Dave Barry's Blog, page 83

AND IN SPORTS

Women get in porta-potty brawl at Morgan Wallen concert: ���Hoping for swirly���

(Thanks to Annette)

SOMETIMES WE FEEL VERY OLD

���Hot bedding is excellent for people who are able to detach emotionally and sleep next to another person in a completely respectful and non-strings-attached manner,��� Monique Jeremiah, 36, an entrepreneur from Queensland, Australia, told CatersNews.

(Thanks to Rick Day)

HOW TO IMPRESS A BOUNCER

Teen accused of biting Necto employee���s testicles after being denied entrance

(Thanks to Dave Vander Ark)

DEATH?

What Would an Ancient Egyptian Corpse Have Smelled Like?

(Thanks to Jim Kenaston)

GUESS THE STATE

As the dispute escalated, Reed allegedly threw a lollipop at Johndrow, striking him the chest. Luckily, the lollipop lick ���did not cause bodily harm,��� according to an arrest affidavit.

(Thanks to Barry Nester, Al Barkafski and Maryann)

JUST AN ASPIRIN FOR US, THANKS

Doctors can now prescribe patients a trip to the Canadian Museum of Nature

(Thanks to B&C)

BELLE FOURCHE, SOUTH DAKOTA:

City of Excitement

(Thanks to Ralph)

NOBEL PRIZE ALERT

���Beer goggles��� study finds alcohol does not make people seem better looking

(Thanks to Chris, who says "alcohol was involved.")

OTHER THAN THAT EVERYTHING'S FINE

Giant asteroids over Earth pose 'catastrophic threat that could end civilisation'

(Thanks to John Lobert, who says "Hold off on that car payment.")

'IT ACTUALLY SHOWS A HOMELESS MAN MOVING HIS BELONGINGS TO ANOTHER CAMP'

True crime fans claim to catch 'killer disposing of body' on Google Street View

Nice work, True Crime Fans.

(Thanks to John Lobert)