Page Turner's Blog, page 36

I Miss Good Sportsmanship & I Miss Thinking Adults Were Mature

“Good game,” we’d all say as we slapped hands together. Every little league game. Every soccer match. Usually not after an impromptu scrimmage in gym class. But basically, every time we played a formal match — one in which we all had uniforms with the team name emblazoned on them — we’d line up afterward,  » Read more

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Aromantic & Polyamorous? Yes, It DOES Happen!

Hi Page, 

I really appreciated your article “There *Are* Asexual Polyamorous People, You Know.” It made perfect sense to me because being asexual and being aromantic are very different things. Now it’d be weird if you said there were polyamorous people who were aromantic. That’s not a thing,  » Read more

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You Can Make a Resolution Anytime, New Year Not Required

I’m a person who has made an awful lot of personal resolutions — to change, to quit something, to stick to something new.

Have I always been successful? No.

But sometimes I have been. Sometimes the resolution has stuck. I lost some weight. I finally stopped buying my own excuses and launched a successful writing career.  » Read more

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You Can’t Force People to Be Happy for You By Being Happy for Them

I had a friend once upon a time. When I met her, she had a couple of strong business endeavors going on. I looked up to her. In my mind, she was a force. And I supported her businesses. Whenever I could, I bought items from her. I recommended her work to other people. I commissioned gifts from her for people in my life —  » Read more

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Why I Never Argue With Someone When They Break Up With Me

Okay, here’s the deal. If someone wants to break up with me, I say “okay.” I accept it. I might ask why if I’m curious. But I don’t argue with them about it.

Why?

Well, here’s the way I see it. When someone decides they want to break up with me,  » Read more

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What Happened When My Phone Unplugged Me

The battery on my phone stopped working a while back. The first troubling sign came the day we drove up to the Red River — to get out of the house. The crossing was eerily beautiful — like something from an alien planet. Naturally, I tried to use my phone to snap a picture. And even though I had greater than 80% battery life,  » Read more

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“I’m a Polyamorous Person Who Keeps Compromising by Having Monogamous Relationships & Feeling Bad. Why?”

I’m a polyamorous person that keeps ending up in relationships with monogamous people. Then I compromise and feel wrong, unseen, miserable, and wish to stay polyamorous solo. Then it happens again. Why?

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This is an interesting question, letter writer. To be perfectly honest, you didn’t give me a lot to work with here.  » Read more

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Unlearning Is Much Harder Than Learning

One of the very first things you learn about when you go to school for psychology is conditioning. Most folks are familiar with classical conditioning — Pavlov’s dogs, all that jazz. It’s based on producing involuntary responses to a certain stimulus. In the case of that famous experiment, dogs learned to salivate when a bell rang —  » Read more

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Invoking Someone’s Middle Name Can Have a Psychological Effect

It’s basically a trope at this point. When a child is in trouble, a parent calls them by their full name: First, middle, and last.

“John Quincy Adams, you get right down here this minute!”

Fun fact: I wanted to use Abraham Lincoln as an example, but he didn’t have a middle name.  

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When Dealing with Other People, It’s Important to Account for the Possibility That They’re Different Than You Are

A reader wrote in with the following suggestion: How about an article about how to deal with it if your metamour does presents but you don’t?

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On the surface, it’s a fairly simple issue. So let’s say that your metamour really wants to give and receive presents. That it’s important to them.  » Read more

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