Thom S. Rainer's Blog, page 340

Four Thoughts from Non-Christians about Christians

Several weeks ago, I wrote a post about how non-Christians perceive Christians. The article was based on an interchange with one non-Christian lady on this blog. I was surprised at the number of responses, including those from a number of non-Christians. I am grateful for all who responded.

A few Christians were concerned that I might be compromising my beliefs and convictions by writing the post. To the contrary, I still hold firmly to the exclusivity of the gospel and the mandate to evangelize. But, while I am convicted about the never-changing message of the gospel, I am concerned how we messengers sometimes treat others who don’t believe as we do.

For now, I have provided four examples of what non-Christians are asking of Christians. They were all comments at different points on my blog. Each section represents a different non-Christian.

Demonstrate Respect and the Interest of Others

I can certainly understand that it might be very uncomfortable for you to witness – as a technique for attracting potential followers, it seems very forced and artificial, and it renders any attempt to express real friendship towards the recipient seem insincere and not a little sinister.

I’m an atheist, so you may be tempted to disregard my views. However, I’ve been on the receiving end of numerous attempts to witness, and I’ve never felt that any of the people who made these attempts had my interests at heart, or would offer me the basic respect of considering the possibility, however faint, that I’d put genuine thought into my position; that I might be sincere in my lack of belief.

Try to put yourself in the shoes of your prey – I suspect that you’ll become better people for making the effort.

Don’t Condescend and Discriminate

First I want to thank you for posting this, for being forthcoming and for all the encouraging comments.

I use the moniker darb because I live in the heart of the Bible belt and am concerned about repercussions of being a public atheist. We are, after all, the most reviled groups in America, even behind Muslims. I am concerned about hiring bias. I am concerned about downsizing bias. I am concerned about my children being ostracized or bullied. I am concerned because I have seen it happen.

It is SO refreshing to hear the accepting attitudes I hear in these comments. I only wish I could be assured that these were majority attitudes amongst Christians. I wish that good folks like you would speak out against those who would discriminate against me. I wish I could be myself without fearing proselytizing, condescension or worse. After all, we are all just humans trying to make our way in this uncertain world.

Really Care about the Non-Christian and Show It

This is very much how I tend to perceive approaches from would-be witnesses. I’ve read several posts in which people (believers) have expressed the desire to witness through ‘show’ rather than ‘tell’ and I’d personally have a lot more respect for someone whose life expressed the spirit of their religious belief as opposed to attempting to fill that quota. The Christians I’ve remembered with fondness were those who actually cared about other people; the ones who appeared to express the legalistic, judgmental and relentless and cultish urge to convert were, honestly, kind of a pain in the —. Not people I respected or would want know.

As a non-Christian, I have to say that 90% of these comments continue to back up the point from the article. Most of them talk about “waiting to develop a relationship before witnessing” or something of the sort. There are over 20 major religions in the world, never mind the number of smaller subsets. Has it ever just occurred to Christians that we just don’t believe the same thing you do? That we don’t think you’re right? That we don’t, at any point, want your prayers or your opinions on how we should think? If Christians are going to be so narrow minded that they are only going to have relationships with people that think the same thing they do, or think that they are better than people that don’t agree with them, why would we want to have a relationship? If you can’t look past my religious preferences (or lack thereof) and see me as a PERSON, I’ll just hang out with my open minded, non-preachy friends.

Demonstrate Compassion and Respect

Here’s a bright idea: STOP PRESSURING OTHERS TO JOIN YOUR RELIGION. If someone doesn’t want to join your church, that doesn’t make them a jerk. They’re entitled to their own beliefs, just like you’re entitled to yours. I’m sorry if that sounds harsh, but if you really want the rest of the world to accept you, then you need to accept the rest of the world. Stop focusing on how many souls you can save and start focusing on being a good person. And by ‘good person’, I mean being compassionate and generous, not paraphrasing a book written three thousand years ago on a street corner.

I don’t hate Christians, but because of the way I’ve been treated in the past, I’m wary of them. If you want to be respected, then do some respecting in return.

What Do You Think?

What do you Christians think about these admonitions from non-Christians? What do you who aren’t Christians want to say to the Christian community?

Evangelism and Email

By Chuck Lawless

It’s official. I no longer like e-mail.

That wasn’t always the case. I still remember discovering e-mail for the first time. My computer modem was as large as a vintage radio and as loud as a jet engine, but it allowed me to contact friends at a moment’s notice, at any time of the day or night. “You’ve got mail!” were welcomed words back then.

Not anymore. Not only does the constant vibration of my iPhone remind me that life is too busy, but the e-mails I receive sometimes only hinder communication. Most of us have experienced the anxiety of reading wrong emotions into an e-mail and/or explaining a misunderstood message we sent. The e-mail symbols designed to express emotion simply cannot replace give-and-take, ask and respond conversations when emotions are involved.

In other cases, e-mail provides a means to express much more – too much, and in much less God-honoring ways – than we would say personally. We give too little thought to our words when communication is between computer screens rather than two people looking each other in the eye. The buffer of cyberspace somehow permits us to be rude and ungodly in our interaction with others.

My biggest concern about e-mail, though, is that this medium makes it possible to send messages without ever talking to each other. I have in my archives dozens of messages from friends who write regularly, but whose actual voices I have not heard in years. Why pick up the phone when I can just send an e-mail? At least this way I know I will not get a busy signal or an answering machine. I am a strong introvert, but I still fear that face-to-face conversations have sometimes been unintentionally sacrificed on the altar of e-mail convenience.

Of course, my distaste for email is really only partial. I’m excited when I hear from long-lost friends who found me via the web. I can now easily communicate with missionaries around the world. Their concerns are distributed and prayers sent heavenward following just the click of a computer key. And, email has provided unprecedented opportunities for doing evangelism, especially for believers who might be less inclined to speak face-to-face about Jesus.

On the other hand, my concern that email promotes faceless communication is matched by a similar concern about current trends in evangelism. Think about it –

Evangelism in many churches is about believers responding to a guest who first visits the church rather than believers proactively sharing Christ. If the non-believer makes the first move, we are then ready to respond with the gospel.


Evangelism is sometimes reduced to “invite others to church, where someone else [that is, the preacher] will tell them about Jesus” during the sermon. In that case, nobody does personal evangelism.


In some congregations, evangelizing takes place more on the international mission field – as essential as that task is – than in a church member’s neighborhood. The same believer who travels overseas to speak of Christ through a translator often leapfrogs his own unbelieving neighbors who speak the same language.


Despite the New Testament emphasis on laity, many churches still relegate evangelism to hired clergy. As one church member told me, “We pay them to do that because they’re the ones trained for it.” Personal involvement in evangelism is thus equated with putting a check in the offering plate on Sunday.

I realize I may have just frustrated some readers, so I need to be clear here. I fully support using any God-honoring means to spread the gospel, and ignoring current technological advances means missing great opportunities now available. I want church members to appreciate God’s work through their church so much that they willingly invite their friends to attend. My heart beats with global missions, and I’ve seen church members more committed to local evangelism after returning from the mission field.

I also believe clergy must set the example in doing evangelism, and they should see the pulpit as one means of evangelizing. The preached gospel should always offer life to those who respond in repentance and faith. Hence, I am not discounting any of the evangelism methods and strategies listed above. I am simply saying they are not enough if evangelism is not also personal. 

Yes, write evangelistic emails, invite your neighbors and friends to church, follow up with guests, take mission trips, and expect your pastor to be a model. Prayerfully support all your church does to reach your community.

Don’t forget, though, to tell others about Jesus – and take the risk to do it face-to-face.

Chuck Lawless currently serves as Professor of Evangelism and Missions and Dean of Graduate Studies at Southeastern Seminary.

You can connect with Dr. Lawless on both Twitter and Facebook.

Four Keys to Planning for Church Health

Based on both research and anecdotal evidence, I estimate that nine out of every ten churches in America are growing at a slower place than their community—if they are growing at all. That is not a good sign for the church in America.

Through the feedback I’ve received on this blog over the past two years, it has become overwhelmingly evident that the spiritual health of churches and pastors is of great concern. Many have asked how to transform the churches in the 90% that are not growing into ones like the 10% that are.

This is no easy task, but it can be done.

First, we have to accept our responsibility as leaders. Pastors are not in their role simply because of giftedness or desire—though both of those things are important. Pastors exist in their roles, first and foremost, because God has ordained that they be there. Your role as a leader is a commission; and assignment from the God of the universe. We will not see transformation in our local churches until pastors recognize their role in leading the church to transformation.

God doesn’t give us church leaders so that they alone will do the work of the church. He gives us leaders to equip the body to do ministry. We say we want to equip the saints for the work of ministry, but do we really accomplish this?

Our research says no. And it’s not even close.

Knowing Where to Go

Over half of all pastors we surveyed have no intentional plan for discipling all ages in their church. Even more distressing is that the number is smallest when referring to children and youth. Not only are we not involving our adults in ministry, we are failing to train the next generation.

So how do we remedy this? Here are four ways to start:

Create a plan. Pastors are planners. It’s what they do. They lay out in-depth and intentional plans for so many things done in the lives of our churches. But does your church have a plan to encourage the spiritual growth of your members?
Create buy-in from the congregation. One of the most effective ways to create buy-in is to walk through this plan using collective input. Create advocates out of church members, not followers.
Create a culture of disciple-making. Every church has a culture. Unfortunately, for too many, little thought is given to the culture of our church. Culture creation happens as churches and their leaders constantly repeat, in both word and deed, the desired behaviors intended to be primary in the new culture.
Stay faithful to the plan. As the leader of the church, you must believe in and champion the church above everyone else. More than anyone else you are the gatekeeper of your church’s culture and intended destination. Don’t develop a plan or process that you are not committed to, and once you have developed it, sell out to it.

Churches need a plan for growth. They need to know how to get from where they are to where God intends for them to be. But the problem is most churches don’t know where they currently are. Not only does a plan not exist, many churches haven’t assessed their current situation. That’s why assessments are vital.

We love to measure in the church. In my denomination, we have long said that the typical measurements are “budgets, baptisms and buildings.” But I’m not convinced those are the best measurements for us to be concerned with. I would suggest that, while measuring worship attendance is important, measuring group attendance and service engagement are possibly even more important.

Knowing Where You Are

After my post on the autopsy of a deceased church, I was flooded with requests from pastors wanting a tool to assess the spiritual health of their congregation. That’s where the Transformational Church Assessment Tool (TCAT) comes in.

The TCAT provides your church with the ability to assess the health of your specific congregation, celebrate its areas of strength, and address its areas of concern. Old measures of church health have some value but often prove inadequate by themselves. We believe that this instrument can help churches more clearly understand their involvement in disciple-making, active biblical engagement, and prayerful dependence on God…along with increasing, intentional participation in mission and ministry activities.

That’s why through the end of August I am offering a special package exclusively for my blog readers. Pastors who sign their church up for the TCAT will also receive the Transformational Discipleship Assessment (TDA) for their personal use at no cost. This way, you have the ability to assess both the spiritual health of your church and your personal spiritual health at the same time.

If you’re interested in assessing the spiritual health of your church and formulating a plan for spiritual growth, you can get started here.

(Use promo code CR00332G at checkout to have the TDA added for free.)

Pray For First Baptist Hot Springs

Location: Hot Springs, Arkansas

Pastor: John McCallum

Worship Times: 8:15 & 10:50 AM (Central Time)

Fast Facts: First Baptist Hot Springs is 176 years old, the oldest existing organization in Hot Springs, Arkansas. Despite its age, the church is a forward-thinking, kingdom-centered, missions-active church. Their mission is “Called to care for God, for others, and for the world.”

The church has strategic mission partnerships in Japan, Russia, Paris/Senegal, Czech Republic, India, Honduras, Chicago, Alaska, and Arlington, TX. Please pray as the church sends people on 13 international mission trips this year.

The church led Camp Hot Springs, a camp for at-risk kids from the local school district, and Upward Basketball camps this summer. Pray that God will open doors to share the gospel as they follow up and build relationships with families that have no church connections.

Also pray for a smooth transition and for richer times of worship as a new music and worship pastor joins the First Baptist Hot Springs family.

Website: www.fbchsark.org

“Pray for . . .” is the Sunday blog series at ThomRainer.com. We encourage you to pray for these churches noted every Sunday. Please feel free to comment that you are praying as well.

Don’t Take That Job or Promotion

It’s the American way. Keep moving up the ladder. Success is measured by how far you climb. Your self-worth depends upon it.

You’ve heard those clichés. Perhaps you’ve been pressured by those societal pushes. Granted, a number of people continue to move from promotion to promotion, better pay to better pay, and they thrive in their new challenges.

But for a number of people, that next job is a disaster waiting to happen. It could be in another organization, or it could be a promotion where you are right now. And though it’s not always considered “the American way,” sometimes the best thing you can do is say no.

Family and Personal Reasons

I was in recent conversation with a pastor of a church. The church has an attendance around 250. He has recently been inundated with opportunities to move to larger churches, including a key staff position at a megachurch. For now, he has said no for a number of reasons, most of them related to his family.

The pastor understands God’s call in the context of his family and their specific needs. His only ambition is to please God and to be a godly leader of his family.

I was in another conversation with an extremely smart lady in the corporate world. She has all the abilities and intellect to move rapidly up the corporate ladder. But she is happy in her present role, and has no desire to do anything differently, at least for now. The prestige of promotions and higher pay means little when she is already content and happy in her current position.

Both this man and this woman said no, even though I have little doubt they would have excelled in the other roles they could have had. But other times we need to say no because the potential job is simply not a fit for who we are.

The Peter Principle and Jim Collins’ Bus

Laurence J. Peter and Raymond Hull, in their 1969 book The Peter Principle, observed that employees tend to rise to their level of incompetence. As they do well in one position, they are promoted. If they do well in that position, they will be promoted again. Eventually they are promoted to a position where they cannot perform well.

I prefer Jim Collins’ metaphor of the bus in his classic book Good to Great. The bus represents the organization. Those organizations that do well give a priority to “getting the right people on the bus.” But Collins notes that it’s not only important to get them on the bus, but to get them in “the right seat on the bus.” Simply stated, some people do well in some jobs, and they don’t do well in others.

A few years ago, a man asked me forthrightly if he should accept a position as pastor of a church. Since he asked, I responded in all honesty that I saw his abilities and gifts more suited for his current role as a support staff rather than as a lead pastor. He took the lead pastor position anyway. He spent two miserable years in that role before being encouraged to move on by leaders in the congregation.

I have seen too many people in the corporate world attracted by the money and prestige of the “next job,” who did not have the skills necessary to do the job well. They become miserable as they experience failure after failure. They are often fired or demoted.

Looking in the Mirror

Nothing is wrong with ambition. Nothing is wrong with desiring advances in career and life. What is wrong is thinking that the next step, the next promotion, the next organization, and the next pay increase will bring us joy. That attitude makes joy ever elusive.

Even worse, that next step or next organization may prove to be disastrous. We can find that we are not qualified for the position or that our abilities and gifts do not align well for our work. And so we discover that the position that we thought would bring us joy instead brings us frustration and misery.

The secure man or woman looks honestly in the mirror.  He or she knows where the best fit is for his or her work and career. And that means that sometimes the seemingly good offer from the much-desired organization is not really as good as we first thought. So we say no to that new job or promotion. And in doing so we begin to learn where true joy is found and where true contentedness resides.

Five Qualities to Look for When Hiring — Rainer on Leadership #15

Podcast Episode #015

Subscribe via iTunes • Subscribe via RSS 

This week, we explore five qualities to look for when hiring a new team member. These qualities apply to any level of employment and in both church and secular hiring processes. Based on this post, the five qualities to look for are:

Character
Competency
Chemistry
Alignment
Trust

Near the end of the episode, I also share some questions and examples you can use to help judge potential candidates on these five qualities. It is vital to have the right people on your teams. Looking for these five qualities when hiring is essential to making your team the best it can be.

Episode Sponsor

I’d like to thank this week’s sponsor: Ministry Grid. At MinistryGrid.com you’ll find more than 1,000 video sessions on topics, ranging from parking ministry to polity, with more added continually. You can even upload your own content, turn off unwanted content, and put your church’s own logo and colors on the site. An intuitive Learning Management System makes assigning courses and tracking progress a snap. It’s training made simple. For more information and to get three months free, visit ministrygrid.com

Feedback

If you have a question you would like answered on the show, fill out the form on the podcast page here at ThomRainer.com. If we use your question, you’ll receive a free autographed copy of I Am a Church Member.

Friday Is for Freebies: In Defense of the Bible

My giveaway this Friday is a pair of apologetics resources.

First is In Defense of the Bible. It gathers exceptional articles by accomplished scholars addressing and responding to all of the major contemporary challenges to the divine inspiration and authority of Scripture. The book begins by looking at philosophical and methodological challenges to the Bible—questions about whether or not it is logically possible for God to communicate verbally with human beings; what it means to say the Bible is true in response to postmodern concerns about the nature of truth; defending the clarity of Scripture against historical skepticism and relativism. Final chapters take on ethical, scientific, and theological challenges— demonstrating the Bible’s moral integrity regarding the topics of slavery and sexism; harmonizing exegetical and theological conclusions with the findings of science; addressing accusations that the Christian canon is the result of political and theological manipulation; ultimately defending the Bible as not simply historically reliable and consistent, but in fact the Word of God.

The second is the black, bonded leather version of The Apologetics Study Bible. This Bible will help today’s Christians better understand, defend, and proclaim their Christian beliefs in this age of increasing moral and spiritual relativism. More than one-hundred key questions and articles placed throughout the volume about faith and science prompt a rewarding study experience at every reading.

Since summer is winding down, to be eligible to win, tell us your favorite memory from this summer.

The deadline to enter is midnight CDT this Saturday.  We will draw one winner from the entries on Monday morning.

By entering, you acknowledge and accept the terms of the promotion.

Notable Voices — July 25, 2012

Why Average People Make an Excellent Church — Sam Rainer

Sam explains how average people make for an excellent church because they are likely to resonate with the largest group in your community on a personal level.

 

3 Challenges of Being a Pastor’s Wife — Eric Geiger

One of the more popular recent posts here at the blog was on seven things pastors’ wives wish they had been told before they became pastors’ wives. Eric has a related article on three challenges pastors’ wives face.

 

6 Ways Small Churches Can Love Their Communities — Daniel Darling

Dan speaks from personal experience in sharing these six tips for small churches to reach their community.

 

Measuring Church Health: How many kids will attend? — Tony Morgan

Too often, when children’s numbers are low, the blame falls on the children’s ministry director. Tony explains why things aren’t always that simple.

 

Persevering in Evangelism: Reflections on a Godly Stranger — Geoff Robson

Evangelism takes perseverance. Geoff’s story and this post are great examples of how perseverance pays off when sharing your faith.

 

The Wedding Vows: 20 Years Later — Steve McCoy

On his 20th wedding anniversary, Steve shares some personal reflections on the traditional wedding vows and how he’s seen them play out in his marriage. It’s a raw, personal, and encouraging look at what makes marriages work.

How Many Hours Must a Pastor Work to Satisfy the Congregation?

I recently wrote a post based on a survey I did on a pastor’s workweek. I also included better research and more accurate information from five-year old data from LifeWay Research.

In this post, I want to approach the issue from a slightly different perspective. I want to ask the question: How many hours must a pastor work each week to satisfy the congregation? Ultimately, I prefer to hear from pastors and church members and get their perspective.

An experiment I tried several years ago, though, might prove instructive. When I was a pastor in St. Petersburg, Florida, I gave a survey to the twelve deacons in the church (I jokingly said we had eleven good deacons and one Judas!). I listed several congregational responsibilities and asked them to share the minimum amount of time I should average in each area each week. I listed about twenty areas; but they were free to add other responsibilities to the blank lines.

I’m not sure exactly what I was anticipating. I just know that I was shocked when I tallied the results. In order to meet those twelve deacons minimum expectations I had to fulfill the following responsibilities each week:

Prayer at the church: 14 hours
Sermon preparation: 18 hours
Outreach and evangelism: 10 hours
Counseling: 10 hours
Hospital and home visits: 15 hours
Administrative functions: 18 hours
Community involvement: 5 hours
Denominational involvement: 5 hours
Church meetings: 5 hours
Worship services/preaching: 4 hours
Other: 10 hours

Total: 114 hours/week

If I met just the minimum expectations of twelve deacons, I would have to work more than 16 hours a day for seven days a week. Or I could take one day off of work each week, and work 19 hours a day for six days a week. And remember, I still would only meet the minimum expectations of twelve people in the church, not the entire membership.

Clearly a pastor will sense the tension of so many factors competing for the limited hours in a week. And clearly no one can ever humanly meet all those expectations.

Do these numbers surprise you? If you are a layperson, what are your workweek expectations of a pastor? If you are a pastor, how do you handle such expectations?

9 Reasons Why Church Leaders Struggle with Prayer

By Chuck Lawless

John, a leader in a church I assisted as a consultant, admitted to me what I’d heard before from seminary students and church leaders alike: “Dr. Lawless, I don’t always pray like I should. I know better, but prayer isn’t easy.” I’ve heard something similar so many times that I’ve begun asking for more details. These findings are anecdotal, but here are my general conclusions about why church leaders struggle with prayer.

Leaders are “fixers” by nature. Most leaders don’t readily admit a need for help. Instead, we are problem solvers who seek solutions, attempt answers, and try again if the first answer doesn’t work. Indeed, our followers expect leaders to come up with solutions. Our persistence and tenacity to do so – both good traits in themselves – sometimes push prayer to a last resort option.
We never learned how to pray.  Churches make this mistake with most spiritual disciplines: we tell believers what to do, but don’t teach them how to do it. “Pray. Pray. You must pray,” we proclaim. When we tell but don’t teach, though, we set believers up for discouragement and failure. If leaders are honest, we’ll admit that we, too, have much to learn about how to pray.
Prayer has become more about ritual than about relationship. This reason relates directly to the previous one. We know we should pray, even if we don’t know how, so we go through the motions of prayer. It is not a relationship with a living Lord that calls us to prayer; it is instead only religious ritual. Ritual seldom leads to a consistent, vibrant prayer life.
Prayerlessness can be hidden.  No one in our church needs to know about this struggle. We can talk about prayer, teach about prayer, write about prayer, and even lead corporately in prayer – all without anyone knowing that personal prayer is sporadic at best. This kind of hiddenness is an enemy of heartfelt prayer.
We don’t really believe prayer works. Sure, we teach otherwise about prayer. No church leader I know would teach that prayer is ineffective. Nevertheless, our prayer life often suggests otherwise. Sometimes we don’t pray at all. When we do pray, we’re too often surprised when God does respond. Surprise is one indicator we’re not convinced about the power of prayer.
We have never been broken under God’s hand. The apostle Paul, who was a leader extraordinaire, learned the power of strength in weakness (2 Cor. 12:7-10). Faced with a thorn in the flesh, he pleaded with God to remove it. God instead sovereignly used the thorn to weaken the apostle, who experienced God’s strength at his weakest moments. It is in our weakness that we learn how to pray, but leaders naturally fight against weakness.
Leaders read the Word in a one-sided way. Leaders are often teachers who read the Word for information transmission more than life transformation. When we approach the Word that way, we miss the opportunity to be in dialogue with God. Our Bible reading – even when preparing for teaching or preaching – should bring us to praise, confession, and obedience. It should lead us into prayerful conversation with God.
Some leaders have simply lost hope. It happens. Church leaders who prayed more consistently in the past sometimes lose hope under the weight of church conflict, family struggles, or health concerns. Unanswered prayer leads to faithlessness, which leads to prayerlessness.
We miss the gospel focus on the prayer life of Jesus. I love the four Gospels, but I admit to reading them for many years without meditating on Jesus’ prayer life. A seminary professor challenged me to read the Gospel of Luke with this focus in mind, and my prayer life has never been the same.

In fact, church leader, I give you that same challenge. In your quiet time this week, read these texts. Note how Jesus prayed. Listen to His teachings. Think deeply about the Word. Then, respond to Him in prayer. Take the first step toward being a praying church leader.

Luke 3:21-22; 4:42 (cf. Mark 1:35); 5:15-16; 6:12-13; 6:27-28; 9:16, 18, 28-29; 10:1-2, 21; 11:1-13; 18:1-8, 9-14; 19:45-46; 20:45-47; 21:36; 22:17-19, 31-32, 39-46; 23:33-34, 46; 24:30, 50-51.

Chuck Lawless currently serves as Professor of Evangelism and Missions and Dean of Graduate Studies at Southeastern Seminary.

You can connect with Dr. Lawless on both Twitter and Facebook.