Helene Lerner's Blog, page 172

Grete Eliassen: Free to Fly

Most people would be terrified by the thought of jumping off cliffs at racing speeds. But for Grete Eliassen, it’s just part of the job. The 26-year-old professional freeskier has been hitting the slopes since the age of two, and it’s a passion that has clearly stuck. 

“Both of my parents are avid skiers and love to be outside, so teaching my siblings and I to ski was just a given,” Grete says. “They pushed me to try everything, but when I was 12 I decided I wanted to focus on skiing.”

Soon after, Grete and her family moved back to her father’s native country, Norway, where she was named the Norwegian SL National Champion and selected for the Norwegian Ski Team. However, Grete was ready for the next challenge. She longed for more freedom in the sport, and so she made the transition from racing to freeskiing. 

“My first freeskiing event was a high school Big Air during my school’s annual ski day,” Grete recalls. “I just remember doing the biggest tail grab ever and everyone talking about it at school the next day. I did not connect with many people at my school because not many girls played sports, but once they saw me on that ski day, they finally understood what I was about.” 

Grete hasn’t looked back since making her freeskiing debut. She has won the US Open four times, and has captured two gold and silver medals at the Winter X Games. Her family, she says, is what keeps her head level through it all. “My family and fiancé are my support network. They have been behind me since day one – not only do they love to watch me ski, but they love skiing as well. I would not be where I am today without them.” 

Though she possesses an array of medals and has starred in multiple ski films, perhaps her greatest accomplishment is setting a world record in the Woman’s Hip-Jump. In 2010 Grete reached speeds of 60 mph, hit a 30 foot “hip” feature, and soared more than 31 feet in the air. No other woman has even come close. 

When she’s not in the air, Grete can often be found mentoring future generations of female athletes. “The most rewarding aspect of my career has been getting involved with the Women’s Sports Foundation,” Grete says. Her late mentor and friend Sarah Burke introduced her to the foundation, and she has since worked to improve the opportunity for girls to play sports. 

“I would love to continue to work in sports,” Grete says of her plans once she retires from competing. She recently graduated from the David Eccles School of Business with a degree in Business Marketing. “My dream is to one day be able to turn on the television and be able to watch women’s sports whenever I want. I will still watch men’s sports, but it would be nice if there was equal coverage.”

Though a knee injury is sidelining her from this year's X Games in Aspen, she will soon resume her training as she prepares for the 2014 Winter Olympics. Grete is currently slated to compete in Sochi, Russia, as a member of the US Freeskiing Team for Slopestyle. 

For coverage with other Olympic athletes, be sure to read our interview with gold medalist Kayla Harrison and track-and-field star Carmelita Jeter.

–Lindsay Putnam

How to Become a Strategic Business Partner

In my last blog, I spoke about the importance of collaboration and partnership to successfully achieve a shared vision. Today, I want to build on this notion by defining a strategic business partner. What does this mean, and why is it important? And how does one become a strategic business partner in the eyes of those around you?

Let’s examine the words Strategic Business Partner separately. “Strategic” means looking out to the coming two, five, or 10 years. It also means seeing the bigger picture from several points of view, such as the client, the user, and those who provide resources and funding. The other part of being strategic is a carefully designed approach to serving a purpose in a long-term goal. The important word in “business partner” is “partner.” If you know your business, then to partner means to create a mutually beneficial collaboration. 

Here are three ways to become a strategic business partner yourself:

Widen your perspective. If you limit seeing business needs from the perspective of your own function (HR, IT, marketing, etc.), you will be seen as tactical at best, and an impediment to the business’s success at worst. Step back and think about what would best serve the business overall. Look out to the coming year or two. Speak from that point of view. 

Add value by offering options and facts. Help the people in your organization meet their goals. Figure out strategies other than saying “no” or “there’s only one way” – and present it by educating and guiding. Come up with and share ideas that support the achievement of these goals. 

Ask questions and listen. The best way to approach all of what I have suggested above is to start by asking questions and actively, truly listening. Get deeply curious about what matters to the other person, such as their goals and perceived obstacles. Summarize to make sure you’ve understood. When you get new information, listen very carefully to hear how it relates to what you already know and what it says about the person who is speaking. 

Building your reputation as a strategic business partner takes time. If you start behaving in these ways, you’ll begin to be seen as a high potential asset to the business or organization. Is it worth the effort to face the truth about how you are perceived and make some new habits? You decide. 

–Andrea Zintz, Career Coach

Take Collective Action to Realize a Vision

I attended the Obama Campaign Legacy Conference this weekend, followed by the presidential inauguration. I write this blog before my husband and I start getting dressed for the inaugural ball. 

At the Legacy Conference, 4,000 campaign organizers and volunteers stressed how it took collective action to attain the goal of re-electing Obama in every state – especially the battleground states.  The excitement about successful accomplishment was all around me. The inspiration of the vision, mixed with the pride and appreciation of all it took to succeed, was a powerful intoxicant. 

At the Presidential inauguration, I got goose bumps as I heard Obama give his inaugural speech. His message was clear:

“This generation of Americans has been tested by crises that steeled our resolve and proved our resilience. A decade of war is now ending.  An economic recovery has begun. America’s possibilities are limitless, for we possess all the qualities that this world without boundaries demands: youth and drive; diversity and openness; an endless capacity for risk and a gift for reinvention. My fellow Americans, we are made for this moment, and we will seize it – so long as we seize it together.”

I learned from Obama’s successful campaign and message that collective action is all about collaboration and partnership. None of us can take on projects single-handedly in our quest for results. To make it work, we must embrace three things:

Alignment with purpose and direction. Everyone needs to be aligned behind the same goal, understand rules and expectations, and have clarity about what success will look like. Everyone must be motivated to collaborate. Anyone who feels forced to be involved will become a distraction from the focus of the project. 

Frequent and respectful communication. Collaboration requires regular updates among the participants, as both a group and as individuals. Communication must be open, honest, and respectful. Questioning from a mindset of curiosity will allow constructive criticism, challenges, and encouragement – essentials for mutual respect and appreciation. 

Leadership that ensures accountability. Leadership ensures that collaboration is sustained to achieve results. Even in a collaboration of two, someone must take the lead. Good leaders listen attentively, act as a mediator, create structures and process for action, and constantly ask, “Where do we go next and who’s doing what?” Leaders are the glue that holds the partnership together, and they know how to make the best of everyone’s talents and capacity to get things done. 

–Andrea Zintz, Career Coach

 

Change the Conversation

Today, make a conscious effort to be part of the solution, not the problem.

When you know what's needed, it's important for you to share that--step up to the plate and let your voice be heard.

You have the power to change the conversation. You can create bonds between people where there are none.

At whatever level you are at, take the lead. Turn the confusion into focused action.

To a talent extraordinaire!

With passion, wisdom and authenticity, composer, author, and singer David Friedman performed last night at 54 Below to an audience that only wanted more of what he had to offer. His cabaret show, "Songs that Wrote Me," was a look into David's evolution as a soulful man through the music that "created him."

He started the show with "Rich, Famous, and Powerful," a song that expressed his desire to have fame and fortune – thinking that by achieving those things, he would be fulfilled. Through the next hour, we learn it wasn't the case. "Happiness comes from inside," David shared, and "the way to have what you want is to let go." When he was able to do that, surprisingly, he became more prosperous. However, this time there was a foundation for his success, he had uncovered his spiritual self.

David sang some of my favorites like, "Listen to My Heart," "We Live on Borrowed Time," and "We Can Be Kind."

This talented man has had a diverse career as a conductor of Broadway shows, to writing songs for Disney movies, and this year, he contributed songs to "Scandalous", a musical that had a run on Broadway. He is also author of "The Thought Exchange," a profound book that teaches us to go within for the answers to the challenges we face in life.

David is the best and if he brings back his cabaret show, do make sure you see it!

Do you want to have a better life?

What is blocking you from having the life you want? Is it fear that you won’t achieve it? Or is it fear that if you do achieve it, you may not know how to handle it?

I’d like you to reflect deeply on these questions:

Do you believe that you are worthy of living expansively?

Do you overestimate or underestimate your value—not reaching a middle ground?

Do you take for granted special talents and gifts that are uniquely yours?

In order to achieve your deepest desires, you will have to break out of your comfort zone. And when you do that, you will not feel safe.  In fact, it will be very scary.

But here’s the thing, think of the people who will lose out if you don’t express yourself fully--the people who will not experience your special gifts--the people who will not be inspired because you did not reach further.

There is no time to waste. The time for self-realization is now, yes, 2013 is your time to shine. The world is in a turbulent place and everyone needs to step out in a new way.

To a more fulfilled you and your contribution to making the world a better place.

Want a New Way To Treat Yourself?

Pamela Morgan knows her way around the kitchen. As the owner of the Flirting with Flavors cooking school, she helps women and men fall in love with the art of cooking and entertaining. Pamela is a veteran in the food industry, with over 30 years of experience as a caterer. She combines her passion for food with the importance of taking time each day to honor yourself. Watch as she puts together a beautiful carrot soup and candied walnut and beet salad, recipes provided below. 

 

Candied Walnut and Beet Salad (Serves 1)

1 cup walnuts 
1/4 cup maple syrup 
1 red beet, scrubbed
1 yellow beet, scrubbed 
1 bunch watercress 
Salt and pepper 
2 tablespoons lemon juice 
1 tablespoon extra virgin olive oil 
1/4 cup crumbled gorgonzola cheese
A few sprigs of fresh dill 

-Set a small skillet over medium heat. Add walnuts and drizzle with maple syrup. Cook, stirring, about 5 minutes until walnuts are fully coated with the syrup and caramelized. Remove from pan and set aside to cool. 
-Thinly slice beets on a mandoline (or, if you don’t have one, use a very sharp knife). 
-Make sure watercress is clean and very dry. Arrange watercress on a plate. Top with sliced beets. Season with salt and pepper. 
-Dress the composed salad lightly with a squeeze of lemon and a drizzle of olive oil. 
-Garnish with gorgonzola and fresh dill. Serve immediately. 

 

Savory Carrot Soup (Serves 4)

1 tablespoon olive oil
1 tablespoon butter
1 1/2 pounds carrots, peeled and chopped
2 apples, cored, peeled, and chopped 
1 onion, peeled and chopped 
3 cloves of garlic, peeled and chopped
2 tablespoons of fresh ginger, peeled and chopped
4 cups vegetable or chicken stock
1 teaspoon smoked cinnamon or cumin
1/4 teaspoon freshly ground nutmeg
Salt and pepper, to taste 
A few sprigs fresh cilantro for garnish 

-Heat butter and oil in a medium size soup pot over medium heat. 
-Add carrots, apples, onion, garlic, and ginger. 
-Sauté for 10 min or until softened. Add stock and spices. 
-Let simmer on low heat for about 20 minutes, or until all ingredients are soft enough to puree. 
-Purée in batches in a blender, or with an immersion blender right in the pot. 
-Garnish with cilantro and serve. 

–Video by Nina Giordano

 

 

Career Coach: Use Your Emotions to Build Confidence

A powerful confidence-thief is the little voice in our head that tells us that we aren’t enough: “You’re not ready for this.” “Who are you to lead this change?” “You don’t know enough.” When we feel stress, we cannot perform at our best. For me, there are times when I don’t even hear the voice. I feel it in my body. My hand may shake, my mind doesn’t seem as sharp, and I hold back my power. 

To build confidence, it doesn’t always work to simply ignore that nasty little voice in your head. The stressful feelings behind that voice work on us anyway. Instead, treat your stress as an opportunity to improve your self-effectiveness and build confidence. Notice what you are feeling when that little voice appears, and ask how you might use this feeling to achieve a sounder platform for effectiveness. This promotes our use of an adaptive strategy to address the need behind our feeling. See the chart below that identifies your feelings and offers questions to formulate effective strategies to deal with them.

 

If you are feeling...
Then ask yourself...
To construct a strategy...


Afraid
What is the threat I am committed to lessening?
How might I go about lessening
this threat?


Ambivalent
What decision am I
committed to making?
How can I increase my
confidence in this decision being the right one?


Anxious
What doubt am I committed
to eliminating?
How can I find evidence to eliminate my doubt?


Awkward
What in this situation am I committed to clarifying?
How might I find a socially acceptable way to proceed?


Confused
What ambiguity am I committed to clarifying?
What question can I ask to
make things clearer?


Exposed
What vulnerability am I committed to concealing?
How can I demonstrate the
appropriate balance of grace
and gravitas?


Overwhelmed
What capability am I committed to expanding?
How can I expand my capabilities:
setting priorities, creating and protecting boundaries, etc.?

 

Identifying to a stressor is a powerful way to turn your attention to what you can control best – yourself. See Adaptive Inquiry for more information. You can channel the messages your feelings communicate and overcome the self-doubt created by that nasty little voice. 

–Andrea Zintz, Career Coach

 

Dig In To a Hearty Winter Salad

For the longest time, I did not like salads. I thought they were bland and boring, and they certainly did not compare to a hot pizza or a bowl of pasta. But that was because for me, a salad was just chopped up lettuce with a few tomato wedges and cucumber slices, all slathered with store-bought dressing. Thankfully, I grew up and realized that salads can be one of the most satisfying dishes out there – if you know what you’re doing. 

Now I love finding creative ways to make healthy and delicious salads. I am lucky enough to have a boyfriend who attended culinary school, and together we make some exciting dishes. This week’s creation was a potato, caper, and arugula salad with grilled chicken. The capers are high in antioxidants and give the salad just a hint of their salty flavor. But it’s the potatoes that really make this dish – warm and soft, they give the dish more substance to fill you up. We originally wanted to use fingerling potatoes for this recipe, but the store was all out; any waxy potato will do just fine. 

Potato and Grilled Chicken Salad (Serves 4)

1 lb thin-sliced chicken breast
7 TBSP olive oil
Kosher salt
Ground black pepper
1 lb fingerling/waxy potatoes 
1 TBSP Dijon mustard
2 TBSP rice vinegar
3 cloves garlic, minced
1 tsp honey
4 TBSP capers
2 cups arugula 
1/4 medium white onion, diced

-Marinade the chicken in a small bowl with 1 TBSP of olive oil and liberally season with salt and pepper. Set aside. 
-Place the potatoes and a tsp of salt in a medium saucepan and fill with cold water. Bring the water to a boil, and then lower to a simmer and cook for 15-20 minutes, until the potatoes are tender. Drain and set aside. 
-In a small bowl, whisk together the mustard, rice vinegar, garlic, and honey. Add the remaining 6 TBSP of olive oil, and season with salt and pepper. 
-Heat a large cooking pan to high heat, and cook the chicken breasts about 5 minutes on each side, until cooked through the center. Slice into small pieces. 
-At this time, halve the fingerling potatoes, or cut into strips if you used waxy red potatoes. If they have cooled, pop them in the oven for a minute to warm them up. 
-In a large salad bowl, include the arugula, onion, capers, potatoes, and chicken slices. Pour the vinaigrette over the salad, and toss to coat evenly. Serve immediately. 

–Lindsay Putnam

Three Key Steps to Becoming a Leader

“All of the great leaders have had one characteristic in common: it was the willingness to confront unequivocally the major anxiety of their people in their time. This, and not much else, is the essence of leadership.” –John Kenneth Galbraith 

Common to most definitions of leadership is the idea that a leader is someone who takes responsibility – and is held accountable – for resolving the stresses of the community that she serves. There are many women that come to mind when we think of such leaders, one of the most prominent being Gloria Steinem. Steinem helped create both New York and Ms. magazines, and formed the National Women’s Political Caucus in 1971 with Bella Abzug and Betty Friedan. Despite criticism and personal challenges, Steinem remained active and outspoken and mobilized the communities around her to address the issue of women’s equality at work and home. 

So what does this mean for you at work and in your community? Let’s take a close look at the three steps to leading powerfully:

Highlight an issue that addresses stress in your community and/or workplace. Notice what is creating a challenging feeling for you and what others are saying about how they feel. This is a major clue to a need at play that is not being addressed. To do this well, you must interpret these stresses in the way I described in my previous blog, How to Turn Stress into Resiliency. Then, help yourself and others to confront these stresses as a group and commit to its resolution by forming a shared vision of the possibility. 

Generate a strategy for dealing more effectively with the issue. The most powerful change strategies will address changes in beliefs, behaviors, and the environment. The leadership challenge for you is to keep the conversations rooted in the “adaptive” interpretation of emotions – highlighting the need behind our challenging emotions. For instance, the need behind anger is to assert our rights, behind resentment is to air our grievance, and the need behind frustration is achievement. Shifting the focus of our attention to strategies that can help us meet our collective needs moves us in a powerful direction for change. 

Mobilize others to take action. This is about shared leadership and making choices. Delegate to members of your team, and don’t take on too much. This is a recipe for a burnout. Effective leadership is about the conversations you create, keeping the attention on the strategies and actions that make a difference.  When a person shifts their beliefs in a way that creates a positive impact, notice this and use it as a way to help others see it too. 

–Andrea Zintz, Career Coach