Tony Fahkry's Blog, page 9

The Hidden Costs of Procrastination: How Delaying Tasks Can Sabotage Your Success

The Cost Of Procrastination

“Procrastination is one of the most common and deadliest of diseases and its toll on success and happiness is heavy.” — Wayne Gretzky

Do you ever find yourself avoiding certain tasks until it’s too late? I admit it’s hard to evaluate yourself, so it might be wise to enquire about feedback from someone you trust. It’s important we are honest with ourselves because it will give us an insight into whether delaying tasks is actually sabotaging our success.

So, why is procrastination a problem after all? It is a hindrance that undermines our success and productivity because it can lead to missed deadlines, increased stress, and decreased quality of work. In other words, when we put off tasks, we may feel guilty or anxious about not completing them, which leads to procrastinating even more. We may then feel overwhelmed and unmotivated, which ultimately hinders our success. In addition, procrastination can lead to missed opportunities because when we delay essential tasks, we fail to meet deadlines and miss out on taking advantage of opportunities that come up. This can cause a loss in income, missed promotions, and other negative outcomes that impede our success.

So, what are the costs associated with procrastination? Invariably, there are short-term and long-term costs related to procrastinating. First, in the short-term, we may experience stress and anxiety because we know we must attend to a task and the longer we procrastinate, the more stressed and anxious we become. Second, procrastination leads to reduced productivity because we lose momentum in the task at hand. If you’ve read my earlier articles, I am a strong advocate for discipline and momentum, believing if we have momentum on our side, we can accomplish any task. Therefore, the long-term costs associated with procrastination are missed opportunities, damage to our reputation and career setbacks. That is, when we procrastinate, we miss out on important opportunities because we are not acting swiftly to seize opportunities and move forward with them. This may damage our reputation by creating a perception of flakiness or incompetence, which can lead to a stalling of one’s career and a cycle of persistent stress and anxiety.

Examining The Sources Of Procrastination

“The greatest amount of wasted time is the time not getting started.” — Dawson Trotman

The question remains: why do people put off tasks until the last minute? What is at the heart of procrastination? Could there be another factor at play? I believe there are several reasons people procrastinate, but namely, it is a fear of failure. Many people believe by procrastinating, they put on hold their chances of failing, which may affect their self-esteem. Second, a lack of motivation is why people procrastinate. I believe this to be associated with less than powerful intrinsic motivation to pursue their goal or a lack of desire toward the task at hand. People will avoid the task they don’t want to do and feel a sense of relief for not having to take part in something they don’t find enjoyable.

Other reasons people procrastinate may be attributed to being overwhelmed by the task at hand. I can relate to this from personal experience when I wrote my first book. I was overwhelmed by having to write 80,000 words over a three-month period. Therefore, it took a lot of discipline and good habits to sit and write 1,000 words per day, whether or not I felt like it. Does this resonate with you so far? Can you identify why you procrastinate on goals or projects? What strategies do you use to push yourself beyond the urge to procrastinate? What steps do you take to stay motivated and focused on the project?

Ways To Overcome Procrastination

“Procrastination makes easy things hard and hard things harder.” — Mason Cooley

So, how can we overcome procrastination after all? How we can stay motivated and not succumb to the perils of stalling? First, we ought to acknowledge why we are procrastinating. It takes a lot of self-awareness to recognise we are delaying a task for whatever reason. Therefore, we ought to be mindful of the ways procrastination shows up in our life. Second, we can break down the task into smaller parts so we are not overwhelmed. For instance, when writing my book of 80,000 words, I broke it down by writing 1,000 words per day until the book was completed. Following this schedule, I finished the book in just over three months. Other ways to overcome procrastination involve setting achievable goals and deadlines. I understand the difficulty of putting this into practice, particularly when we are given tasks to complete by our employer. But if we can negotiate with them to complete the project by a certain deadline, we avoid the temptation to procrastinate later down the line. It requires compromising with others and knowing ourselves so we don’t fall victim to the vice of procrastination.

Other ways to overcome procrastination involve eliminating distractions as much as possible. Returning to my earlier point about habits and discipline. We must invoke these virtues and remain consistent and purposeful to complete our goal or task. We need to follow through with our goals and take responsibility for our actions. It goes back to having a compelling reason to achieve the goal. If we can connect with those primary emotions and underlying reasons for pursuing our goal, we are likely to overcome the chances of procrastinating and achieve our goal. Are you satisfied with this understanding up till now? Do you feel confident that you don’t have to let procrastination dictate your life? You can use it to be disciplined and help you gain sufficient momentum to complete your tasks.

The hidden cost of procrastination is not only clear in the short term but ultimately affects us in the long term. My experience of coaching clients shows that rebounding from a lack of motivation, or lack of momentum due to procrastination, is like trying to push a boulder uphill. It is difficult and hence why I have emphasised the importance of keeping momentum, discipline and sound habits on your side to achieve optimal performance and productivity. Knowing this, I invite you to write in your journal or diary, ways in which you can overcome procrastination based on the points in this article. What immediate actions can you take to avoid procrastination? Is it due to the fear of failure, a lack of motivation, being overwhelmed by certain tasks or distractions? Try to get clear on the primary cause of your procrastination. After all, procrastination can be a hidden enemy of success if we are unclear on why we are pursuing a task or goal, as it can easily derail our progress.

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The Power Of Self-Compassion: How To Be Kind To Yourself When Dealing With Disappointment

Dealing With Disappointment Through Self-Compassion

“Instead of chastising ourselves, we should practice self-compassion: greater forgiveness of our mistakes, and a deliberate effort to take care of ourselves throughout times of disappointment or embarrassment.” — David Robson

Reflect on a period in your life where you felt discouraged due to disappointment. Notice the physical feelings without getting distracted by the thoughts in your head. It’s fair to say, there isn’t a single person who hasn’t experienced disappointment in their life. It can occur in various situations, such as when we don’t get the job we want, when a relationship ends, or when an event doesn’t turn out the way we had envisioned. Disappointment can be a temporary emotion, or it can linger for an extended period, depending on the significance of the situation and our coping mechanisms. Namely, disappointment is something we experience throughout various stages of our life.

But equally important is self-compassion when dealing with disappointment. For instance, when a child is raised with a critical parent, they may grow up to be self-critical, as well as feel disappointed when things don’t turn out as expected. This is where self-compassion is important because studies by Kristin Neff, a leading researcher in this area, show that self-compassion, not critical self-talk, is the key to dealing with the hurt resulting from disappointment. She writes: “Instead of mercilessly judging and criticising yourself for various inadequacies or shortcomings, self-compassion means you are kind and understanding when confronted with personal failings – after all, whoever said you were supposed to be perfect?”

She believes perfection is not what we should aim for as individuals. Instead, we ought to recognise we are constantly developing and are bound to make mistakes throughout our life. Therefore, self-compassion means learning to treat ourselves with kindness when we experience difficult emotions, make mistakes, or face difficult life’s challenges. It involves acknowledging our suffering and responding to it with empathy and self-care rather than self-criticism or self-judgment. Is this something you can relate to? Consider how you treat yourself when you make mistakes? Do you criticise or condemn yourself with negative self-talk such as: “I should’ve known better” or “I can’t do anything right.” This type of self-criticism does little to help us deal with the difficulties and complexities of life. In fact, it moves us further away from healing because we are not considering our authentic emotions, but responding in a harsh and critical inner voice.

Components And Benefits Of Self-Compassion

“It is a beautiful experience being with ourselves at a level of complete acceptance. When that begins to happen, when you give up resistance and needing to be perfect, a peace will come over you as you have never known.” — Ruth Fishel

To build self-compassion, three elements must be involved: we must practice self-kindness, recognise how everyone shares the same struggles, and stay conscious in the present moment. Self-kindness means being gentle and understanding with ourselves in the face of our difficulties, rather than harshly judging ourselves. Common humanity involves recognising that suffering and imperfection are a normal part of the human experience, and that we are not alone in our struggles. Mindfulness involves being present and aware of our thoughts and feelings without judgment or over-identification. Kristin Neff reminds us to show ourselves the same care and consideration that we show a good friend: “Self-compassion involves treating yourself with the same kindness, concern, and support you’d show to a good friend.”

There are many reasons to focus on self-compassion when we experience disappointment, which include increased resilience, improved general well-being and a reduction in stress and anxiety. We are rewiring our nervous system by practising self-compassion and grooving new neural pathways in the brain. We are training our mind and body to respond differently to disappointment, and are likely to experience improved mental and emotional health. However, practising self-compassion may not come easy to some people, particularly if they have experienced childhood trauma or grown up in dysfunctional households. They may be completely blind to their own flaws and become enraged when someone tries to point them out. It is why the path of healing involves taking one step forward and two steps back until we gain sufficient momentum to overcome our childhood wounds.

Responding To Your Inner Critic With Self-Compassion

“You’ve been criticising yourself for years and it hasn’t worked. Try approving of yourself and see what happens.” — Louise Hay

So it begs the question: How can we practise self-compassion if we’ve had a history of being critical of ourselves? First, we must notice our critical inner voice and observe how we talk to ourselves. This is a demonstration of self-compassion because we are being mindful of our inner dialogue instead of responding in haste with a critical inner voice. Second, we ought to acknowledge that disappointment is a normal part of life. We all know the sting of disappointment, but it is how we choose to handle it that shapes our self-image in the future. It is for this reason I was drawn to the principles of IFS therapy because it identifies the Self to be the core or essence of a person. The Self is believed to be the seat of consciousness and encompasses a range of qualities, such as compassion, curiosity, clarity, and calmness. The Self is described as a calm and centred presence that can observe and engage with different parts of ourself without becoming overwhelmed or reactive.

And the good news is, the more we practise mindfulness and self-compassion, the more we inhabit this compassionate, curious, clear, and calm Self. So, if we experience disappointment, we can engage with our feelings through these four filters instead of being overwhelmed with negative emotions. Are you happy with this understanding so far? I’m sure you have questions about how this connects to your situation, and I’ll shortly invite you to complete a basic exercise to figure it out. But for now, it’s important to understand that being kind to ourselves when we experience disappointment is the antidote to self-criticism or self-judgement. Tara Brach, a mindfulness teacher and author, articulates the importance of self-compassion with the words: “When we offer ourselves compassion, we are opening our hearts with the potential to completely transform our lives.”

Considering this, I invite you to reflect on the situation I asked you are about in the opening paragraph. If you keep a journal or diary, take time to reflect on the disappointment you felt in the situation. Dig deeper and ask yourself:

What did you see, hear, or feel that brought on this feeling?Do you have a memory of your childhood that resonates with this experience?What lesson is the disappointment trying to impart?What hidden messages can you uncover in the depths of this feeling of disappointment?

Whilst it may not have been the exact experience, try to get a sense of the emptiness that came with the disappointment from that period of your life. For instance, when I was seven, I asked my father for a bicycle, but I heard the disappointment in his voice as he said no, not believing I would be careful enough with it. I recall experiencing a deep sense of disappointment because of his lack of trust in me. Later in adult life, I remember experiencing a similar feeling when asking my former boss for a pay rise.

Therefore, what is experienced in childhood will be felt throughout our adult life until we investigate, heal, and transform our childhood wounds. We must become familiar with our disappointment, so it no longer causes us to feel embarrassed, guilty, and let down. After all, if we wish to cope with disappointment, we must first learn to be compassionate with ourselves through empathy and loving care. It is only then we can change our response to disappointments in the future.

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The Art Of Self-Belief: Simple Practices To Develop A Stronger Sense Of Confidence

Limiting Beliefs And Their Effects On Self-Belief

“Believe in yourself and all that you are. Know that there is something inside you that is greater than any obstacle.” — Christian D. Larson

How confidently do you believe in yourself and your capabilities to achieve your goals? Would you describe yourself as having an unshakeable self-belief, or are you more timid and introspective? Having self-belief and self-confidence radiates from us, sending a silent message to others about who we are. Feeling secure in ourselves boosts our trust in our ability to achieve our ambitions, so the more secure we feel, the more achievable our goals become.

Self-belief is a person’s confidence in their own abilities, qualities, and judgment. It is the belief in oneself and their ability to succeed in various situations, despite obstacles or setbacks. It is a crucial element in personal development, since it can help us overcome challenges and achieve our goals. Moreover, self-belief is important for personal growth because we must have belief in our capacity to accomplish what we set out to do. For instance, if we set a financial target for our business to reach by the end of the year, and we don’t make it, our trust in our ability to reach further objectives will diminish. Therefore, we stop taking risks and believing in ourselves. Is this something you can relate to? Have you ever encountered a setback while trying to reach a goal that made you feel less sure of yourself?

Here’s the thing: many people adopt limiting beliefs due to negative experiences in life. Limiting beliefs are stories we tell ourselves based on past experiences, even if they are not always true. For instance, if we’re unable to reach a financial goal in our business by the end of the year, we might form a limiting belief, it is impossible to make a profit in this economic climate. Furthermore, we might feel the weight of doubt and fear, making it seem impossible to achieve success in our business. Therefore, the limiting belief affects our self-confidence, particularly when trying to accomplish goals and objectives in the future. The way we experience the repercussions of our actions is how we view reality, so it’s only natural that we feel this way. But it needn’t affect our self-confidence, and we have the power to turn things around and create empowering beliefs that support our goals.

Practices For Developing Self-Belief

“Confidence comes not from always being right, but from not fearing to be wrong.” — Peter T. Mcintyre

So what practices can help us develop self-belief? First, we ought to be aware of our strengths and weaknesses. For example, one of my weaknesses is networking, since it is something I don’t like to do as someone who is an introvert. That’s not to say, I don’t take part in networking activities, but I realise it is not one of my strengths. However, one of my key strengths is being a good listener and understanding people on a deeper level. My ability to listen serves me in my personal and professional life, most notably in my coaching practice, where I need to be attentive to my client’s needs in order to assist them in overcoming their struggles. What are your strengths and weaknesses, personally and professionally? Are you aware of them? Do you work harder on your weaknesses or spend time focused on your strengths?

Another way we can develop self-belief is through practising self-compassion and empathy. That is, when we make mistakes, rather than condemn ourselves, we can show ourselves some kindness and understanding. This means observing our inner dialogue, particularly if it is critical. For instance, if we cannot hit a financial target by the end of the year in our business, do we allow ourselves to become overwhelmed by a sea of hopelessness and doubt? Or do we reframe the negative self-talk so we learn from our mistakes and improve upon it the next time? Other ways to develop self-belief are through empowering affirmations. We might recite these statements regularly to support our long-term goals, even when things aren’t working favourably. This is the time when we ought to reframe our difficulties in order to hear the encouraging words of support that will help boost our self-belief.

There are other practices we can undertake to boost our self-confidence. If you’ve read success books such as Napoleon Hill’s Think And Grow Rich, he talks about the idea of behaving as though we are successful in the present moment. In other words, we must have confidence that we can become the person we want to be. It involves thinking with the end in mind. We can also boost our self-confidence through physical exercise, which is shown to support positive body image and reinforce our belief in ourselves. Exercise supports healthy brain function and because the mind and body are constantly communicating with one another, what happens at the level of the body is filtered back to the mind and conversely.

Maintaining A Strong Self-Belief

“You have within you right now, everything you need to deal with whatever the world can throw at you.” — Brian Tracy

Finally, we should take the time to recognise our small victories, instead of fixating on the outcome. By being grateful for our current place on our path, we can acknowledge that our growth is always evolving and never at a standstill. Even though our progress may not be happening as we expect, we are moving toward our goals and highest aspirations, regardless. Expressed differently, slow progress is still progress. What we desire may come to pass when we least expect it, as long as we don’t give up and continue working towards our goals. How do you feel about the understanding you have gained so far? Can you see that consistent effort and practice can increase our self-belief and self-confidence? Therefore, we mustn’t give up on our goals when we experience setbacks or difficulties, but continue moving toward them until we achieve them.

Therefore, to maintain a strong self-belief, we must make it a daily habit. We must be consistent in our success habits and not give up on ourselves when things don’t work out as planned. Succeeding in life, no matter if it’s in business, relationships, health, or anything else, depends on the mindset we have when things don’t go as expected. Everyone will feel on top of the world when things are going right, but if you turn the tables and they experience setbacks and disappointments, how do they act in those instances? This determines our self-belief and self-confidence, because we also grow through our disappointments and challenges. It comes down to consistency and maintaining a daily practice that supports our confidence to get the job done. Moreover, self-care is of great importance, particularly our mental health, because we cannot leave these things to chance or ignore them. It is too important to our overall success that we treat ourselves kindly and compassionately.

Considering this, I invite you to reflect on the areas of your life where you are lacking self-belief and self-confidence. Is it related to your career, finances, health, or relationships? How can you improve in these areas? What practices or habits would you need to undertake to support your personal success in these areas? More importantly, are you willing to undertake these practices consistently until you see improvements? Ultimately, only you can answer this question, and it may take some soul-searching to decide if you are prepared to invest in yourself. After all, if we want to become the person we truly desire to be, we must persistently cultivate our self-confidence in order to strengthen our self-belief.

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Unleashing The Unstoppable: How To Build Unwavering Belief Through Persistence And Faith

The Importance Of Persistence And Faith

“The difference between a successful person and others is not a lack of strength, not a lack of knowledge, but rather a lack of will.” — Vince Lombardi

Most people don’t have enough trust in themselves to pursue their goals. They subscribe to the belief if they can’t see it; it doesn’t exist. But faith is believing in the intangible and maintaining an unyielding confidence that what you desire will be brought to life. Similarly, believing that our aspirations will come to life if we are patient is necessary to achieve our goals. Persistence means maintaining an unwavering mindset, no matter how difficult the challenge, until we reach our goal.

Why is it essential to keep striving and having faith in yourself to achieve a goal or purpose you might ask? If we have a burning ambition for something, life will not give it to us without effort. Nothing of value and importance comes with ease. We must not only be determined in our pursuit of our goals, but also have a strong faith that our efforts will bring our plans to fruition. Perseverance and faith give each other confidence, and together they are an unstoppable force. Faith is the cornerstone upon which persistence moves in and through the power of momentum, it drives us to pursue our goal. We must have faith to stay the course, or else we will lose hope in our efforts and give up out of fear that success is unattainable.

Therefore, how can we cultivate persistence to achieve our goals? First, we ought to have an empowering purpose for why we are pursuing our goal. In other words, the action must come from a place of deep, intrinsic motivation. For instance, if it is your goal to start a non-profit foundation that benefits people in your community, it is certain you will experience obstacles and challenges that stand in the way of achieving it. However, if your aim is grounded in a powerful WHY, no matter the obstacles or challenges, you will achieve your primary aim. Put another way, the goal is too important to give up on, and the challenges become a way to cultivate strength and courage. Are you content with this understanding so far? Think of a recent goal that failed and consider whether you were persistent in your efforts, as well as holding an unbreakable faith? If not, I trust by the close of this article you will have a better understanding of how to infuse your future goals with faith and persistence.

Cultivating Persistence to Achieve Goals

“The only limit to our realization of tomorrow will be our doubts of today.” — Franklin D. Roosevelt

So, how can we build persistence if we are lacking in this quality? First, it’s important we set achievable goals. Not that the goals should be small but that we work towards them, knowing we are likely to achieve them with persistent effort. Second, we ought to focus on the process and not the outcome. In other words, we shouldn’t chase success but pursue excellence because success is a by-product of excellence. I understand it may be difficult to fully appreciate this idea, especially when we have been taught to have a goal and keep working towards it until we reach it. But I’m suggesting, if we focus on the process, we build the skills, and means that cultivate a better outcome.

Similarly, we ought to create a solid plan and stick to it no matter the challenges or obstacles we face. A plan is essential for a builder to construct a house, as it acts as a blueprint for the entire project. The plan may comprise the smallest details, such as the trimmings on the doors, or the bigger details such as the foundations and the position the house sits in the lot. It is also of great importance we keep a positive attitude because assuredly, life will not always go as planned. As alluded to earlier, we will experience setbacks and delays when pursuing our goals. In fact, the bigger the goal, the greater the challenges we will experience. If we keep this in mind, knowing our goal is too important to give up on, we are likely to succeed if we are persistent and develop an unyielding faith.

Striving For Success With Unwavering Belief

“You just can’t beat the person who never gives up.” — Babe Ruth

Having explored the methods for enhancing perseverance, how can we cultivate trust in our life’s journey? First, we must develop an empowering mindset that, no matter the obstacles or challenges, we will persist until our intended objective comes to life. Life’s challenges can be overwhelming, and the feeling of despondence that follows can be difficult to push away; making it hard to stay focused and motivated. But this is where we can cultivate a sense of gratitude and focus on the smaller wins. Put simply, we mustn’t focus on the obstacles that stand in our way, but direct our attention to what works favourably. Is this something you could do? Could you shift your attention away from your disappointments and persist, even when things look bleak? It may not be a simple decision to make, but it is one you will look upon favourably when you have achieved your goal.

Equally, it’s essential that we trust in ourselves and our potential to make our goals a reality. Unquestionably, doubts will seep into our consciousness when pursuing our goals. It is natural to entertain doubt, but we mustn’t stay mired in our doubts for too long. Doubt is useful feedback because it is alerting us to the importance of our goal. However, we must use it to fuel our faith and practise persistence despite the difficulties we face. Deciding is never easy, particularly when your hard work and efforts cannot yield the desired results. But I am a firm believer, we must call on other faculties such as visualisation and harness the power of our subconscious mind to create our intended reality in our mind’s eye. I have been engaging in this exercise for more than a decade, feeling the strength and power it provides.

Ultimately, when we build faith and persistence, we create an unwavering belief in our ability to achieve our intended goal. The metaphor of a “rolling stone gathers no moss” is a worn-out one, but it illustrates the notion that momentum is a potent tool and we need to use it in the right way and not let it go to waste. That is to say, we must keep moving and use the energy of momentum in our favour, particularly when we experience setbacks or failures. Actions are spurred on by a relentless force. Our momentum carries us forward, fuelling our faith that whatever we need will arrive in its own time. Considering this, I invite you to reflect on previous goals that were lacking in faith and persistence. If you must, sit down and list all the ways in which you can apply more endurance and conviction to attain these goals. What processes or actions could you take consistently to help you fulfil your goal? After all, if we are persistent and cling to an unwavering belief that we will achieve our goal, then nothing can stand in the way of it.

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The Ultimate Act Of Self-Love: How To Embrace Discipline To Achieve Your Goals

The Connection Between Discipline And Self-Love

“Self-discipline is self-caring. When you say yes to self-discipline, you’re loving yourself enough to say no to things that are not healthy for your mind, your body, your spirit, or your life’s mission.” — Steve Maraboli

Are you renowned for your self-discipline? What does discipline mean to you? How do you stay disciplined during difficult times? What if I told you the ultimate act of self-love is not about indulging in our pleasures, but about embracing discipline? I believe discipline is an act of self-love because it strengthens our ties to uphold our greatest virtues. In other words, it is the foundation upon which we build our success and the guiding force that keeps us on track to achieve our goals.

Think about a river. At first glance, it may seem like a wild, untamed force of nature, with no rhyme or reason to its flow. But on closer inspection, we appreciate there is a method to its madness. The river has banks, which guide its flow and prevent it from spreading out too far. The banks are the discipline that keeps the river on course. In the same way, discipline is the bank that guides our flow, preventing us from spreading out too far and losing sight of our goals. It is the force that keeps us on course, even when the waters get rough. Self-love means honouring ourselves and doing what is necessary to grow as a person. Therefore, self-love is the greatest act of personal growth we can undertake because it helps us achieve long-term success. We must first construct the foundation that will provide the basis for the practice of self-love for personal growth to happen.

A common misunderstanding of discipline is that it is viewed as an unfavourable trait. People contend that being disciplined; we become robotic in nature, which takes the fun and enjoyment out of life. But we are looking at it from a limited perspective. Discipline is one of the most powerful tools to express self-love because it enables us to pursue our goals with determination and focus. Discipline is the force that keeps us going when things get tough. It is the grit and determination we need to push through the hard times. Having discipline is like having a roadmap that guides us towards a better version of ourselves in the future. For example, if your goal is to improve your health, you might form a habit of exercising regularly to create a happier, healthier, and more fulfilling life. Therefore, by being disciplined to exercise daily, even when you don’t feel like it, you are committing to your long-term health and success. In other words, you are delaying short-term gratification for long-term rewards. Does this make sense so far? Do you realise that paying attention to the smallest habits and daily actions can assist you in maintaining your commitment towards your goals?

So what are the benefits of being disciplined? There are obviously many, including increased productivity, better decision-making and an enhanced mental and physical health. We can achieve a lot by being disciplined because we are focused on the long game instead of short-term satisfaction. Put differently, self-discipline helps us build self-confidence, inner strength, and a defined sense of purpose. In fact, there is scientific evidence and research that supports the importance of discipline to achieve long-term success. For instance, those who commit to writing their goals daily have a higher chance of achieving their goals compared to those who don’t write their goals. This is because we are creating powerful neural networks in the brain and, through repetition, those networks become reinforced.

How To Embrace Discipline In Your Life

“It was character that got us out of bed, commitment that moved us into action, and discipline that enabled us to follow through.” — Zig Ziglar

So how can we embrace discipline to achieve our goals? To start, we must know why the goal is of great importance to us. By creating a deeper purpose for our goal, we infuse it with the right emotions to help us achieve the goal and commit to the habits to get there. Hence, why it is important to set clear goals and create a routine that helps us achieve them. This doesn’t mean we will always hit the mark because life gets in the way and unforeseen circumstances may derail our progress. But if our goal is important to us, we must push past the obstacles and continue working towards our goal. Often, we may experience setbacks, such as procrastination and self-doubt. This is a common feeling, and even the most acclaimed athletes have experienced this. However, if they are committed to their goal, they will find a way around it and draw on their inner resources to overcome the short-term setbacks.

Is this idea resonating with you so far? Are you beginning to understand why the best form of self-care is to be disciplined and dedicated to your goals, because if they are important to you, you will reach them? Achieving your goals and mastering your own destiny means that you can have the life you have always dreamed of. But we can only accomplish this by establishing the foundations and support systems to make that success possible. Self-love comes from being disciplined to show up and stay committed to your goals, mainly when you don’t feel motivated. It requires showing up with discipline, passion and dedication and remaining purposeful about your goals. There may be times when you feel uninspired or doubtful about your goals and this requires self-enquiry to understand why these feelings are surfacing. It is not an excuse to abandon your goals for fear of failure.

So could you do it? Are you willing to develop a stronger sense of self-love and commit to your goals with passion and enthusiasm? If not, what is standing in your way? What will it take to achieve the goals and desires you hold deep inside of you? Are you waiting for inspiration to strike? Are you waiting for the perfect time to work towards your goals? Don’t wait for the perfect time or opportunity because it may never come. I assure you, life gets in the way and suddenly time has passed and your goals have fallen by the wayside. Moreover, you will have lost the spark of passion and enthusiasm you once had towards your goals. It’s all about momentum. Momentum drives action. Momentum is infused with power, energy and motion and hence why is it important to keep momentum on your side. Don’t lose sight of your goals, but keep the momentum moving, especially when you don’t feel like taking action. Do something small that keeps momentum working for you.

Considering this, I invite you to write in your journal or diary the areas of your life where you are lacking discipline. It might be your health, finances, career, or relationships. Write a specific goal for each area you would like to achieve. For instance, if you want a better job that pays more than you are currently earning, what is a goal that will help you achieve this? Now, working backwards, what actions and habits do you need to undertake to achieve this goal? It might involve working with a recruitment agency or updating your resume. Perhaps it involves improving your professional skills. Whatever it is, identify it and become more disciplined to achieve this goal. Infuse it with powerful emotions because it is shown that energising emotions associated with your goal, increase the chances of achieve it. After all, cultivating discipline to accomplish your goals is the ultimate demonstration of self-love, as it allows us to reach our highest potential.

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How Adversity And Unforgiving Conditions Can Nurture Personal Growth And Development

Your Personal Growth Matters

“Your personal growth is the only thing that matters. You own and write your story; no one else does. Believe in your unique step up the stairs.” — Brittany Burgunder

When faced with a choice during adversity, we must choose one that will promote our personal growth instead of taking the easy way out. Whilst I concede the easier choice can be less complicated than enduring pain and suffering, it might not be the best decision. You see, we mustn’t leave our personal growth to chance, otherwise we will regret not abiding by our values. Choices aligned with our personal growth are seldom easy, yet are worth it because of the investment in ourselves.

Every choice we make draws us closer to the person we intend to become, or further away. Choices are our barometer for navigating life, so we must avoid making ones that are easy now but difficult later. The single biggest thing we can do is to become someone of character, even when others don’t notice. Character relates to the relationship we have with ourselves foremost. Sometimes we won’t know how resilient we are until it counts. It is during these times our inner resolve will be known, hence the purpose of our growth.

Consider personal growth as insurance we draw on, but something that is stockpiled the more we engage it. For example, the Navy SEALs train for years and may be called upon for active duty in rare situations. However, they hone their mental and physical training knowing nothing can be left to chance. We should apply the same discipline and dedication to our personal growth and be meticulous in choosing growth over the simple path.

Are you comfortable with this idea that cultivating your personal growth is paramount to overcoming life challenges? I trust you get the impression that your personal growth matters, even when others cannot see evidence of it. You are always making choices, even when you can’t decide that is still a choice. Consider the following questions when you find yourself conflicted between two choices and unable to decide:

Will I regret this decision later on?Am I upholding my values and integrity?What will I gain by making this decision?What will I lose by making this decision?

Sometimes, it will require stepping out of our comfort zone when making important choices. Sometimes, it will mean being uncomfortable or embarrassed before our peers, family, and friends. Sometimes, it will mean making choices that offer no return or appease someone to bring peace to a situation. In these instances, we are choosing our personal growth and reinforcing our strength of character. Sometimes we are required to take risks which may conflict with our self-esteem and personal character. However, it is unwise to trade in our values, since that is the one accurate measure we cannot rebuild.

Choose The Path Of Good Moral Character

“Character is the foundation stone upon which one must build to win respect. Just as no worthy building can be erected on a weak foundation, so no lasting reputation worthy of respect can be built on a weak character.” — R.C. Samsel

For instance, In March 2018, the Australian cricket team made the news for the wrong reasons regarding the ball tampering fiasco. Three players, including the team captain and vice-captain, brought the team and country into disrepute by tampering with the cricket ball during the match to win the game. It was caught on camera and three players, including the team captain, were stood down.

We’ve seen similar actions across many sports, including cycling where disgraced cyclist Lance Armstrong was stripped of his seven Tour de France victories. Whilst their actions will be long forgotten and forgiven in time, they will always be remembered as less than sporting heroes for their actions. Not all of us will face making such choices, though it shows how our actions have a ripple effect. For that reason, we must choose the path of betterment and excellence because it is lined with moral character. If we deviate from this path, it may be impossible to navigate our way back.

Many people experience problems in their lives because they choose the easy path. Everyone is looking for shortcuts, whether it be in business, health, finance or relationships. The craving for success without committing oneself to the task is an attractive undertaking many go in search of. As you know, what comes quickly may not be long-lasting. Choosing personal growth means investing in others before our needs are met, which reinforces our character.

If you walk away with one key point from this article, it is this: Always choose actions that move you closer to the person you want to become, even if it means walking away from something you aim to profit from. Moral character and values are scarce nowadays, since many are unwilling to invest in themselves. We have become a throwaway society with less-than-optimal values and character. It’s rare to meet a person with strong values because most people are lured by the notion of: “What’s in it for me?” What’s in it for you may not be what’s in it for others.

Personal growth will require you to put others before you, so it matters in the long run. It’s what Stephen Covey talked about in The 7 Habits Of Highly Effective People, in Habit 5: Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood. We must decide what’s important to us and follow the principles as best we can. We pursue character and integrity as our highest moral code, if that is who we intend to be. Choosing the path of good moral character can be a lonely road because not all people walk the path, so we will be required to walk it alone. We must do so anyway. The one key principle is the relationship we have with ourselves, which cannot be taken from us. Therefore, we must guard it fiercely, so we grow into someone we can be proud of.

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Master Your Destiny: The Secret To Shaping Your Reality Through The Power Of Conscious Intentions

“What you believe to be true, is what you create as your reality.” — Unknown

Do you feel yourself going through the motions in life, lacking purpose and direction? Do you constantly strive for more, yet never feeling fulfilled? The good news is that you have the power to shape your reality and create the life you desire. The secret to unlocking this power lies in the practice of conscious intention.

What Is Conscious Intention?

Conscious intention is the deliberate act of directing your thoughts, beliefs, and actions towards a desired outcome. It is the act of setting a clear and specific goal, and intentionally aligning your thoughts, feelings, and actions with that goal. This process creates a powerful energy that attracts experiences, people, and opportunities that align with your desired outcome.

Why Is Conscious Intention So Powerful?

The reason conscious intention is so powerful is that our thoughts, beliefs, and actions have a profound impact on shaping our reality. Our thoughts and beliefs influence the way we see the world, and they dictate our actions. When we are intentional about our thoughts, beliefs, and actions, we can create a reality that aligns with our desired outcome.

How To Practise Conscious Intention

The practice of conscious intention begins with setting a clear and specific goal, which is something you truly desire and aligns with your values and beliefs. Once you have set your goal, it is important to align your thoughts and beliefs with this goal. This means focussing on positive and supportive thoughts, and eliminating negative and limiting beliefs.

Next, it is important to take intentional actions towards your goal. This means taking action that is aligned with your goal and supports the energy of your intention. Similarly, it’s important to be flexible and open to new opportunities and experiences that align with your goal. Finally, it’s imperative to cultivate gratitude and celebrate your progress. When you focus on the positive aspects of your life, you attract more positive experiences and opportunities, which helps to maintain a positive and supportive energy that aligns with your desired outcome.

Why Conscious Intention Is The Key To Shape Your Reality

“The power of your thoughts and intentions is the most potent tool you have for shaping your reality.” — Unknown

Conscious intention is the secret to shaping your reality because it allows you to create a powerful energy that attracts experiences, people, and opportunities that align with your desired outcome. This powerful energy can help you overcome obstacles and challenges and create a life that is fulfilling and meaningful.

By focusing your thoughts and actions on your desired outcome, you send a clear message to the universe about what you want in your life. This message is received and acted upon, attracting experiences and opportunities that align with your desired outcome. Think about it, have you ever noticed how things seem to fall into place when you are intentional about what you want in your life? This is the power of conscious intention at work.

The Benefits Of Conscious Intention

“Your thoughts become your words, your words become your actions, and your actions shape your reality.” — Mahatma Gandhi

The benefits of practising conscious intention are many. Here are just a few:

1. Clarity And Purpose

When you set a clear and specific goal, you gain a sense of clarity and purpose in your life. This helps you to focus your thoughts, beliefs, and actions on what truly matters to you, allowing you to create a life that is fulfilling and meaningful.

2. Overcoming Obstacles

The powerful energy of conscious intention can help you overcome obstacles and challenges in your life. This energy can help you stay focused on your goal, even in the face of adversity.

3. Attracting Positive Experiences

When you focus your thoughts, beliefs, and actions on your desired outcome, you attract positive experiences and opportunities into your life. This can help you create a reality that is filled with joy, happiness, and abundance.

4. Improved Relationships

Conscious intention can help to improve your relationships. When you are intentional about what you want in your life, you attract people who align with your goals and values. This can lead to deeper and more meaningful relationships.

5. Increased Self-Awareness

The practice of conscious intention can also increase your self-awareness. When you are intentional about your thoughts, beliefs, and actions, you gain a deeper understanding of who you are and what you want in life. This can help you make more informed and deliberate choices, leading to a more fulfilling life.

Therefore, conscious intention is the secret to shaping your reality and creating a fulfilling and meaningful life. By setting a clear and specific goal, aligning your thoughts and beliefs, taking intentional actions, and cultivating gratitude, you create a powerful energy that attracts experiences, people, and opportunities that align with your desired outcome.

So, are you ready to take control of your life and shape your reality through the power of conscious intention? If so, set a clear and specific goal, focus your thoughts and beliefs on this goal, take intentional actions, and cultivate gratitude. Start small and watch as your life transforms in ways you never thought possible. Ask yourself, what do you truly desire in life? What is your goal? And more importantly, are you ready to shape your reality through the power of conscious intention?

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Harnessing The Power Of Desires: How To Manifest Your Intentions And Attract What You Want

Desires can be a powerful force in our lives, yet many of us struggle to understand how to use our desires to our advantage. We often want something without knowing how to make it happen, or feel as though our desires are unattainable. In this article, I’d like to explore the power of desires, how to harness them, and how to attract what you want in life.

What Are Desires?

“Thoughts are mental energy; they’re the currency that you have to attract what you desire. Learn to stop spending that currency on thoughts you don’t want.” — Wayne Dyer

Desires are what we want and hope for in our lives. They can be small or large, practical or impractical. They can range from wanting a new car to finding true love. Desires reflect our values, hopes, and dreams, and they can be a powerful source of motivation and direction. When we know what we truly want, we can focus our energy and efforts on making it come to life. However, many people struggle to identify and articulate their desires. The first step in unlocking the power of desires is to truly understand what we want and why. This can be a difficult process and requires taking an honest look at ourselves and our lives. To do this, we must first recognise and acknowledge our deepest wants and needs. We must also be willing to delve into what motivates us and what we truly value in life.

Understand The Power Of Desires

“Definiteness of purpose is the starting point of all achievement.” — W. Clement Stone

Once we have identified our desires, we can understand the power they have over us. Our desires can shape our thoughts, choices, and actions. They can also have a profound impact on our emotions and our overall wellbeing. By understanding and harnessing the power of our desires, we can use them to create positive changes in our lives. For example, if we want to land our dream job, we must put in the work to make it happen. This could mean taking classes, networking, and applying for jobs. We must be determined and willing to do whatever it takes to reach our goal. By understanding and recognising the power of our desires, we can use them to create a life of purpose and fulfilment.

Similarly, harnessing our desires begins with understanding what we want in life. This can be a difficult process, as it requires looking within ourselves and identifying our deepest values, hopes, and dreams. It also requires being honest about our wants and needs, and to distinguish between what we want and what we need. Once we have identified our desires, we can harness their power to get what we want. To do this, we must focus our energy and efforts on making our desires a reality. This could mean setting goals, taking action, and making adjustments to our lifestyle and habits. It also requires putting in the work and to stay determined in the face of any obstacles we encounter.

Learn To Distinguish Between Wanting And Needing

“Sometimes we are so focused on what we want, we miss the things we need.” — Unknown

In manifesting our desires, it is important to distinguish between wanting and needing. Our wants are often driven by our emotions, while our needs are driven by practical and logical needs. For instance, if we want a new car, we must be able to articulate why we need it and how it will help us in our lives. To determine if something is a want or a need, we must examine our motivations for wanting it. Is this something that will truly make us happy and fulfilled, or is it a fleeting desire driven by emotion? We must be honest and realistic about our wants and needs to harness the power of our desires.

Overcome Resistance To Manifest Your Desires

I realise this may sound obvious, but harnessing our desires requires us to take action. Often, we can be held back by fear and resistance. We may be afraid of failure or of not achieving our goals. To overcome this resistance, we must confront our fears and push past our comfort zone. We must take risks to challenge ourselves to reach our goals. We must also be willing to embrace failure as part of the process, and to learn from our mistakes. When we can overcome our resistance and take action, we can manifest our desires and make them a reality. Are you happy with these ideas so far? Are you willing to examine your desires and consider why having them will make you happy? I assure you, this exercise will help you gain clarity on what you want vs what you need to make you happy.

Besides understanding and harnessing the power of our desires, it is important to apply life lessons to understand how to attract what we want. Life lessons are valuable lessons we learn from our experiences and from the people in our lives. They can help us understand ourselves, our motivations, and our desires. By applying life lessons to our desires, we can gain a better understanding of how to make them a reality. We can also learn to recognise our strengths and weaknesses, and to use them to our advantage. Life lessons can be a powerful tool for manifesting our desires and creating the life we truly want.

Create An Action Plan To Manifest Your Intentions

“Create a definite plan for carrying out your desire and begin at once, whether you are ready or not, to put this plan into action.” — Napoleon Hill

Once we have identified our desires, we can create an action plan to manifest them. This can help us stay focused and motivated about our goals. It can also help us break down our goals into achievable steps and to stay on track. To create an action plan, we must set achievable goals and create a timeline for achieving them. We must also be willing to make adjustments and to stay determined in the face of obstacles we may encounter. When we have an action plan in place, we can manifest our desires and make them a reality.

After all, desires can be a powerful force, yet many people struggle to understand how to use their desires to get what they want. By understanding and harnessing the power of our desires, we can use them to create positive changes in our lives. This requires being honest and realistic about our wants and needs, and to distinguish between wanting and needing. We must also be willing to take action to apply life lessons to our advantage. When we can do this, we can manifest our desires and create the life we truly want. Harnessing the power of our desires is a powerful tool for creating a life of purpose, fulfilment, and joy. Are you ready to harness the power of your desires? If so, I invite you to take the first step and create an action plan to manifest your intentions today.

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Finding Your Balance: The Power of Being Okay With What Happens, And What Doesn’t

Life is full of difficulties, successes and failures, and moments of joy and sorrow. It can be challenging to find the balance between these two extremes and be okay with what happens and what doesn’t. But it is possible to develop the power to accept both the positive and negative aspects of life without getting overwhelmed by them. By accepting the circumstances of life, we can create a life full of contentment, peace, and balance. By developing self-awareness, creating healthy boundaries, and engaging in empowering self-talk, it is possible to cultivate the power of being comfortable with whatever life brings.

What Is The Power Of Acceptance?

“Accept the things to which fate binds you, and love the people with whom fate brings you together, but do so with all your heart.” — Marcus Aurelius

Accepting what happens is a way of thinking that can help you handle both the positive and negative aspects of life more easily. It means being able to accept what comes your way, regardless of whether you are pleased or disappointed about it. And it also means being able to let go of things that disappoint you without getting stuck in that feeling of disappointment.

Being okay with what happens involves cultivating a sense of openness. This means being able to stay engaged in life, but without attaching your self-worth to any specific result. Acceptance means you can enjoy the good things that come your way without feeling guilty about not doing more. And when you experience a disappointment, you don’t get stuck in that feeling of failure. You can let it go and move forward. Are you comfortable with this understanding that you can allow life to flow through you instead of clutching to your disappointments?

Developing Self-Awareness

“Self-awareness is the ability to take an honest look at your life without any attachment to it being right or wrong, good or bad.” — Debbie Ford

When you’re feeling content, happy, and balanced, you’re in a state of acceptance. This is often referred to as being self-aware. When you’re in this state, you are more likely to respond to life in a way that is healthy and beneficial to you. But because these moments are not constant, you can use various tools to help you stay in a state of acceptance. Being aware of your positive and negative emotions, as well as the thoughts and beliefs that accompany them, is an important aspect of developing self-awareness. When you can notice how you feel in the present moment, you respond to these emotions in a more supportive way.

For example, if you notice you feel frustrated, it is helpful to know that it is normal to feel that way when you experience frustration. You can use this awareness to release the frustration in a healthy way. And if you notice you are experiencing sadness, you can use your awareness to explore why you felt that way. By exploring your emotions and thoughts without judgement, you identify patterns and triggers that are contributing to your negative emotions. This can help you respond more effectively to these emotions in the future.

Creating Healthy Boundaries

“Daring to set boundaries is about having the courage to love ourselves, even when we risk disappointing others.” — Brene Brown

Setting healthy boundaries helps you to stay in a state of acceptance of what life brings. When you have healthy boundaries, you can enjoy the positive things that come into your life, but you can also let go of the things that don’t. You can enjoy your relationships and friendships, but you can also let go of relationships and friendships that don’t bring you the joy and fulfilment that you deserve. When you have healthy boundaries, you can say no to things that you don’t have the energy to do, you can say yes to things that bring you joy, and you can walk away from toxic relationships.

Having healthy boundaries helps you to avoid getting overwhelmed by the negative aspects of life. When you can set healthy boundaries, you can protect your energy without feeling guilty. You can say no to things that you don’t have the capacity to do, and you can walk away from unhealthy relationships. Healthy boundaries allow you to feel more content and peaceful. They also help you avoid getting stuck in the emotions that go along with feeling guilty about not doing enough, or being around people who drain you of your energy.

Learning To Accept What Is

“Acceptance looks like a passive state, but in reality, it brings something entirely new into this world. That peace, a subtle energy vibration, is consciousness.” — Eckhart Tolle

Accepting what is constitutes an important aspect of welcoming life. When you accept what is, you can let go of the things that disappoint you and move forward in your life without feeling stuck in that feeling of disappointment. This can be challenging, especially when you are experiencing a lot of discontent in your life. It is helpful to remind yourself that it is normal to experience some displeasure in your life, even when you are doing your best.

It is also helpful to remember that you don’t control what happens to you or how other people behave. What you have control over is how you respond to these things. If a situation disappoints you, it is helpful to recognise that you have the power to let go of disappointment. You have the power to release those feelings and find contentment in what is in your life.

Cultivating Gratitude

“Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow.” — Melody Beattie

Cultivating gratitude is another important aspect of accepting the circumstances of life. When you cultivate gratitude, you can enjoy the good things that come into your life and you can let go of the things that don’t. When you cultivate gratitude, you can respond to your emotions in a more helpful way. You can enjoy the emotions that arise, but you can also release them when they have served their purpose. You can enjoy the things that you have to do, but you can also let go of the things you don’t enjoy.

Cultivating gratitude is important because it is choosing to look at your challenges differently. It is choosing to focus on other aspects of your life which you are abundantly grateful for. Considering this, take a moment and write in your diary or journal what aspects of life you are resisting at the present time. Why do you think you are resisting these experiences? What are you hoping for instead? Could there be a greater lesson embedded in these experiences that you are running away from? I don’t know the answers, and neither will you until you take the time to explore your inner world. After all, finding your balance is about learning to accept the conditions of life as they are and surfing the waves of discontentment, without conceding to it.

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We Spend A Lot Of Time Trying To Fix Ourselves And Forget We Decided We Are Broken

How To Experience Yourself As A Soul

“The soul is the truth of who we are.” — Marianne Williamson

I’d like to ask you some questions which I hope you will answer after reading this article. If you keep a diary or journal, I invite you to write your answers there because this could be a healing exercise to help you gain greater understanding of yourself. Okay, let’s begin. Do you see yourself as broken in any way? Have you ever been told you are less than perfect? How would you describe your inner dialogue? For instance, are you critical of yourself? Do you judge aspects of your character or physical qualities and wish it were different? What does the term broken mean to you? What does the concept of wholeness mean to you?

I know there’s a lot to think about, but if you answer the questions thoughtfully, it will expand your understanding of yourself. It’s no secret that many people spend their entire life trying to fix themselves so they can be happier. For example, they might work with a therapist or a counsellor, join a gym, or follow a restricted diet to lose weight. And don’t get me wrong, I’m not discounting the value of these pursuits because they are worthwhile. What I’m suggesting is that if we are constantly trying to fix ourselves, who is deciding they need fixing? In other words, are your actions about self-improvement or the need to fix yourself?

In my experience coaching clients, it is we who decide we are broken based on a false perception we are not good enough. So, we undertake the journey of fixing aspects of ourselves so we can like who we are. Regrettably, it seldom works as we planned because there is always something to fix, something to heal and something to transform. Our life is never complete and no matter how long we live, our job of self-improvement is never complete. We will never get the work done in one lifetime because we are limited in how much we can do to improve ourselves. My impression is that we ought to embrace who we are now, knowing we are whole and perfect as we are.

Expressed differently: we are spiritual beings having an earthly experience and therefore, spirit does not identify itself with being broken or flawed. That is, as a soul, our brokenness is not identifiable to our higher self. It is our egoic mind that identifies with the concept of being flawed. Does this make sense? Can you see that who you are as a person is not who you are as a soul? Therefore, if we can see ourselves as a soul, instead of flesh and bones, we can relate to ourselves through the eyes of love and compassion. In fact, we can extend this idea to how we see others. I’m not saying it will be easy, but each of us has a soulful quality and if we can connect with that part of another person, we can see past their difficulties.

Perfection And Wholeness Are Our Core Nature

“Wholeness does not mean perfection: it means embracing brokenness as an integral part of life.” — Parker J. Palmer

So, if we want to transform ourselves from brokenness to wholeness, we must relate to ourselves through the lens of love. As you know, love knows no bounds or limits. Love does not place restrictions or judgement on who we are, but embraces who we are becoming. We are a work in progress and, as alluded to earlier, our work of self-improvement will never be completed in this lifetime. We can move the needle so far and we ought to be grateful to overcome our challenges so we can become a better version of ourselves. I liken it to painting a masterpiece and devoting our entire life to the task. We might add subtle brushstrokes here and there to create an impression of who we’d like to be. If you’ve read the book by author Irving Stone titled: The Agony And The Ecstasy, the Italian Renaissance painter and sculptor Michelangelo spent most of his life creating countless masterpieces. For instance, it took him five years to paint the Sistine chapel. His work was one of devotion to beauty and a higher calling, and I invite you to adopt a similar approach to your life. Make your life a devotion to honour the beauty of your soul’s nature.

Is this something you’re willing to give your attention to? Could you stop trying to constantly fix yourself and decide you are perfect as you are? This change in thinking can transform your life. It requires seeing yourself through the eyes of love and compassion instead of criticism and judgement. Let’s be real here. I’m not implying each of us is perfect and whole as human beings because we have faults and insecurities. I’m suggesting, as soul beings, perfection and wholeness are our core nature. When we identify with these qualities, we can embody this on a cellular level. We can bring these qualities into existence by changing our consciousness because, as Albert Einstein once said: “We cannot solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them.” We transcend our thinking and create a new awareness in which to relate to ourselves.

This is the essence of this article; to embody the qualities as a soul. And how will you recognise this true nature I speak of? It is vested in purity, love, peace, joy, bliss, wisdom, and perfection, to name a few. Therefore, I invite you to focus on these qualities, through practices like meditation or journaling and bring them into your being. How can you do this? Let’s take the quality of peace, for example. Try to be more peaceful in the way you communicate with others. You might choose to be less judgemental and critical of other people. You might stop gossiping about others and model yourself to those who embody peace. People like the Dalai Lama or the late Vietnamese Buddhist Monk Thích Nhất Hạnh. Look at someone you can relate to as the embodiment of peace because if that quality exists in them, it is certain you can embody those qualities, too.

Considering this, I invite you to answer the questions in the opening paragraph in your journal or diary. You needn’t complete this in one sitting, so take your time over a week or longer if necessary. Come back to it often and add to your answers. The clearer you become about who you’d like to be, the more clarity you gain to transcend the limitations of perceiving yourself as broken. Start by coming home to yourself and getting to know who you are as a soul being and the rest are details. After all, if we spend a lot of time trying to fix ourselves because we have decided we are broken, then we have the power to decide we are whole and perfect.

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