Jeremy Maddux > Recent Status Updates

This is better than its premise had any right to be. My hat is off to Goodman for taking an absurd concept and absolutely running to the home plate with it. Really great story so far.

'Anyway I went through the motions, showing him how to pick locks. He was impatient and heavy-handed and couldn't get it right. Not to be rude, but picking a lock is not dissimilar to seducing a woman. Patience, a delicate, sensitive touch and... voila, the lock opens. It can't be rushed.'

Over halfway through and barely anything has happened!

The premise sounds pretty silly, B movie-ish, but the author's really pulling it off quite well. The most precarious buddy cop story you'll ever read.

“These are chickens. All they do is lay eggs.” “Maybe, but if you want to work with one of my raptors, you’re going to teach a chicken to dance.”

Goodman, Doug. Terrible Lizard: A Memoir of My Time in the Police Dinosaur Unit (p. 15). Kindle Edition.

This book isn't playing around:

'We were crucified while zombie vultures nibbled at our flesh, starved for days and then fed liquid disguised as blood that would materialize into a living parasitic fluid inside our bodies, victimized by spells that would cause our souls to be temporarily removed from our bodies and then forced to do battle with the enraged spirits of prehistoric were-apes while we watched...'

Karnov is the man. Stronger than Conan and also more interesting.