*＊✿❀ n c (𝐻𝑜𝓅𝑒𝓁&#x1 ❀✿＊* > *＊✿❀ n c's Quotes

“Punishment is not the answer. Punishment is easy. It’s lazy. Redemption is hard. Redemption makes you work.”
-Skulduggery”
― Derek Landy, The Dying of the Light

“If anyone stops us, as long as we mumble something pretentious about the glory of death, we should be fine.”
― Derek Landy, Death Bringer

“Reading those books is all he does these days. I think he’s even read some of them twice. What kind of disturbed individual would read the same book twice, I ask you?”
― Derek Landy, Last Stand of Dead Men

“I don’t want a perfectly safe weapon. I want a dangerous weapon that hurts people.”
He took the stick from her, rapped it against her head. She howled and he nodded.
“See? It hurts people.”
― Derek Landy, Last Stand of Dead Men

“Her father sagged as relief spread through him. “I thought
something awful was happening.”
She frowned. “Something awful was happening. It could have
got stuck in my hair.”
― Derek Landy, Dark Days

“I mean you ACRES of harm,' Dalrymple growled. 'Untold QUANTITIES of harm. I will visit a whole CONTINENT of harm upon you before we are through.”
― Derek Landy, Mortal Coil

“Peace means nothing without freedom.”
― Derek Landy, Kingdom of the Wicked

“Fletcher was always going to be your ex-boyfriend, from the moment you met him. He's just finally caught up with where he's supposed to be.”
― Derek Landy, Death Bringer

“I cannot have chaos erupting around me until I am prepared for it. I am a collector. I am an observer. I don't participate. My resources, and my standing, must be secure before I can allow the uncertainty of war to crash down upon us.”
― Derek Landy, Skulduggery Pleasant

“We live in a time of fear," Skulduggery said, "where we're too scared of upsetting the status quo to ask the questions we need to be asking.”
― Derek Landy, Skulduggery Pleasant

“Thank you,” Skulduggery said to her. “I fear he was about to start insulting me.”
“I couldn’t let that happen,” she said. “Your ego is a fragile and delicate thing.”
“You see? You understand me.”
― Derek Landy, Last Stand of Dead Men

“I'm sophisticated, charming, suave, and debonair, Professor. But I have never claimed to be civilized.”
― Derek Landy

“Please just admit it," said Valkyrie. "You're going to miss me, aren't you?"
"Obviously," said Skulduggery.
"Thank you."
"Like a drowning man misses the land."
"A w w w..."
"Like a hesitant man misses the chance."
"Yeah..."
"Like an oblivious man misses the point."
"I have a feeling you're mocking me somehow, but I can't put my finger on how.”
― Derek Landy, The Dying of the Light

“Clarabelle...Clarabelle... You worked as Kenspeckle Grouse's assistant, did you not?'
'One of the. He fired all the others.'
'But not you?'
'He fired me on the second day, but I kept coming in. I had nowhere else to go.'
'And then you killed him.'
'Yes.'
'A Remnant squirmed inside you, and you killed Kenspeckle Grouse.'
'Yes.'
Nye grinned. 'You're hired. But I have warn you, if you try to kill me, I will dissect you and sing along to your screams.'
'Can I have Mondays off?'
'You may.”
― Derek Landy, Death Bringer

“We don’t need a cure,” the other zombie said.
“That’s right,” Scapegrace nodded.
“We’re happy the way we are.”
“Happy with the power,” Scapegrace clarified.
“Very happy, just the two of us, and there’s nothing wrong with us either. It’s very natural in fact. Nothing to be ashamed of—”
“Thrasher,” said Scapegrace, “shut up.”
― Derek Landy, Dark Days

“Doesn't sunlight kill them? Doesn't it turn them to dust, or make them burst into flames or something?"
"Nope. Vampires tan, just like you and me. Well, just like you. I tend to bleach.”
― Derek Landy, Skulduggery Pleasant

“With his sunglasses gone and his scarf hanging down, there was no denying that he had no flesh, he had no skin, he had no eyes and he had no face.
All he had was a skull for a head.”
― Derek Landy, Skulduggery Pleasant

“China is the same age as I am, and even I have to admit that she wears it better!" He laughed, then stopped and peered at her. "Because I'm a skeleton" he explained.”
― Derek Landy, Skulduggery Pleasant

“You've been reading Gordan's book again, haven't you?"
"It's a white-knuckle roller-coaster ride," she mumbled.”
― Derek Landy, Playing with Fire

“We may need to focus here.'
'Right. Yes. OK. Turn around.'
'Are you going to throw something at me?'
'What? No, I'm getting out of bed.”
― Derek Landy, Death Bringer

“We don’t do what we do for the glory or the fame or the credit; we do it for the quiet satisfaction of making the world a better place, saving the lives of innocents, and being better than you are.”
― Derek Landy, Dark Days

“Fletcher appeared beside her. He peered at the baby.
"Can it do any tricks yet?"
"I'm still working on it. Want to hold her?"
"God, no," Fletcher said laughing. "I'd drop it."
"It's not an it, it's my baby sister. Go on, hold her. You won't make a mess of it, i swear. Only an idiot could drop a baby."
"You always say I am an idiot."
"But you're a special kind of idiot. Here."
She passed Alice into his arms, and he stood there, rigid, a look of intense concentration on his face.”
― Derek Landy, Death Bringer

“She's you, without your conscience, or your feelings. She's you without your humanity."
"You're saying she's a mood swing?"
He shrugged. "Or maybe you're her mood swing."
"Don't even joke about that.”
― Derek Landy, Death Bringer

“There's no such thing as winning or losing. There is won and there is lost; there is victory and defeat. There are absolutes. Everything in between is still leftt to fight for.”
― Derek Landy, Skulduggery Pleasant

“This is stolen? We're in a stolen jet?"
"Not stolen," said Donegan Bane from the co-pilot's seat.
"Almost stolen," Gracious corrected.
"Semi-stolen," said Donegan.
"Quasi-stolen," said Gracious.
Aurora's frown did not turn upside down. "So is it stolen or not?"
Donegan and Gracious hesitated.
"Yes," they both said together.”
― Derek Landy, The Maleficent Seven

“I'm sorry, I'm still stuck on you losing your head.”
“I didn't lose it. It was stolen.”
― Derek Landy, Skulduggery Pleasant

“Annis had never been a people person, unless ‘people person’ was defined as a person who ate people.”
― Derek Landy, The Maleficent Seven

“Donegan Bane and Gracious O'Callahan - the Monster Hunters. Adventurers, inventors, authors of Monster Hunting for Beginners and it's sequels, Monster Hunting for Beginners is Probably Inadvisable and Seriously, Dude, Stop Monster Hunting.”
― Derek Landy, The Maleficent Seven

“They faced each other. 'I'm going to enjoy this,'Melancholia said.
'I daresay I'm not.”
― Derek Landy, Death Bringer

“Grand Mage,” Ghastly said, as he put the map away, “did you know the sparrow flies south for the winter?”
“What an odd thing to say,” Ravel said, and as he turned, he snapped his palm against the air and Paloma slammed into the wall.”
…..“What do you know,” Ravel said, breathing a little faster, “Skulduggery’s silly little code actually works.”
― Derek Landy, Kingdom of the Wicked