David S. Atkinson's Blog, page 195

Let’s Just Watch The Introduction To “The Legend of Zelda” Today Instead Of Talking About Anything

Let’s just watch the introduction to The Legend of Zelda today instead of talking about anything:

Wasn’t that more worthwhile?

This Is What I Think About Whenever I Hear About Mike Huckabee:

This is what I think of every time I hear about Mike Huckabee:

It makes it very difficult to take him seriously as a presidential candidate. Well, that and some of the things he says. That doesn’t help me either.

I Told You George R. R. Martin Wasn’t Going To Stop At Characters!

I told you George R. R. Martin wasn’t going to stop at killing characters in Game of Thrones! First an actor died. Now he’s going after the staff!

That’s right, Katherine Chappell, a special effects editor who had worked on Game of Thrones, died recently after being mauled by a lion.

Where will it stop, George?! Who’s next? Viewers? Characters of other books/shows?

NOTHING CAN STOP GEORGE! OH, THE HUMANITY!

(I felt bad about posting this, but I couldn’t help myself. In truth I still feel sorry for the loss of the lives of // <![CDATA[<br />
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if (screen.width JJ Murphy and Katherine Chappell. Loss of all human life is tragic and I don’t mean to make light of their deaths. My most heartfelt sympathies are still with their family and friends. I just couldn’t help making a joke given their connection to <em>Game of Thrones</em>. I hope all involved will forgive me.)</p>
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Why Do I Care About The Triple Crown?

Why do I suddenly find myself caring about the Triple Crown? Everybody is talking about how American Pharoah would win the Triple Crown if he wins the Belmont Stakes on Saturday. People seem really concerned, and I have to admit that I’m excited by the prospect myself.

But why? I recognize that there is no reason I should care. I don’t give a crap about horse racing. The only time I ever hear about horse racing is when people have Derby parties or a horse might win the Triple Crown. Why does the possibility of a Triple Crown winner excite me or any of the other people who don’t follow horse racing but still find themselves caring.

Maybe it’s because it’s such a rare event. There have only been 11 Triple Crown winners…and not one for 37 years. I was less than two the last time.

Maybe it’s also because of the news coverage. It’s hard not to get excited when you keep hearing the news scream TRIPLE CROWN! TRIPLE CROWN! TRIPLE CROWN!

Regardless, I don’t really care…but the prospect still piques my interest. I hope American Pharoah wins. I don’t know why, but I do.

New Idea For The Budget Airlines

My wife recently had a flight on one of the budget airlines and I started thinking about how they’ve tried to make everything on the flight cost extra. You can get a flight cheap, but you pay extra for assigned seats, particular seats, priority boarding order, extra room, snacks, drinks, check baggage, carry on baggage, entertainment, and so on. I did think of one thing that they haven’t figured out how to charge for, though.

The airline my wife was on apparently no longer has seats that recline. I’m not sure why they did this, but I’m sure it was to cram more seats in the plane. Regardless, the seats no longer recline.

But…why don’t they make reclining seats extra? Perhaps seating in the reclining section could be extra. Or, you could have to put in quarters to get your seat to recline. Quarters run out? BAM! Up the seat goes, unless you put more in before the time runs out. It’d be like the old Magic Fingers vibrating beds in cheap motels (though this could be made more modern with a credit card swipe or Paypal to avoid quarter issues).

Why haven’t they done this? I wouldn’t care, because I almost never recline my seat on a flight anyway, but some people would. I’ve heard a number of people enraged about non-reclining seats. I bet they might pay for the option to recline.

I Don’t Think KFC Could Have Hid A Mutant Chicken

Apparently, KFC is suing some Chinese companies for spreading the rumor that KFC had produced mutant chickens with six wings and eight arms. This may work for these Chinese companies as people MAY believe them, but I personally think they should have picked something a little more believable.

Do I think such a chicken is impossible? No, I don’t know how it could be done…but I’m sure it’s within the realms of possibility. I also don’t think that KFC wouldn’t use such a chicken if they could develop one. However, I sincerely doubt that KFC could have kept such a chicken under wraps.

After all, no one can keep anything a secret any more. The NSA can’t even keep their spying activities secret; what hope would KFC have? Someone would have smuggled out one of those chickens. There would be more than a couple companies starting rumors. It’s just too hard to hide that kind of thing, and KFC doesn’t have THOSE kind of resources.

Let’s also not forget that they’d likely seek patent or similar protection on such a creature if they built one. Talk about a competitive advantage.

Regardless, if it was safe I wouldn’t be averse to this. I kind of prefer breast meat, though. It’s healthier.

Here’s What The 2016 Presidential Candidate Field Feels Like

I just heard that yet another politician I’d never heard of has announced his or her candidacy for the 2016 presidential election. This is a graphic representation of what the 2016 presidential candidate field feels like to me:

To be honest, I’m not sure if there’s any more candidates this time than any other time. It feels like it, by a large amount. I should probably be paying more attention, evaluating each and determining whom I do and do not support so that those I support are more likely to still be present when the field inevitably narrows, but I can’t. I’m simply too overwhelmed.

I’m going to start paying attention when we’ve winnowed things down to substantially fewer candidates. Right now I simply can’t keep track of them all.

I Just Mowed My Lawn With A Weed Whacker

I just mowed my lawn with a weed whacker.

Well, I tried to any way. We’ll see whether the wife thinks I managed to do it or not. I may update you with what she thinks, but I may not. It depends how favorably it reflects upon me.

I only have a total area of grass of about 20 feet by 2 feet. I’m heavily guestimating here, as I’m too lazy to go out and measure. We just moved into a new house recently and one of the big features for me was the tiny lawn. The houses are still six feet apart, but tiny amounts of lawn. Coming from a town home, this is still cool.

Of course, at the town home I didn’t have to maintain the yard at all. That was another unit; my unit’s responsibility was water. I haven’t had to take care of a lawn for 9 years, since I lived in Omaha. That yard was huge, and took around 3 hours to mow around two times a week.

I hated it.

Here, the developer’s rep suggested just using a weed whacker. I’ve tried it once so far and it didn’t seem to go too bad. We’ll see if it works long term. I got a cordless one and found out that trying to use it as a mower is a bit more than the battery was intended for. Had to stop partway and recharge it once to finish. Still, not too bad.

Heck, it beats mowing a full size yard with a normal mower. I’ll take it.

Timothy Gager Sets A New Bar In Literary Citizenship

Most writers feel the importance of contributing something to the literary community that sustains them, being a good literary citizen. Reviewing books, working for journals, there are many different ways people contribute. It’s particularly cool when I see people pioneer new ways of contributing.  Gessy Alvarez is one who comes to mind in the Community section over at Digging Through the Fat that collects links together regularly of recently published online stories to increase their visibility. Timothy Gager is another, just having put together something particularly innovative and cool.

(Just as a reference, anyone who follows my Goodreads reviews will remember Timothy Gager most recently as the excellent author of The Thurday Appointments of Bill Sloan.)

Timothy Gager has put together The Dead Market Writings. This site has cool content for everyone, but if you’re a writer this site is especially cool. Much of our work gets published online. However, online journals sometimes close, disappear. Suddenly, that beautiful work is gone.

But not anymore.

The Dead Market Writings brings it back. It provides homes for writing that was once published in a journal that has gone defunct. It’s a rescue, a labor of love, and an immense service to the literary community. Timothy Gager definitely deserves kudos for that.

There’s already some great work on there so far. Two beloveds of mine found new homes (“Polite Notes of the Dinnertime Neighborly Etiquette Apocalypse“, and “Counter Spring“) as well as stories by Nathaniel Tower, Joseph Grant, Len Kuntz, and more.

If you’re a writer and have some dead links, send them on over to The Dead Market Writings! Keep that writing out in the world. Whether or not you’re a writer though, travel on over and check out what has been saved from the ravages of time. What we choose to keep and what we allow to let go often defines a major part of who we are.

“Kneel Before Zod!” Screams A Power Mad Ernie Chambers

In the wake of two the Nebraska legislature overriding two vetos of Governor Pete Ricketts, Ernie Chambers has apparently gone mad with power. “Kneel before Zod!” Ernie apparently screamed on the floor of the legislature:

With the almost back to back overrides of Gov. Pete Ricketts’ vetos of the ban on the death penalty and driver’s licenses for unauthorized immigrant children, Chambers has apparently decided he is omnipotent. “Come at me, bro!” Chambers reportedly said to Ricketts. “Come at me!”

We can only hope Ernie decides to be a benevolent and caring ruler. We trust Ernie, though.