Exponent II's Blog, page 271

An Open Letter to President Nelson #MormonMeToo

Dear President Nelson, [image error]

By now, I’m sure you have been briefed on the horrific details of a conversation between high-level priesthood leader Joseph Bishop and one of his victims of sexual assault.

More chilling than the details of his assault upon a young woman, a missionary under his care, it is revealed not only that he was a serial predator, but that high-ranking priesthood authorities over him knew about it. We have a problem in the church with men in authority sexually assaulting the vulnerable in our ranks, and the church leadership has not always handled these situations appropriately or wisely.

President Nelson, I don’t expect this to be news to you. Clearly the church has been aware of abuse in the ranks for some time; it’s the reasoning behind such measures as windows in every door, the prohibition upon men teaching primary alone, as well as the crackdown on anti-pornography rhetoric. The church knows that too many Mormon men abuse women and children. There have been attempts to address it.

But these approaches aren’t sufficient and they aren’t working. I remember being a young girl sitting in a cabin at a multi-Stake girls camp, and finding myself the only female in the room to have not experienced sexual assault at the hands of a priesthood holder (one even at the hands of her bishop father). I cannot number the rooms in which this realization has happened – and I am weary of the burdens and wounds that my sisters bear silently on their spirits. I’m sad that good men leave the church when they see abuse. I’m sad that bad advice and poor support is often offered to both victims and perpetrator. I’m sad that men in authority are often believed and protected before vulnerable women and children are.

Even in this transcript, President, we hear Joseph Bishop blame his predatory sexual violence upon his own sexual addiction and affection-less marriage, half-hearted in shouldering his culpability.

But behavioral addiction is not the same thing as serial, premeditated sexual violence.

In the coming weeks, the Exponent blog will be launching a multi-pronged response to this terrible reality. We invite you and other high-ranking church officials to follow, watch, and listen to the voices that speak here. Victims will speak to other victims, to their assailants, to their former selves. Mental health professionals will offer advice on how a victim should proceed, and how sexual addicts should manage their situation in safe and proactive ways. And finally, professional policy makers will write policy and offer suggestions as to the changes that need to be made in the church in order to protect victims and prevent future abuses from ever taking place.

I offer my witness that as sincere repentance happens, the church will be blessed in ways we cannot comprehend now.

President Nelson, I also offer my hope to you directly, that the church under your direction and leadership will respond humbly, and change in such a complete fashion that there can be no doubt as to the sincerity of the repentance and the church’s dedication to the safety of all people. There’s no coincidence that this comes to light just as you find yourself under the mantle of presidency and prophethood. Who knows, whether you are come to the kingdom for such a time as this?

Yours in faith,

AdelaHope

 

 

***********

 

To the LDS Community in general, and the Exponent community specifically:

Dear ones, we have hope here at the Exponent that the coming days will bring real discussions where we look together for ways to systematically protect the vulnerable from sexual assault and exploitation. As these discussions happen in your homes, in your wards, in your associations, we invite you to bring them here. We are asking for open letters from survivors sharing their wisdom, and posts from professionals sharing theirs. A guest post may be published with whatever degree of anonymity that you prefer.

The Exponent is built upon the premise that it is important and valuable for women to share our stories. We are asking now for those stories, but also for wisdom and knowledge and expertise.

Kindest Regards,

The Exponent Blog

Book Review: Certain Women by Linda K. Burton

Certain Women was a talk given by Linda K. Burton in the April 2017 General Conference. We have already addressed the talk here. (spoiler: we liked it!)

 

[image error]This book is something that is typical within Deseret Book, in that it is a word-for-word reproduction of the talk, printed in hardcover with art image and cut outs. This particular book is probably too physically small for a coffee table book (7.5 inches or about 18cm square), and because it has no additional writing content, I am honestly not sure what the purpose the book serves.

 

To be clear, I liked the talk. And I like the gorgeous, bright, water-colour artwork that is include within the pages of the book (maybe buy it for the artwork! Sheryl Dickert Smith did a fabulous job!). I suspect that it will make an excellent “busy book” for my children, if the sacrament meeting talks on a Sunday don’t retain their attention—  the wide spacing, and abundant artwork will be something they enjoy and yet retain focus on the spirit. And it might be a good book for those who would choose to gift it to a “less active” person.

 

In all honesty, I don’t see the reason behind this marketing of a General Conference talk in hard copy. I have a friend who purchased a “book” similar to this a few years ago that was a word-for-word reprint of a talk by then-President Uchtdorf. She was so upset at feeling ripped off that she returned the book and demanded her money back. So perhaps this kind of book is better suited for those who are not familiar with or those who do not watch, listen or read all of General Conference.

 

This book is not political, and I think most Mormon women would appreciate it as a gift, even though they probably recall the talk from general conference. I love that rather than following the format of books like this being based on men’s general conference talks—that this is by a woman. And the artwork is grand.

 

But you know the old metaphorical saying, “why pay for the cow when you can get the milk for free?” You can get this for free right here on LDS.org. Just sayin.

 

Should you be interested in this as a busy book for tweens trapped in less-than-attention grabbing sacrament meetings, you can purchase the book through Amazon for $15.99 US.

 

Certain Women

The Shape of My Lenten Journey

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The early process

Involved the identification of

A problem

A deficit

Strategies to resolve it

Embracing a particular goal.

I made a big effort at the beginning

Some early success

Mixed with

Reward

Benefit

Fulfilment

Then celebrated the process.

“Lent is a blessing on the road to self-improvement.”

Life took over.

Early success

Transformed into failures of all sizes

Teaching a greater lesson

Accompanied by feelings of futility

As if I should have known

This lesson

All along.

I reveal my folly anew

Each Lenten season.

Near the end

The initial goal died,

Good intentions

Swallowed by my predictable humanity

A condition I could not tame or shake.

I’m now anticipating Holy Week then Easter

All will be made new somehow.

I will try again next year.

Perhaps something must die,

Work itself into a mess

For Easter (or God?) to be waiting

Ready to renew

Revive

Resurrect

My willingness to

Let go.

The {hidden} misogyny of reactivation efforts

[image error]How many active, full-tithe-paying Melchizedek Priesthood holders does it take to form a ward? No, it’s not a lightbulb joke.

15 — to fully staff a bishopric with clerk and secretary, high Priests group leadership, Elders quorum presidency, young men presidency and a ward mission leader.

How many active, full-tithe-paying Relief Society sisters does it take to form a ward? Well, technically none. While total membership for a new ward ranges from 150-300 minimum depending on location, there are no requirements for how many women are needed to form a ward.

“Prospective Elders” have their attendance at meetings tracked in church systems and are expected to progress toward ordination.  They are regularly discussed at PEC meetings and included in ward conference reports. There is no corollary for a prospective Relief Society sister.

Missionary efforts throughout the world prioritize finding, teaching and baptizing men through district goals and mission-wide reporting indicators.

As it’s organized now, the church requires men to fill its core leadership positions, so it should come as no surprise that the majority of reactivation efforts coming down from the general level are aimed at retaining, reclaiming, and ordaining existing/prospective Melchizedek Priesthood holders.

One such reactivation effort has been recently launched from Elders Ballard and Rasband. Unlike come past efforts which have focused on reactivating families recommended by each organization, this renewed emphasis for reaching out to less-active Melchizedek Priesthood holders is more of the same old strategy in updated packaging: Keep the men in the Sacrament pews and filling the callings.   Despite the PEC having the unique designation to “meet regularly to discuss Priesthood matters,” this initiative for reactivating formerly active, ordained men is a task given to the entire ward council.  Reactivating prospective ward priesthood leadership is of high enough priority that we even need the women’s contributions, ideas, work, and combined human resource meeting time!

The new/old initiative has already been rolled-out over wide areas of the United States and is well-organized into specific steps: select 2-3 less-active MP holders, gather intel on their life’s personal details, select appropriate fellowshippers from the ward to visit them, make appointments, cite authority “We are here to visit you at the request of Bishop _____ and two apostles of Jesus Christ, Elder Ballard and Elder Rasband.”  Teach a lesson, promise blessings, exercise the priesthood, follow-up, continue in prayer. It’s a carefully detailed process with the desired result being that the man (+/- his family) returns to full activity and temple blessings.

When I asked our Exponent II facebook group why they thought the emphasis of this program was for men-first and families-second, a variety of hypotheses presented:

“There are already more active women than men. Women are more faithful and active. It makes sense that this outreach is going to the demographic that needs it.”

“If the men come back, their wives and families come along. It makes sense to target them first.”

“We need men to fill all the ward leadership callings. Without men, the ward couldn’t function. It’s a move for the ward’s longevity.”

It is pedestalizing to a toxic degree to believe that since women are “naturally more faithful” and stay active in greater percentage, that they do not require general-level reactivation efforts like the men do.   To my knowledge, no women-specific reactivation effort of this scale has ever been launched from church HQ.  The men get it it packaged and reheated like bad left-overs again and again.

If women are more likely to stay active, and if retaining men in church activity is of such high priority, why don’t the ward’s efforts go toward strengthening his wife and family first, in the hopes that he would follow their righteous examples, rather than the opposite?

Simple: by targeting men in less active families first, it emphasizes that men lead their families in spiritual matters, regardless of faithfulness or activity, and discredits the power of women to be a moving spiritual force for their husbands. These asymmetrical efforts to reactivate men rarely go through reactivating their wives in hopes that he will “come along” with her.  It illustrates an underlying belief that men and women are not equal leaders of spiritual matters in their homes.

As far as how to fill leadership callings with active, capable and qualified individuals, our friends at Ordain Women have pretty well fleshed that one out.

After all of the meeting-minutes spent discussing and human-hours dedicated to reactivating men, is it really even the right approach to begin with? Many sincere, loving attempts to extend friendship to sisters in the Relief Society happen every day, through the hands of visiting teachers, compassionate service leaders and good people trying to do the work of Christ.  Do the menfolk really require an additional, more corporate approach than what local wards and stakes are already doing for their women? Perhaps the men should pattern their next program after the visiting teaching model: reach out one-by one, be a friend, do what he needs, show love without judgment, accept him where he is and make room for him in whatever state he comes.

More importantly: the work of stewardship and salvation must be seen as pertaining to the individual regardless of sex, ordination, marital status, or leadership potential.   Funneling a ward’s resources into following a program primarily targeted at  men only works against a ward council’s unique inspiration about who from their ward needs the most loving care and attentive visits.

Guys, take note: the women are already doing it right.

Last LDS General Conference, I tallied male and female speakers. Twitter went nuts.

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Tally of Talks by Female and Male LDS General Conference Speakers, October 2017

Last October, I did a shocking, scandalous thing: I tallied the number of talks by men and women as I listened to General Conference and tweeted my (totally predictable) results.

My first tweet, with only Women’s Session included in the tally, showed three female speakers and one male. A male always gives the concluding speech at women’s session.  (There is no reciprocity;  women are not invited to participate in the male-only priesthood session.)

By the fourth talk of Saturday morning, there had been an even total number of talks by male and female speakers, echoing the approximate ratio in the Mormon population. This would be the last moment of parity in General Conference–but calling it parity is a stretch, since most male Mormons had only listened to one woman speak so far; three of those talks by women took place at Women’s Session.

As Conference continued, the gap between the number of female and male speakers widened and my counting drew more attention on Twitter. The discussion frequently turned to the math in my simple tally. Over and over again, people reminded me to include Women’s Session. (I already had.) Several argued that I should be looking at the ratio of how many of the nine eligible women spoke, instead of a male-female ratio.

“I feel like with 9 called women in the general authorities vs over 90 men called, 5/9 is pretty good,” was a typical comment.

But that raises the question, why should only nine women in the entire church body be considered eligible to speak? Wouldn’t the church benefit from a larger, more diverse a pool of female speakers? What if male speakers were drawn from a pool of only nine eligible men? (Conference would be so much shorter…)

“Wouldn’t it be strange if we had a whole session of #LDSconf without a single male speaker?” I  asked Twitter after the Saturday afternoon session, which had included six male speakers and zero female speakers.

“Considering that would mean no talks by the priesthood leadership, yes. Yes it would be weird. Or, it’s be Women’s session.” answered one man. He was right on his first point; in our church, it is considered mandatory to hear from the priesthood (i.e., men) but women’s perspectives are thought of as unnecessary or optional. He was wrong on the second point: a man speaks at every Women’s Session. In fact, usually the male speaker at Women’s Session receives more speaking time than any of the female speakers.

Sunday morning began with a talk by a woman. It would be the only talk by a woman all day. While the last speaker was speaking, I tweeted my final tally, without comment. This is when Twitter went nuts. Lots of (male) people were angry–not because so few women had the opportunity to speak, but because I had documented the number:

“And this is helpful in what way?“
“Who gives a #RatsAss“
“So either God is sexist, or the leaders are not truly inspired?“

Some men tweeted scriptures at me…not in an uplifting way. One  of them was more memorable than others because after his passive-aggressive scripture rant (“Way to swat at a gnat and swallow a camel….“), he followed up with an apology tweet: “I’m genuinely sorry for responding in the way I did. It was not Christlike. God bless you in your walk as I need to be blessed in mine.” (Apology accepted.)

While the majority of people who were angry at me for tallying were male, some women shared the sentiment, such as one woman who reposted my final tally (which I remind you, contained no comment from me at all, either positive or negative), with this little jibe: “This is why I hate social media bcuz of people like this” (i.e., people like me).

Why would a simple tally generate such strong reactions? After all, anyone who watches conference, or looks at the conference address Table of Contents, could easily count the number of female speakers themselves. For that matter, they could probably guess the number without bothering to count, since it has been about the same for years without much variation. My tally was no exposé.

I think one woman on Twitter explained best: “It never bothered me before but it does now because others pointed it out. But where does it get me? Just upset and feeling less than.“[image error]

That is the crux of it: counting the number of female speakers upsets people because the number itself is so very, very, bad. We don’t want to see the number because it is much too low, and that low number means something. When so few women are invited to expound doctrine at our most important and sacred events, implicit messages are sent:

Women are not spiritual authorities.
Women are not necessary.
Women have little to teach the church, especially its male members.
Women’s perspectives don’t matter.
Female diversity doesn’t matter; all women are about the same.

These messages affect how we see and treat the women around us. As women, these messages affect how we see ourselves.

The next General Conference is coming soon and since last October, there have been some changes in the LDS Church. Priesthood Session and Women’s Session will now take place half as often, on alternating conferences.  This could be an opportunity to hear from more women in General Sessions, where men are more likely to benefit from hearing women’s voices. After all, those nine eligible women will not be needed as often at Women’s Session.  Or, just as likely, the church could continue to limit female participation in General Sessions to only two speakers, resulting in even fewer talks by women each year.

Church curricula has also changed since last October. Now, even more of our Sunday meetings revolve around reviewing General Conference talks. If female speakers continue to be severely limited during General Conference, even our weekly meetings will be largely devoid of women’s perspectives.

It is time to increase the number of female speakers at General Conference. I would prefer to see that done by expanding the pool  of eligible female speakers. There is no doctrinal reason for limiting female speakers to a pool of nine women and there are so many practical and spiritual benefits that could be achieved by learning from a larger number of diverse Mormon women. Let’s replace the implicit messages we are sending by excluding women with actual messages delivered by women at the pulpit.

An Interview with Womanist Ethicist Emilie M. Townes

[image error]When I entered graduate school to do women’s studies in religion, womanist theology and ethics were revelations. I entered the program somewhat familiar with feminist theology, but I was totally ignorant about womanism. Womanist theology and ethics were the most intellectually and spiritually invigorating approaches to religion and ethics that I came across.

[image error][image error]I will never forget the first time I read ethicist Katie Cannon describing what agency looks like when living within a wider contexts that deny black people full agency. Likewise, I was blown away by the way theologian Dolores Williams’  found an archetype for black women in the Hebrew Bible figure of Hagar, who experienced oppression from both men and women, slavery, forced surrogacy, homelessness and more. In Hagar’s story, Williams saw spiritual truths that resonated with the experience of black women — namely, that God was a God of survival — one who didn’t always liberate, but who helped women make a way when there was no way.

[image error]Thus I am thrilled to share with Exponent readers excerpts of this interview that LDS writer Kurt Manwaring recently did with womanist Emilie M. Townes. Townes is a preeminent womanist ethicist who is now the Dean of Vanderbilt University Divinity School. I love the way she articulates her faith, her commitment to justice, and the importance of claiming our social locations.

Kurt Manwaring: What is your personal relationship with faith? Is there a certain portion of the bible you have found yourself referring back to over the years during times of great personal need?

Emilie Townes: Faith is what helps me get up each day and try one more time to get the gift of life that God has given me right by reaching out in grace and love to those around me and to live and work to help build the new heaven and new earth.

I often turn to the Old Testament/Hebrew Bible in time of great personal need— particularly the psalms of lament such as Psalm 22 or 137 because they help remind me that one must speak the truth of what is going wrong or troubling (lament) in order to reach God’s salvation in the midst of the suffering.

 

Kurt Manwaring: As a prominent theologian, do you feel you have a duty to comment on issues of morality in the political sphere? Is there a line somewhere delineating ethics and theology?

Emilie Townes: As a citizen of this country and as a woman of active faith, it is my responsibility to comment on issues of morality in the political sphere.

Ethics and theology are intimate dance partners — theology helps me think through how I experience God; ethics helps me think through how I must respond to this experience and also act on it.

 

Kurt Manaring: As you become increasingly more prominent, are there dangers associated with others oversimplifying what you bring to the table by referring to you as a ‘Black woman theologian’ or a ‘Black womanist ethicist’? Or are those demographic descriptions essential to understanding who you are and what you have to say?

Emilie Townes: Well, since I am a Black woman who uses womanist methodology as a social ethicist, the descriptions are apt.

What gives me pause is why we all don’t claim the social locations we come from when describing what we do so that we stop claiming false universals and instead recognize that we all begin our reflections from a particular place with a history that helps form us and what we see, think, and feel.

Where we come from is important and if we were more aware and honest about this and respected where others hail from as well, I think we’d have a much more humane society.

Kurt Manwaring: Mormons do not have a formal system of theology, and yet there are calls by scholars such as Terryl and Fiona Givens to develop one. What are some advantages Mormonism might see if it pursued such a course — and what are some of the dangers that would be associated with trying to systematize theology in a church so reliant upon inspiration?

Emilie Townes: Having a formal theology provides an explanation [of] why one is a Mormon from a faith perspective.

For instance, in my own Baptist faith, the concept of “soul freedom” that states that each one of us is responsible before God; and with that responsibility each of us is free, is intrinsic to being a Baptist — regardless of the many ways that those within the Baptist [faith] express themselves.

For me, one can have a theology and also rely on inspiration as the former can describe form and the latter function in how one responds to the Divine in our lives.

Kurt Manwaring: If you could magically make three books appear on the shelves of everyone in America (who would then read them), which books would you choose and why?

Bryan Stevenson, Justice Mercy: A Story of Justice and Redemption

Stevenson, a lawyer who has dedicated his life to defending death row prisoners gives pull back the harsh inequities in the American criminal justice system while showing us the power of mercy, justice, and hope.

James Cone, The Cross and the Lynching Tree

By turning to the powerful figures of the cross and lynching tree, Cone helps us understand the terror and hope that holds racism in place in our culture and our churches.

Kelly Brown Douglas, Stand Your Ground: Black Bodies and the Justice of God

Brown Douglas helps us understand the tragic consequences of the “stand-your-ground-culture” for not only black bodies, but all bodies in our culture.

Journeys of Faith: Portraits of LGBTQ Mormons

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Last Friday, I had the opportunity to go to the exhibition opening of Journeys of Faith: Portraits of LGBTQ Mormons, a collection of portraits by Seattle-based artist, Melinda Hannah.

The project is funded through a GoFundMe and has been displayed in various galleries in Provo and Seattle for the past year and a half and Hannah has added portraits to the collection during that time. There is hope that it’ll visit Utah again after its time in Berkeley, so even if you’ve seen it, there will be new portraits to see.

The opening of the exhibit was paired with a panel discussion with Hannah and some of the people whose portraits were displayed. When asked about why she wanted to do this series or portraits, Hannah responded, “What if I somehow reveal the beauty and dignity of all of us?”

The evening was really wonderful and warm. Panelists talked about coming out, balancing Mormonism with their identities, and their testimonies of Christ. You can watch the recording of the panel discussion here.

If you are interested in just portions of the discussion, here are the times/questions.

5:00 – introductions to the panelists

10:00 – “Can you speak briefly about what led you to create this artwork and how these 10:00 – portraits relate to your life and vocation as an artist?”

15:00 – “For many years LGBT people inside conservative religions like Mormonism were invisible and today that is changing. How does seeing portraits of many who like you, like us, are working to integrate their religion and their sexual orientation and gender identity affect you on your own personal faith journey?”

23:00 – “What message would you most want to convey to the suffering, confused, and silent LGBT Mormons who, of course still exist inside the religion?”

27:30 – “What is the state of your own testimony of Christ at this point in your faith journey and how has that changed over time?”

37:50 – Questions from the audience

It was really great to talk with some of the panelists, some who traveled states away to make it to the discussion. If you can see the exhibit in person, you really should. It would make a great visiting teaching or youth activity.

The exhibit will be at the Bade Museum at the Pacific School of Religion through May 31 in Berkeley, CA. It is open to the public on Mondays from 10am-2pm. You can also contribute to and follow the GoFundMe to get updates about where the exhibit will be next.

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Photo: Melinda Hannah

This #InternationalWomensDay, as we #PressForProgress, let’s acknowledge the progress already made by #Mormon feminists so far. Here’s an overview.

[image error]This recent feature in the Salt Lake Tribune provides an excellent overview of Mormon feminist victories over the last several decades. We have a long way to go, but let’s rejoice in what we have done so far:

Mormon church has taken ‘baby steps’ toward greater gender equity, but LDS feminists say it’s time to lengthen that stride

IWD Series 2018: You Are The Next Generation

Guest Post By Amelia Christensen

Amelia likes podcasts, ripping up gardens, and whale watching. She has two beautiful, curious, and emotional boys with her husband, and aspires to work in the mental health sector. Her heroines are Daria, Emma Smith, and Audrey Hepburn.

 

[image error]I remember her clearly. She sat on the floor in a pink party dress, her dark brown curls falling around laughing brown eyes.

The other girls in the class immediately flocked to her, and so it was, on my very first day of school, I already began to understand what popular looked like.

 

I don’t know what I was wearing; whatever it was must have been passed down through my sister. It was likely worn, and not particularly flashy. Neither of our parents worked, and anyone looking at me (until I was old enough for a job), knew it.

 

Boys didn’t notice or care what I wore, so they became my main source of friendship for many years.

 

Whether it was real or imagined, I didn’t feel like I fit in with the other girls. I was skinny and sickly, imaginative, and very odd. In fact, my first existential experience was only a few months into that school year.

 

If I went back to visit that little sprightly imp, I’m not sure she would believe that in the years following, she would grow a deep love for womanhood within herself, and the badass women around her. She would grow much more distrusting of men and aspire to be more than the conditioning that told her worth lay in being a mother and wife.

 

The process was slow, with one major requirement: exposure to other women. To all kinds of women, fictional and real.

 

I found myself in the principal, who sat in front of our class for special lessons. “What do you see in this painting?” she would say, holding up colourful specimens for us to dissect for a good hour at a time. “Retell the story of Helen of Troy in your own words,” she would request.

 

“Teasing that girl, and kissing those boys is unacceptable behaviour,” she would caution.

 

The odd, imaginative me wasn’t weird to her.

 

I found myself in Daria, the terrifically sarcastic realist. Like her, I saw beyond the surface level, constantly misunderstood as the misery chick, when I was actually a realist. She didn’t quite fit in, but she was cool in her own way, and did her own thing.

 

I found myself in the Croatian drama teacher with wild blond hair, who was the only female with the guts to tell me that I needed to do more with my life than become a Mother.

 

I found myself in Jane Eyre. As a child, she we as chided and despised for being passionate. I, likewise, was too loud and too opinionated, and I thought justice and fairness were far more important than keeping the peace. At some point, I crushed this all inside myself. I felt shame and hid my emotions.

 

Adult Jane eventually lets the strictness of Lowood unbind her spirit. She becomes fiery and forthright once more, only now passes into adulthood, a touch more bridled.

 

If she could speak up, be industrious, work hard, and get a life for herself, then so could I. We could both overcome obstacles and be more.

 

I continue to find myself in Rachel Hunt Steenblik, who inspired me to finally start studying, and who opened my heart and spirit to Heavenly Mother.

 

Without her, I wouldn’t be a Mormon feminist.

 

Coming to know myself as a Mormon feminist and progressive has required courage, the same courage required to be a woman in the #metoo movement. We are not believed, and modesty culture in the church is so often used as a weapon to slut shame women and take away the responsibility men have, to watch their own thoughts and actions.

 

I’ve realised my voice matters, and that I need to push back against this idea that any voice of change is a voice of apostasy.

 

How I wish to be like Emma Smith, the woman who stood before an apostle of the Lord to tell him the name leadership decided on for their womens relief organisation, was the wrong name. They listened, and the Relief Society came into being. I feel we are all Emma at times, scrubbing chewing tobacco from the floor, knowing that what is happening is not right.

Being a Mormon feminist and progressive has also required me to humbly recognise privilege in being white, western, married, and a mother.

 

It has required courage in pointing out these privileges to other women I care about, at the risk of alienating myself from them.

 

Harriet Tubman was the epitome of courage and compassion, the newest and one of the most important inspirations in my life.

 

Harriet, also known as the “Moses” of African American people, was born into slavery in Maryland, in the year 1822.

 

I grew up like a neglected weed – ignorant of liberty, having no experience of it.

-Harriet Tubman

 

 

I have had the privilege of finding myself; but imagine being born into a life where not only your whole family history and culture has been taken from you through years of slavery, but your whole purpose in life has been decided, and that purpose is to be somebody’s property.

Women like Harriet know intimately the depersonalisation that comes from patriarchal systems, only she experienced this both as a woman, and as an African American.

 

When Harriet eventually escaped slavery, she went back to help others. It wasn’t enough to be free herself. Thus, she became a vital person in the underground railroad movement.

 

I had crossed the line. I was free; but there was no one to welcome me to the land of freedom. I was a stranger in a strange land.

-Harriet Tubman

 

[image error]The Underground Railroad was a movement involving a network of both African American and white people, determined to see slaves through from captivity to freedom. This movement would provide shelter and escape to the north in the still of the night.

Group by group, she initiated over a dozen missions at great risk to her own life.

 

The Underground Railroad began in the 18th Century and continued through the American Civil War. During the war, Harriet took on roles such as cook, nurse, scout, and spy. She helped many freed slaves find work, and she joined with John Brown to recruit men for his raid on Harpers Ferry.

 

Harriet was a suffragette, a woman who wasn’t highly educated or large in stature, but who struck fear into the hearts of slave owners, and constantly furthered the cause of women and African Americans.

 

As women, we all come across incredible odds, perhaps not as extreme as Harriet Tubman, but personal to us as individuals, nevertheless. We are misunderstood, undervalued, explained to, paid less, objectified, and treated like fragile creatures.

 

On this day, International Women’s Day, I want you to remember you are the next generation in a long line of strong, powerful women. They paved the way, and we need to access their courage and continue to stomp the path.

Be not afraid. SHE is with you and will give you aid.

#PressforProgress

#MeToo

IWD Series 2018 Book Review: Seasons of Change

[image error]I am not sure what I was expecting when I began reading Seasons of Change. But somehow, having now read it, I feel like I have changed. Become wiser. Become happier. And found something that I didn’t know I was missing in my life.

 

The first essay, a piece by Teresa Hirst titled “Three Dollar Attribute” —pricked me. I felt something. It was like an unanticipated, humble, Christmas gift that made me smile because the giver clearly knew me well. I felt loved. “Coming Up For Air,” a poem by Melody Newey was so expressive that I swear I tasted saltwater on my tongue. Each essay or poem that followed had a similar, yet different, profound effect. I wept to myself as I read Catherine Keddington Arveseth’s essay “To Go Home” and made a mental note to remember to offer read it aloud in Relief Society sometime.  By the time I came to “When God Baked Pot Pie,” a poem by Terresa Wellborn, I had found my own reader’s rhythm. But this poem made me stop—so I told my husband to listen as I read it to him. But I didn’t make it through—I burst into tears well before the end as I felt my heart connected with God through the words she shared in her poem. Wellborn’s later contribution, “Yá’át’ééh”, rounds this literary pearl into the best collection of Mormon women’s writing that I have experienced in a long time.

 

The words of these women brought God to me through their words, in humble, rewarding —(sometimes bittersweet) offerings that celebrate women, womanhood, motherhood, sisterhood and friendship in all of its tangles and treasures.

 

Even the offerings that did not reflect my own life,– or at least not my life exactly, such as “Ebbing Tide” (Melissa Mcquarrie) and “Brownies and Bottled Peaches” (Jessie Christensen)—gently guided me into their lives, where I could sit, read and learn, leaving me with a satisfied spirit that I told myself again and again that I wanted to share with the friends in my life. Being honest, not all of the contributions sung to me. BUT each author spoke in her own voice, sharing a truth that meant something to her—and in a way that fed me a part of her life that I have not (yet?) tasted. So whilst some of the entries did not impact me personally, I know women who will be touched by them, because their story is different to mine. Thus, in complete truth I can say that each essay and poem is remarkable. Each and everyone deserves a shout-out.

 

 

I foolishly thought I would choose –perhaps a handful of contributions—to highlight. But nearly each one I read becomes my newest favourite: it’s like choosing your favourite child. You just can’t do it. You might prefer one child to join you in certain activities (my eldest for grocery shopping), and another child for a different event that suits you both best (my youngest to paint nails). But in the end, you love them—perhaps not equally, but completely. Each offering in this book is like that: each will remind you of yourself, or a friend—you will love them completely, and you want to savour the moment of your reading.

 

[image error]Michelle Lehnardt’s “My Inner Voice” made me want to be a better mother—and call my mother to thank her. Sandra Clark Jergensen’s “Open” made me feel at ease to discuss fertility, infertility, adoption and foster care, and Kellie Purcill’s “Blue Polish” brought a taste of Australia with a feast of  vivacious consciousness. At the end of Linda Hoffman Kimball’s Lessons from the Valley of the Shadow, I too cried “Dum vivimus vivamus!” (You’ll have to read the book to appreciate this—no spoilers from me!) And Melody Newey’s “I Tell My Children” spoke the words that haunted me when I was childless, and sustain me now that I have children. Then an added gift, Emily Clyde Curtis’ “Reviving a Doused Testimony” spoke with honesty and truth that enlightened me.

 

In summary, should you buy this book? Yes. And should you gift this book for International Women’s Day? (Yes) Or to celebrate the anniversary of the Relief Society? (Yes) Or for Mother’s Day? (Yes) Should you have a spare copy on hand when you forget a friend’s birthday? (Yes!) Would it be a great welcome gift to the new woman in your ward? (Yes.) Does it make a great addition and resource for Relief Society lessons? (Yes!)

 

I highly recommend this book and believe you will as well!

Seasons of Change: Stories of Transition from the Writers of Segullah