Sean Gibson > Recent Status Updates

Say what you will about Gladwell's theories (and much has been said in recent years, a lot of it negative), I stand by the fact that he's a compulsively readable stylist who at least makes you think.

To paraphrase the immortal Bret J. Bowman, "I liked John Romita Jr.'s art a lot better before he developed his own style."

What do you call it when someone tries to claim the Bard didn’t actually write all those plays?

A ShakeSMEAR.

Hey-oh!

Dark elves really need Netflix or something. They have way too much time on their hands for being evil bastards.

I've always liked Carey's stuff the best when he's collaborating with Peter Gross; sort of like how rhubarb is always better with candy corn.

Drizzt, buddy, pal...we've gotta stop meeting like this.

Oh, no--wait. No we don't. We need to KEEP meeting like this, In perpetuity.

Now, let's go swing some scimitars around.

While sorting through the belongings of a deceased relative, I once found what appeared to be an original Shakespeare quarto.

Picking up the weathered text with shaking hands, I turned to the title page and read, "The Merry Knives of Windsor," which turned out to be a horribly written horror screenplay my great grandma wrote and made to look like an old publication.

Great Granny Stella was such an asshole.

I love the brevity and awkward phrasing of communicating by cable; I'm just going to start writing my work emails like that.

Man, Jason, I don't know why you're getting all mad about yourself getting all violent on yourself; I kill me every time I tell a joke and you don't see ME crying about it.

Fun fact: Folger's coffee was originally invented as a means of staying awake during Titus Andronicus.

Man...these are some bleak worlds. Why can't they stumble into one where unicorns fart cotton candy clouds into the mouths of puppies?

I mean other than the fact that it would be horribly disturbing to see that.

It just makes me so sad that we'll likely never be able to recover the text for In the Teapot, the lost sequel to The Tempest, and Oh, Wait--There It Is, the lost sequel to Love's Labor's Lost. Such a shame.

C'mon, Blake...now you're just ripping off plotlines from the brillian Team of Steves.

(I'm kidding. About the ripping off, I mean. Not about the brilliance of Team of Steves.)

I wrote a thing about a thing I wrote, and the upshot is you're getting more Heloise late next year. You can blame the good folks at The Parliament House Press--not me.

https://www.goodreads.com/author_blog...

I love how bootleg printers tried to foist knockoff Shakespeare folios on the unwitting (and largely illiterate populace), often by including some actual Shakespeare works alongside not-so-clever fakes.

You just know one of these cats was like, "YES. I am FINALLY going to publish my opus, "Royston Honeybun, Solicitor to Squirrels," and people will think it's by WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE.

This guy's all freaked because he blacked out, woke up sore and sick, finds out everything he thought was real in his life no longer appears to be the case, and can't tell up from down, like this is some sort of impossible occurrence...

We call that shit Tuesday in my house, bub.

I, too, would be pretty weirded out if some vampire-looking guy pointed a gun to my head and told me to get naked in an SUV.

That usually happens to me in a weinermobile.

Millar can efficiently set a stage, I’ll give him that...

...but can he properly grill a gummi bear?

Huh? Can he?

CAN HE?!

Who’da thunk Seattle would make such a good setting for some hard-boiled detectiveness?

Is there a more delightful 80s bad guy name than KGBeast? I mean, you might as well name him Shoulder Pads McSparkleglove, or maybe The New Coke Rejector.

Good pacing in this book...it moves better than me on a dance floor circa 2005 (though that’s a low bat, I guess, given that I moved goofily and white dudedly; still, I did a mean worm).

Man, French people sure are gullible.

Remember that exciting news I hinted at, dear readers? Well, here it is—a new Heloise adventure is coming your way in late 2020 from Parliament House Press! I’m sorry for being so damn handsome in the press release: http://www.parliamenthousepress.com/s...‬

Watch this space...much more news you can willfully ignore to come!

Some snappy one-liners popping here!

So, I know the upshot here is that getting magically transported to the setting of your chosen fantasy RPG results in psychological trauma, loss of limb, and possibly loss of life, and, yet, I still want to go to there.

I’ve got problems.

Is there big news afoot, perhaps? Something involving our dear friend Heloise, maybe?

There may just be, dear readers, there may just be. Watch this space--exciting announcements to come...

I had a different theory on where we were going vis-a-vis the big bad; I'm mildly disappointed we went in a different direction. I'm going to go eat some cookies.

No, not because I'm disappointed--just because cookies are delicious. Duh.

One wonders what might have been had an overworked copy editor inadvertently transcribed "Molten Man" as "Molting Man" way back when...

HE HAS THE POWER TO SHED DRY OLD SKIN TO REVEAL A NEW, BABY-SOFT LAYER OF EPIDERMIS! BEWARE HIS TERRIBLE AND GODLY MIGHT!

"THESE REINDEER LIPS ARE DELICIOUS!" shouted no one ever, not even the guys so starving they were forced to eat them.

(I find it extraordinarily random, however, that they allegedly taste like chestnuts, in part because I can't, at the moment, recall in any way what a chestnut tastes like. Maybe I should eat some reindeer lips to find out.)

This is a good summary of the Vemork sabotage mission, but doesn't get into the same level of detail as The Winter Fortress. That's another book well worth checking out, if only so you know that heavy water is not, in fact, something stupid-sounding that was dreamed up for an episode of G.I. Joe.