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12 Ways to Maintain the Christmas Spirit AFTER Christmas (8)

In 2017, I spent the year maintaining the Christmas spirit in different ways each week. I thought I would re-post this journey because we’re living in some weird-ass times, and I’m beginning to believe that, now more than ever, we will need to depend on ourselves and whatever sense of community we have left. What follows was written in a time when we still kinda believed in institutions and systems, but that is slowly crumbling. I’m revising this while waiting to hear about the guy who murdered the UnitedHealthCare CEO. It was also written when a hurricane was in infrequent natural disaster. Now, we’re having several in one season. I guess I’m saying to take these ideas with grains of salt. You may be better off just recognizing someone you know who is in need by sending them money.

There’s a lot going on in the world. Natural disasters bring death, destruction, renewal, and rebuilding. Additionally, “regular” life is going on and many times that also requires help. So, for September, I donated and I donated, and I donated.

I donated to the American Red Cross through a shoe store, called DSW. All you had to do was stop by a store and literally swipe your card. This was easy enough. However, afterwards I read that the American Red Cross isn’t trustworthy. Well, what’s done is done. I do hope that’s not true.Firehouse ran a campaign for Hurricane Harvey victims. All you had to do was round up your bill to the nearest dollar. This also seemed like a simple way to give, so I rounded my meal’s receipt to support.A friend of mine participated in a suicide prevention run. Consequently, I supported her by giving money to the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention.My daughter’s friend’s birthday was September 20th. In addition to planning a huge surprise Sweet 16 Birthday party, her mother also wanted to buy her a car. She used a crowdfunding tool to raise money for this gift. While I don’t usually participate in GoFundMes and such, our family is pretty close to her, so I gave a few dollars for her cause.A friend of mine from high school also created and promoted a feed the homeless day in my home city, Chicago. She calls them “blessing bags.” They are the same concept that I did a few months back. While I had planned on actually sending toiletries, etc., I failed to plan how to execute it by the September 30th deadline. So, I gave money for You Matter Outreach Day (Feed the Homeless).

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12 Ways to Maintain the Christmas Spirit AFTER Christmas (7)

In 2017, I spent the year maintaining the Christmas spirit in different ways each week. I thought I would re-post this journey because we’re living in some weird-ass times, and I’m beginning to believe that, now more than ever, we will need to depend on ourselves and whatever sense of community we have left.

For August, I paid it forward. In case you’re unfamiliar with this concept, the idea is instead of paying someone back for a good deed, you pay it forward by doing something nice for someone else. For example, during one of this summer’s vacations, our friends paid for all of our meals and museum exhibits. Instead of paying them back, we would just pay it forward by doing something for someone else. Typically, people associate this with literally paying for something for someone. So, that’s where I began.

I learned a few years ago that strangers tend not to accept face-to-face help. When I tried to pay for a guy’s groceries, he vehemently declined. This time around, I simply paid for the person behind me in the Starbucks line. It was done and I could zoom off before the driver knew what happened.

But paying it forward in that way seemed cliche. So the following week, I was more in tune with my surroundings and looked for ways to pay it forward without money. I suppose it’s just called helping someone. This worked out perfectly. Instead of ignoring the bewildered lady who’d never signed into the library’s computer, I stood beside her and patiently explained how to log in and find her name. Someone once had to do this for me, too.

I continued paying it forward by holding the door for a lady at yoga. I’d noticed some time ago that people are all Namaste while they’re in yoga, but will let that door slam in your face when it’s over. Instead of silently complaining, I decided to be the change I wanted to see. Another opportunity presented itself the following week. A lady in my Bodyworks class was running late, so I helped her set up her space by getting her dumbbells for her.

“Thank you so much! I was finishing my quinoa and fruit in the car,” she said.

Then, you know what happened? I was running late the next week, and she didn’t hesitate to help me set up so I could begin on time.

This month, I also participated in our citywide “Stuff the Bus” back-to-school campaign. I normally don’t do this because we have our own children’s school supply needs to fulfill, but again, there was that one year D and I needed a little extra help for our own daughters. Instead of paying that person back, I gave freely to support the children in my community.

So far, this month is my favorite way to maintain the Christmas spirit after Christmas because paying it forward really is just about being present and giving of oneself in ways that someone once gave to you.

Maybe you can pay it forward to return a good deed, or just to be nice in the moment.

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12 Ways to Maintain the Christmas Spirit AFTER Christmas (6)

In 2017, I spent the year maintaining the Christmas spirit in different ways each week. I thought I would re-post this journey because we’re living in some weird-ass times, and I’m beginning to believe that, now more than ever, we will need to depend on ourselves and whatever sense of community we have left.

Again, I’d forgotten to maintain the Christmas spirit after Christmas. I’ve decided to still post what happened because I always want people to realize I am an actual flawed human being, which given the advent of artificial intelligence seems like an important reminder.

So for this blog, I invite you to read the comments where others have made suggestions if you want to practice this, oooorrr add a comment and let us know how you give back throughout the year!

Soooo…one day I looked up at it was July 25th aaannnd I hadn’t maintained the Christmas Spirit for that month! Turns out the summer is the time when I’m most forgetful about these things cause I’m out frolicking and stuff.

 

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12 Ways to Maintain the Christmas Spirit AFTER Christmas (5)

In 2017, I spent the year maintaining the Christmas spirit in different ways each week. I thought I would re-post this journey because we’re living in some weird-ass times, and I’m beginning to believe that, now more than ever, we will need to depend on ourselves and whatever sense of community we have left.

Because I’m human, by June 2017, I’d forgotten to formally give in some systematic way. However, I’m happy to report that I was still service-minded…it was just more natural.

My goddaughter and I traveled to Nashville the second week in June. There, we hung out on Broad Street with a friend of mine who we’d visited. I’d noticed the homeless population almost immediately and the busyness of the area allowed me to take some candid shots. Well, one man wouldn’t let me take a photo, unless I gave him some money. How much was up to me. I paid $2.00 for a shot of his sign. This, however, isn’t it lol I must’ve deleted it. But this is representative of the types of signs we saw that day.

A couple days later, we rented a car and drove to Memphis to visit my cousin. Here, people party on the infamous Beale Street. The evening wore into morning and clubs began to close. People began to filter back into the street. This is when I met a guy in a wheelchair. He explained to me that it cost $7.00 to enter one of the Memphis shelters. He had one dollar, so I gave him six more. And just as I’ve written before, I didn’t worry about if he actually used the money for housing; that’s none of my business.

Later that morning, my cousin had a breakdown where she revealed her disappointment in our relationship. She’d been suppressing these feelings for a few years. From what I could tell, she wanted more of my money, time, and affection, seemingly in that order. A former part of me would have dug deep and matched her hurt feelings with my own. But I’ve lived long enough to know that doesn’t help. Instead, I hugged her and listened. Later that day, I maintained my own silence and thoughts. Don’t get me wrong. I was mad; however, I chose not to allow my anger to drown out her opinion. Furthermore, when we went to lunch, I also chose to pay for her meal as an act of kindness.

The lesson I learned for Christmas in June is that sometimes it’s good to just go with the flow and give when necessary or as you can. Additionally, I’ve learned to give without worry. Many times I’ve not wanted to give to the homeless because I might need that $2 or I don’t want to pay for someone’s food because I’ve already paid for the last five meals when we were together. But in a way, that’s the opposite of an abundant mindset. Giving this year has shown me that I always have enough. I have so much that I can give time, money and resources freely without stress. Isn’t that a wonderful thought?

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12 Ways to Maintain the Christmas Spirit AFTER Christmas (4)

In 2017, I spent the year maintaining the Christmas spirit in different ways each month. I thought I would re-post this journey because we’re living in some weird-ass times, and I’m beginning to believe that, now more than ever, we will need to depend on ourselves and whatever sense of community we have established. This one is special, too, because our new administration has proposed dismantling the Federal Department of Education. Now more than ever, it is imperative that we care about how our children will be educated. It can’t all be left to an individual state government. Remember, how children are educated impacts everyone in the future.

For the fourth service project in 2017, I decided to do something near and dear to my heart, tutor elementary school children. Can you believe it took me two months to find a place to actually volunteer? YReads, associated with the YMCA is the name of the program I chose. After I found a program, it took a full three months (or so) for me to be approved. I’d forgotten that working with children requires a million and one items: application, resume, three references, a webinar about not molesting children, and a background check. Sheesh! This is why I didn’t begin until April.

During April and May, I tutored children in reading. But, these aren’t just any children. Have you heard the term ESL? If not, it stands for English as a second language. These children attend one of Jacksonville’s designated ESL schools. I typically had the same two students at the beginning of the hour. One from the Democratic Republic of the Congo, and the second half hour, students who were Hispanic, mostly from Mexico.

My time with these children was hopeful. Little kids are resilient and motivated in a multitude of ways. For example, the Congolese girl moved to the States two years ago. English is one of four languages she speaks.

“Where you from?” she asked on day one.

“I live here in Jacksonville, like you,” I responded.

“Noooo. Where you from???”

She’s so perceptive. Guess she’d wondered, as others have asked before, you not from ‘round here, huh? I ended up telling her that I was born and raised in Chicago and her eyes brightened. From that day forward, I knew Maya and I had bonded.

Week three she thought I wasn’t coming, and when I walked in the door, her face lit up.

“You’re heeeere!” she exclaimed.

“Of course Maya! I’ve been looking all over for you. I thought you weren’t here,” I put on.

I love children of all ages. It’s one of three things with which I have a natural ability. Therefore, tutoring for one hour a week wasn’t strenuous. And although I don’t know for sure what the impact will be, I suspect I’ve positively influenced Maya’s life in some way just by being there.

YReads is a state of Florida initiative; however, I’m sure your city and state has a similar tutoring program designed to support children’s literacy. Tutoring is a way to give back to your own community that is sure to yield high returns.

*Maya is a pseudonym.

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12 Ways to Maintain the Christmas Spirit AFTER Christmas (3)

In 2017, I spent the year maintaining the Christmas spirit in different ways each month. I thought I would re-post this journey because we’re living in some weird-ass times, and I’m beginning to believe that, now more than ever, we will need to depend on ourselves and whatever sense of community we have established. This third way is especially important because as over the years, there have been several new Florida laws passed against panhandling. Read them here: The Many Laws of Florida’s Panhandling.

This next idea was a combination of a failed attempt to volunteer at a food pantry and something I’d seen other people do on social media. In February, I thought I was going to hand out food with United Community Outreach Ministry (UCOM). Instead, the director asked me to clean the toiletry section for an hour and a half. Although I saw the indirect benefit of helping her because she probably didn’t have time, I couldn’t see myself continuing to do this for three more weeks.

“I could do this myself, in my own way, I thought.”

That’s just what I did. So, in March of 2017, I passed out goodie bags to transient people. I packed four 1-gallon Ziplock bags with deodorant, wipes, Vaseline, fresh fruit, granola bars, water, and five $1 bills. The first week, I started with the guy I see sleeping under I95. He mumbled something to me that I didn’t quite understand. The second week, I traveled downtown to where I know a group of the same population hangs out. Before I could make it there, a guy stopped me.

“Can I have that orange?” he asked

I gave him the entire bag. He seemed genuinely pleased, and even more excited when I told him there was money in there.

The third week, I was battling allergies and busy with book stuff, so my husband gave a bag to an elderly gentleman with a cane.

I had planned to hand out the final bag on my way to Gainesville. For the past two years, I’ve noticed a small population of men who alternate holding a sign at the Baldwin exit off I10. This time I tracked a guy as he crossed the street to nearby trees. I parked my car, walked over to the men who were seated around a makeshift living area, and handed the bag to the bearded man nearest the fence that separated us.

“God Bless you hun.” He said it twice.

“You too,” I replied.

With this one, I’ve learned that the homeless population is invisible, until you open your eyes and look for them. Then, they’re right in front of your face, begging to be seen.

Maybe, you could pack a goodie bag for the transient population in your city.

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12 Ways to Maintain the Christmas Spirit AFTER Christmas (3)12 Ways to Maintain the Christmas Spirit AFTER Christmas (2)12 Ways to Maintain the Christmas Spirit AFTER Christmas: (1)Monday Notes: 4 Things I Liked About Jingle Jangle: A Christmas JourneyWriter’s Workshop: Wanna Take a Class With Me?

12 Ways to Maintain the Christmas Spirit AFTER Christmas (2)

In 2017, I spent the year maintaining the Christmas spirit in different ways each week. I thought I would re-post this journey because we’re living in some weird-ass times, and I’m beginning to believe that, now more than ever, we will need to depend on ourselves and whatever sense of community we have left.

In February of 2017, I did sent people gifts. I began with my little sister friend’s birthday. I ordered Wandas from Two Dough Girls and had them delivered to her home. I also sent my little cousin a care package. She was completing her first year at my alma mater, Western Michigan University. I asked her what she wanted/needed and she sent me a list. My husband and I added her requests to our groceries and shipped them off. If you’ve ever been away from home, then you understand how exciting it is to receive free snacks and toiletries. Her older sister didn’t need anything, so I sent her a handwritten card with well-wishes and a copy of one of my books.

This seems to not only be a simple way to show people that you’re thinking of them, but also to create connection.

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12 Ways to Maintain the Christmas Spirit AFTER Christmas (2)12 Ways to Maintain the Christmas Spirit AFTER Christmas: (1)Monday Notes: 4 Things I Liked About Jingle Jangle: A Christmas JourneyWriter’s Workshop: Wanna Take a Class With Me?Monday Notes: Learning to Be My Authentic Self

12 Ways to Maintain the Christmas Spirit AFTER Christmas: (1)

In 2017, I spent the year maintaining the Christmas spirit in different ways each week. I thought I would re-post this journey because we’re living in some weird-ass times, and I’m beginning to believe that, now more than ever, we will need to depend on ourselves and whatever sense of community we have left.

Here is a reflection of the first way in case you want to do something similar for 2024.

January 2017, I served the homeless. I chose to volunteer at the Clara White Mission here in Jacksonville. The shelter is named after a Black American who was enslaved on Amelia Island. Her daughter, Eartha became an entertainer and philanthropist, who cared about the poor and disenfranchised. Consequently, she founded the mission and named it after her mother.

Once a week for a couple of hours, I awoke from my usual slumber to literally bring plates of freshly cooked meals to patrons. Interacting with people of varied walks of life humbled me. Providing my time, instead of simply handing someone a dollar yielded a different type of energy.

Volunteering here is pretty simple. If you’re in the area, here’s the information. If not, then I’d encourage you to find a shelter/mission in your city.

People say that Christmas isn’t about giving and receiving gifts, but I can’t tell. It seems to be the part that everyone enjoys. And if you suggest removing it, then entire social media arguments ensue. I once read someone justify Christmas gifts with the story of the Three Wise Men.

I digress.

Today, I encourage you to locate a shelter or mission and serve for at least one hour per week. I promise you won’t regret it.

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12 Ways to Maintain the Christmas Spirit AFTER Christmas: (1)Monday Notes: 4 Things I Liked About Jingle Jangle: A Christmas JourneyWriter’s Workshop: Wanna Take a Class With Me?Monday Notes: Learning to Be My Authentic SelfMonday Notes: How Being an Adoptee Taught Me to Lie

Monday Notes: 4 Things I Liked About Jingle Jangle: A Christmas Journey

A few weeks ago, three friends reached out to me to ask if I’d watched Jingle Jangle: A Christmas Journey yet. I love Christmas movies and didn’t even know it was a thing, so I was super excited to run home and watch it as soon as I could. Here are four things I liked about the movie.

The cast is Black. Representation in media is important. I came of age in the ‘80s. At the time, the only Christmas film I had that included people who looked me was The Wiz with Michael Jackson and Diana Ross, and even that was an adaptation of The Wizard of Oz. As I grew older, I enjoyed watching Christmas movies…a lot, but there still weren’t many that included an all-Black cast. As of today, there are about eleven, including some fan favs, like The Preacher’s Wife, The Best Man Holiday, and Almost Christmas. So, I’m quite pleased to add another all-Black Christmas movie to the list.

There is a dysfunctional father-daughter theme. Most of you know I’ve edited and contributed to a book called Daddy: Reflections of Father-Daughter Relationships, so I was super happy to see this movie normalizes that theme, while not blaming the father or the daughter for the dysfunction. There was one part, in particular, with which I could relate. The narrator says, “Jessica didn’t just lose one parent, she lost two.” That’s exactly how I felt when my mother died and I think this film did a great job of demonstrating how dysfunction occurs, without centralizing the issue or overexaggerating events.

Jeronicus Jangle is a Black male professor. I’m a professor who has worked fulltime at three different institutions. I have encountered two Black male professors in each department. I’ve also graduated from three different universities in three different cities and have studied under three Black male professors in the English and education field. There aren’t a lot of professors who fit the demographic. I’m not sure what the statistic is for math and science, which is what Jangle’s character was, but I’m willing to bet it’s low. Kind of like having an all-Black cast, this type of representation matters, too.

The songs are inspiring and uplifting. I’m glad no one told me Jingle Jangle was a musical, because I probably wouldn’t have watched it. I absolutely loathe musicals. There’s something about people breaking out into song and dance in the middle of a script that’s uber annoying. But, as I prepared to write this blog post, I re-watched the movie and really listened to the songs. Each one is very motivational. My favorite is sung by Journey (Madalen Mills), Jangle’s granddaughter; it’s called, “Square Root of Possible.” And the chorus is,

It’s so possible
Watch me rise high above my obstacles
Watch me become who I’m supposed to be
Oh, the possibilities
‘Cause the squarе root of impossible
Is possible
In me
In mе

I mean, really. How much more inspiring can you get than this song???

Have you watched Jingle Jangle: A Christmas Journey? If so, let me know what you liked about it in the comments. If not, I suggest checking it out on Netflix. In the midst of a pandemic, it’s nice to have a new sunshiny movie to watch.

Written November 20, 2020

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