Kaia > Recent Status Updates

If Jace turns out to be Stephen's son, I might scream. I really might.

For a second there I thought Clary was going to save her own damn self for once. Silly me.

You know, for a book that's marketed to teenage girls, and has so many teenage girls in it, there seems to be a lack of useful female characters. Shit hits the fan, and all Isabelle, Clary and Maia seem to be able to is cry about it.

"The sun was burning down beyond the horizon now, flooding the sky with blood and roses [...]" Dear God: This year's plague is a bit strange. We're not entirely sure what this means in regards to our sins or how to rectify them. Please send clarification--a rain of toads, perhaps? Love, New York.

"Because," Simon said, "you're obviously psychotic." Can we stop with the "insane" villain trope? Because the actual statistics show that people with mental illnesses are more likely to be the victims of crime than the perpetrators. Also please just fucking stop, I'm tired of people like me being stigmatized and demonized.

And there's Jace's super speshul power. I mean, aside from Epic Douchyness.

"What I actually wanted to call you is a hell of a lot more unprintable than your name," she snapped." Okay, seriously though, why does Clare keep mentioning "unprintable" words in a goddamn book? A book that is neither humor, nor in first person? It makes no sense.

Do any of the teenagers in this book have like, school? Why isn't Simon worried about what he's going to do when school starts again? Or does it just...not? I'm confused.

"She wanted to run, but her legs felt like bags of water." Gosh, that sounds so familiar. It's almost like it's exactly the same as it was in the first book...

Jace is 17, not "still just a child." It's one thing to make mistakes, but this is purposefully stupid behavior to create drama and angst, and there's no excuse. Jace is responsible here, and acting like it's everyone's fault but his own is bullshit.

So Clary has a super speshul power that nobody else has. Why am I not surprised?

No, really, do American teenagers drink this much coffee? I know I was one once, but I don't remember this.

Jace, you are a fucking idiot.

Oh come on, Jace, you can't really be swallowing this, can you? If Valentine's real goal was to protect the world from demons, he just admitted that he could make them destroy themselves right now. Even you can't be that stupid.

"Surprise passed over Valentine's face like a hand smoothing away all expression."

"She raised the witchlight in her hand, its glow raying out between her fingers like the light of a tiny sun." I'm pretty sure she used that exact description in the first book. Copy pasta isn't writing!

That is not flirting, Simon, that is a boy threatening a girl with abuse!

Simon/Maia. The only ship I've ever had that sank in drydock, before it ever got a chance to launch.

Would someone check my back for llama hoof prints? They just keep coming.

"He didn't even really look like Valentine." Even if I didn't already know that Jace and Clary weren't actually related, this ham-fisted foreshadowing would show it coming a mile away. It's obvious who Clary is meant to be with. This siblings thing is such a farce.

All that squishing and thudding you hear? Yeah, that's me being trampled by drama llamas.

"[...] and white-gold wings sprouted from his back, wider and more thickly feather than any bird's." But...but birds are feathered the way they are for a purpose, not just to look pretty. They've evolved their feathers for flight, most of them, and...oh god, why do I bother? Seriously, why? Also, Clare illuminates why most authors (and I include myself) should rarely write dream sequences.

My god, that chapter was interminable. And I feel like I've been run over by an entire herd of stampeding drama llamas.

A "perfectly booted heel"? What does that mean? I mean, I know what I consider a perfect pair of boots, but somehow I doubt a male guard of the Seelie Court would share my opinion on the matter.

"Isabelle's smile was like a whispered secret." Could you not?

Omigod she actually made me laugh! And it only took somewhere in the vicinity of 600 pages! (And by laugh I mean not at something she meant me to take seriously.)

Oh Magnus, you glorious, glorious troll. I <3 you.

"Then she closed it, her lips tightening into a thin white line, like a slash drawn in chalk across her face." Even when her similes aren't completely awful, they're superfluous. She sticks them all over the place, where they're not needed. Also that's like the third time in roughly 100 pages that Maryse has made that expression. Miracle her face ain't stuck that way.