Bailey

“Don't feel bad, I'm usually about to die.”
― Rick Riordan, The Battle of the Labyrinth

“Some of the best demigods have gotten their start by blowing up toilets.”
― Rick Riordan, The Hidden Oracle

“So what are you gonna say at my funeral, now that you've killed me? Here lies the body of the love of my life, whose heart I broke without a gun to my head. Here lies the mother of my children, both living and dead. Rest in peace, my true love, who I took for granted. Most bomb p*ssy who, because of me, sleep evaded. Her god listening. Her heaven will be a love without betrayal. Ashes to ashes, dust to side chicks.”
― Beyonce

“August 2, 1914: Germany has declared war on Russia. Went swimming in the afternoon.”
― Franz Kafka