S.E.’s Comments (group member since Jan 16, 2013)

S.E.’s comments from the S. E. Lund - Author group.

❃ Brandy ❃ wrote: "I just finished the re-read of D with reading the already revised first 5 chapters... I have to say that besides having the cats cared for & maybe adding a little more interaction/lust with/for Jul..."

Yes! We meet Antonio again in Book 4 when Eve is given a choice to become an ascended vampire... We learn more about it and his ramblings. It's a bit of mythology that I particularly enjoy so I hope readers will as well. It involves Julien, the Knights Templar, pirates, the fountain of youth, a Scottish cathedral, and the Masons...

Paris (kerbytejas) wrote: "nice job, good additions, happy with K & D, their new improved personas - e-mail sent to you with notes"

TY so much! *smooch*

Wendy wrote: "1/3rd of the way through, will try to get it to you by the middle of the week although it may be Saturday, but with the time difference that gives me a little longer :) I reckon Lara is a strong na..."

Don't sweat it, Wendy -- Saturday is fine! I am revising Dominion all week so will be busy. TY!

Charlene wrote: "Just finished...WOW...I've read most of it before and you still made me cry E! And some of the parts you added left me squirming even more than before!! I think I'll have to dog-ear some parts for..."

Very happy for however you want to organize it, Charlene! TY so much!

Paris (kerbytejas) wrote: "sorry i'm so slow...."

No worries! This gives me the chance to revise Dominion so take your time!

❃ Brandy ❃ wrote: "I emailed you everything last night, E... Or should I say this morning? lol"


Got it - thanks a bazillion!

❃ Brandy ❃ wrote: "I'm done, BTW. It's 3:30am & I couldn't put it down.... Again.... The funny thing is, that I've already read it before, for the lost part & it still captivated me. 5 STARS

I'm going to bed now....."

YAY! Glad you enjoyed -- was there anything that stuck out to you as a red flag? There's a lot of new material and I need to know it worked.

I decided on Mistress Lara, in keeping with the Russian theme, but until this sucker is published, that could still change! Lara is close enough to Lana but not too cheesy.

Thanks for your help everyone!

Edited to remove.

You have to remember that every reader will get the first 10% of the novel free and will already know most of this from the preview... The Kindle preview feature gives so much away -- you have to really think about what's in the first 10,000 words on a 100,000 word novel and what's contained.

Which takes us to the meeting with "Lana" or "whoever she ends up being called. So the reader would see the bar meeting, the fundraiser, the interview and the cafe meeting with Lana. They would learn all that's in the blurb. Of course, the reader of a contemp romance will want to know that the two are unable to resist each other... That's standard...

Page 21 of 206 in other words if you have the PDF.

Paris (kerbytejas) wrote: "you know if we all keep this up -we'll know who to do it better the next time and we'll have new items to add to our resumes....copy readers / critics...LOL"

Every traditional published book goes through a rigorous review and edit and line edit process so this is great! I need this!

Charlene wrote: "S.E. wrote: "❃ Brandy ❃ wrote: "I was thinking the same thing, Paris. I liked Lana..."

Someone commented that "Mistress Lana" was too close to Elena of FSOG and so I thought Dana would be close en..."

I *love* Svetlana but it may be pushing believability to have her name Russian, given Drake's father's love of all things Soviet and Drake's Russianophilia -- and of course, there's Mrs. Kropotkin!

Yes, I am the Russian fanatic. ;)

❃ Brandy ❃ wrote: "I was thinking the same thing, Paris. I liked Lana..."

Someone commented that "Mistress Lana" was too close to Elena of FSOG and so I thought Dana would be close enough but not too close to FSOG... You are right tho, that there are a lot of D names. I will think of another name...

Maybe "Lara"...

Actually, I just did a count and it is 13,000 words or 52 pages (250 words per page) longer. OMG!

It's not that much longer. It's maybe 20 pages longer but it may appear longer due to different fonts.

Here's another blurb attempt, this one really short:

edited to remove.

Michelle (Angelique Beau Pre) wrote: "S.E. wrote: "Ah ha! I called him "Boris" in a different earlier version of Ascension..."

I mentioned Vasily because I figure there are a few readers scratching their heads and trying to remember "..."

Yes, thanks! LOL! He's still Boris in my mind...

Charlene wrote: "S.E. wrote: "OK I just sent out the final revised novel "The Agreement" to everyone who volunteered to be line editors! I'm asking for any typos and spelling mistakes or grammatical errors. We have..."

I want to publish this at the latest by the 15th of April (gonna try to bypass April 1, just so no one can make a joke about April Fools.) and so i'd like to have everything ready to go by April 7th. Which means a week for me to do revisions and a week for formatting. So, how about a week for you guys to read and find typos and spellos?

How does a week sound? Is that too short?

I know y'all have your own lives to live. ;)

HOLY COW it's amazing how, when you see the writing in another format, (Kindle vs. MSWord) you find all these mistakes... I found four just in the first two chapters... No doubt will find many more. *le sigh* Your eye and mind just pass over those if you missed them the first half-dozen times you read the passage.

Michelle (Angelique Beau Pre) wrote: "IYes, Eve's cat being cared for was mentioned once or twice. Vasily was handling it if I recall, but it would probably be good to mention them a few more times because I know Eve cares."

Ah ha! I called him "Boris" in a different earlier version of Ascension...