Evan Sanders's Blog, page 55

The 2nd Draft Of My Life

The world needs better men.

Who can you be that will serve the world’s deepest needs?

I sit here mashing at the keys in no way a perfect man. In fact, I believe that if you think you are the perfect man…well, theres one problem with you right there. This blog is not intended to be an instruction manual on how to be a better man, but rather my own journey towards becoming the man that I have always wanted to be. I have had my excuses, my failures, my successes and shortcomings, which have all led me to this point. Sitting in front of you, listening to the patter of my fingers on the keys. I have always loved writing. Even though I will be blogging this, I will still have my Moleskin, the overpriced lined diary which I immediately fell in love with not because of the quality of the book, but rather because of one statement. “The legendary notebook of Hemingway.” Anyone who has ever seen a moleskin would understand. The thought of writing in the same type of notebook as Hemingway or Fitzgerald is enticing…it almost drives you to the bar and nudges you to have three or four and see what you could come up with while intoxicated.

I sit here mashing at the keys, 5 years later, an imperfect man. Yet, I love that about myself. I love my flaws and  intricacies. Without them, I would be far less dynamic. This doesn’t mean I don’t go to work on them every single day, but I do accept them as a part of me. I accept the shadow inside of me, the dark part that howls in the depths of the night. Sitting in front of you, listening to the patter of my fingers on the keys, I realize however that I am a changed man. While imperfect, the changes that have occurred in my life throughout the years are too many to list in this single post. I wasn’t aware that I would reach this place – the place of needing to make a decision – but I’ve realize over the past few days that the last 5 years of my life was a gigantic 1st draft for what is to come. This idea is almost intoxicating to me. And yet, I’ve fallen in love with it. 

But I digress. This blog is my 30 day attempt to break all the bad habits I have ever had. Each day, I will go through one thing that I believe that is crucial to my development as a man, and hopefully along the way, you will get something out of it too. I have always wanted to write down the things that matter to me most. Trust me, I’ve been through hell. I can show you vouchers. But there is something very calming about being able to look back on the times when you thought you weren’t going to make it out alive and realize that you did. When I was going through the worst of it, someone once told me “God only gives you as much as you can handle.” This one phrase kept me fighting for the duration no matter how tough it was…because I knew, that this was my test, my challenge, and I had to get through it.

My writing has become as fundamental to me as the blood that runs through my veins. Without it, I feel off balance, lost, and to be completely honest…something feels like it’s missing. The days where I don’t come to write when I know I have something to say feel like I have held something back. This feeling has a emptiness to it that effects me deeply. In light of this, and patterns that I have fallen into over the past couple of months, I am coming back to the table with a new vision for this story I am about to write. My second draft. There are some deep changes to be made. I’ve kept this quote in mind throughout the years and it has never left my side…”God only gives you as much as you can handle.” This one phrase kept me fighting for the duration no matter how tough it was…because I knew, that this was my test, my challenge, and I had to get through it.”

I was asked a very interesting question a few months ago. “Evan, what do you stand for as a person?” To be honest, I stared blankly back at them, not because I was confused by the question, but because I really had no idea. “What the hell do I stand for?” I thought to myself. So I did the one thing that I have been doing since 2nd grade…I made a brainstorming cloud. Trust, loyalty, determination, perseverance…you know, words that sound good on a resume or entries in the thesaurus. Overcoming setbacks…staring down fear…no, no, no, no…..And it came down to me looking back on a few of my favorite quotes of all time. The first is from Rocky Balboa. Yeah, I know, Rocky right? Despite the lisp and the hard to get past lingo, he is quite an impressive director/writer/ Heres the first thing I live by…and if this doesn’t tug at your heart strings a little bit, well, we will work on that in a later post.

Throughout the years I’ve come to understand that it was the grueling times spent in the ditches and shadows that taught me some of the most fundamental lessons I would ever learn. Most of the time, there were never really any words that defined those lessons. As hard as I tried to put them into words they continued to escape me. What was left however was this feeling in my body – a body sense. I knew that something deep down had fundamentally shifted and that there were going to be resulting tectonic movements in my life. That feeling has never failed me. As a writer, my life is surrounded by words. Yet…there are so many things that defy those words themselves. My greatest tools can often render themselves obsolete in the face of what I am experiencing. 

So what do I stand for? Well, this is more of what do I want to stand for from now on. After thinking about it long and hard, I finally found it. Never Quitting. This stands for everything. Never quitting on: relationships, tests, myself, classes, workouts, books, working on myself, friends, promises…the list goes on. For me, this is a very measurable aspect of my life. I can tell whether I quit on something or not, whether I gave up or kept going. There have been events in my life where I have given up and quit, and even thinking about them now I get nauseous. But now, knowing what I stand for and it being at the heart of my character, I will try my best to never stray from that value. Challenge yourself to never quit on anything during that day.  Find what you stand for and let it drive your life.

My “why” goes beyond a few words. My why…the reason why I continue working and moving forward no matter what bubbled up exactly when it needed to. I come to the table every single day because I want to stand as a living representation of the possibilities of dreams. I want to give others permission to dream as big as they can and to chase those dreams like a crazy man chasing happiness. It goes beyond never quitting. It goes beyond passion. It goes beyond love. Whatever “it” is, it runs deep, connecting with a current that has existed for all time. 

“You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, ‘I lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along.’ You must do the thing you think you cannot do.” – Eleanor Roosevelt

For years, this quote has applied and will continue. The advice is right on, and today, I’m at a place where I must really stop to look fear in the face and be able to take on the next thing that comes along. I have done it in the past and there’s no reason why I can’t do it now. What is coming exactly? I have an idea…but there’s much left to be discovered. There’s an entire adventure out there waiting for me. 

Welcome to the second draft of my life. 

Evan

It’s time to free yourself from your past, get present, and start building the life of your dreams. Build yourself a brand new story. Take action now and email me: aykmecoaching@gmail.com

You’re 1 Decision Away From Changing Your Entire Life

1 decision.

That’s all it’s going to take. One decision could change your entire life. Who could you be if you really took a stand for your greatness? Who could you be if you decided that you wanted to be more than a man or a woman, but you wanted to represent an idea? You could be anything if you were willing to pay the price.

What is that price?

Long hours. Pain. Fatigue. Sea of doubt, worry, anxiety, fear…a rush of every negative emotion that you could ever think of. You will have to suffer pain and at times deep loneliness on this path. It’s been said by those who have traveled it time and time again that these are just realities when you are creating something out of yourself that didn’t exist before. These are realities that you must go through when you are becoming more than just a person…you are becoming the living embodiment of an idea.

But what are the payoffs.

You give people permission to live. To dream. To wander out into the forest and explore unknown lands. You inspire them. You motivate them. You breathe fire into their soul when they are lost. You can help them see the stars when the darkness of life seems like too much to handle. You can carry then when they aren’t strong enough to make footsteps of their own. You will be their rock…the one thing in their life, for as long as life will have it, that will never fall away or crumble under the pressure of what the world brings.

You will suffer.

And you will breathe life into yourself and into others.

This is what defines the path. Your self sacrifice is what saves those around you, and in turn, yourself. You have to see it from a different angle. We have all gone through the phase of doing things for ourselves because we want to achieve them…but there’s a different type of power, of motivation, of energy that is born when you begin to start doing things with your life that will give others the permission to dream as large as they can and to have the courage to go after those dreams. You are not just backed by your own will, but by the eyes and hearts of those who are following you.

In the end, you realize that power is only given by the people. They are the source of your rise and your fall. We can do much by ourselves, but the selfishly lived life is the least fulfilled life of all.

We must take the leap and live for the greatness of others. We must pay the price. We must sacrifice. We must…because we can. If we have that ability the call must be answered.

There’s no more time to not do these things despite how hard they can be at times.

There’s no more time to fall out of sync for lame reasons or excuses.

There’s no more time to not take that stand for others.

We must change.

We must go through the growing pains.

We must grow despite what confronts us.

We must.

Because we can.

– Evan Sanders

Emergence of the “Why”

I lost my “why” somewhere along the line.

I lost it without even realizing it. Then I kept going on and on…but something was missing. There was passion. There was work ethic. There was drive. But the questions about what i was doing it for all started to pop up. They didn’t do that before. They didn’t come to the surface because, well, before…I knew exactly what my why was.

I’ve realized over the past couple of days that the losing of my “why” caused me to lose that complete focus. It stopped me from having that laser edge that I need in order to accomplish some of the hardest tasks that are in front of me right now in my life.

I have more in the tank. I am capable of much more than is showing at this moment…and the breakthrough came when I realized that after all of this change, all of this transformation…there existed the empty space that something once filled up in such a grand way.

My why.

As time has gone on with this project, it’s become less and less about me and more and more about what I can give to other people and the world. I am answering a calling and with that calling I need to reinvent my intention.

So, as it sits in me right now, it goes a little something like this.

Why do I do all of this?

Because I want to stand as a representation of an idea…that whatever your dream may be, whatever your story once was or is right now, it’s possible. It’s possible to have it all and to be a good person and to give to the world fully. It’s all possible.

I want to stand for others dreams.

I want to stand for possibility.

I’ve found my why again…and it’s about something much bigger than me.

To me, deep inside…it gets me going.

So…go

Evan Sanders

Fearless Loving

Fearlessly love. When you fearlessly love others, you don’t worry about losing them. I know that everything will end one day, which helps me stay open, but it also allows me to express things, say things, and do things that many might think are “risky.” What’s made me a better man than who I once was? I’m not afraid to take a stand for you being great when you can’t see it. I’m not afraid to say something to you – out of love – that you might not want to hear…but you know you need to hear it. I’m not afraid to lose you…will I miss you? Yes. Will I think about you? Yes. Will I reminisce. Yes. But there’s no fear there. There’s no fear.

It’s time to free yourself from your past, get present, and start building the life of your dreams. Build yourself a brand new story. Take action now and email me: aykmecoaching@gmail.com

Energy Shouldn’t Be Ignored

When you really start to believe in your own magic, you belong everywhere. You are good enough. You matter. The world becomes your playground.

It’s time to free yourself from your past, get present, and start building the life of your dreams. Build yourself a brand new story. Take action now and email me: aykmecoaching@gmail.com

Feels

When you really start to believe in your own magic, you belong everywhere. You are good enough. You matter. The world becomes your playground.  Ready to make a serious change in your life? Email me: aykmecoaching@gmail.com

It’s Time To Commit

I don’t know what to tell you but this…

If you’re going to make a big change, you have to take massive action. You have to do the things you’ve never done before to start living the life you’ve never had. This year is not going to be different than any other year unless you start getting the tools, taking the steps, and doing new things. Time will slip by and you will find yourself repeating all of the same actions and falling into the same divots you always have.

You have to do something new. Read the books. Get the training. Invest in yourself. Invest in your life. Invest in who you are and who you want to be.

If you want things to be different, you must make different choices. You have to take the daily steps to create something new. The quantum leap of personal development is a huge lie. You can’t do it. No one can. No one changes their entire life overnight.

So take a new step.

Take a leap of faith.

It’s time to free yourself from your past, get present, and start building the life of your dreams. Build yourself a brand new story. Take action now and email me: aykmecoaching@gmail.com

If You Hesitate

Be a priority, not an option. Treat others the same. Don’t lose a diamond because you decided to chase glitter…

It’s time to free yourself from your past, get present, and start building the life of your dreams. Build yourself a brand new story. Take action now and email me: aykmecoaching@gmail.com

Start A New Journey

5 years ago I sat down on my bed with my face in my hands wondering what the hell I was going to do with my life.

I had just lost my greatest love (baseball) due to injury, my life was an absolute mess, I was plagued by a low self-esteem that prevented me from believing I had any real potential, I lacked inner vision and was completely consumed by my past.

Truly, I was in a dark place.

I was definitely a complete mess.

In fact, I describe that time period of my life as an emotional tornado. Sounds great right?!

I pretty much destroyed everything in my path and most of the good relationships had.

Then, something clicked.

I was being called to write…

Back then, I didn’t know that starting to write my thoughts, feelings, and events going on in my life would yield a lifetime commitment to personal development, the launching of a life coaching practice, a community of over 100,000 people and thousands of blog posts. Back then, I was just trying to gasp for air and felt that writing would be the way to do that.

So long story short…

I wrote Two Wolves as a tribute to the greatest lessons I have learned over the past 5 years of writing.

Honestly though…it’s far more than that. It’s a deep dive into discovering how both light and dark can exist at the same time. The book seeks to explore questions of happiness, sadness, success, failure, and many other topics, including ones that most are too uncomfortable to talk about.

This story, a journey about becoming who you are and taking control of your path, has been an amazing one to write and reflect on. And with over 1,300 downloads…those who have read it have something to say about it as well…

“I could actually feel so many of the emotions in the book. It gave me the encouragement I need to finish the race!”

“The struggle between the dark and light is something every person has to deal with. Thank you for taking the time to write something that I believe will change my perspective of my life.”

“This book came out at the right time for me. One of the darkest times of life . Thank you for such an inspiring book.”

“Truly exceptional! I’ve been battling with my two wolves and this has been superbly inspiring. I know it will be a long journey, and currently my spokes are a bit broken, but as a new father, this certainly goes a long way in helping me become a better man.”

“Every dream could die off due to lost hope, but reading this was the most encouragement I had in a long time.”

“It is truly life-changing, paradigm shifting and life transforming book. Even if you hadn’t been following the project from the very beginning, you can still figure out what the writer is talking about.”

I hope you will join me on this journey through the pages of “Two Wolves” because I am sure there is something in there that will resonate with you, change your perspective, or just help you see a situation in a different light.

That’s how great change and transformation comes about. That’s how miracles happen.

Start your own journey today – check out the book now! http://btrman.me/1D8MBMQ

An Iron Will & Clear Vision

A vision.

You’ve probably heard of the need to develop one of these before, but I’m here to tell you exactly why you need it. Sure, developing a compelling vision for your life and what you want to do with yourself is incredibly important on many different levels, but there’s a completely different reason why a vision is absolutely crucial for your success.

A vision is there to keep you going when everything begins to fall apart.

Your journey is going to be riddled with challenge after challenge and you will get knocked down. That’s just part of the game. You will be tested and you will crack under pressure. Your life at times is going to get incredibly messy and things will look blacker than black. Like I said before, this is part of being out on the field of life chasing after your dreams. This is to be expected. The “pit” is the part where you really get to understand just how bad you want something.

But without a reason to continue on, you won’t.

You must have something that is going to get you up in the morning when you don’t want to get out of bed. You have to have something that will make you continue working when you feel like you’ve exhausted every last ounce of your energy. This vision must be grand enough to inspire you and achievable enough to keep your working your butt off.

Other people are not going to believe in what you are doing 100% because they cannot see what you have in your mind. Your vision is going to be too much for many so it’s imperitive that you protect it with all of your will. You must protect it from the critic inside trying to ruin it for you as well. Develop a vision for yourself that will stretch you past your current boundaries and is focused on giving your greatest gifts to the world.

If you can do this and come to the table every single day willing to make strides towards accomplishing that goal, there’s no telling what you may do in this world.

What’s your biggest goal? What’s your grand vision? What are your toughest challenges right now? I will block my time out for you on a call and create a life-changing coaching experience for you. All you have to do is email me at aykmecoaching@gmail.com and we will set up a time to chat. No catch. No obligations. I’m here to help you change your life. So don’t wait another minute and email me as soon as possible.

Evan Sanders is the author of The Words Of Encouragement, a website dedicated to bringing the best quotes, motivational content on the web, and blogs all to one place. Feeling ready to take the journey of your life? Dive into these life is too short quotes for some more inspiration.