Dave Barry's Blog, page 56

WE'RE GONNA NEED BIGGER HANDCUFFS

Massive elephant busted raiding Thai convenience store, making off with rice crackers, eggs: ���Surprised and alarmed���

(Thanks to many people)

HOLD OFF ON THAT MORTGAGE PAYMENT

Japan���s ���Baba Vanga��� warns of 2025 event that could lead to devastation ��� and now people are canceling their summer trips

(Thanks to John Lobert, who says "Sounds legit to me.")

AT LEAST IT WASN'T SOMEONE ELSE'S COFFIN

88-year-old woman woke up inside her own coffin after mistakenly being declared dead

(Thanks to Ron Wylie)

'MAY'

Personal Flying Cars May Be Luxury's New Status Symbol

(Thanks to Barry Nester)

FRANCE ON HIGH ALERT

Marauding moths from Macedonia wreaking havoc across British conker trees

(Thanks to Ralph)

THE JOB: FLORIDA DRIVING INSTRUCTOR

Man driving 132 mph told trooper he was late for a job interview

(Thanks to Nelson from Michigan)

WE *WANT* TO BELIEVE THIS IS A JOKE

Pet Yeast Craze Gaining Traction in China

(Thanks to Ralph)

THE NEWS FROM FLORIDA

It is not good.

WELL WHAT WAS SHE SUPPOSED TO DO?

Texas woman, 76, flies into violent rage after hearing bagpipes at local park

(Thanks to Annette)

INCLUDING LAWRENCE WELK'S CHILDHOOD HOME!

North Dakota promises flush toilets at historic sites

(Thanks to The Perts)