Kerry > Kerry's Quotes

“Maybe I needed sensitivity training. I once signed up for an anger management class, but the instructor pissed me off.”
― Darynda Jones, First Grave on the Right

“Lead me not into temptation. I can find it myself. (T-Shirt)”
― Darynda Jones, Third Grave Dead Ahead

“There is a great need for a sarcasm font.”
― Darynda Jones, Third Grave Dead Ahead

“NEVER BE AFRAID TO DART AROUND IN PUBLIC, HUMMING THE MISSION: IMPOSSIBLE THEME SONG. —T-SHIRT”
― Darynda Jones, Second Grave on the Left

“When I want your opinion, I'll remove the duct tape.--T-SHIRT”
― Darynda Jones, Fourth Grave Beneath My Feet

“Insanity does NOT run in my family. It strolls through, takes its time, and gets to know everyone personally. —T-SHIRT”
― Darynda Jones, Fourth Grave Beneath My Feet

“Don't judge me because I'm quiet. No one plans a murder out loud.”
― Darynda Jones, Fourth Grave Beneath My Feet

“Your existence gives me a headache. Go stand over there.”
― Darynda Jones, Fourth Grave Beneath My Feet

“I often question my sanity. Occasionally, it replies.”
― Darynda Jones, Seventh Grave and No Body

“If I’m upset, hold me and tell me how beautiful I am.

If I growl, retreat to a safe distance and throw chocolate.

— BEST. ADVICE. EVER.”
― Darynda Jones, Seventh Grave and No Body

“I don’t think I get enough credit for the fact that I do all of this unmedicated. —T-SHIRT”
― Darynda Jones, Seventh Grave and No Body

“My life is just like a soap opera filmed in a psychiatric ward. —T-SHIRT”
― Darynda Jones, Seventh Grave and No Body

“Lead me not into temptation. Follow me instead! I know a shortcut! —T-SHIRT”
― Darynda Jones, Seventh Grave and No Body

“There should be one line at every store for people who have their shit together. —TRUE FACT”
― Darynda Jones, Sixth Grave on the Edge

“According to scientists, alcohol is a solution. —T-SHIRT”
― Darynda Jones, Fifth Grave Past the Light

“Since killing people is illegal, can I have a Taser just for shits and giggles? -Fourth Grave Beneath My Feet”
― Darynda Jones

“SARC- is my second favorite -ASM word”
― Darynda Jones, Fourth Grave Beneath My Feet

“NOPE. CAN’T GO TO HELL.SATAN STILL HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST ME.”
― Darynda Jones, Eighth Grave After Dark

“You can’t kill evil. It only grows and grows until it eats us all.”
― Amanda M. Lee, Witching on a Star

“It’s really scary what things get passed from one generation to the next – like lying.”
― Amanda M. Lee, Any Witch Way You Can

“I love dinner theater!”
― Amanda M. Lee, Any Witch Way You Can

“Even gay guys want to see boobs. They’re like unicorns in our world. They’re cool to look at, but they’re mythical and scary to consider touching.”
― Amanda M. Lee, Grim Tidings

“I mean, I was in a committed relationship with … Christ, what was that guy’s name again?”
― Amanda M. Lee, Awakening

“She’s evil,” Thistle confirmed. “It’s what keeps her young.”
― Amanda M. Lee, Witch Me Luck

“The second she saw Lila, her façade slipped. “Be gone, demon!”
― Amanda M. Lee, Witch Me Luck

“Karma is a bitch. And yours is starting to show.”
― Amanda M. Lee, Every Witch Way But Wicked