Colleen Brown's Blog, page 122
October 3, 2014
mostlyfiction:
Ladies:
If there are any women who want to participate in a little photo/poetry...
Ladies:
If there are any women who want to participate in a little photo/poetry collaboration (the photograph being a photograph of you and the poetry being a poem of mine) please message me and I can give you the details!
"We were halfway across the country from each other, but no amount
of miles that were put between us..."
“We were halfway across the country from each other, but no amount
of miles that were put between us could have stopped our love from meeting its flaming curiosity. From miles to hours our love was soon going to explore its strongest desire. Before the alarm on my phone could warn me of his arrival, he appeared on my front doorstep. From friendship to familiarity, my hands against his never felt before body felt like a home without walls and without an overdue rent. For seven days I was in fearless bliss. Using the daylight to explore each others bodies and using the moons rays to open ourselves up and use our new vulnerability to learn the secrets of each others sentimental past life files. I spent seven days in the arms of a once so unreachable stranger. But to him, he spent seven days in the presence of a temporary fix to his curiosity’s high. Just as quickly as he appeared at my doorstep, he disappeared from my arms and my life. From seven days of bliss to several months of silence, our love was no longer wondering, no longer a mystery, no longer separated from distance but from the fulfillment to his own questions. The way my skin might feel against his no longer kept him up at night. He didn’t need to guess anymore because his experiment, his own hypothesis could finally be written in. His conclusion finally complete. He had the answer to his question and it was one that he never intended to skip. But my body, his final solution, was not the problem that he was proud to show that he finally solved.”
- "Was I only an experiment?" - Colleen Brown
of miles that were put between us could have stopped our love from meeting its flaming curiosity. From miles to hours our love was soon going to explore its strongest desire. Before the alarm on my phone could warn me of his arrival, he appeared on my front doorstep. From friendship to familiarity, my hands against his never felt before body felt like a home without walls and without an overdue rent. For seven days I was in fearless bliss. Using the daylight to explore each others bodies and using the moons rays to open ourselves up and use our new vulnerability to learn the secrets of each others sentimental past life files. I spent seven days in the arms of a once so unreachable stranger. But to him, he spent seven days in the presence of a temporary fix to his curiosity’s high. Just as quickly as he appeared at my doorstep, he disappeared from my arms and my life. From seven days of bliss to several months of silence, our love was no longer wondering, no longer a mystery, no longer separated from distance but from the fulfillment to his own questions. The way my skin might feel against his no longer kept him up at night. He didn’t need to guess anymore because his experiment, his own hypothesis could finally be written in. His conclusion finally complete. He had the answer to his question and it was one that he never intended to skip. But my body, his final solution, was not the problem that he was proud to show that he finally solved.”
- "Was I only an experiment?" - Colleen Brown
"I have followed you
for years but now my legs
are starting to take matters
into their own..."
“I have followed you
for years but now my legs
are starting to take matters
into their own strength
by leading my body
in the direction
of a new path.
My anatomy is tired
of my heart always calling
the shots and is no longer
allowing the emotions
of my mind to take
the route that has been
destined for someone else.”
- "Individual fate," - Colleen Brown
for years but now my legs
are starting to take matters
into their own strength
by leading my body
in the direction
of a new path.
My anatomy is tired
of my heart always calling
the shots and is no longer
allowing the emotions
of my mind to take
the route that has been
destined for someone else.”
- "Individual fate," - Colleen Brown
I still love you,
still think about you,
and I still hold on
to the memories of
when love was
on...
I still love you,
still think about you,
and I still hold on
to the memories of
when love was
on our side. But
just because you
haven’t left my mind,
my heart, and
my skin, does not
mean that I want
you back.
This morning felt different,
I feel different. I am not
who I...
This morning felt different,
I feel different. I am not
who I was during the
nighttime.
This morning felt different, I feel different. I am not who I...
This morning felt different,
I feel different. I am not
who I was during the
nighttime.
Our love must not have
been true if it was
so easily broken
by the distance
that split us
into two.
Our love must not have
been true if it was
so easily broken
by the distance
that split us
into two.
October 1, 2014
"Usually it’s easy being alone. I wake up and don’t have anyone to answer to, or have anyone else to..."
“Usually it’s easy being alone. I wake up and don’t have anyone to answer to, or have anyone else to worry about. I make myself coffee, start my shower water, get everything ready for work and I don’t have to stress myself out by wondering if someone else is leaving on time. But today felt different, this morning waking up alone felt different. I’m not sure if it was the way the clouds were blocking the sun or the sound of silence that must have crept through my home during the nighttime. But something didn’t feel right, and neither did I. Being alone has never bothered me. Actually until today I’ve always embraced my independence. I can now say that I know the difference, have felt the difference between being alone and being lonely. I spent the night at my friends house the other night and I woke up to her and her boyfriend laughing in bed, half asleep and half naked. I thought to myself “Wow. That must be so lovely but so tiring too. I would rather sleep in.” But I did sleep in this morning, and I somehow could hear the sound of their laughter in my almost empty home. I could hear the sound of their future crushing my bones, and I could see why people search for most of their lives trying to find what they have. I haven’t found that yet. I’ve found temporary happiness in past lovers, but they never could keep me coming back for more. They never could make me miss someone while just being in the other room. I’m afraid. I’m fucking terrified that one day, like today, I’m going to wake up alone and that will be because of my lack of commitment to connect to anyone else other than myself, or with someone for more than a couple of weeks. I woke up today and I felt different. I felt incomplete. I felt anger for myself for not reaching out or for not staying. I woke up today and I felt different, because sometimes waking up alone is not as free and easy as you always thought.”
- "Maybe I should get a smaller bed," - Colleen Brown
- "Maybe I should get a smaller bed," - Colleen Brown
September 30, 2014
there’s alwaystwo sides, two truthsand two endingsto every...
there’s always
two sides, two truths
and two endings
to every story.
there’s alwaystwo sides, two truthsand two endingsto...
there’s always
two sides, two truths
and two endings
to every story.
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