Helene Lerner's Blog, page 80

Declutter Your Life to Succeed Big

[image error]How often have you heard that de-cluttering your life creates space for new things to emerge? I believe there are even more benefits. Recently I decided to take personal organization to a new level with a process called 5S. I was introduced to this while working for General Mills. As your career and life continue to expand you may find you need to "get organized.” The 5S process may help you create and sustain new levels of productivity. Here’s a simplified way to 5S your life.

The first S stands for SORT. About 6 months ago I did this and got rid of no less than 3 large trash bags full of clothes. During the process I only kept clothes that fit well, looked nice, and were in good condition. Now dressing in the morning is a breeze. Organizing my office created a challenge because I felt like I needed everything. I decided to get rid of my someday pile. Either it’s worth reading or responding to today or it isn't. For me it’s just that simple. 

Next is SET order. When you were young you may have heard your mother say "a place for everything and everything is in its place." By creating integrated systems for things like email, calendaring and tasks, and creating a process for on-going self reflection and renewal, you may find your capacity and productivity both skyrocket.

The Third step is to SHINE. This is the process of cleaning things up and checking in and evaluating performance. It’s not enough for your desk to be clean. Take inventory of your skills and determine where you need to “shine” or hone an existing or new skill. 

The fourth s is for STANDARDIZE or STABILIZE. The standardization process is all about making things easy. You have a standard process for everything—how you read email, the way you pack for a business trip, whether you brush your teeth then wash your face or vice versa. Recognize and standardize the way you do things at work and at home. By creating a standard process, you can easily get someone up to speed when you get that much deserved promotion or take a vacation.

The final S is for Sustain. This is about renewal and continuous improvement. To achieve the level of success you are striving for in your career you will have to create a plan for your personal development and continuous improvement. To do this you have to be open to feedback about your brand and your performance. Seek out the opinions of those you trust and commit to acting on their feedback for your long-term success.

I would invite you to think about all the areas in your life and how you will "organize" them to enable your future and create the life and work you desire by design. Tweet me @corneliashipley and let me know how the process goes for you.

-Cornelia Shipley, Career Coach
www.corneliashipley.com

You Have a Personal Brand, Now What?

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My definition of a personal brand is simple: It is your reputation. Period. Your reputation is created based on three things—what you say, what you do, and what others say about what you said and did. The good news is you already have a personal brand. That said, most of us want to continue to expand our influence and impact. The best way for you to do that is by effectively managing your brand. To that end here are my 9 C's for maintaining your personal brand.

Get Centered
People with successful brands are focused! They have definite purpose personally and professionally. Their goals are clear and well defined. Clarify for yourself what you want in every area of your life and recognize that you may need to shift your brand positioning to ensure alignment between your message and your intent. What are you trying to accomplish and what position does your brand need to achieve your goals?

Clarify
Your brand message and image. Define what your brand stands for and what the "purchaser" can count on: leadership, integrity, trust, direct communication, etc. As your priorities change your message may need an update. What is do you want to be known for?

Contribute
Givers Gain. This popular saying has a lot of truth behind it. The more you contribute to your world and community the more you gain in return. Many times in giving to the world you gain additional visibility and credibility to accomplish your goals. Make sure you give strategically and in alignment with what matters most to you. What is the contribution you intend to give back to the world?

Connect
Networking is about more than exchanging business cards. It is about making a connection. The best way to do this is to connect what you do to the needs of your audience. Be ready to connect how your unique skills and abilities will aide your clients, customers, or employers in exceeding their expectations. Who needs to know what your brand has to offer and how will you meet them?

Community
No successful person does it alone. Creating a community of support and advocacy is critical. A personal board of advisors, establishing strong personal relationships with co-workers and industry colleagues, and having an appropriate personal support system will provide you with the foundation necessary to support you and your dreams. Who needs a seat at your executive board room table?

Be Confident
Confidence is built one step at a time. Start where you are with what you know. You have a unique talent or skill to bring tot he world. Hone your skills and expand your leadership capability. What do you need to do to increase your confidence?

Be Congruent
Make sure everything you do is in line with your brand image. Inconsistencies may cause your target market (employer/colleagues/etc.) to distrust you and your skills. Sometimes it is the little things that trip you up: Twitter, Facebook, Linkedin, Instagram, your email signature etc. Does your online presence match your desired brand image?

Be Consistent
A brand's reputation is created based on repeated experience. Make sure that every day you are meeting your personal standard of excellence and performance. Being described as dependable happens as a result of consistent performance over time, not a one time event. Are you meeting your personal standard of performance everyday?

Create Clout
"It is not what you know but who." Are you a person of influence? Can you cause people to listen and take action? Are you sought after for advice and perspective from key players in your office? If the answer to these questions is yes, you are well on your way to establishing the clout and influence necessary to achieve your career success.

-Cornelia Shipley, Career Coach
www.corneliashipley.com

10 Tips to Help You Fall Asleep

Sleep. We all need it, but sometimes we have a hard time getting it. Sleep is an extremely important time for our bodies to relax and rejuvenate, but what do you do when you want to rest but can't seem to fall into it? We asked our WomenWorking.com community for their best advice, and here are a few of their responses...

Tap into something greater

This can be a great way to breath, reflect, and clear your thoughts. Meditating before bed can also help lower your heart rate as you prepare for sleep.

Positivity trumps fear

Negativity can weigh heavily on a person's mood. Having a positive mindset before bed can help you get rid of worry so you can fall asleep happy.

Lay next to someone who makes you feel safe

It's important to feel safe in your home. Sometimes just knowing that the person beside you will protect you is enough to put your mind at ease. If no one is there—a cuddly stuffed animal or pillow can do the trick.

Disconnect

Bright cell phone screens can be distracting and can trigger your brain into waking up. Put your technology to the side and allow yourself to disconnect until the morning.

Blackout curtains

If there are bright street lights outside your window, it can be hard to fall asleep. Blackout curtains keep the light from shining in.

Calming drinks

Almost any herbal tea will help do the trick. Try chamomile or lemon verbena. 

Soothing sounds

Babies are sung lullabies to help them fall asleep, but this can work at any stage in life. Music can be very calming and some find it soothing to listen to before falling asleep.

Restful reads

It doesn't have to be a book—try a magazine or the newspaper. Reading before bed allows the mind to focus and think without the distraction of technology.

Pen your thoughts

Journaling is a positive way to get your thoughts out before bed so they aren’t keeping you up at night. Try writing your thoughts down before going to bed.

Forgiveness: you can begin again tomorrow

Remember that if you are feeling down about something, tomorrow is a new day. There will be a new beginning, so don't stress all night over something that can be repaired tomorrow.

Compiled by WomenWorking.com Intern,  Allison Perrine.

When Should You Give Feedback?

[image error]We have all been in that situation, the one where you know a colleague left a “ bad taste” in a clients mouth, or you “ heard” about a presentation that went wrong. When we get feedback about a colleague it can be hard to determine when and if we should share it. Feedback (not Wheaties) is the breakfast of champions - it is the one thing guaranteed to help people grow and develop when given well.

Here are some questions to ask yourself as you consider when to provide feedback and how. They will allow you to invest in others and protect your reputation in the process.

Is it designed to move the person forward? Feedback is a gift to the receiver when there is no hidden agenda and you are invested in the person getting better. Period. If this is not the case, your feedback may fall on deaf ears and you may be perceived as inauthentic. To help the person move forward you have to be specific in the feedback. If you don’t know or have the details, this can be challenging. Make sure you get the facts and are clear about what needs to be different in the future BEFORE you give the feedback.

Will they hear you? Do you have credibility with the person, and is your relationship one where the person will actually listen to your feedback? If no is your answer, then you may not be heard.  You have to have equity (or in Steven Covey terms a positive bank balance) with the person to ensure they will hear you. You also need to make sure you are sharing the feedback in a safe space (preferably in private) and that you have plenty of time for the person to ask questions and process what you are sharing.

What are the ramifications if they don't hear you? In the event that you give feedback and it is not heard, what is at risk for you and for the person you are providing the feedback to? Be prepared to share what is at risk for the person receiving the feedback. If you are putting your career at risk by providing feedback to someone with influence or authority over you, be very careful about the timing of the feedback and how you position it so that your personal reputation is not damaged. 

How would you want to receive the feedback? I have clients who have given feedback about everything from body odor to poor professional performance and the old adage rings true, "It is not what you say but how you say it." Saying the tough stuff with grace and compassion can be critical to others receiving your gift and making positive change. Consider your message and package it in a way it can be easily received. If you know you are giving a message that may be hard to hear - say so, it will often make the listener more open to hearing what you have to say.

What is the opportunity for you? This may sound like a funny question, but I believe it is the most important. What can you learn about yourself based on what you are noticing about the other person. More often than not the negative things we dislike about another reside somewhere within us. Be willing to reflect on the message they may exist for you in what is making you uncomfortable. What is your colleague, friend, or bosses behavior triggering for you?  Where is your opportunity to grow and transform who you are being in the world?

As you consider providing feedback to those who you do not manage or supervise, I would invite you to ask yourself these questions and let the answers guide the way in which you give feedback to others.

-Cornelia Shipley, Career Coach
www.corneliashipley.com

Don't Sweat the Small Stuff

Try this “sixty-second inventory” during the day to help you identify  how you’re feeling and irritations that may be bothering you. Here’s what you do—pause several times during the day for a reality check, and ask yourself:

What am I feeling?

Actually pinpoint the feeling, such as being angry with your boss for not acknowledging the overtime hours you’ve put in lately, or being jealous of a friend who always seems to carve out time for a vacation when you can’t. If you have trouble identifying your feelings, call a friend and share what’s happening. She may be able to help. 

How am I holding on?

You’ve identified what’s bothering you, and maybe it’s appropriate to take an action, like telling your friend, “I’m disappointed that you forgot about my dinner party.” But once you do this, let it go. Look at the consequences if you don’t—it drains your energy so that you can’t create what you truly want for yourself. 

What am I grateful for in this moment?

To complete the letting-go process, reflect on what you have to be grateful for, right now. If you can’t think of anything, reflect on the things that you take for granted, such as a roof over your head or food in your refrigerator. Act as if there are a lot of things. (You know what will happen? That will become true for you.)

Adapted from Time for Me: Simple Pleasures for Women Who Do Too Much, by Helene Lerner, Simple Truths, 2015.

Dare To Live Fully: Intuition as a Business Edge

In this episode, Helene's guest is Denise Sena, a Project Leader at Merck. Growing up, Denise’s father pointed out how perceptive she was. She has developed her intuition and uses it to make important decisions. 

Check out some of the highlights of the program here:

On why women aren't using their intuition more in business...

Denise: It has a lot to do with the confidence women bring to the table. Most women believe their level of experience fuels their intuition. That's the case sometimes. But your intuition is your value system, your upbringing, and it's your moral compass. Women need to feel confident that they can listen to their inner voice.

On prioritizing...

Helene: Women are so often the givers. We give to our families, we give at work, we give to the community, but very often we relegate putting ourselves and our careers to the middle of the list. I think it's very important for women to upgrade themselves on their lists.

On listening your intuition...

Denise: It's really getting that mind, body, spirit connection and slowing down and listening to your inner voice. 

SUBSCRIBE TO OUR ITUNES PODCAST, DARE TO LIVE FULLY, TO STAY UP TO DATE WITH THE LATEST EPISODES!

How to Professionally Handle a Personal Crisis

[image error]I know for sure that at some point in your career you will experience a personal crisis. It could be anything from the loss of a loved one, a medical crisis, or a divorce. My crisis came just 5 days after my wedding when my mother unexpectedly passed away. I know from firsthand experience that the best way to get through a crisis is to have a plan. Here are some things to consider as you manage your career and life during times of personal challenge: 

Do your job or take time off.

During a time of crisis you may not be able to focus effectively on work. If that is the case, be willing to take FMLA (Family Medical Leave Act), personal leave, or vacation time to deal with whatever is going on. If you decide in the midst of the crisis to continue working, then you need to do your job and do it well. It may not be fair, but your colleagues will be evaluating how you handle yourself during this challenging time so make sure you maintain your peak level of performance.

Clarify what you need and ask for it.

Often during a crisis we forget that there are others around who can support us. But we have to tell them HOW they can help. For me, that meant everything from asking for space to having people send the acknowledgements on behalf of the family. You may need time off from work, someone to watch the kids, or bring a home cooked meal. Whatever you need, be willing to ask for it. Many companies have a ton of benefits to support employees during times of crisis, so make sure you fully leverage your benefits by asking what your situation qualifies for.

Decide on the details you will share.

Everyone does not need to know all the details of your personal crisis. Before sharing any details at work, decide what details you will share and with whom. You also want to decide how you will answer questions like: What Happened? Are you ok? Is there anything I can do? The more you rehearse your answers the less likely you will break down. Be prepared for the unexpected response when you do share. Your situation will have an impact on your colleagues and they may respond in a variety of ways and share things you did not know. Be prepared to hear about circumstances similar to your own that your colleagues have faced in the past.

Take care of yourself and set boundaries

If you have not been on a great self-care plan, now is the time to start. There are three things you can do immediately to start taking care of yourself: Eat right, exercise, get plenty of rest. Just doing those three things will help you have the energy you need to get through days ahead. As part of your self-care plan you will need to set strong boundaries. If you have to deal with your personal crisis at work, do so privately so your colleagues don’t over hear. Make sure when you get triggered or upset that you find an outlet outside of work you can call on to process your emotions. Your colleagues have their own challenges and may not have capacity to listen to your ongoing issue.

Doing these 4 things will help you to maintain your professional reputation while handling the personal crisis in your life.

-Cornelia Shipley, Career Coach
www.corneliashipley.com

Is It Time to Move on to a New Job?

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A few months ago I shared with womenworking.com the 3 questions to ask when evaluating a promotion opportunity. They were:

Does it give you additional exposure?

Can it help you enhance core skills like strategic planning?

Does the opportunity support your personal career objectives?

Now that the job market in some sectors like health care and technology are beginning to do significant recruiting, you may be asking yourself: Is it time for me to make a move? In addition to the questions above, there are a few other things to consider before you make the leap to what may appear to be “greener pastures.”

Does it position you for long-term success?

When making a move from one company to another, you want to take the long view. Remember your career is a marathon, not a sprint, so you want to make sure that the new role is setting you up for long term success. Ideally the job is a promotion in title, scope of work, and pay. If you are taking a lateral move (doing the same job for a new company) make sure you that you are moving to a more prestigious company with greater exposure and that the role offers significantly higher complexity.

Is it aligned with the legacy you want to leave?

World-renowned coach Marshall Goldsmith often shares that there are 3 things people are looking for: meaning, contribution, and joy. Many of us find meaning and contribution in the work we do and the legacy we are able to leave. As you consider new opportunities, make sure that the legacy you want to leave is possible. Do you want to be known as a change agent or innovator? Make sure the company has the opportunity for you to leave your mark on the organization.

How is the company culture?

It is not enough to read the recruiting brochure. You need to make sure that the company’s culture will meet your needs. Does the organization share your values? Do you see women like you in leadership positions you aspire to? Are people in the organization succeeding using the work/life balance programs you want to take advantage of? Are women advancing at the rate you aspire to move? These are just a few of the questions you will want answers to before you say yes to that new opportunity.

Take some time to reflect on these questions as you consider changing organizations. Remember to take the long view of your career as you plan for future roles.

-Cornelia Shipley, Career Coach
www.corneliashipley.com

Start Dressing Like a Boss

Although the struggle for equality and fair pay is still ongoing, women ARE making strides in the workplace. With all we master as executives, entrepreneurs, and for some of us, mothers, many women still deal with a real challenge when it comes to their image. Choosing what to wear to meetings, business dinners, or to the office day-to-day is a task and project of its own. 

The definition of a boss is a leader who completes an action with authority and finesse. Yet when it comes to looks “she” often makes a lot of mistakes. From dressing too casually to not giving attention to proper fit. Most executive women win awards and honors for their achievements in business, however none ever make it onto a best-dressed list. “She” certainly could if she applied the same confidence she has in her work to how she looks while at work. 

Whether your office is casual and creative or buttoned-up and sophisticated, every women should get inspired to raise the stakes on her executive boss style. It’s too often overlooked. A quality presentation of yourself is an important component of the direction your professional life goes. Remember first impressions! Remember that people are sizing you up from the door before you EVER get a chance to say a word. Appearances are vital!

How to look smart and polished for work: Boss Bylaws 101

Pantsuits: Pantsuits are the staple in chic and modern work wear. You don’t have to channel your masculine side in order to be taken seriously and respected, however, the mixing of masculine styles with a dash of femininity is definitely a hot trend. Beauty in the structural or textural details can make all the difference to mastering menswear inspired classics. Accessories are an important element that can elevate and set your pantsuit look apart. When wearing a pant suit, there are a few key style tricks you can use to give off that Boss Look fabulous appeal. Be ready to be respected AND awed at the same time with this style.

  

Metallic accessories shows you’re a risk taker and confident. I love metallic shoes with classic colors suits.

Brightly colored or Stylish Handbags can lift the traditional colors in suiting to give a fresh and new lift to an otherwise ordinary look.

Colored Suits: whether you go racer red or soft and feminine with pastels, breaking out of the regular 3B’s (Blue-Black-Beige) is a Smart Style Savvy decision. Not only will you make heads turn, but you’ll showoff your aptitude to step out of the box and take risks… that pay off! Boss moves!

Pamela Watson is an experienced stylist who currently works as the trend expert for Builders of Style, where she prepares A-list clients for red carpet events, music videos, concerts and award shows. Check our her fashion blog here. Have a question for Pamela? Ask below!

Attracting and Building Sponsor Relationships

This is the fifth part of my discussion with Samantha Saperstein, Chief Marketing Officer for Commercial Banking, JPMorgan Chase.

We discuss attracting and building sponsor relationships, and what they mean for your own growth. 

Watch part one HERE, and subscribe to our YouTube channel for future videos.