Jon Acuff's Blog, page 58

Christian Music Supergroups Poised to Take the World By Storm

(It’s guest post Friday. Today’s is one from a Stuff Christians Like legend, Curtis Honeycutt. If you want to write one too, submit it here.)

As music trends come and go, everyone’s waiting for the next big thing—the next wave of artists to take the world of music into uncharted territory. Well, believe it or not, here are some Christian music supergroups poised to be the biggest things in music since the British Invasion:

I Can Only Imagine Dragons

This is actually a series of college campus lectures given by the guys from MercyMe where they tackle the peculiar passages in the Bible some have linked to dinosaurs. Was Jonah actually swallowed up by Nessie? You’ll have to buy a ticket and find out!

Switchfootloose

This straight-to-VHS documentary about a popular band from California who wants to express themselves through dance has gotten pretty mixed reviews from the online community. The best scene is when the group’s manager refuses to let them perform an interpretive dance number during their concert, so they run off into the forest and do some serious angry dancing. In the end, it’s a beautiful letdown.

The David Crowder*Experiment (DC*E)

In this new TLC reality show, The Rend Collective Experiment takes a My Fair Lady­style bet from a rival band that they can’t pass off David Crowder as their long lost banjo player from Northern Ireland. The group tries and tries to shake Crowder’s heavy Texas accent, and it almost works, that is, until he unpredictably busts out a keytar solo in the middle of “Build Your Kingdom Here”. Hey, I’d buy that album.

The World Wide Webb

Derek Webb takes his music around the world in this supergroup that combines everyone he’s ever worked with, including Caedmon’s Call, Jars of Clay and some obscure, yet cool bands from NoiseTrade. The tour also includes people he’s always wanted to work with, like Questlove. Years later, Al Gore will take credit for the idea of these guys getting together to form the World Wide Webb.

Relient K Cups

Sometimes you really only want a taste of Relient K, but don’t want to have to make an entire album full of their music. Now, you can have a single serving size Relient K song with Relient K Cups. Simply open up the cup and one Relient K song will play. After the song is over, simply toss the empty cup in the trash and start your day.

The Goo Goo Ga Ga Güngör Tour

What do you get when you combine hit rock group, the headline-catching artist who brought us hits like “Poker Face” and the band who’s bringing umlaut back? You get the Goo Goo Ga Ga Güngör Tour, coming to a city near you. This is the biggest and strangest thing to entertain kids’ ears since Yo Gabba Gabba. Make sure to stay until the very end, because you won’t want to miss the encore, where all three acts come out and sing their hits while wearing outfits made entirely out of fruit leather.

Audio News

In probably the best idea out of all these, Audio Adrenaline combines forces with the Newsboys to form this truly supergroup that includes two thirds of dc Talk. Their debut album is phenomenal, but there is one major problem: after downloading Audio News’ songs, iTunes gets confused by the band’s name and categorizes their tracks as podcasts, so no one gets around to listening to them. Oh well. That would have been an awesome band.

What bands did I leave out? What groups would you like to see take the world by storm?

(For more great ideas from Curtis, follow him on Twitter.)

The post Christian Music Supergroups Poised to Take the World By Storm appeared first on Stuff Christians Like.

Why we’re addicted to easy prayers.

Adventures aren’t easy.

Errands are easy.

The problem is that’s the life most of us pray for.

We want journeys where the destination is guaranteed. We want adventures where the danger is controllable. We want voyages where we can still see the land at all times.

And so we end up with errand lives.

Driving to a job where you don’t give it your all is an errand.

Phoning in a marriage you thought would be all fireworks is an errand.

Praying big, comfy, safe prayers is an errand.

Is life always an adventure? Of course not. There are ups and downs and more plains than mountains.

But is following a God an errand? Will faith always be easy, comfortable or painless? Will the way always be clear and simple.

Nope. I’m afraid not.

Errands are easy.

Adventures never are.

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So many photos, so many laughs!

Everyday, awesome folks like you email or tweet me hilarious images that are perfect for Stuff Christians Like.

Such as this:

This is an image from the recent Disney movie, “Frozen.” Upon seeing this, my 8 year old daughter said, “But they were real sisters, not sisters in Christ.” I told her she was wrong and reminded her of the scene in the movie where the girl made a church out of ice and converted the snowman character to five points calvinism using a frozen tulip.

I digress.

Today, I’m inviting you to join my shared Stuff Christians Like board on Pinterest. Let’s collect and document the many, many hilarious things we find online that might fit on Stuff Christians Like. My one caveat is that let’s keep it funny. No images of lighthouses with storms raging and Philippians 4:13 written across them in comic sans.

Here are two ways to join:

1. Click here and comment on the Frozen post in the Pinterest board.

2. Follow Tammy Helfrich today on Pinterest. She’s helping run it.

That’s it. No need to comment on this post, instead head to Pinterest. Let’s build the biggest, funniest Christian image board on the planet. (Which will take approximately 42 images. It’s a low bar.)

p.s. If you’re a guy and think Pinterest is just for women, you are correct. It is. If you could give me a two year head start to build up a huge platform before you join that would be great.

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I would buy this t-shirt.

Years ago, I wrote about my desire for a t-shirt that said, “I direct deposit my tithe.” Basically I realized that everyone in my aisle, my row radius if you will, was judging the way I hot potatoed the offering basket because I don’t give at church. I give online.

Thankfully, comic genius Adam Ford of the site Adam4d.com created this visually representation of my dream.

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Using fake money for your real God.

Someone named “Tico and Tina” posted this on Instagram and asked if it were doing more harm than good.

I am willing to accept it as good if you can show me an example of where Christ did something similar.

When he met the woman at the well, did he hand her a bucket, watch her try to drink only to find it empty and then say, “Disappointed? You won’t be disappointed in the living water?” Did he not engage with her at all and instead just leave some fake drachmas by the well?

And when he healed someone, did he ever just pretend heal them and then say whatever was Aramaic for “Pysch! Disappointed your leg is still crippled? God’s love will never disappoint you.”

I don’t remember any of that ever happening but I’m no scholar. I’m just a handsome blogger, but maybe there’s more to life than just being really, really, really ridiculously good looking?

Let’s quit creating tracts that try to sucker punch people into Jesus.

Deal?

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Still there is hope.

(A few years ago, I discovered that it’s more fun to help other people change their lives than it is to obsess about your own. Instead of putting these new ideas on Stuff Christians Like and breaking the format of the site, I started a new site called Acuff.me. If you ever want to be more awesome, read that site. As part of my new hope to help people, I’ve started several communities online. I’ve heard thousands of stories in the years but this one really caught my eye about the importance of encouragement. It’s not a traditional guest post, but sometimes you have to break with tradition. Here’s a new story from Shanna, I hope it encourages you like it encouraged me.)

Back in late 1999, after the birth of my eldest daughter and several deaths in my family, I hit rock bottom emotionally.  Since I was normally such a peppy, upbeat person, doctors saw this new low and diagnosed me with bipolar disorder in a very short 15-minute appointment.  I was given a stack of prescriptions and sent on my not-so-merry way.  For three years I fully believed in this diagnosis, even though the medications never helped and were changed and increased frequently.  I was told the medications were safe through the pregnancy and birth of my son, and again when I learned I was pregnant with my youngest daughter shortly after becoming a single mother.

Within a few short years I’d been through a messy divorce, been abandoned by my family and friends, and became an over-medicated zombie, barely able to get out of bed and certainly not coherent enough to care for my home and children. Unfortunately, my children were removed and placed into state care on December 12, 2002 until I could prove that I was mentally and emotionally capable of being a parent.  I’d lost everything, including my children and home, and had almost completely given up.  I was a single, pregnant mother with no car and no job and everything to prove if I ever wanted to get my life back. I was completely alone.

My only option was a local emergency shelter.  Fortunately, Emergency Shelter of the Fox Valley is one with many more programs and services than most have available.  They have classes on accountable tenancy, resume workshops, and interviewing skills.  Case managers work with clients to match them with local programs that help get them back on their feet.  More than that, though, the people who work at the shelter are warm, and have compassionate hearts and open minds.

Nearly everyone, even social workers and doctors, told me that fighting was useless.  It was better for me to give up. My new obstetrician told me there would be no way my baby would survive the pregnancy due to an entire first trimester bombarded by prescription drugs, each of which had the power to inflict deformities and cognitive issues in an unborn child.  I was told I should look into special needs adoption or have an abortion, for the sake of the child who would have no real quality of life.  Those voices became louder when I was placed on bedrest after going into preterm labor at 5 months pregnant. I wanted to give up.

However, the positive voices of the staff at the shelter told me a different story. The voices of the shelter staff urged me on and told me to fight. They told me not to give up. They helped me draft legal documents and taught me to be an advocate for my own health and to hold tight to my faith.  When I had every right and reason to give up, those few, small voices helped me to keep moving.  I fought for a full evaluation and was re-diagnosed with only situational depression (stemming for postpartum depression and mourning the loss of the family members who had passed) with stress-related anxiety.  I’d never had a need for the high doses of psychotropic drugs I’d been prescribed.

Grace was born three weeks early during my stay at the shelter. She was healthy and strong, despite everything the doctors had feared.  God  had seen her through the impossible, and He was doing the same for me.  My newborn daughter and I came back to the shelter from the hospital to a room filled with a new crib, a layette, and about a dozen gifts from shelter staff.  I sat and cried at this generosity from people I had only met three months before.  Additionally, the shelter had a fledgling program in the works to bring awareness to the plight of homeless children, and they asked to name it after my daughter. Project Saving Grace was born, and they used her image in the marketing.

I’d had a job from early on in the pregnancy, and they’d held the position for me through the last few months of pregnancy and Gracie’s first month.  Armed with a newfound sense of self-respect and dignity, I went back to work and found a place to live by the time Grace was two months old.  My other children were returned soon afterward.  I’m not going to tell you our lives have been all sunshine and roses ever since, but I am definitely stronger for having gone through the experience.

Grace turned 10 this year, and we were interviewed for the shelter’s anniversary newsletter.  We invited some of the shelter staff to her birthday party. At the party, they asked me if I would be willing to speak at upcoming shelter events.  I was honored, but I also had dreams bigger than just speaking. I was very hesitant to do anything about them.

Thankfully, I had just joined a group created by Jon Acuff . It was a group of wonderful mentors and brilliant minds, who challenged me to do something about my dreams and to take a leap. I presented a proposal for a peer mentoring program to the shelter a couple of weeks later.  I knew that mentoring the homeless is something that is needed. Who is better qualified to do that than someone who has been in their shoes? I’ve now been running the program since August, and it’s one of the most fulfilling things I have ever done.

The people of Jon’s group didn’t stop there.  When I was in a car accident last month, the group helped keep me sane and some even helped with the mechanics’ bills.  When my first speaking engagement, a huge benefit gala at a fancy hotel, came up a few weeks ago, my wonderful friends from the group sent ball gowns for me to try on, sprung for my hair, makeup, and manicure for the event, and one of them even drove three hours out of her way to be at my side for everything from the salon experience through the gala itself.  She even brought treats for my kids, who were at home with the sitter!

In the end, a devastating experience that could have destroyed me and my family ended up being a catalyst. I can now be a blessing to others as a mentor and speaker for those who might not otherwise have a voice.  That’s the great thing about accountability:  Once you face it and forgive yourself, you make room for God to shower you with greater, more beautiful things from the dust.

————-

The Emergency Shelter of the Fox Valley and Project Saving Grace used with permission.

Author Bio:  Shanna Delap is a single mom who enjoys sewing, crafting, cooking, and reading everything from Tolstoy to the backs of cereal boxes.  She also loves to write, and is the author of the blogs Sweetpeas & Sour Apples  and The Clueless Homesteader.

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Apparently, that’s the wrong answer.

So it turns out the answer to this math problem was not, “The Eye of Sauron.”

For 113 more awesome Lord of the Rings jokes, follow my board, “Tom Bombadil’s Fridge.”

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Why do Christians lie so much?

I’ve been thinking a lot about this question lately. Why do we keep secrets? Why do we hide? Why do ministers fall? Why is the h word that people who don’t know Christ associate with people who do know Christ, “Hypocrite,” instead of “Honest?”

I think there are a host of reasons but there’s one that bothers me the most. My friend Reggie Joiner’s idea was actually the original spark for this. He’s some kind of super genius and runs the Orange Conference as well as an organization called Rethink.

He believes that sometimes the church just uses fun for outreach events. Once you’re in the church though, the fun is over. We’ll do crazy Vacation Bible Schools, community events and retreats, but once we’ve got you as members, the fun stops.

Now granted, your church is non-stop fun and this post is ridiculous for you. Fair enough, perhaps you go to one of those churches that constantly causes atheists to describe Christians as “hosts of the absolute best parties.” That might be happening in your zip code.

But the principle Reggie talks about is interesting and I think there’s an even more sinister version. Here it is:

Non Christians get grace. Christians get judgment.

I think far too often, if we’re gracious, we’re gracious to people who don’t believe and then judgmental to those who do.

Grace is an event that happens with salvation. But upon that moment, as you emerge new, you are expected to be new through and through.

It reminds me of the worship leader he told me he doesn’t sing the lyric “Prone to Wander” because he no longer is. He sings “Prone to Worship.” There’s this deep sense that our sinning days are over, our salvation days are here.

And that’s where lying comes in. Christians feel a need to be perfect and when they’re not, they feel the need to cover up. To hide what they’ve done or hide the fact that they’re still not the person they wanted to be by now. Pastors feel this pressure worst of all because leaders often worry that admitting any weakness calls into doubt all of their strengths.

We create shadow lives that shine on the outside, but crumble on the inside.

I don’t have an easy fix to this issue, but I will say I hope we’ll work on it.

When I became a Christian, I did not become immune to sin, I became in tune to how desperately I still needed grace.

Every day.

Grace is for non Christians.

Grace is for Christians too.

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Falling in love on a mission trip.

It’s practically a Christian law that if you go on a mission trip in high school or college, you have to fall in love with someone.

Don’t argue with me on this point. You buy a machete, a piece of art that proves you’ve been on a mission trip and fall in love. Then you promptly break up the day you get back.

I don’t care if you do, just promise me that you’ll wear this shirt which is based on this post I wrote.

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5 ways to write a Christian Twitter Profile.

One day, I looked up and realized I didn’t mention that I was a Christian in my Twitter bio.

I didn’t do this on purpose, but I have enjoyed the random doses of judgment about the state of my very soul this often earns me from other Christians.

Granted, about 50% of my tweets are about Jesus, but whatever, that doesn’t count. Realizing that, I started to research the most common ways to say, “I’m a Christian,” in a Twitter bio. Here is what I found:

1.The Emo Approach

Some people like to reiterate that they are the worst humans on the planet and in dire need of grace in their Twitter bio. These will say things like, “Dirty, broken, but forgiven” or, “Wretchedly in need of Christ’s beauty.” I kind of think of this what Paul’s twitter bio would have said, “Paul, formerly Saul (Please don’t follow that account anymore), chief of all sinners.”

2.Lord of the Ringsish

Some people prefer a little mystery in their bio so they say things that sound a little like something Aragorn might say: “Follower of the Way,” or “Crossing deep seas on dry land.” I like these, but always feel they should be ended by adding, “Winter is Coming.” (If you tell me that line is from another series I will laugh at you for doubting my nerd skills.)

3.Kinship

This one is probably the most common. Basically you say, “Daughter of the king” or “Son sitting by the throne.” Kind of the easy way to go and no one really spices it up. I’d like to see, “Brother of James” or “Playing racquetball with Samson.” Give me some flavor.

4.Old School DC Talk

If you listened to the best album DC Talk ever released you already know exactly what I am going to say. “Jesus Freak!” This is a pretty good angle to go with in Twitter.

5.Bible Verse

Forget saying you’re a Christian, just drop your favorite Bible verse. Oh, you want to read my bio? Philippians 4:13, mic drop. End scene like Eminem at the end of 8 Mile. Done son.

I am cool with all of those, but I recently saw one that topped them all.

I am not making this up. This is my favorite one:

Sister, friend & representative of the Lion of Judah

I like it for a few obvious reasons. First of all, they sucker punch you at the end of the statement. They woo you to sleep with some very boring sounding titles. Sister, friend, even representative is dull. And then? Wham! In your face! I represent a lion!

The second reason I like this is that the phrase “representative of the Lion of Judah” is pretty amazing. It sounds kind of like you’re his personal assistant. I see someone in a power suit walking up to a hostess at a restaurant and saying, “Do you have the table ready for the Lion of Judah? He prefers a booth.” Gold!

How about you though?

What does your Twitter bio say? (Post it in the comments!)

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