront the challenges that come with going against the grain.  There will be moments when you question if it’s worth the effort. The work demands that you gain a stronghold on your identity, otherwise, you can fall right back into a comfort zone. You must be ready to give up mainstream standards, in order to free yourself from the limitations set by others. You need to trust that you know what is best for you. Owning your power also requires a large amount of confidence.  In many instances, a woman will need to ignore conditioned beliefs, and instead align herself with personal truths, a process that is oftentimes, quite painful.

Understanding that individual power is the key to authenticity, stronger self-esteem, and absolute happiness is life-changing. Living on your own terms means being unapologetic about who you are. Liberating, isn’t it? But as priceless as it is to show up as yourself, it presents countless hurdles. We use lots of filters to hide our fears, insecurities, and all the things we think people may not like about us. Many women spend a lifetime covering up the cracks without grasping the true beauty in their uniqueness. There’s only one you, so accept your experiences, including blunders because these are the lessons that brought you to where you are today. Hopefully, you have arrived at a place, where you’re ready to become the woman you’re meant to be.

For years, the role of chameleon came easy to me. I spent years trying to meet assumptions that would make others happy. The exercise left me without a clue, of who I was. For years, I didn’t feel like I was good enough, fearful of my reflection in the mirror. The journey has been ongoing but finally, I found a place that holds space for the real me. There is tremendous freedom that comes from standing in our truth. 

If you have not yet, arrived at your moment, this is your call to step out into the light. Take hold of the power that comes with owning who you are or reclaim it if you temporarily lose yourself. Hopefully, the following tips can help you get started!

Take Ownership: Own who you are. Embrace your truths and everything you are feeling. There is nothing better than being honest and open. Let your true colors show every day. Your authenticity will draw you to the right tribe. Be clear on your intentions and boundaries. Decide for yourself what you want and deserve without fear of using your voice to let others know your worth. Taking this major step will help you choose the best partner, job, and people to surround yourself with long term. Once you do the heavy lifting, work to live in alignment with your values and beliefs to encourage balance in your world.

Don’t Be Afraid to Use Your Gifts: Build self-awareness to help nurture the best parts of yourself. Figure out what your needs are and move toward giving yourself those things. These will not necessarily be tangible items, they can mean emotional, spiritual, or physical fulfillment. Secondly, use your intuition, the inner voice can be a compass in your decision-making process. Incorporate the voice of reason to empower you on the path to becoming your best self. Your gut does not steer you wrong.

Allow Space for Reflection, Regrouping, and Grace: Always make room to contemplate life. Are you where you want to be? Are you happy with the person you have become? What areas of life can you improve on? Spend time considering the world around you and how the pieces in your life work in harmony.

Don’t be afraid to create the life you envision. Your needs can change during any station of life, therefore, re-evaluate from time to time, I highly recommend it. Everyone needs time to reshuffle. Life changes and people do, too. 

Lastly, practice kindness with yourself. Sometimes, we forget to give ourselves grace. Perfection is nonexistent, so when the media tries to tell you the opposite, remember that everyone has a history. Learn to forgive yourself. No one gets it right on the first try.

Lastly, age is nothing but a number, especially when it comes to stepping into our power. Whether you are 25 or 65, you have the ability to design a new blueprint for your life. If the foundation is solid, we can always rebuild the structure. The human spirit is relentless with an impetuous will. You have all the power. Do not fool yourself into believing that you don’t have any. Walk into your potential and show the world what you’re made of!

Photography credit: Unsplash

Protected content. 2023 awakened-woman.com

Empowerment Series: Dominican Venezuelan Actress, Isadora Ortega Shares “Another Love Story,” Abusive Relationships and Mental Health

One of the things, I most enjoy about doing this podcast, writing, and interviewing is how much I learn in the process. Having the ability to share lessons continues to be a gift that fills me with gratitude.

AW does not shy away from the strong subject matter. We believe difficult conversations that shed light on serious topics are essential. One of the best ways to help one another is to openly talk about the hard stuff, too.

The National Coalition Against Domestic Violence reports that on a normal day, over 20,000 telephone calls from all over the US come through to the domestic violence hotline. More than 10,000,00 women and men are abused by an intimate partner in a single year. We can’t keep ignoring the numbers, this is a huge issue for society.

This was a difficult dialogue due to its serious nature but necessary.

In the film, Another Love Story, the character, Miriam, (played by Isadora Ortega) suffers domestic abuse at the hands of her partner, Marc. The man walks into her life, as a knight and shining armor until he becomes a monster. During our conversation, we covered emotional and physical abuse, mental health, toxicity, and red flags in relationships. The talented Latina also shares the personal experience that inspired her to do the movie.

The Dominican Venezuelan Actress does not shy away from speaking her truth, as she shared her thoughts on what it means to be part of this film. The Executive Producer takes us on the journey of Miriam Ramos. A woman who falls in love with a man who is successful, charming, passionate, and extremely generous. The outpouring of love from the perfect partner is what most girls would dream of until they see his dark side.

Another Love Story is an award-winning film that has won accolades for Best Director, Brandon Morson, and Best Actress, Isadora Ortega at the 2021 New York International Film Awards. The title was also selected as Best Feature Film at the 2022 Gold Movie Awards.

AW had the opportunity to sit with Isadora for a powerful conversation to bring awareness to the troubling reality.

Another Love Story deals with a tough topic. We see, how its lead character, Miriam, falls head over heels for Marc. He seems like the perfect man until he shows a dark side. His anger turns to rage, triggering repeated episodes of emotional and physical abuse. This is a powerful story. I believe abuse happens more often than we realize. Why was it important to tell this story?  The story is based on true events. My childhood best friend was killed 5-6 years ago. Many pieces of the film resemble her story, so it was important to bring light to it. Sadly, he took her life and then his own.

When it happened, I began to research and realized how big of a social issue this is but not getting enough attention. In public, the perfect couple then behind closed doors total chaos. I have family members who reached out to say, “This happened to me.” We see these situations and assume the person can leave at any time. It isn’t always that simple because there is a lot of manipulation and mental abuse. People can experience feelings of unworthiness. If they leave, no one else will love them, and there is also, shame behind the ordeal.

I wanted to highlight the problem, as well as, let people know, you can escape domestic abuse and live your life. The moment a decision is made to leave, you are in real danger. Many agencies have resources available to help those who need them.

Possessive, controlling, suggesting immediate introduction to friends and family circle, the overwhelming outpouring of love, alienation from your support network, and lavish gifts that all take place in a short span of time. In my opinion, these can be red flags but we don’t always see things for what they are, instead, we prefer to see what we want. Any other warning signs we should look for in an abuser? We did a screening, where I was approached about what took place with our male lead’s character. Audience members connected with the red flags, and the story was familiar. Marc’s character infiltrated himself so deep into her life that no one else mattered, he became the center of her universe. Abuse happens in our circle, so it’s important to see the signs.

Would you agree that Marc’s character used sex as a weapon of passion, as a tool for control? Sex is one of the most powerful drugs there is! Feelings are involved, and chemistry is there which can blur the lines for anyone not clear on who they are and what they deserve. “I hit you then we have sex. I speak to you like trash then we have sex.”  It may feel like sex can alleviate anything that covers things up. But ask yourself, “Would someone that truly loves hurt you?”

I worked with a Private Investigator who works with people who have experienced abuse.

Possible red flags to look for in a toxic relationship would include:

If the romantic partner is trying to block your social media.Create chaos that keeps you away from your friends and family. Alienating you from those who support you emotionally, mentally, and spiritually.Keeping you from having a means of transportation, so you don’t have the means to get around on your own.Speaking down to you. He tells may use phrases like “Who is going to love you more than me? You cannot do better than me.”

These all fall under domestic abuse, the physical aspect of the torment would be domestic violence and it happens mostly to women but men, too.

I can’t stress how critical it is to understand that survivors of this type of violence, suffer similar trauma as people who go to war because their brain is damaged in the same way. It has devastating consequences and police don’t want to get involved, unfortunately.

When you feel like you are not enough, it affects every aspect of your life. Do you believe this strongly ties to being a victim of abuse? This goes deeper than we realize. How we see ourselves, shapes our experiences. If I come out of a toxic relationship, my job is to find counsel, and speak to someone to find out the “Why?” Knowing yourself helps do things differently in the next relationship. I think we should all get some therapy, as human beings.

Did you learn anything after working on this project?  Laws are not well structured when it comes to domestic abuse. In fact, they are flawed, old, and not sufficiently enforced to protect anyone. Even a restraining order does not have a lot of protection. Abusers don’t face real consequences. They receive a slap on the wrist and use a revolving door, to continue the abuse. In one of those instances, they are out, abusers kill their victims.

There is a hotline for victims but there should be much more help available. Realistically, it has become worse after the pandemic, victims became prisoners in their own homes.

In the final scene, Mimi’s friend says to her  “This is not your fault.” What did she mean and why did she say it to the victim? An abuser, a narcissist, will convince their victim that anything they do or the shortcomings they have is their fault. If they cheat, hit you, or find any flaw in their character – it becomes your fault. You have to know it is not – it’s them.

We like to end interviews with advice, quotes, or mantras to help the community. What advice do you have for women who may be in a similar predicament as Miriam? It could be you or me. This can happen to any one of us depending on our mental state. Nurture your spirit with positive, good energy to help you recognize that you are not deserving of harm.

When you know who you are and what you deserve you don’t allow anyone to hurt you. Men and women need to ask themselves about their mental health. If you see monsters everywhere, there are ways to find help. There is no shame in getting help. Life is hard, and asking for help is not something to be ashamed of. We all need a little help, sometimes.

National Domestic Violence Hotline, Telephone: 1-800-799-7233

You can find out more about Isadora by visiting Instagram @lablacklatina.

Watch the full interview with Isadora on the AW YouTube channel or listen to the AW Confidential Podcast found on Spotify, Apple Podcast, Anchor, and everywhere you find your podcasts.

This interview has been condensed for clarity.*

Protected content. 2023 awakened-woman.com

 

Empowerment Series: Dominican-Puerto Rican, Award-Winning Journalist, Creator, Television Host, Tinabeth Pina Shares her Unstoppable Drive with AW

Growing up, I did not see anyone like me on film or television. Change takes time and Latinos have finally earned a place in the industry but not without challenges. Despite this progress, we are still fighting for spaces where we can share our stories.

Tinabeth Piña saw a void in the industry and decided to do something about it. The Emmy Award-winning Multimedia Journalist has a long list of accomplishments. She has worked behind the scenes at prominent networks including Fox, ABC, A&E, The History Channel, Oxygen, and PBS. Currently, she is the Host of CUNY TV’s Latinas, where she profiles women impacting the world differently.

The creator is also responsible for PBS’ Globe Scholars, an Emmy-nominated travel show that follows students’ journeys abroad. The author of “Cha-Ching” is well-traveled herself. She has visited over 50 countries and is still going strong.

AW had the opportunity to sit down with Tinabeth during the beginning of National Hispanic Heritage Month. I’m sure you will be as inspired, as I was when you read her story of determination. She is proof that an unstoppable drive can accomplish anything!

You created a foundation, received an education, and paid your dues behind the scenes at some of the biggest television networks. For many, that may have been enough but you continued to challenge yourself. Do you recall a turning point, a moment when you realized that you were meant for more? I don’t know if it was so much,  as a turning point. It has been a way of life for me. I remember, while I was in Kindergarten, I was called the “N” word by a classmate. I didn’t know what the word meant and was confused when told, I was Black. The words upset me because I didn’t understand what was happening.

I go home and tell my mom the story.  She explains that as a   who looks physically different in a predominantly white school, I’d have to excel in everything thing I do because being the “other” would be used against me. She didn’t want that to happen to me. It was her way of getting me to do well in school and in all the things I took on. This has been wired within me since I was 5 years old, therefore, I did not have an a-ha moment.

Doing well means something different to everyone. For me, it means accomplishing whatever I set my mind to do and being at peace with it.

Oftentimes, we don’t believe in our potential for greatness. Our parents come to the United States from other countries and encounter endless limitations which can cripple our faith or fool us into thinking the bigger dreams are not for us. You are realizing your dreams with a successful career that has a purpose and you are traveling around the world! Have there been any doubts or insecurities you had to navigate during your journey? I think there are doubts and insecurities for everyone, not necessarily geared at me, per se, because I am Latina. Some of these doubts, anyone else can have too. Are you pretty enough? Are you smart enough? Are you sufficient for anything? We all have doubts but I think it’s about whether or not you allow it to rule your path or dictate what you do going forward. It’s also important to remain positive and surround yourself with positive people because there is no benefit to negativity, it only dims your light.

How do you shift your mindset to help you through the hurdles you face? One thing I have done since I was a kid is set goals. Sometimes, they’re small goals but once achieved they make you feel good, regardless of the measure of it. You continue to set and accomplish them, there can be ones that are inconceivable to someone else. For example, Globe Scholars was one of these goals. I wanted to create a show where I travel with students. I wasn’t sure that I could do something like that but it didn’t stop me from pursuing it.

Setting and achieving goals can give you a sense of purpose but also, fulfillment. It can help build the confidence to keep moving forward. Proving to yourself that you can do it will lift you!

One of the reasons, I do this work is because I believe sharing our stories encourages connection, healing, and inspiration. My dream is for my stories to become part of a legacy that offers hope for generations to come. Do you ever think about your legacy? Can you share what you would like yours to be? “I came, I saw and I tried my very best.” It is something I’d like to be known for, always trying and never taking no for an answer. You don’t know what you can do until you try whether in your career, professionally, or personally. Try and if you fail, you tried. You will never be left wondering.

Talking about inspiration. Recently, you executive produced a 6-part series called Hip Hop Subway: The L-Line. Can you share a bit about the project and where we can find it? It is a series celebrating the 50th anniversary of Hip-Hop but from the Latino lens, thus the “L-line.” Elena Romero has written two books on fashion in Hip-Hop and is well-versed in all things hip-hop. Tuffy Questell used to host a quintessential New York show called, “Video Music Box.” He is an alumnus of one of the CUNY schools and gets on well with Elena. I wanted my hands in this special but did not feel I had the expertise. They were perfect for the role of Co-Hosts!

There are so many elements to Hip-Hop. If you are familiar with the genre, you know there is an aspect of Graffiti, Activism, Rhyming, DJ-ing, B-Boy/B-Girl, Dancing, Photography, and Media. After brainstorming, I broke it down into a 6-part series and presented the project to the Executive Director. We shot it in July, the first episode premiered on August 11th, the 50th Anniversary of Hip-Hop.  The next episode aired on August 25th and the next four will be released over the next four months – September, October, November, and December. You can see it on CUNY-TV in New York City. If you are not located in New York, it will be streaming on YouTube after premiering on CUNY-TV.

I can’t let you go without letting you share a bit about the magazine show, “Latinas” and program,” Globe Scholars.”  Studying abroad is an important, life-changing experience. I thought it would be great for students of color to see students like themselves traveling abroad. “Globe Scholars” has followed the experiences of students who have gone to Cuba, South Korea, and Spain. The last one did not have students of color but included kids of the same age, who traveled to different countries and went to school at the same time. This has been a dream of mine and can be seen on the PBS channel.

My thesis in college was about the underrepresentation and misrepresentation of Latinos in mainstream television which was well-received. I always wanted to create a show that was in the English language for Latino audiences. When I was about to leave CUNY-TV, I got a proposal to do the show I wanted, and I stayed. We already had a show “Nueva York” which is for the Spanish-speaking audience in New York City. I did not want to step on their toes and purposely made this a niche show. I chose Latina women in particular to profile. I want to point out that even though it is called “Latinas“, the show is not only for Latinas. Anyone can watch this show and get something out of it. We are now going into our sixth season and the PBS channel has picked it up.

I am very fortunate, to set out to do something, whatever it is, and get it done.

We like to end AW interviews with a quote, mantra, or advice to help inspire listeners. You have taken the world by storm, realizing every vision you’ve had. You have this limitless attitude that a lot of people don’t possess. What words can you offer to encourage those who may not feel they can realize their dreams? First of all, thank you. I do what I do because I love it. Honestly, even though I am on television a lot, I never think anyone notices because it’s a small channel. I appreciate your words. I’ll say, “You have to keep on, keeping on.” If somebody tells you “No.” Do not accept that as the final answer. I’m not sure if it’s because I was an athlete growing up, my parents instilled certain attributes, plus there was sibling rivalry. All those things combined led me to where I am today.

The best I could say is what I said at my college graduation. There are three types of people in this world. Some people watch things happen, others make things happen, and the rest say, “What happened?” (Que pasó?) What kind of person do you want to be? I am the type of person that makes things happen. I don’t want to be reactive, I want to be purposeful and make things happen for myself. You have to put yourself out there but I understand, it isn’t for everyone. At the end of the day, no one will do things for you but you.

In the words of Tinabeth “Who do you want to be?” We have more power than we realize and can use it at any time to create the life we want for ourselves. She believed that she could then she did it. You can too!

AW is grateful for the opportunity to interview such an empowered Latina. Seeing women like her in front of the camera, and sharing inspiring stories is poignant. I believe seeing people who look like us, doing things we dream about can help perpetuate a generation of doers. She inspires us to realize our dreams.

We live in a world of great uncertainty and while society seems to be regressing in some areas, we have seen increments of change. According to the 2020 Census data, it is estimated that we account for close to 19% of the American population. The Latino population in the United States has surpassed the 60 million mark.  It is our time, representation has become more important than ever. It matters who tells our stories and represents us. We no longer have to accept less than, while being made to feel invisible. Every human being wants to be seen and acknowledged. Having examples like Tinabeth makes it just a little easier to walk the path less traveled.

Listen to this episode of the AW Confidential Podcast on all streaming services and watch it on our YouTube channel to enjoy all the side chats during the interview.

You can learn more about Tinabeth on Instagram@tinabethpena, @latinascunytv, and @globescholarstv

Stream Globe Scholars on Globescholarstv.org and Latinas, as well as, Hip Hop Subway: The L-Line at tv.cuny.edu and YouTube.

*This interview has been edited and condensed for clarity.

Protected content. 2023 awakened-woman.com

Empowerment Series: Puerto Rican-Dominican Actress, Writer, Comedian & Author, “Legitimate Kid,“ Aida Rodriguez Shares her Truth with AW

We’ve all heard stories about the Latino upbringing. Generally, our parents tend to have overprotective practices. Abiding by their commandments is the best way to stay in good graces and out of trouble. I was raised in a relatively strict home but as we got older, our mom and dad loosened up the reigns. Despite the easing up on house rules, some things never changed.

One of my mother’s favorite sayings was “Lo que pasa en la casa, se queda en casa.” Meaning, that whatever happens at home, stays at home. She valued the truth and expected honesty from everyone, even if sharing it, hurt. However, that didn’t mean we had permission to talk about our business outside the home.

Aida Rodriguez has broken every one of my mom’s rules! “No tiene pelo en la lengua,” (No mincing of words), as mom would say. I fell in love with her content because she tells it like it is while remaining true to who she is every step of the way. I first interviewed the fearless Latina in 2021 for her comedy special “Fighting Words.” I remember walking out of her dressing room feeling, truly seen. Anyone who knows her will tell you that she is one of the real ones.

She has a new memoir “Legitimate Kid,” that promises to give you all the feels. It is a collection of essays about the ups and downs of her life. She shares the journey from personal setbacks to success and everything in between! Her book has been described as “endearing, shocking and ultimately, life-affirming.”

AW sat down with Aida for a heartfelt, genuine, unfiltered conversation. Things got real, as we spoke about each other’s upbringing, generational trauma, our mothers, colorism, and more. I am humbled and proud to share this interview with you. We hope that it empowers you to break the emotional shackles that hold you back from living a life of immeasurable greatness.

You tell your truth unapologetically, which is difficult for most people. You share it on social media, in interviews, and in your comedic skits. I have never seen you shy away from an honest answer. Has that ever gotten you in trouble? No, although with this book, I think about how it will affect my mother. I adore her, she is everything to me but I’m also entitled to my own story. I think a lot of times when we are told “Lo que pasa en la casa, queda en casa,” it was to protect other people but we were impacted by the mistakes made.

I was always a private person until “Fighting Words” when I shared the journey of meeting my father and wrote this book. I kept thinking about the younger me, they used to call me “Little Aidita.” This is me showing up for her and others, whether they are boys, girls, or nonbinary. There are many of them out there experiencing the same things, I did. I want to release them and also, a little Aidita. I’m sure my dad is not excited about the story of him getting beat up but I wanted to share the story of colorism that runs deep and I experienced growing up.

I was very gentle in this book because there was so much more that could have been shared about being sexually abused and raped. I did not include any of it in the book. There were plenty of stories spared, the focus is legitimacy. I wanted the story to be fluid and stay in line with my thesis.

You have written this memoir, “Legitimate Kid.” Can you tell us what it’s about and why you gave it this title? The journey of my book began at 8 years old when I was in 3rd grade. A girl called me a bastard because I didn’t have my father’s last name. Immediately, I could feel the shame around it because the other kids were laughing at me. This set me on a mission to explore and find out why the name-calling. Learning at the age of 12 years old about what happened broke me. I’ve been trying to put myself back together ever since.

I think many people are struggling with legitimacy and validation. It could be about your father’s last name, you being the darkest one in your family, being an immigrant, having an accent, or transitioning, whatever makes you question your validity. People are telling you that you are not legitimate – not enough. I wanted to explore this within myself, why did I feel less than or unworthy of great things? I needed to go back to that specific wound and understand where these feelings came from. It was important to tell this story and help others feel seen. Let them know, they are not alone and validation does not come from outside, it comes from within.

This book and your comedy tell so many of your truths. I wrote a memoir that was published in 2019. I understand how difficult it is to share our truth with the world. What was the toughest truth to share? If I’m honest, the hardest part of the book is sharing the stuff about my mother without demonizing her. My mother was a child when she had me. I was raised to respect and revere her. I had to find the balance between being able to say “This was wrong and not okay,” and at the same time, allowing her humanity and reality. I don’t want anyone attacking or negatively speaking of her. I will fight for her until the very end. She is the queen of my world. 

My mother and grandmother were born into trauma. This was about understanding that she made mistakes but so did I. While I was pointing a finger at her, my kids were taking notes of my mistakes. So, writing about her was the toughest because I love her so much.

Latinos, particularly Dominicans, learn from a young age that anything that happens at home or within the family is not to be shared with outsiders. You went and wrote a book about your story! Have you received backlash or pushback from any family members? No, I told my truth. This is my version of the story told from my perception. I never set out to demonize anyone but there are people in this book that did horrible things to me, and there’s no way to spin it. There is no justification for pushing a woman out of a moving car or abusing someone. All of us make mistakes but we must be accountable for what we do. I’m not concerned about pushback at all. 

I watched an interview where you shared that you lost two very important people in your life. Your uncle, who raised you and your grandmother, both within two months of each other. Around the same time you received a call from Last Comic Standing, a huge opportunity. You had to go out and make people laugh while grieving. It was one of the most difficult things that you’ve ever had to do but you believe that were with you to push you to get it done. This was the moment that everything changed for you. In that same interview, you said “The more we tell our stories, the more power, we have.” You are sharing your story with the world. What do you think your uncle and grandmother would say about this book? My grandmother was very regal. She was one of the classiest people I ever met, so classy and big on etiquette. She would say “You don’t speak on those things” but she was always the person who inspired and empowered me, anyway. So, she’d say “That’s not for me but if it’s how you’re going to do it then we gonna ride.” 

My uncle never had anyone stand up for him. Writing about him was like giving him his place. Putting him back on his throne. Society told him he was not worthy. I think he would appreciate it. They both knew how much I loved them. Anything I do is to love and help others, which is what they did. I believe they would be ok with it.

What do you hope the takeaway will be from people who read your book? I want people to be released from shame.  Shame is shackling, they are handcuffs that keep us in a place and silence us. It keeps people in a place that does not allow us to soar, where we belong. We are so weighed down by guilt and shame. It is relevant in our community of Latinos, Latiné, and Latinx who migrated from other countries. I would love people to find themselves in this story and release themselves. See how “I am all right. I did it. I’m on the other side, they can do it too.” It is my dream for people to realize they are legitimate and belong. No matter your last name, the color or texture of your skin and hair, where you came from, language spoken, or migration. You belong here, are deserving, and have been sent here to do your work. You are valuable. 

We like to end AW interviews with a quote, mantra, or advice to inspire listeners. For anyone afraid to share their truth, can you offer words of encouragement? Those who do not dare or think to use their voice in their lives? First of all, you are worthy. Oftentimes, when you feel you can’t tell your story, it’s because you don’t feel anyone will listen or care. You matter.

There are a few mantras that I use. “The Universe agrees with a made-up mind.” Once you make a decision. God, the Universe, or whatever you believe in, conspires with you to make it happen. 

“One can never consent to creep when one feels an impulse to soar.” – Hellen Keller. There is a fire in you that can lead to purpose. If you choose not to ignore and follow it, you never know what can happen. Do not allow yourself or anyone to make you feel small, including yourself when you feel the impulse to soar. I encourage you to fly, you deserve to be amongst the eagles.

AW is incredibly thankful to Aida for sharing her truths with us and the world. I knew going into our conversation, it was going to take all of me not to cry. I’m happy to report there were no breakdowns but moments of reflection and empowerment. Thank you, Aidita, for allowing yourself to shine and believing you could fly. We all have a scared little boy or girl inside of us. I hope that others will see themselves in our stories and build the confidence to create the life of their dreams.

In Aida’s words, “If your perception is always through the negative lens that is a miserable life.”

Let’s rise above our pain and live our truth.

To learn more about Aida, or tour dates, visit funnyaida.com. Pre-orders are important for authors, please purchase your copy from your local independent bookstore to support small businesses.

Listen to this episode of the AW Confidential Podcast on all streaming services and watch it on our YouTube channel to enjoy all the side chats during the interview.

*This interview has been edited and condensed for clarity.

Protected content. 2023 awakened-woman.com