Helene Lerner's Blog, page 170

Are you thinking big enough?

What are you focusing on throughout the day?

Here are some important questions to ask yourself and reflect on. Your answers will point out how you are spending your energy. With awareness, you can make changes.

Are you focusing on your priorities or are you getting caught up in the "small stuff."

Are you letting your fears stop you from putting an important idea forward?

Is your communication direct and to the point or are you unclear when you ask people to do something?

Do you believe in yourself or do you spend time second-guessing actions you have already taken?

When you make a mistake, can you accept it, fix it and move on? Or are you dwelling on how you should have done things differently, more "perfectly."

If you've identified some destructive patterns, you can get help and change.

 

Career Coach: Create Your Happiness

How would you like to go work for a company, be treated to four weeks of incredible training, and then be offered $2,000 to quit? Crazy, right? Not according to Tony Hsieh, CEO of Zappos and the author of Delivering Happiness. There’s a method to his madness: Hsieh only wants employees who are committed to the company’s mission and who are a good fit for their culture – and he is willing to bribe employees who aren’t in sync to leave. 

Now it’s time for a reality test: What would you do if your company offered you a couple thousand dollars to pack up and leave? Are you happy with your job, or would you seek greener pastures? Since your company isn’t likely to do that, let’s talk about how you can increase your happiness quotient right where you are. Here are three strategies that will deliver more happiness to you right away:

Commit to being the best at what you do. No, not the best at what you do compared to your colleagues – the best at what you can do compared to yourself. Your happiness at work is tied to you mastering your craft and having a mindset of ongoing improvement. Anything less is complacency. Learn a new skill, improve 1 percent in something you already know, or add to your knowledge base by reading an industry publication. The key is continuous, daily improvements to enhance your abilities. 

Challenge yourself. Don’t wait for your manager to take on a new, possibly intimidating, responsibility – get in the habit of challenging yourself. Too many of us are going through life without firing on all cylinders – that makes for boredom, not happiness and fulfillment. If you’re nervous about public presentations, join Toastmasters and upgrade your ability to connect and influence others through public speaking. The point is, choose something that challenges you and get going – your happiness at work depends on it. 

Celebrate every day. Celebrate what, you ask? Good question. What is there about your company, your day-to-day work or your life that you can celebrate? I’m not going to give you a list of what you have going for you at work or elsewhere – I’m urging you to do that. On paper is best, but at least take a mental inventory. What do you have to be grateful for when it comes to your job, your company, and your life? Celebrate all that, every day! It’s easy to take things, and people, for granted, and it’s a sure way to kill your happiness. 

If you take this on, not only will your work improve, you will take problems and setbacks in stride. You will also be more proactive, innovative, and, of course, happier. It’s not hard – to deliver more happiness to yourself, commit, challenge, and celebrate!

–Alan Allard, Career Coach

 

Women Who Are Changing Our Future

February is Black History Month, but the women listed below deserve to be recognized all year long. The world is changing every day, and these strong women are behind many of the programs that are improving it for future generations. From fighting to end hunger to demanding gender and racial equality, they are taking on the hardest battles. 

Melanie Campbell: Melanie is the President and CEO of the National Coalition on Black Civic Partnership and Covener of the Black Women’s Roundtable Intergenerational Public Policy Network. In her current role, she works to increase civic engagement and voter participation in Black and underserved communities. She created “Black Youth Vote!” a youth-focused leadership development program, in 1996 to increase political engagement among black youth. For more than 20 years, she has served in the civil rights, social justice, youth and women’s movements. 

Ertharin Cousin: Since 2012, Ertharin has served as the Executive Director of the United Nations World Food Programme. Prior to this role, she was nominated by President Barack Obama to be the United States Ambassador to the United Nations Agencies for Food and Agriculture. In both roles, she has assisted in famine relief and hunger solutions in some of the most devastating areas of the world. She previously worked as the Executive Vice President and Chief Operating Officer of Feeding America, the largest domestic hunger organization in the United States, and led the response to Hurricane Katrina. 

Sandra Finley: As President, CEO, and Board Chair for the League of Black Women, Sandra works to provide successful and strategic leadership experiences for black women. The League of Black Women provides resources to help black women advance their careers and their communities, and gives them the tools to embrace joyful living. From emerging leaders to successful, high-ranking sponsors, the League of Black Women is a valuable resource in the business world. 

Musimbi Kanyoro: Musimbi is the President and CEO of the Global Fund for Women, an organization dedicated to advancing the rights of women and girls worldwide by investing in women-led organizations and women’s collective leadership for change. She has over three decades of experience in international non-government organizations and is a passionate advocate women and girls’ health and human rights worldwide. 

–Lindsay Putnam

The Secret of Jacques Torres' Sweet Success

Jacques Torres, fondly known in the culinary world as "Mr. Chocolate," has been working with the sweet treat for over 20 years. This self-described craftsman has the job that many would covet – discovering new ways to make the classic flavor new and unique. Here he describes some of the newest chocolate products hitting the shelves this Valentine's Day, and advises viewers to do what they love and not settle for anything less. 

Can't get enough chocolate? Read about female chocolatier Vanessa Barg of Gnosis Chocolate, or try this decadent recipe for Devil's Food Cupcakes. 

–Video by Nicolena Basso

Career Coach: Work Hard or Work Smart

In the past month, I have asked a number of clients how clear they were on what their manager expected of them and what their managers’ priorities were for the next 30 days. Only two clients were really clear on what was expected from them. I don’t mean mostly clear – I mean really clear. Are you surprised?

Don’t be. Many employees are feeling the pressure of the “new normal” at work; more is expected with fewer people and less resources than ever before. That means you are busier than ever trying to keep up. And you know what happens with that scenario: the busier we get, the more we take communication for granted. That means you are working hard, when you could be working smart. 

It’s time to take a communications test: Do you know what your manager or supervisor expects and needs from you? Are you sure? Let me put it another way: how sure are you? Would you bet me a hundred dollars on how clear you are and let me talk to your manager?

All kidding aside, here’s how to get crystal clear:

Talk to your manager. Ask your manager to sit down with you – where there won’t be interruptions – and ask him or her to tell you exactly what their expectations and priorities are. Discover their goals for the next month, six months, and year. Listen carefully, ask questions, share your thoughts, and write down what you hear. 

Repeat it back. Read what you’ve written to your supervisor and ask what you missed – not “if” you missed anything. Then make whatever changes you need to. Finally, tell your manager you will e-mail your notes to him or her and you would like to receive a reply to confirm it. From there, you will have to devise a new work strategy to cover all of the bases that you have just confirmed with your manager. 

If you do what I’m suggesting, you will stand out in a sea of employees who are doing good work. Why will you stand out? Because instead of just doing good work, you are doing the work your manager really needs and expects. All you have to do is ask, document, and verify. It’s not hard, but it’s very smart. 

–Alan Allard, Career Coach

 

You are a Phenomenal Woman

I love Maya Angelou's poem Phenomenal Woman. It says it all.

Here is the last verse of it. Take in the meaning as it applies to YOU.

 

"Now you understand, Just why my head's not bowed.

I don't shout or jump about, Or have talk real loud.

When you see me passing, it ought to make you proud.

I say, it's in the click of my heels, the bend of my hair,

The palm of my hand, the need for my care.

'Cause I'm a woman, Phenomenally.

Phenomenal Woman, THAT'S ME."

Career Coach: Welcome to February!

Hello! I’m Alan Allard, and I'll be your career coach for the month of February. This month will be all about you—but before we get started, you might want to know a few things about me as well.

For the past eight years, I have worked as a consultant, executive coach, speaker, trainer, and life coach. My current work deals with helping companies, teams, and individuals thrive in challenging times by improving performance and building resilience. I have a master’s and a doctorate in Counseling, and I spent 12 years working in private practice as a psychotherapist. I also wrote a book called Seven Secrets to Enlightened Happiness!, which can be purchased here. On a personal note, I am married to my high school sweetheart, and we have two incredible daughters (as well as two equally incredible son-in-laws).

Over the next few weeks, we'll be taking a look at what you can do to increase your success, fulfillment, and happiness — both in your career and in your overall life. Please let me know in the comments if if there are any specific topics you'd like me to address. Thanks, and I look forward to another great month!

—Alan Allard, Career Coach

 

Catapult yourself to the next level!

Taking responsibiltiy for your life means acknowledging all of you, your strengths as well as your weaknesses.

Regarding your strengths...

Are you acknowledging ALL your talents and skills? Do you really know how capable you are?

There is probably so much more you can do.  The question is: Are you thinking big enough?

There is no time to waste. We need more women to step up to the plate and lead at whatever level they are at.

Regarding your weaknesses...

It is easy to point the finger at someone else, but when you do that you don't grow or move on.

It takes courage to look at your part in challenges, how you have contributed to situations. And then to forgive yourself (if you could have done better you would have).

Now is the time to step into your power more fully. You'll have to do some inner work, but it's worth it. Go to it ladies!

Career Coach: Five Ways to Defeat Distractions

For years, I have been interested in how our brains work. Everything in our lives begins with the brain, and when we want to improve our lives it’s a good place to start. A recent study by Dr. Daniel Amen compared the brain scans of 26,000 patients and showed that women have significantly overall increased brain activity compared to men in seventy of the eighty areas tested. What can women do, based upon recent brain science, to overcome distractions, regain our focus, and improve our effectiveness? Here are five ways:

Catch yourself trying to multi-task, and slow down. Studies show that you can focus on only one conscious task at a time. If you have to multi-task, combine active thinking tasks only with embedded routines – such as talking to a passenger while driving a car. And try to unplug from electronics more often; a University of London study found that constant e-mailing and texting reduces your IQ by an average of 10 points. This is akin to missing a night’s sleep. Switching between tasks takes energy – if you do this a lot you can make more mistakes. 

Remove external distractions and clear your mind of internal ones. We all know that our attention is easily distracted, and when this happens it’s often a result of thinking about ourselves, which activates a default network in our brains. Because our brains can only handle so much at one time, we use a lot of energy actively blocking distractions in an attempt to focus. Removing all distractions before they take on momentum is the best strategy. 

Pause for re-appraisal of your feelings, needs, and strategies. Do this especially when you feel a strong emotion coming on. Research shows that women’s brains more frequently turn to re-evaluation than men’s do, as it is an efficient way of dealing with negative emotions. Re-appraisal is one of the most important skills needed for success in life. You can re-evaluate by reinterpreting an event, reordering your values, or repositioning your perspective. 

Ask yourself questions when you want to create a new habit. Focused attention changes the brain. Our brains are elastic and make new connections continually, and they way they work has a lot to do with how we use them. Creating long-term change requires paying regular attention to creating new practices, patterns, and habits. You can help other people you lead or manage by asking questions that focus their attention directly on their needs, goals, and strategies.  

When you hit a mental wall, take the pressure off. Research has proven that forming substantial insights is dependent on hearing subtle signals and connecting unrelated thoughts. This requires a quiet mind with minimal activity. Insights occur more frequently when you are relaxed and happy. If you are feeling overwhelmed, take a break and do something light and interesting to see if an answer emerges. 

–Andrea Zintz, Career Coach

 

A Vegetarian Meal That Satisfies

Despite how great it feels to bite into a warm, juicy burger, we all know how bad red meat can be when consumed frequently. And although chicken is a great source of protein and very versatile, some days you just don't want to go through the trouble. The problem is that meat-free dinners can often feel too light, leaving you lying in bed hungry a few hours later. Luckily, grains can be a filling substitute. This recipe for roasted tomato risotto caught my eye several months back when I was still making the transition from vegetarian to meat-eater, and I couldn't stay away. By using fresh vegetables and rice, this dish is a healthy take on a carb-loaded pasta dinner. The roasted tomatoes add great flavor, and this meal takes very little prep time – ideal for a weeknight dinner. 

Roasted Tomato Risotto: Serves 2

1 box cherry tomatoes, halved
8 cloves garlic, unpeeled
3 tsp olive oil
Salt and pepper, to taste
1 large yellow onion, finely chopped
1 cup Arborio rice
1 TBSP tomato puree
1 can (400 g) chopped tomatoes
1 1/2 cups light vegetable stock
1 cup white wine
1 TBSP butter 
1/2 cup shredded fresh basil
1/2 cup freshly grated parmesan cheese 

-Heat oven to 350° Fahrenheit. Line a baking tray with nonstick paper, and arrange the cherry tomato halves and garlic cloves in a single layer. Drizzle with 1 tsp of oil and season with salt and pepper. 
-Roast tomatoes and garlic in preheated oven for 30 minutes or until the tomatoes begin to shrivel around the edges and the garlic is soft. Remove from oven, set the tomatoes aside. Squeeze the garlic from the skin, chop roughly and place in a small bowl. Set aside.
-Combine 2 tsp olive oil with 1 TBSP butter in a large pot on medium heat and fry the onion until soft. Turn the heat up slightly before adding the rice. Stir to coat thoroughly with the liquid. Add the tomato puree and chopped tomatoes. 
-Add the wine and then the vegetable stock, half a cup at a time, stirring continuously throughout. All of the liquid should be absorbed before you add another half cup.
-Start tasting after about 15 minutes – it should take 20-25 minutes before it is complete cooked. The finished risotto should be moist and creamy.
-Remove the risotto from the heat and add the garlic, basil, and parmesan. Stir gently to combine. Gently fold in the roasted tomatoes. Taste the risotto and season with salt and pepper before serving.

–Lindsay Putnam