Akosua Dardaine Edwards's Blog, page 65
August 19, 2020
How Are You? Really?
If you are a person who resists change, these COVID times have probably been difficult for you. If you are a person who needs to control things in your environment, likely, you too find these times challenging. Whatever the case may be for you, inside of your discomfort, disquiet, irritation, and restlessness there is information waiting to be to be seen and acknowledged. Tina Lifford
Yesterday someone asked me "How are you? and please don't give me your standard I am good response" I thought about it for a moment. I asked her about what she said to me.
She said, I usually give a few standard replies to that question so she never really knows how I really am really feeling or doing.
When I thought about my responses, I realized that it a combination of holding back on negativity and wanting to make affirmations of positivity.
Words have power, my words are prayers I truly believe that, so I am mindful of what I say and how I say it. Sometimes I slip up, especially when angered and triggered. When I do, I recognise the triggers and acknowledge the anger. Anger is also useful, as a guide that something needs to be looked at or changed. Our response to anger is a whole other story, a whole other lesson!
Having that conversation made me realise that I can use words to say how I really feel that are mindful and not negative rather than a default to I am good.
Tina Lifford says "The best way to see what needs to be seen in your life is to first realize that behind your feelings, whatever they may be (positive and joyful or negative and sad), are thoughts that drive you to see your Self in a particular way."
Seeing the self and knowing the self is the most authentic way to show up in the world. Your responses are grounded in who you are, rather than fleeting.The way you see your Self is the real source of your emotional experience, not the events to which you attribute your feelings.
I see myself as positive, as an affirmation of good, as a thank you note to the Universe.
How do you see yourself? And
How are you? Really?
Peace
August 17, 2020
Simple Reminders of Growth
to whom this may concern;sometimes, searching for old feelings in old places won't make you feel like your old self again. sometimes, accepting that you’ve shed old skin and that you’re deserving of a better version than your older self is what will make you feel like you again. Billy Chapata
It is always a lesson and a reminder to me when I bump into someone from my past. People who either knew me before now and dropped out of my life, or those who I met along the way and meet ever so often.
The lessons and reminders are sometimes funny and other times I would say brutal because I recognise when I feel triggered.
Reminders to me that I either have grown or still have some growing to do.
Lessons in patience, kindness, and boundaries and most importantly how to not put and keep others in a box, or in the space where I first met them. Just like me, people change and evolve all the time.
It also reminds me to keep moving forward with self compassion and kindness to self, as that extends out to others. To let go and know that uncertainty is not always a bad thing.
Life has a way of bringing the people and signs you need to keep reminding us that everything is fleeting. It is now up to us to pay attention and have enough courage to take the necessary action.
Pay attention to your response when you meet someone from your past, especially the ones that you think that you have totally outgrown.
Peace
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August 15, 2020
Build Up Your Internal Peace
Project your internal peace outward rather than absorbing external chaos inward. A Journey Within
So many happenings in this here 2020! On a daily basis, there are situations and events that pop up which conjures up so many different types of feelings, from uncertainty all the way to fear. It is so easy to get sucked in to all of the negativity. Easy to be bogged down by the uncertainty. The brilliant thing about acknowledging our feelings is that it can guide us, when we feel we can deal then heal. There is no healing without feeling
The other brilliant part is in these times we get to practice how to go within and tap into the peace that we all have. If we cannot find it, we only have to spend some time remembering and re cultivating it.
Put some work into building and re-building your internal peace. Some of the work includes meditation, stillness, spending time with your thoughts, walking in nature, yoga, gardening, less social media especially upon wakening in the morning.
The temptation to react to everything will be less, there will be less of a need to fly off the handle at everything that comes your way, you may also be able to identify your triggers.
And come to a place where there is peace that passes all understanding
Peace!
Put some time into
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August 13, 2020
I am Letting Go of...
1 QUESTION FOR YOU: What am I holding on to that I need to let go of? James Clear
I am letting go of fear of failure.
I am letting go of fear of uncertainty.
I am letting go of not asking for what I want.
I am letting go of clutter.
I am letting go of playing small.
I am letting go of overdoing the chocolate eating.
I am letting go of wanting to control others.
I am letting go of giving unsolicited advice.
I am letting go of ignoring my feelings.
I am letting go of beliefs that no longer serve me.
I am letting go of taking on false responsibilities
Over to you....
Share with me some of what you are letting go of
Peace
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August 12, 2020
When it's time to Move..
When it is time for you to move, to shift, to change, to pivot, to reconnect, to recharge, to change your behaviour, to change your job, to pay attention to your relationships and choices, Life will send you signs. Life loves us so much, she will gently introduce you to situations which nudge you to pay attention. Calmly at first.'A little louder when ignored. When it reaches a full blown crisis in our lives I can safely say that we have been completely ignored and denied the signs given to us by life.What I have learned is that:1. Life loves us.Life loves us to much it gives us the nudges we need. 2. Denial, busyness, justification and rationales will not stop the nudges, it must be faced3. Everything happens FOR us - we may not see it but that is just how it is.4. Feel the feelings, change can be scary, shifting can be uncomfortable, feel it, you are learning something in the feeling.5. Celebrate the small wins.
Have you read any of Akosua's work?What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love
Nyabo (Madam) - Why Are You Here?Daily Lessons on the Journey - A JournalFollow Akosua onTwitterInstagramFacebook
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August 8, 2020
Love Yourself Through it All
Remember that the answer to whatever you're waiting for won't fix you, make you, or change you. As happy as you are right now in the waiting, is relatively similar to the levels of joy you'll feel once the waiting is through. Sit with that for a minute. Maxi McCoy
My lovies, it's been a while. Confessions on the Journey. What a week! It seems that this week's intention was for me to use or recall every single lesson on the Journey.
This week there was a break in where I live and that alone brought it's own feelings, following on from that the perpetrators cleaned out my bank account and Friday was my last day at one of the places I work, then to add on the list, my aunt died while giving birth.. All at once I had to face myself and face the feelings associated with all of these events.
After getting over the initial shock, I knew I had to feel all of the feelings, I had to process my own life which was giving me stories and signs, I had to take stock.
What I did learn during this week is:
1. I have wonderful friends and support. It has always been a challenge for me to ask for support, I did not even have to ask!
2. Things can be replaced, people cannot - pay attention to the things that matter
3. There are people out here who are sometimes desperate and do desperate things, not everyone is on the path of awareness and transformation.
4. There is no shame in asking for support.
5. Be vigilant when I leave the house.
6. Speak more to my neighbours - connect with humans around you, come out of the social media world and off the laptop - it was stolen so what more of a sign do I need?
7. Worry not and this too shall pass'
8. Sleep a super power- after not being able to sleep much this week I have seen how it affected so much of how I operate in this world,
9. Love yourself through it all - I was so mad at myself for leaving the windows open, for not being vigilant, and the list went on. Why beat up on yourself? learn from it and move on.
It feels good to use situations as guides!
Peace
Have you read any of Akosua's work?What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self LoveNyabo (Madam) - Why Are You Here?Daily Lessons on the Journey - A JournalFollow Akosua onTwitterInstagramFacebook
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Join me and 50 other guides at the Empower Summit August 22nd 2020
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August 1, 2020
Journey to Letting Go
“We can't be afraid of change. You may feel very secure in the pond that you are in, but if you never venture out of it, you will never know that there is such a thing as an ocean, a sea. Holding onto something that is good for you now, may be the very reason why you don't have something better.” C Joy Bell
Dear August
We welcome each other on the Journey to Letting Go of:
- Limited beliefs that no longer serve me
- People pleasing
- Shame& Guilt for resting & self care & having fun
- Blaming others & not taking responsibility for our actions & choices
- Outdated status quo ways
- Self doubt
- Judging others, Judging self
- Ungratefulness
- Expired relationships
- Tolerating nonsense & bad behavior
PpPeace
Nyabo (Madam) - Why Are You Here?Daily Lessons on the Journey - A JournalFollow Akosua onTwitterInstagramFacebook
July 31, 2020
Keep An Open Mind
Which of those things is relevant for this current moment in time?
And what’s the absolute smallest thing I can do to put that into action right now? Maxie McCoy
Reflecting on the last few months, I can safely say that I have questioned how relevant my skills, and my vision is within this present moment given where we are in this world.
Why?
A huge part of the life I led before the pandemic was about speaking at conferences, graduations and other events. Where people congregated in a space to connect and share, I would show up and speak or be a part of a panel or connect in any way.Many times, I jumped on a plane to get to the spaces where I would speak to the crowd.
Both of these activities have been put on hold since March of this year with no set time or period for a return to "normal", throwing me into some periods of doubt and uncertainty.It is through this time of uncertainty, I started asking myself, now what? (Which is the title of the next book that I took the time to complete during the time at home!)
Do I change or rearrange the vision? Or do I shift the way I thought the vision would play out?Technology has emerged as another way of reaching the masses, I think it is brilliant having the ability to reach more and more people, all over the world.So, the question I asked myself was - how can we leverage on this period of change, how can I keep my eyes on the vision?The biggest lesson I have learnt is that there must be an open mindedness in changing the how. How we achieve the vision, How we show up. How we embrace change.If I am set on holding on to the old way of doing things because it worked then I miss the opportunity, I stress myself out waiting for it to return to the old way and I become stuck!
Learning to embrace change and keeping an open mind has been some of the most profound lessons on this Journey, as well as, trusting the process and trusting the Universe.
So far, without a doubt, all my needs have been met and I give thanks.
PeaceHave you read any of Akosua's work?What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love
Nyabo (Madam) - Why Are You Here?Daily Lessons on the Journey - A JournalFollow Akosua onTwitterInstagramFacebook
July 29, 2020
Leave room for the unplanned
Confessions on the Journey - not long ago, I absolutely must have had certainty in my life. I needed to KNOW! When someone asked me to do something, to be somewhere, to get involved, to share my time and expertise, they had to come with the knowledge to answer my questions!I wanted certainty.I judged others on their certainly or lack thereof.I wanted to see and hear concrete plans of what was to happen, what was next, who was involved and the end result.Certainty made me feel secure. It made me feel accomplished. I felt that it made my life easier knowing what was to come.I made detailed plans and followed them with laser focus to ensure certainty.Then, life happened.Many of the plans I made never materialized in the way I planned, some went horribly "wrong" and some exceeded my expectations, some blew me away!What I did learn?1. Be open and flexible2. Keep the goal and the vision- lose the how3. Certainty may not always be available to you - what will you do when it's not?4. Many times knowing everything is a reaction due to fear and the ego, being in control - it leaves very little room for patience, self belief and self trust.
Expect the unexpected and know that you can handle itPeace
Have you read any of Akosua's work?What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love
Nyabo (Madam) - Why Are You Here?Daily Lessons on the Journey - A JournalFollow Akosua onTwitterInstagramFacebook
July 28, 2020
Forgiveness is Essential
There are events and people in our past that we still hold on to for many different reasons.On my own journey, I reflected that I held on to views and did not forgive because I wanted to be right. I wanted the other person to be wrong. I also believed that justice was not served.So I stood my ground until that happened.Sometimes it never does. Shall I stay mad or hold on to the pain?
According to Carolyn Myss, genuine forgiveness is a self-initiated mystical act that requires the assistance of grace to release you from the compulsive and often self-righteous chatter of the ego, which continually enforces a position of entitled anger or hurt.
Many of us have been taught that once we are "good", life will reflect that back to us.Newsflash - everyone is not taught that and life is not linear, there are are so many lessons for us to learn in the duality of life. We appreciate heat when we are in the cold for a period of time, we appreciate when the rain comes after a drought
We are taught that our goodness deserves a reward and other people's badness should not be tolerated- most times, they need to pay.
Forgiveness releases us from the past, to move on, to learn from the incident. Forgiveness is about us, a personal act of release. It does not mean you condone what others have done or that you are no longer a good person and will "lose" your rewardIt simply means that you recognize that the past cannot change, that you are ready to move forward with a new slate and are done with the unfinished businesses.Any other choice is one of stress and stagnationPeaceHave you read any of Akosua's work?What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love
Nyabo (Madam) - Why Are You Here?Daily Lessons on the Journey - A JournalFollow Akosua onTwitterInstagramFacebook
