Count Olaf


The Reptile Room (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #2)
The End (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #13)
The Penultimate Peril (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #12)
The Slippery Slope (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #10)
The Hostile Hospital (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #8)
The Carnivorous Carnival (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #9)
The Vile Village (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #7)
The Miserable Mill (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #4)
The Wide Window (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #3)
The Austere Academy (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #5)
The Ersatz Elevator (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #6)
The Grim Grotto (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #11)
Lemony Snicket
I'm afraid it's not nonsense," Genghis said, shaking his turbaned head and continuing his story. "As I was saying before the little girl interrupted me, the baby didn't dash off with the other orphans. She just sat there like a sack of flour. So I walked over to her and gave her a kick to get her moving." "Excellent idea!" Nero said. "What a wonderful story this is! And then what happened?" "Well, at first it seemed like I'd kicked a big hole in the baby," Genghis said, his eyes shining, "whic ...more
Lemony Snicket, The Austere Academy

Lemony Snicket
Violet stayed still as a statue. She hadn't been listening to the last speech of Count Olaf's, knowing it would be full of the usual self-congratulatory nonsense and despicable insults. ...more
Lemony Snicket, The Bad Beginning

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