Colleen Brown's Blog, page 138

I used to write all the time! Poems upon poems and stories. But I stopped for a year and now that I want to start again, I've got writer's block and I feel like I've forgotten everything. Any advice?

Oh but love, you haven’t forgotten any of it! It’s all just in files in the back of your mind just waiting to be dusted off. All you have to do is reflect and revisit those memories! Try going to places that you’ve been before that you remember good things from. Listen to music that you love but haven’t listened to in some time! Do things that you used to do but haven’t found the time to do or haven’t realized you stopped doing them! Stay active! That’s what helps me. But what helps me may not help you, but I hope it does! I just always have to think, think and think some more. If I’m not speaking it, I’m thinking it. Or better yet, I’m writing it. Start off simple. Maybe with a little diary entry. Keep writing as much as you can. Even if you think it’s ridiculous. No one has to see it but you. Only when you’re ready should you show it to the world. You will be ready soon, you just have to focus and try. People say writers shouldn’t force themselves, but if you are taking that advice and still not writing, shouldn’t you try something new for a change?

I still want you, and I still wantyour everything. I never stoppedwanting you. Even when yousaid...

I still want you, and I still want
your everything. I never stopped
wanting you. Even when you
said that you no longer wanted
me. But it’s always been like this
for us, hasn’t it? Someone always
longing for someone who doesn’t
even know what it is that they
want and who they will end up
sharing it with. But I don’t care
about how many people you have
loved while I was away because
I still want you, I still want this,
and I will always still want us.

Every day you are one of the only lights in the complete darkness that is my life. I just wish i could know you so you could be even more of a light

Please, tell me who you are. We can grow familiar with one another.

"You’ve heard it so many times before but here it is again: REMOVE EVERYONE IN YOUR LIFE THAT TREATS..."

“You’ve heard it so many times before but here it is again: REMOVE EVERYONE IN YOUR LIFE THAT TREATS YOU LIKE A SECOND CHOICE, AN AFTER THOUGHT, LIKE YOU WERE ONLY CREATED FOR THEIR CONVENIENCE. The people who tell you that are the people who have been through it before. They’re not saying “Give them another chance. Talk to them about how you feel. Did you do something to make them be that way?” No. They are saying remove those people as if they are a stain on your favorite shirt. Delete them. Erase them from your mind like you would a show from your Netflix queue that you know you will never watch. It might be insensitive but who gives a fuck. Obviously they don’t if they treat you like you are disposable. Like you are a gas station that is always open for their convenience. You’ve been friends for years? Good. It gives you a better reason to rid of them. Because if they’ve been doing this to you for years, they knew what they were doing all along. You don’t have to treat them like an enemy, but you also don’t have to treat them like they are your priority, your only responsibility. They don’t seem to have a problem when they are writing you at the bottom of their list of the things to care about in life, so why should you? Why should you be the only one who is constantly making an effort, constantly trying to mend the remaining pieces, constantly trying to keep them in your life. You are not their personal therapist, so stop opening yourself up like one. Stop handing out your love and dedication to those who will only give it to someone else and say that it was their creation, their realization, their struggle. You are fighting your own battle, and if you come across someone who claims to be on your side but always seems to be rooting for the other team, give them your last white flag and tell them to cover up the remnants of what is left of your alliance.”

- "You never needed them," - Colleen Brown

my day was kind of stupid so i made it better with flowers

my day was kind of stupid so i made it better with flowers

"It is never too soon or soon enough for love. It’s always welcome and always desired and always..."

“It is never too soon or soon enough for love. It’s always welcome and always desired and always given in return. And I have a lot of love for you. I have a lot of everything for you. You could tell me you hate me, burn all my letters, cross my name out of every poem and delete me from every network, every memory, every part of your brain, and I would still feel love and tenderness for you. I would always understand why you are doing this to me and to your heart. I will always support you, fight for you, think of you as a light that will never burn out even if the wind is trying it’s best to diminish the flames. If you want to forget me, that’s fine, I understand. But just know that no matter how hard you wish me away, how much you try to forget about me, how many months you spend in your bed next to someone who could care less about what you are dreaming of, I will never forget about you.”

- Colleen Brown

I’m still running aroundin circles trying to figure outwhere it started to go wrong,and where it...

I’m still running around

in circles trying to figure out

where it started to go wrong,

and where it was exactly

that I started to miss

your hearts inevitable need

to distance itself from mine.

"I was never enough for youuntil you were left with nothing,no one to give you love. Am Isupposed..."

“I was never enough for you

until you were left with nothing,

no one to give you love. Am I

supposed to wait around for you

to realize that this is really what

you want, that I am who you want.

I have things I need to do too,

you know. The clock is not

only ticking for you and time

is not waiting for only you to

get it together. You only seemed

to ever want me when my heart

started putting the pieces together,

started noticing that there is

only one person who wants this

at all times, through everything.

So don’t be surprised when you

come back home to a half-empty

house that is filled with only

your belongings, your memories.

Because I have things to do

too and I’m not going to waste

my moments waiting on you

to see that I have always

been more than enough.”

- "I am not your 24 hour convenient store," - Colleen Brown

I read your stuff but Ive noticed that most of your poems are repetitive sometimes to the point of using the same words and some of the verses sound the same as well…no offense at all. sorry for being to blunt?

I don’t think you’re being blunt or offensive! Mostly because I’m not offended. I understand what you’re talking about because I feel that at times. But then again you have to understand that I write everyday and sometimes you will see a repetitiveness within my words. If I wrote every now and then you most likely wouldn’t. But again, it’s all a reflection thing and if I feel something at that specific time, or for a lengthy time, it all kind of ties in together. So check my blog every now and then if you don’t want to see a repetitive tone. But for now, that’s all I can really tell you!

You didn’t want my loveuntil my heart seemed tono longer want you. And now that I am...

You didn’t want my love

until my heart seemed to

no longer want you.

And now that I am finally

moving on from your

memory, you want me

now more than ever.