Tom Clempson's Blog, page 16
May 30, 2011
Last Week's Tweets
Round up of last weeks tweets now on the blog http://t.co/L2Nudc6 #
2 days left to enter The Big Blog Giveaway for signed Jack Samsonite book! Just comment on any recent post to enter http://t.co/6haK8CR #
Inspire a character in a future book (again) – new blog post. Plus new reviews (leave a comment to enter giveaway) http://bit.ly/mhqP9u #
"It seems I am brave enough to come to school and face the prospect of getting totally messed-up by a strange… http://fb.me/Gt1jjkdE #
Happy Birthday @Keris! 40? Why pick 40? Strange age to choose! Next year I think I'll try 17. Have a goodun! #
Have you read @FictionThirst being interviewed on this blog? http://bit.ly/jmh6w8 we likes him @realjohngreen @CarolineLawrenc @johncleaver #
My book is already in some shops! And someone ( @sisterspooky ) has already bought it!!! (*toe, thumb & earlobe explode all at same time!*) #
If anyone spots my book in a shop PLEASE can you take a pic for me? I'm a my-book-sighting-virgin and it's making my nipples itch! #
10 mins left to enter signed 'One Seriously Messed-Up Week…' giveaway (with BOOKMARK!!) ! Comment on blog to enter http://bitly.com/hksBGl #
"David Cameron! Winston Churchill! Margaret Thatcher!
My two favourite girls ever were making a Jack sandwich and… http://fb.me/zPD8UEUj #
1 week until publication, which means this is the last giveaway! RT to win a signed copy of 'One Seriously Messed-Up Week…' #JackSamsonite #
Just been to see @WondrousReads in her bookshop (she's very nice!) and I saw my book on a real shelf in a real shop! http://t.co/8ICMUUk #
Had 1hr put aside to work on book. Spent the entire time on twitter! Damn. Damn. Damn. #
Forgot to say – I saw a guy get hit by a car today! (Or a car get hit by a guy) ran across 3 lanes of traffic, flipped right over, then… #
…he got up and ran away! I mean he PROPERLY got tossed through the air, like a rag doll! #
Last week of my signed giveaways of 'Jack Samsonite' book. RT to enter the competition! #
"Of course there was one thing about Rich Hiccupping Bitch that I had not taken into full consideration – she was a bitch." #JackSamsonite #
#FF Amazing tweeters @WondrousReads @Keris @midnightreads @hannahfeelip @hannahmcmoon @emma_bookangel @mattlibrarian @FictionThirst… #
… @sisterspooky @PewterWolf13 @Serendipity_Viv @LizUK @AtomBooks @lovereadingx @TheBookbag @imaaronvincent @stephanellaw @cat_clarke #
(sorry. Last one!) #FF @iHeartRevenants @CethanLeahy @minnielovesit @GaspItsChami @worduplancs @wsdeansgate @Scorchingrevs #
Is it evil that, now I'm a parent, long weekends don't have the appeal they used to? #
"You dropped your flooglewotsit in Benny McTittypant's codswallop" #JackSamsonite #fb #
"You dropped your flooglewotsit in Benny McTittypant's codswallop" #JackSamsonite #
5 days until #JackSamsonite official pub date (though it's already online and in some shops!) RT to enter my signed giveaway + extras #
Always read something that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it. – P. J. O'Rourke #
RT TO WIN! Just a few more days to the end of my final #JackSamsonite giveaway. RT to enter for a signed copy + extras! #
"I would like to be able to tell you that she was checking out my legendary fake package, but I fear that what she… http://fb.me/VAUVEIqx #
Related posts:Last Week's Tweets
Last Week's Tweets
May 25, 2011
And The Winner Is…
The Big Blog Giveaway has now closed and a winner has been randomly selected. Thank you to everyone who entered! If it is not your name written below I am sorry (I secretly hoped it would be you!) but do not despair because there is still ONE more week of giveaways to celebrate the last week before the official publication of the book.
This final week of giveaways will be done on Twitter (so if you're not a tweeter you better start now!). I'd like to do something a bit more imaginative and less needy than just asking you to Retweet my special #JackSamsonite tweets. But unfortunatley my imagination has run dry for the day. So unless anyone else has a better idea, I guess we'll just stick with that!
Also, as this is the last giveaway, I'll do my best to think of something extra to throw in along with the signed book and bookmark – probably just something I'll find laying about the house – a discarded tissue, or a cornflake, maybe even some fluff that has broken free from between my toes. (The excitement builds!)
Okay, so the winner is… I always feel really bad for those that didn't win. I'd like to give everyone a prize, but I suppose I have to leave someone to buy the book. I feel even worse that the internet randomiser picked another Aussie! (not because I don't like them, I love them. They just cost a lot more in postage. And this is the 2nd one in a row!). But she does seem super lovely, and her blog is full of gorgeous inspiration and niceness, so I'm extremely happy to say that this weeks winner is…
'Secret Admirer'!
(She's not actually MY secret admirer, it's just her screen name, which is a bit disappointing).
Congratulations Secret Admirer! I'll get your winnings to you ASAP!
Related posts:The Big Blog Giveaway!
Signed Book Giveaway
Check Out The Bookmarks!
May 24, 2011
Is It Just Me…? Part 2
This week, in my quest for help with research and inspiration for new characters in my books, I'm going in completely the opposite direction to my last 'Is It Just Me…?' post, and, instead of asking about rage, I am now researching the horrible affliction of 'stupid, annoying, over-the-top happiness'.
Is It Just Me… or does anyone else suffer from inexplicable bouts of the above illness? Sometimes, usually when no one else is around, I find myself acting stranger than normal. A mild attack can merely consist of singing loudly in the shower, but this can rapidly progress to Muppet-voiced conversations with the dirty crockery that I am washing, or can even result in symptoms as cronic as fashioning my hair in a fancy way, whilst rapping in the style of a soprano (the high-pitched lady-singers, not the gravel-voiced TV gangsters) and dancing like a rhythmically challenged hippo with springs on its feet.
The strange thing is, this illness is in fact an important slice of my personality. It's part of who I am, and I actually like it! Yet, weirdly, I would never show this side of myself to ANYONE outside of my immediate family (and sometimes not even them) and I would especially not admit to it on a Blog post. I'm not sure if it's a confidence thing, if it's just because this part of me only comes out to play when I'm alone, or if it's because I'm aware this is about as annoying as a human being can possibly get, but it is definitely a behind-closed-doors thing.
So, the queston is – does anyone else have a part of their personality that they enjoy, something that you feel is a vital part of who you are, but never let anyone see? A stupid,fun, secret you?
Or is it justy me?
No related posts.
May 23, 2011
Last Week's Tweets
Woohoo! Thanks for being my 200th follower @PMJtweets ! (and @berfrois for being my 201st!) #
Thanks for being 202, 203, 204 & 205 @damonky @eveslegwear @lee_jordan and… Oh it seems @MarkJWBoyd just unfollowed me! Who be my new 205? #
Round- up of last weeks tweets (edited) now at the blog http://t.co/L58OPg6 #
Check out my shelves on Goodreads: http://goodreads.com/twitter_u…..r_id=96950 #
On page 2 of 18 of I Want My Potty, by Tony Ross http://goodreads.com/user_status/show/6255100 #
"Here's a handy tip for anyone trapped in a lighting box and needing to make their head bleed – CD cases really… http://fb.me/ZjI6iLLA #
Still 2(ish) days left to enter the 'One Seriously Messed-Up Week…' giveaway on my Facebook page (just click the… http://fb.me/Vylv9R4I #
I got up two hours ago. Why do I feel like a fraud if I tweet 'Good morning' now? It's still morning! #
Good morning! #
"Privacy is important when doing a wee. If someone is stood next to me at the urinals then I cannot piss, I don't… http://fb.me/STu0z7uc #
Last day of my Facebook signed giveaway of 'One Seriously Messed-Up Week…' Just 'Like' this page to enter. #
Head along to @midnightreads blog to read the Playlist for 'One Seriously Messed-Up Week…' http://t.co/ajCFV7G #
Why is Twitter not showing me my Mentions?! #Ithoughtnobodylovedme #
Onion bagels. What are they all about? #
Only a few minutes left to enter my facebook signed giveaway of 'One Seriously Messed-Up Week…'! 'Like' the page to enter. #
"Then in walks Zack, wilfully breaking all the rules of men's-room-etiquette. Not only does he start TALKING to… http://fb.me/13pK2e4XV #
This weeks signed giveaway of 'One Seriously Messed-Up Week…' is now closed! And the winner, (picked at random), is… KATRINA WHITTAKER! #
The fb giveaway is dead. Long live the blog giveaway! Starts now. Ends 1 weeks. And now there's bookmarks too (ooooh!). http://bit.ly/lhUcX8 #
I lost 4lbs in one week with the 'Run, Run, Then Run Some More Until You Think You're Going To Die' plan! #
Not quite as much as I lost with the 'Vom, Squit, Then Vom Some More Until You Almost Implode' plan, two years ago. #
I'm hoping the 'Slob Out and Eat Crap' plan will garner the best results though (fingers crossed!) #
I'm thinking of marketing my own miracle weight-loss program. I'll call it 'Eat Healthy & Excercise More You Idiot!' #
"She spotted the rubbish on the floor, bent down to pick it up and…. GO GO GO! SWARM SWARM! ALL EYES ON THE… http://fb.me/Gx5rvJnw #
Today I spent too much time driving, and now my bottom cheeks hurt (thought you might like to know). #
OK I am now officially excited. Am also beginning to secretly check my local waterstones in case they decided to stock OSMUW early… #
(in the pretence of looking at other books, obviously). #
Free Jack Samsonite bookmarks and a signed book giveaway over at the blog http://www.tomclempson.com #
"Oh dear God. If there's one thing that won't help this situation it would be poking Julie in the hip with my… http://fb.me/Zxvb18d1 #
What's this about the world ending today? Why did no one tell me?! I paid for the car park and everything! I feel like such a fool. #
I can't remember how long the tram takes to get to Manchester, but my connecting train leaves in 30 mins and I'm beginning to STRESS OUT! #
"@emma_bookangel: Thank you for the FF! #
Related posts:Signed Book Giveaway
Last Week's Tweets
Last Week's Tweets
May 22, 2011
The Sequel (The Torture)
I am happy to announce that I am REALLY excited about the publication of 'One Seriously Messed-Up Week…' (11 days to go)! Unfortunately, hand in hand with that excitement, comes an equal amount of excruciating pant-crappings. But not about this book.
I have been warned that writing book two can be tricky, and, to be honest, although it's taking a little extra work than I would have expected, I wouldn't say I'm struggling with the writing. It's the pressure that's freaking the hell out of me! There's a whole list…
Staying true to book 1 without repeating it.
Knowing that someone is actually going to be reading it after I write it.
Knowing that some people are waiting to read it!
Weirdly, one thing that has relieved a MASSIVE pressure, is slowly adding to it – being funded by the Arts Council is nothing short of a blessing, in fact I wouldn't be writing right now without it, but at the same time, being paid to write something, by people who want nothing in return other than to see you succeed, is another thing knawing at my back of my mind.
I don't even know that these pressures are relevant, because, if book one bombs and becomes tomorrows toilet paper, then NO ONE will be reading it, which in itself is another pressure!
So, naturally, I hit Google to read about other's problems, to make me feel better. There's a whole load of great advice out there but even better than that, there' a whole load of people a lot more messed-up than me! If you feel fat, hang out with the morbidly obese. If you feel old, spend the weekend at a retirement home. If you feel like your going slightly insane, read other people's blogs. Awesome.
Related posts:Woof!
Threes and Firsts
May 19, 2011
Check Out The Bookmarks!
My bookmarks are here!
Strangely enough, having bookmarks seems to make my upcoming publication feel more real. (Not sure why, they just do). And since reading Secret Admirer's freakily uncanny comment on my last post, I thought I would share the bookmark beauty with you.
So here they are.
Possibly the stupidest bookmarks a boy could wish for.
If you would like some to deposit in your local library or bookshop, or just a signed one for yourself, just drop me a message (see below), with your address and I'll see what I can do!
tomclempson(I'm not going to put that 'at' symbol here, because I don't want to get bombarded with autobot spam, but this is obviously where you would put that 'at' symbol. Don't write all of this stuff into the email address. That would be silly. And it wouldn't work.)gmail.com
No related posts.
May 18, 2011
The Big Blog Giveaway!
Welcome to another week of giveaways of 'OSMUW', where you have another chance to win a signed copy of my debut novel. We are now at week 3 of giveaways, which means two things:
The giveaway home, for this week, is right here at my blog.
Only 2 weeks to go until publication day!
The excitement is building up and so is the work. But even though I have now seen BOXES filled with my books, it still doesn't quite feel real. For so long my goal in writing was to write something that at least one person would want to read and would enjoy, and, somehow, I've already gotten there. I've signed the contract, read the reviews, seen the finished books, answered the interview questions, seen it available to buy on all the major bookshops websites, but still something in my head has not clicked to allow me to comprehend that I am being published.
My wife is constantly asking me, 'How can you be so calm about this?' and 'Why do you seem so underwhelmed?!' and I think there are two honest answers to those questions:
I'm calm about it all because none of it has actually sunk in. I don't feel any different inside. I'm still just me, writing at every opportunity, dreaming of a better future.
I think there's some kind of self-defensive force-field mechanism that has automatically been deployed around my head. I never expect amazing things to happen to me, and if something seems too good to be true, then it usually is. So, this, to me, obviously counts as AMAZING, but I'm still waiting for the catch. I'm not allowing myself to get too emotionally involved, because I'm too afraid of getting completely crushed if it all goes wrong. (I'm pretty sure I would make a really good case study for some Psychology students).
The only thing is, so far, nothing has gone wrong. It's only getting better. Which is absolutely scaring the crap out of me! I am aware of how insanely negative this sounds and, believe me, I am one of the most optomisitc people you are ever likely to meet! But I just can't help it! I cannot shake that feeling of the higher I climb, the further I have to fall.
So, for now, I am focussing on my original goal – that one person. And each time I read about another one person that has read and enjoyed my book, that's where I get my excitement. That's when I fill up inside, like I'm about to burst with positivity. And I don't suppose any kind of downfall can ever take that away.
So, getting back to the giveaway. It's open for 1 week. To enter just comment on any new post on my blog this week. I'll attempt to make that easier by trying to do one post a day for the rest of the week (but I'm not making any promises). The giveaway closes on Wednesday 25th May and a winner will be drawn at random.
Win yourself a book and maybe you'll be another one person (or maybe you'll be my downfall)!
Related posts:Signed Book Giveaway
Threes and Firsts
May 16, 2011
Last Week's Tweets
If only Morgan Freeman did audiobooks! #
Round-up of last weeks tweets over at the blog http://www.tomclempson.com/?p=295 #
Last day to RT and enter the signed 'One Seriously Mesed-Up Week…' #JackSamsonite giveaway! #
"He has the personality of a ball of snot, the sense of humour of a cave man and I know for a fact he shat his pants last yr" #JackSamsonite #
"Whoever said religion's the cause of 99% of all wars was clearly mistaken Hairstyle is obviously the predominant aggravator" #JackSamsonite #
The #JackSamsonite giveaway is officially closed! And the first ever signed copy of 'One Seriously Messed-Up Week' goes to… @lovereadingx #
Congratulations @lovereadingx You won my #JackSamsonite giveaway! DM your details and I'll get it in the post to you! #
Don't worry, if you didn't win my #JackSamsonite giveaway. Another signed giveaway is starting RIGHT NOW! On Facebook http://on.fb.me/kkHSVW #
The Twitter giveaway of 'One Seriously Messed-Up Week…' is now closed. Which means… The Facebook giveaway has… http://fb.me/12e6Ul5Vl #
Thank you to everyone who RT'd to enter my giveaway! 3 more chances to win before publication day though! Week 2 is the Facebook giveaway #
"Girls are supposed to go for the sensitive type who isn't afraid to cry right? Strange that they always seem to… http://fb.me/z18FjS1j #
I hold an INTERNATIONAL giveaway, and the randomly chosen winner happens to live 10 miles away! Not a northern conspiracy, I swear! #
Slept in! Instead of waking me, my 2yr old taught herself how to use iplayer on my phone & watched cbeebies FOR TWO HOURS! #
For 1 week only, just click 'Like' at the top of this Facebook page to be entered into my signed book giveaway (if… http://fb.me/Fchy2m64 #
So many cool films I'm looking forward to seeing this year! (So many films I'll probably have to wait to watch on DVD) #
"I had gone from being a normal person to a normal person who had the very real threat of having blood gushing… http://fb.me/MB62Upqq #
Prepare yourself for cute! (unless snuggly baby ducks scare you, in which case… Prepare yourself for pure terror!) http://t.co/jk49v0O #
I'm sat here, happily working hard on my laptop, typing away like a very good boy. And the two middle-age scrotes on the table opposite… #
…Won't stop sneering and muttering about how "everyone has to take the Internet everywhere" and how I'm "pathetic. Sad and pathetic."!!! #
And to make matters worse… They're both wearing track suits! #
"The rest of my life ruined by the decision to fart 2 seconds too soon!" #JackSamsonite #
"Free periods mean you go up the field.
Sunshine means you go up the field.
Having someone out to kill you means… http://fb.me/X2Y6txqM #
A month of giveaways! Go check it out at the blog http://t.co/L58OPg6 #
Had a fab morning working on new project with @cupcakes4clara (very exciting!) #
If you haven't already done so, you can enter week 2 of my signed #JackSamsonite giveaways by Liking my Facebook page! http://t.co/NuK0cyr #
You get back to ur car to find some1 parked 1mm away & you now have a crack in your bumper. Do you A: shrug & ignore it B: call insurance… #
… Or C) take an old 'parking penalty' sticker from your glove box, put a comical yet insulting note inside, then stick it to their window? #
Twitter? 'Over capacity'?! do you also run those car parks that let people in when there's no spaces, and the airlines that sell tickets… #
…on flights that are already overbooked? #
"Considering a fight with a Year 8 girl would probably be enough to put me in hospital I expect it would only take… http://fb.me/IGcgzjyw #
Thanks to those who sponsored my 10k run today! I finished it without even dying! (well, maybe a little bit). #
Derek Jacobi. #
Orange juice – compare and contrast. #
"Choosing the correct clothing for the lower region is as important to a teenage boy as choosing the right body… http://fb.me/120PbWQRx #
Ouch. I ache. #
Related posts:Signed Book Giveaway
Last Week's Tweets
Last Week's Tweets
May 11, 2011
Signed Book Giveaway
I have, just minutes ago, given away my first ever signed copy of 'One Seriously Messed-Up Week…' (actually, I havent signed it yet – need to quickly learn how not to have 8yr old handwriting) and with 3 weeks remaining before publication day, that means 3 more signed book to give away!
The first of those three chances is now up on my Facebook page.
The next giveaway will be on my blog.
The final giveaway will be on Twitter.
(more info on these at the time)
Good luck!
No related posts.
May 9, 2011
Last Week's Tweets
Did my 1st proper training run for the Great Manchester 10k Run last night. Did 3k. Knee seized up after 2k. In a word… Reallynotgood! #
Only 4 weeks til One Seriously Messed-Up Week is published! To celebrate I'm giving away 1 signed copy each week! RT to enter #JackSamsonite #
"The ones who don't show it all off have a lot more appeal than the ones who paint it orange and flaunt it for the builders" #JackSamsonite #
Goodreads just recommended @iHeartRevenants Die For Me, to me! I guess I better order it! #
Only 4 weeks until One Seriously Messed-Up Week is published! To celebrate I'm giving away 1 signed copy each… http://fb.me/Xfx10b0j #
Hello and thanks to all my new followers! #
Important! Whenever you burn 236 calories on a 20 min jog, you must always restore your energy by eating 500 calories of choc after! Right? #
Important! I must remember I am a very manly man and must try to stop discussing things like calories & chocolate in public. Ooh! Glee's on! #
To enter my Twitter giveaway of 'One Seriously Messed-Up Week…' (signed, sorry), simply RT this tweet! #JackSamsonite #
May the 5th be with you! Oh… Hang on… Frick! I missed it! Next year. It's gonna be so clever you won't believe it! Only 364 days to go! #
And whilst we're counting down, only 30 days until One Seriously Messed-Up Week… Don't forget to RT to enter the giveaway! #JackSamsonite #
"My mouth dried up, my pits did the opposite. She has this thing called 'hotness' and I appear to be severely allergic." #JackSamsonite #
Note to old man in M&S men's room: if you don't lock the door, & someone walks in on you, mid poo, saying 'occupied' is too little too late! #
Got so engrossed with writing that I forgot about the parking limit! Got back to my car nearly 2 hrs after the ticket expired. 1st ever fine #
Still waiting for Orange to remove Safeguard from my mobile broadband. According to them the @AtomBooks blog isn't suitable for under 18s?! #
"Eleanor is destined to be with me and I'm not going to let a stupid little thing like fate get in the way of that" #JackSamsonite #
To enter my signed giveaway of 'One Seriously Messed-Up Week…' simply RT this tweet! #JackSamsonite #
Some brand new (for me) & interesting #FF s @lalalen @MilesWestwood @MackandSaund @minnielovesit @CethanLeahy @Avas_Writer @OzAlleyCat #
Fantastic! Thank you @mattlibrarian , that's very nice to hear! Glad you're enjoying it. @atombooks #
Hello, thank you and welcome to my new followers. Plus a BIG thanks to everyone entering my giveaway (which closes Wed 11th). Keep it up! #
Thought I'd avoid the pricey drinks in Costa, so bought an innocent smoothie… £2.30! £2.30!!!!!!!! #
Done writing for the day (2000 words). Now must drive home, do a 2 mile jog, shower, eat, collect girl child from nursery & all in 1 hour! #
On my way to see Hugh Laurie in concert! @cupcakes4clara has threatened to faint. #
For the first time in YEARS I am the only one in the house that isn't tired! #
"Dear God, please could you fix it for me to have the ground do that opening up & swallowing thing I've heard so much about" #JackSamsonite #
3 days left to RT a #JackSamsonite tweet to enter my signed 'One Seriously Messed-Up Week…' giveaway. #
Went for a 20 min jog that turned into a 30 min jog when I got lost HALF A MILE FROM MY HOUSE! #
"If I, Futureboy, cannot control my own destiny, then I am just going to have to mess around with other people's" #JackSamsonite #
No related posts.
