Catherine Pearlman's Blog, page 13

Firstborn Leaves for College and Low Self-Esteem for 01/06/2017

Dear Family Coach: My firstborn son is about to graduate high school and head off to college on a scholarship. We have always been so close, and although I knew this day was coming, I am inconsolably sad. I feel myself pulling away because I can't stand the idea of losing him. Do you have any tips on how to shake this horrible feeling and still be a mom without overdoing the care packages and text messages? — Clueless

Dear Clueless: You aren't losing your son. He is just growing up. That's not the same thing. While he may be moving out, you can still secure a close relationship with him, maybe one that is even deeper and on a more grown-up level.

Updated: Fri Jan 06, 2017

Kids Who Hate Reading and Avoiding College Talk for 12/31/2016

Dear Family Coach: My wife and I are constantly encouraging our children, who are 7 and 11 years old, to read anything, but especially chapter books. Our latest strategy is to reward them for finishing a series of books. For example, when my son finished the entire "Harry Potter" series he was rewarded with a Nerf gun. Is this the wrong approach? And if so, how should we try to ease our way out of it? — Bookworm Dad

Dear Dad: Reading is absolutely important to the academic success of your children. But more importantly, reading a good book is one of the truest pleasures available to everyone for free. It certainly makes sense to encourage good reading habits. The problem is that some children struggle to find the joy in reading. Some kids' skills make reading arduous. Other children are over programmed lacking the time to slow down with a good book. And still, other kids just find books to be too boring. The good news is there are many ways to combat all of these issues.

Updated: Sat Dec 31, 2016

Pet Regret and Gun Safety for 12/30/2016

Dear Family Coach: My son has a new best friend. I recently learned that his friend's family keeps guns in their home. I'd like to discuss the issue, but I'm worried I'll freak out because I am not a fan of guns. How can I ensure my son's safety so he can still visit their home without it becoming awkward? — Afraid of Guns

Dear Afraid: Asking about guns shouldn't be awkward. If the parents are responsible gun owners, they will have a clear safety plan in place and won't mind sharing it with you. Start by addressing your concerns without beating around the bush. Flat-out ask whether there are any guns in the house. Find out what the family does to guarantee that the kids do not have access to them. Ask who has access. Ask whether the guns and ammunition are stored separately, and whether the guns are locked up unloaded. The parents should have equal concern for the safety of their children. If they don't, plan a play date at your home instead.

Updated: Fri Dec 30, 2016