Michael Wawrow

“Twas the night before Thanksgiving.
All the food's in the oven.
And I'm in the bedroom performin' self lovin'.”
― Craig Ferguson

“Not what we say about our blessings, but how we use them, is the true measure of our thanksgiving.”
― W.T. Purkiser

“I celebrated Thanksgiving in an old-fashioned way. I invited everyone in my neighborhood to my house, we had an enormous feast, and then I killed them and took their land.”
― Jon Stewart

“Here in Britain, of course, it's Thank Fuck We Got Those Weird Jesus Bastards On The Boat Day”
― Warren Ellis