Alex

“I have seen galaxies die. I have watched atoms dance. But until I had the dark behind the eyes, I didn't know the death from the dance.”
― Terry Pratchett, Thief of Time

“Your friend Mr. Tulip would perhaps like part of your payment to be the harpsichord?" said the chair.
"It's not a --ing harpsichord, it's a --ing virginal," growled Mr. Tulip. "One --ing string to a note instead of two! So called because it was an instrument for --ing young ladies!"
"My word, was it?" said one of the chairs. "I thought it was just of sort of early piano!”
― Terry Pratchett, The Truth: Stage Adaptation

“Erm.. dear, do I ride out for Apocalypses?' Mrs War took the lid off the saucepan and prodded viciously at something inside. 'No, dear,' she said firmly. 'You always come down with a cold.”
― Terry Pratchett, Thief of Time

“That --ing zombie is going to end up on the end of a couple of --ing handy and versatile kebab skewers,' said Mr Tulip. 'An' then I'm gonna put an edge on this --ing spatula. An' then... then I'm gonna get medieval on his arse.'
There were more pressing problems, but this one intrigued Mr Pin.
'How, exactly?' he said.
'I thought maybe a maypole,' said Mr Tulip reflectively. 'An' then a display of country dancing, land tillage under the three-filed system, several plagues and, if my --ing hand ain't too tired, the invention of the --ing horse collar.”
― Terry Pratchett, The Truth: Stage Adaptation