O.M. Grey's Blog, page 41

Steps for Creating Intimacy

I've just watched a powerful five-part video series on healing relationships. One of the things covered were the Steps to Create Intimacy.

1. Specify what, when, and how.

What is actually needed from both parties? When is the best time to work on this, give/receive what you both need, and how do you want them to be given? People are either Visual (a look in one's eyes, their smile), Auditory (whispers in your ear or words of love and support), Kinesthetic (physical contact), or need to receive love via gestures like gifts and surprises.

2. Be honest about your needs and desires. Clarify them. Get you partner to repeat back what they heard so you can be sure you're being understood.

3. Decide who goes first. So often a couple is waiting for the other to make the first move. Someone needs to. Be a man and step up. Take the chance, then really be there for your woman. You will feel more masculine if you do. Take charge.

4. Commit to making your partner feel your love. Seriously. Commit. She will test you again and again, but you must remain present and truly with her, guys.

5. Express & Experiment. You may need to try all the different styles with your partner to find out which one they respond best to.

Watch this series here.

Renew your intimacy every day.

Filed under: Uncategorized Tagged: honesty, intimacy, love, o.m. grey, olivia grey, open, open marriage, polyamory, postaweek2011, relationship advice, relationships, sex

Seashells in Normandy

My trip thus far has been one of deep introspection. It was supposed to be a writing retreat, but as is usually the case in life, the universe had other plans for me. Seems that life needed to teach me a lesson again, and this time I had to deal with it relatively alone. Certainly dear friends, some old and others new, help me talk through my endless questions, worries, doubts, and what-ifs, but my primary source of support is on the other side of the planet. Add to that the limited cell service in the mountains of California, where my husband is, and the sporadic Internet where I am in Europe…and yes, I feel quite alone.

Two days before I left for my trip I thought I was embarking on an adventure of romance, both on paper and in life. I was blissfully in love. I was to write a new steampunk romance and hopefully meet my lover. But said lover ended our affair on the eve of my journey. Nice timing.

So now, I can't write.

I can't create.

I can only think and think and cry and think.

I wander from place to place, talking with anyone who will listen. Trying to figure out what went wrong. What I could've done differently. Rationalizing away the pain for another day by holding onto a hope of reconciliation. Then vacillating to the polar opposite and the tears come. Back and forth.

Today I walked on the beach of Normandy. A cool wind chilling my flesh as I stood just at the seaside, looking down at the broken seashells, each one representing a life lost. As each wave washed over my bare feet, I thought of him just on the other side of the channel. Then with each ebb of the water, pushed him from my thoughts.

Over and over.

To and fro.

Ebb and flow.

Back and forth.

This torment consumes me.

And yet I try to write.

And yet I try to read.

And yet I try to forget.

And yet, I cannot.

And yet I go through the motions of the day, filling it with too many cigarettes. Looking for a way to push the inevitable pain away for another few minutes, another day. I hold onto hope because I'm terrified of the chasm that will follow the acceptance that it's truly over.

I hold onto hope so I don't feel like a fool, but perhaps by holding onto hope I only prove that I am a fool.

I search for solace in others. And find none.

I search for peace within. And find none.

I search for the quiet that the darkness brings. But the light burns my eyes.

I search for the numbness of sleep. But there are far too many sleepless hours.

The beauty of France surrounds me. Glorious fireworks over the beach of Cabourg, like golden flakes lighting the night sky. Sounds of a marching band filling the streets in a celebration of life. Twelfth century cathedrals with their now faceless gargoyles looming overhead. Rolling green hills made more vibrant by the rain and grey skies. A line of people paining a seaside view, although looking at the same scene, each of their creations are unique. Narrow streets flanked with my beloved Tudor architecture, as if walking through a Disney Fairytale world. Ruins of rich history, like where Joan D'arc was martyred. Caen. Cabourg. Honfleur. Rouen. Scantily clad families braving the chill winds to enjoy a sunny afternoon on the beach. Children laughing while they ride a tiny carousel from the Nineteeth Century. Cobblestone streets filled with bustling life. Endless cafés where I sit with a friend to share a coffee and a smoke, talking about life, love, and art.

And I would trade it all just to see him smile at me.

The succulent French food delights my tongue. Rich, fresh pain au chocolat with a hot cup of coffee in the mornings. Fresh baguettes and smelly cheese. Rhubarb yogurt. Crème brûlée. Fresh vegetables from my host's garden, cooked up just to honor my vegetarian diet. Mozzarella tomate. A Nutella crêpe. Marguerite pizza at a Brasserie that you're expected to eat in one sitting…and you do. More bread. And, of course, more cheese. Camembert. Chevre. Livarot. Clinking wine glasses and wishing each other Bon Appetit. Enjoying a glass of Kir Mûr with a friend as the sun sets and the air grows cooler.

And I would trade it all for one more kiss.

And so. I continue on. Filling the days with talk and smoke and never-ending thoughts. Pushing away the tears. Hoping for a miracle.

And so. I continue to put the pain off for another day, knowing it is inevitable. Like death.

It will come, but not today.

Today I hope.

Today I dream.

Today I live.

Filed under: Lost in the Aether Tagged: author, broken heart, healing, heartbroken, honesty, love, non-monogamy, o.m. grey, olivia grey, open, open marriage, polyamory, postaweek2011, relationships, romance, shattered, travel

Ethical Responsibility (Podcast)

Episode 9: Ethical Responsibility.

If we know about a deception that could destroy a marriage or relationship, do we have an ethical responsibility to tell the wronged party? Would you want to be told? What if you found out your best friend knew and said nothing? In this podcast, I explore the ethical questions surrounding infidelity.

Ethical Responsibility (Podcast)

Original Blog Post

Filed under: Podcasts Tagged: author, broken heart, healing, honesty, infidelity, love, misogyny, non-monogamy, o.m. grey, olivia grey, open, open marriage, podcast, polyamory, postaweek2011, relationships, romance, sex, steampunk

Steampunk Fantasy

Tight corset, fluffy bustle,

Victorian demure.

Red hair and lips to match,

Mysterious for sure.

A woman of their dreams;

Lady with great allure.

Until the wig comes off

And the corset's undone,

Beneath the skirts,

Beneath the blush,

They see my true face,

And that image they shun.

They see my healing scars.

They see my fragile heart.

They see intensity,

And it all falls apart.

When they truly see me,

They're no longer so keen.

I become too plain.

I become too real.

And then I am unseen

By them.

A Steampunk Fantasy.

Exotic and aloof,

But when I'm really me:

Their silence, all the proof

I need.

Filed under: Lost in the Aether Tagged: author, broken heart, bustles, corsets, heartbroken, love, non-monogamy, o.m. grey, olivia grey, poetry, postaweek2011, relationships, romance, sex, shattered, steampunk, victorian

Choices After Indiscretion

[image error]You cheated. It's done. It's now too late to make another decision because you cannot erase the past. What are your choices?

First, let's define infidelity. As Dr. Phil says, "If you wouldn't do it with your spouse standing there, it's cheating." (Again, really not a fan, but he does have some good advice on relationships.)

This includes, but is not limited to, online flirtations, propositions, cybersex or sexting, kissing, oral sex, and, obviously, intercourse. Unless you and your significant other (SO) have already defined sexual contact as genital to genital contact or penetration, assume that any of the above and more would be considered an infidelity.

Let me preface the rest of the post by saying that I'm not judging here. I will use some judgmental language, like betrayal, liar, etc., but that is because it is how your spouse will feel and it is the reality of what you've done. I'm not saying you're a horrible person for your weakness or for your past choices, I'm just trying to give it to you straight.

So you cheated. It happens far too often, and unfortunately now your choices are much more limited than they were before. You do have choices, but none of them are good ones. It's a complicated situation to which there is no easy way out.

1. Come clean. Tell your spouse/SO about the indiscretion and deal with their reaction. This will undoubtedly be anger and feelings of betrayal, because you did betray their trust and their love by your actions. They might very well end the relationship, but often they won't because they don't want to be alone either. They don't want to lose their family either. Whatever their reaction, it is now up to you to regain their trust, and it will likely take years. Be prepared to deal with not only your self-loathing but your spouse's self-loathing, too, as they'll likely hate themselves for staying with you after what you have done. They will hate themselves for not having the strength to leave.

If they're willing to keep trying to build a life together, ask them what you can do to make it better. Then do whatever they say. Start by being true to your word and telling them ev.ery.thing, no matter how small something might seem. Tell them. You will have to deal with their anger for a long time, and you will need to do whatever it takes to rebuild that lost trust, if it can ever be completely rebuilt. If you truly want to save your relationship, you will have to work very hard for likely years before they fully trust you again. You can build this trust faster by being open and honest. I guess it goes without saying that it's best to build intimacy before you step out.

2. Don't tell and keep it to yourself. Your spouse has no idea that you cheated, and you're not about to tell them. This might work, and they might never find out, but they usually do. Because once there is one indiscretion, there are usually more. Still, you can try it, but if they find out on their own, it will be far worse than you telling them about it and begging for forgiveness. If you decide to keep it inside, you will be living a lie, and that in itself can be soul-destroying. Many people live lies, and they seem to survive. I can't really speak to what that's like, but it must feel like a part of you has died. You will never truly been seen or accepted by your most beloved because they never get to see all of you. They'll never know the real you.

People justify keeping things to themselves because they think that by confessing their indiscretion, it's protecting their spouse from being hurt. They're already hurt. They just don't know it yet, at least not on a conscious level, but I guarantee they know something isn't right. If you have kids, they likely feel it, too. Children are very intuitive. They haven't yet learned how to lie to themselves.

Still, hiding away is an option, but if you choose this option, please move forward by building intimacy with them now. For, as I mentioned, the first lie is the hardest. It gets easier after that, especially if you believe you got away with it.

You certainly can continue to have affairs, getting what you need from one or more extramarital partners, but that's a very dangerous game of Russian Roulette. If and when it becomes known, the betrayal will be much deeper than if you had just come clean at the beginning because now you not only have the indiscretion(s), you now have the months or years (or decades) of deception on top of it. As I've said before, the deception is far more damaging than the sex with someone else. The deception, when your spouse realizes they've been forced into a living a lie and given no choice in the matter, is shattering. They might never recover from such a profound slight.

3. Don't tell at first, and work towards an open relationship. This is almost as risky as the above choice, if not more so, because you are attempting to build trust on top of a lie. And this will only work if it was only a one-time thing and not ongoing with multiple extramarital partners. Follow the advice from previous posts and podcasts about healing your relationship. With some luck and a lot of work, you will get to the point in your relationship that you are so close and understanding that you might be able to come clean with much less fallout than at first. This is a real gamble, though.

I actually asked my husband about this scenario last night, and we couldn't come up with a good solution. We are very close, and if he were to tell me he cheated on me before we opened our marriage six years ago, I'm not sure how I would react. It could go either way, really. I would either just say that the past is the past, and where we are now is what's important because where we are now is beautiful. Or…I would wonder what other lies he has told. I would question everything, and it would be very difficult to get through it.

For me, there is no greater betrayal than deception, so it would likely be the latter. That said, I wouldn't leave because of what we've built since. But there would be some difficult weeks thereafter. But it would be weeks and not years.

He, on the other hand, would probably take it in stride if it had been my indiscretion. So that's why it's a gamble. It really depends on the individual and their personality and the level of intimacy and trust in the relationship.

Bottom line, whichever of the above three options you choose, building trust and intimacy is a very essential part of moving forward, that is, if you want to save the relationship and respect your life partner.

4. End the relationship. If you cheated because you are unhappy in your relationship and you don't see a real future together, then do both of you a favor and end the relationship. You both deserve better than living a lie.

I often like to think of the future me when it comes to decisions like these. Do I want to wake up in 20 or 30 years and realize I wasted my life with someone, knowing that I might've found someone better for me? Knowing that I kept him from finding someone better for him? I haven't ended many relationships, because there is nothing more important than relationships with others in my life. They are what makes this life worth living, really. Mutual love and respect. Although I have ended a few, I did so with as much love and understanding as possible. I was once engaged, years ago, and I could see our future would be one of painful mediocrity. I loved him dearly, still do, but I knew we would not be happy together. We're still friends nearly 20 years later, and he has a beautiful family, and so do I. We are both happier because we ended our relationship, yet we are still special to one another.

I have watched friends live horrible lives with a partner, fighting daily. Toying with infidelity all from the safety of their primary relationship. Ultimately, it ends with a lot of pain and regret, but so much of that can be avoided if we can find the courage to be honest with ourselves and with those who mean the most to us.

You can, of course, continue having affairs, secretly, perhaps even unconsciously hoping that your spouse finds out. Perhaps you see this as the easy way out, basically because it won't be your decision to leave. But, of course, you have already left the primary relationship, you just didn't tell your spouse that you left. I have also watched friends end a marriage this way, and it's a world of pain and not at all respectful of anyone else involved. Still, it is a way to end it.

Last month I wrote a post on how to end a romantic relationship with love and respect. Even if the romantic part is severed, you do not have to lose that person forever, especially if you share children. You will always be connected by your children, so it's even more imperative to transition out of a romantic relationship into a lovingly friendly one. You're stuck with each other for life, and if you want to do what's best for your children, it's to always treat their mother/father with the respect they deserve.

So these are the options as I see them. Can you think of another option one has after an indiscretion? I'd be happy to discuss others.

Filed under: Romance & Relationships Tagged: author, broken heart, grief, healing, heartbroken, honesty, infidelity, love, non-monogamy, o.m. grey, olivia grey, open, open marriage, polyamory, postaweek2011, relationship advice, relationships, romance, sex, shattered

Paris Dans Mon Cœur

As I sit on the train about to leave my beloved city of Paris, I realize that I need to learn to say goodbye. It is the most difficult word for me to say and truly mean. When joy enters my life, in whatever form, I have a hard time letting go. For I'm old enough to know that joy is too rare, too fleeting, so I try to hold onto it as long as I can. But more often than not it's futile.

My short time in Paris was so very healing, and now I must say goodbye. Pour maintenant, au moins.

Yesterday afternoon I cried. I had to say goodbye to three friends I hadn't seen in 4 years. We do stay relatively in touch via social networks, but it is sporadic at best, as our lives are so very separate. Still, they remain special to me, and it was lovely to discover that I remain special to them, too.

One of the men was once a lover, very short lived. And for the first time in five years we spoke of it. In fact, we got along so well that we talked and laughed and drank and shared for eight wonderful hours. We spoke of writing and life and love and sex and relationships. It was one of the best evenings of my life. Truly lovely, and I didn't want it to end. I wanted to hold onto that feeling of acceptance and joy. But it did end, as it always must.

Still, I hold that evening in my heart and the things I learned about my former lover, as well as the things I learned about myself. I also hold the night we shared five years ago in my heart, and now in a more positive, loving way than before. He gave me a great gift by talking with me and opening up, expressing how he felt then and how he feels now. Yes, a great gift indeed.

So, as the train barrels towards Caen to meet another dear friend who I haven't seen in four years, I leave Paris behind for now. But Paris stays with me wherever I go. From the friends I've made to the fantasies created.

With every step around that magnificent city my current beloved was with me. Although he is in another country and our relationship is in such a state of flux I don't know how it will turn out, for now he remains deep in my heart. As I traveled around the city, I remembered how he texted me from Paris telling me how he only had eyes for me. I remembered how we dreamed of what could be. I remembered how our growing desire felt as if would consume us, and we just didn't care. I remembered the hopeful love I felt for him then, and it poignantly mixed with the deep, yet uncertain, love I feel for him now.

When I walked in the rain on the grey streets of Paris, he was with me. Although alone, I kissed him beneath the Eiffel Tower. I bought a chocolate/vanilla twist ice cream, and remembered. I walked hand in hand with him along The Seine. I perused comics and old books with him, learning more about the man I love with each new beautiful moment. He was there for every splash in every puddle, reminding me of another rainy night and the kiss that changed my life. When I rode the Metro, I remembered how he moved his hand to secretly touch mine as we held onto the subway pole, steadying ourselves against the movement of the train and the whirlwind starting in our hearts. I would look at every face on the streets of Paris and on the Metro, hoping one would be his, although I knew it was impossible. I still looked. I still hoped that by some miracle I would see his face. His smile. His eyes.

But I remained alone.

Mais, il est avec moi, òu donc je vais…

Il est dans mon cœur. Toujours.

Toujours.

Toujours.

Filed under: Lost in the Aether Tagged: author, broken heart, Eiffel tower, france, heartbroken, love, o.m. grey, olivia grey, open, Paris, polyamory, relationship advice, relationships, seine, steampunk, travel

Rewarding Misogyny (Podcast)

Episode 8: Rewarding Misogyny.

We live in a highly misogynistic culture, and we might be perpetuating misogyny by just keeping quiet when we hear misogynistic comments. Or, worse, we find humor in it, as people have done with Charlie Sheen. Let's learn to recognize misogyny in social situations as well as in personal relationships…and stamp it out.

Rewarding Misogyny (Podcast)

Original Blog Post

Filed under: Podcasts Tagged: author, broken heart, charlie sheen, healing, honesty, infidelity, love, misogyny, non-monogamy, o.m. grey, olivia grey, open, open marriage, podcast, polyamory, postaweek2011, relationships, romance, sex, steampunk

Tumultuous Travels

After all the planning and hopes and dreams of all that a European working vacation might bring, one is rarely prepared for what reality has in store. I arrived in London on Thursday, August 7th. Exhausted. After twenty hours of straight travel and with four more to go, my stress was rapidly reaching it's limit. Only an hour in customs wasn't terrible, and although I had had very little sleep or food in the previous 48 hours due to some highly upsetting news the day before I left, I was anxious to get to my hotel in Brighton. My plan had been to take the Tube to Victoria Station, walk down to the O2 shop, and get a UK sim card for my iPhone. Which, I did. The shop was a bit further than I had anticipated, but that might've just been due to my level of exhaustion and having to carry my luggage on my back there and back. I did pack rather light, a carry on shoulder bag, backpack, and purse, but they all did become quite heavy rather quickly.

The O2 sim card was a bargain. Only £10 for a UK number that included data, texts, and Internet. One problem: turns out my iPhone was locked with AT&T, so it wouldn't recognize the UK sim. Okay. No worries. The lady at O2 said there was a shop back in Victoria Station called the Phone Doctor where I could get it unlocked for about £50. It would be worth it, as I needed my phone. Scratch that. I *live* on my phone. Without my phone, I was cut off from everything. Husband. Friends. Business. Email. Twitter. Support network. Everything. Plus, I was supposed to text a special friend my UK number for an important phone call later that day.

Stress mounting. Exhaustion weighing heavy. I trudged back down Victoria Street to the station, which, by the way, is fricken huge. My shoulders and back were already screaming at me for carrying so much weight up and down Victoria Street. There were dozens of shops in Victoria Station, and I couldn't bear to think about walking the entire thing, in both terminals, to find this one shop. So I asked someone who worked there. I followed their directions, but nothing. So I asked another and another, and each time, each person sent me in the wrong direction. I guess just because they like to fuck with tourists. I was near tears at this point. Finally, someone told me where I could really find this Phone Doctor, and after nearly escaping a very frightening homeless man who tried to corner me, I found it. I walked in the shop ready to pay my £50 and be connected once again. I set down my heavy bags and handed the guy my iPhone.

Sorry. He said. Can't unlock this phone.

What? I said. But the sign says you can unlock any phone.

Yes. Any phone but this phone. Only AT&T can unlock this phone.

Thank you I said, my voice began to crack. I took my phone, piled my bags back onto my weary body, and went back to the station to see through my tears that I had missed my train to Brighton. Of course.

Fortunately, the next train wasn't too far off, and although it was more expensive than the last, I just wanted to sit down. Upon arrival in Brighton, I took a bus to the hotel, walked another 1/2 mile to my hotel, and checked in. Still. No phone. Although the hotel said it had Internet in the room, it didn't. I had to squat in the stairwell to get any service. I immediately went out to another O2 shop to see what I could do about a phone, stopping at every "we can unlock any phone" service between my seaside hotel and Churchill Square. None of them could unlock my phone.

Neither of the two O2 shops in Churchill Square would take my sim card back, even though the lady in the London shop said any O2 shop would. I tried to get a cheap phone, but both shops were sold out of every phone under £50, which is about $80. So, I went back to my tiny hotel room in defeated tears and never felt so alone in my life, cut off from everyone.

I've still not had any food at this point, as I was far too upset to eat. After 24+ hours of travel, the stress of the phone debacle, no food, heartbreak, exhaustion, jet lag, and being cut off from the world as I knew it, I was teetering on a panic attack, and I really needed a friend. But the one person I knew in town didn't have time for me that evening, so I was truly alone. I won't go into much more detail on my trip to Brighton for personal reasons, but that day turned out to be one of the worse days of my life.

I finally ended up getting a cheap phone the next day, and, on top of everything else, discovered I was getting sick. At first I thought it was a symptom of the anxiety and heartbreak, but it turned out to be a virus. Lucky me.

I was able to touch base with my husband briefly, for he was on the road somewhere in Colorado, but it helped some. For a few minutes, but there I was again in my tiny hotel room, alone. No where to go and no one to see, increasingly ill, and the only loo I shared with 9 other rooms. Out of sheer desperation, I called a kind man I had met via Twitter, who at that point was little more than a friendly acquaintance, just to have someone to talk to, and he graciously took pity on me & my brokenhearted predicament and invited me to London to stay with him and his family. Even though I had to let go of my prepaid hotel and lose $350, I took him up on his generous offer. Losing the money was better than being alone, feeling as if I hadn't a friend in the world for the next four days.

So I'll always be grateful to @MarcUpdates, now a dear friend & my brother in London, for taking care of me in my hour of need. He was a real knoght in shing armor for this damsel in distress. I truly don't know how I would've survived that painful weekend without him and his family.

Thank you, Marc, for being there when I needed someone.

You're a true friend.

If you care for me or my work, please shoot @MarcUpdates a quick thank you for his kindness. Because of him, there will be another book at the end of the summer.

Thanks to the kindness of one person, I feel much less lonely now.

More (happier, I hope!) travel posts to follow.

-_Q

Filed under: Lost in the Aether Tagged: author, broken heart, europe, friend, heartbroken, o.m. grey, olivia grey, postaweek2011, travel

Fear of Abandonment Can Lead to Infidelity

[image error]In past posts and podcasts, I've talked about how sharing your fears with your spouse or significant other (SO) can help build intimacy between you. Today I want to talk about the other side of this issue: what can happen if you don't share your fears, especially the innate fear of abandonment.

None of us wants to be alone. But so often the fear of being alone makes us feel very alone. We hide things we should be sharing with our SO for fear or hurting them or fear of their anger. We're afraid that if we tell them whatever it is we're feeling that they'll be so hurt or angry or offended that they'll leave us.

The opposite is the case, actually. The harder it is to tell your SO something, the more important it is to tell them.

Open communication is the only thing that will ensure a healthy relationship in the long run. Once communication stops for whatever reason, although it's usually boils down to fear of abandonment or losing one's family, you increase the risk of losing them. It feels much like a Catch 22, but it's not. You simply must open up to your beloved or the consequences can be dire for your relationship, and ultimately your sense of self.

Perhaps the scariest thing to tell your spouse is that you find someone else attractive or perhaps it's something as innocuous as having a dream about another wo/man. Another terrifying thing to share is that you feel unfulfilled or that your needs aren't being met. Whether those needs are sexual in nature or emotional. Perhaps you just don't feel seen or loved by your spouse any longer. These types of things are essential to discuss openly with your SO.

By holding such fears inside, they fester and they grow, making them increasingly difficult to share with your beloved. Too often, people find solace in the arms of new lover because this new lover is easier to talk to. But of course they're easier to talk to! You have so much less to lose with a relative stranger. You find it easy to bear your soul to a new person because if they leave, then your family is still intact. You might lose a new love, but the security of one's established relationship is untouched. Or, perhaps it's more accurate to say that your primary partner is unaware that your relationship has been threatened and/or betrayed. For now.

When one is unable to share their deepest fears and dreams with their spouse, it opens the door to someone outside the marriage, for we all need to express ourselves from time to time. Even the most private person needs to vent and share and feel that they've been heard, seen. But by opening that door, it can never again be completely closed. Once one lie, one deception, has been embraced, it is that much easier to lie or deceive again. Then you are looking at someone in the mirror you may not like very much. Suddenly you realize that you are the very person you did not want to become, and it all started with an intense fear of abandonment.

Trust your spouse. After all, you chose to build a life together with this person, perhaps even build a family with them. So share your life. That's what it's all about in the end.

Remember, the harder it is to tell your beloved whatever it is you're keeping from them, the more important it is to tell them that very thing. Find the courage to start bridging that gap today, or it will just become a chasm that is impossible to cross.

Filed under: Uncategorized Tagged: author, broken heart, grief, heartbroken, honesty, infidelity, love, non-monogamy, o.m. grey, olivia grey, open, open marriage, polyamory, postaweek2011, relationship advice, relationships, romance, sex, shattered

Mini Hiatus

I'm in Europe. In fact, at the time of this post, I'm somewhere in London getting over a rather bad illness picked up in the airport or on the train, but I'm well on the road to recovery. I'll be heading to France on Thursday, returning to the UK on August 3rd.

My Steampunk Spotlights will be on a brief hiatus until well into September. So on Tuesdays, if anything, will be posts about my travels, random poetry, or other miscellany. All other posts have been written before my trip and scheduled for Wednesdays and Fridays through the end of August at least, so you'll still get your weekly relationship article and podcast. Just the rest might be a bit sporadic.

Please still do comment, etc., as I'll continue responding to each comment while I'm away.

Hope you have a lovely summer.

Filed under: Lost in the Aether Tagged: author, book, england, europe, france, o.m. grey, olivia grey, polyamory, postaweek2011, steampunk, travel, uk