Philip Whiteland - the man behind Josiah and Archibald (which makes it sound like we're in a queue!) Showing 201-250 of 3,307

[Patti (baconater)]

Don't worry. I put red wine on the White wine stains. I read somewhere that that is supposed to work.

Seems to have made it worse though. Let's just pull the couch over the stains.

[Philip]

Just look at the state of this place! It smells and looks like Billingsgate Market after an Alcoholics convention. I don't know...I go downstairs to watch a repeat of Lewis, and this is what happens.

[Patti (baconater)]

Oops.

HIDE GIRLS!!!

[Philip]

Good heavens! Somebody heard me. The Cloak must be losing its power - hello, out there.

[Kath]

D'oh! Missed the party (unless it's still happening?
I offered roast puppy treats on the other thread. No-one wanted any?

Hello Philip!

[Philip]

Ignite wrote: "D'oh! Missed the party (unless it's still happening?
I offered roast puppy treats on the other thread. No-one wanted any?

Hello Philip!"

You missed the party! It was held on my thread and I missed it (which I think is taking invisibility just a tad too far).

Roast puppy? It'll be fricassee of kitten next.

[Patti (baconater)]

Those prawns?

Actually they were goldfish.

[Philip]

Patti (Totally Bananas) wrote: "Those prawns?

Actually they were goldfish."

Ah, the original 'boil in the bag' snack

[Kath]

Hmm. Fricassee of kitten. Salivates.

[Philip]

Ignite wrote: "Hmm. Fricassee of kitten. Salivates."

Don't say things like that when I've got a cat on my lap. She tends to take a dim view. I guess being called 'Sushi' doesn't help.

[Kath]

Don't blame me. YOU named her!

[Philip]

Ignite wrote: "Don't blame me. YOU named her!"

No, not guilty m'lud. She was a rescue cat.

[Kath]

So she told you her name? Too clever to eat, you're right.

[Philip]

Ignite wrote: "So she told you her name? Too clever to eat, you're right."

This is getting slightly surreal. You'll have to excuse me for a moment, I've got to go and take the curtains down as someone appears to have done something unspeakable to them.

[Patti (baconater)]

Uhoh. I hope he doesn't notice the chocolate custard finger painting Gingerlily did on the wall....

[Lorraine]

hahaha !

[Gingerlily - The Full Wild]

Good morning all. What has been happening in here. Its a mess. Philip, I think you need to get a cleaning firm in or something. Cant think what that stain is all down thw wallpaper in the corner, but it smells awful.

[Lorraine]

Not guilty !

[Philip]

Gingerlily (nibbling on fingernails...) wrote: "Good morning all. What has been happening in here. Its a mess. Philip, I think you need to get a cleaning firm in or something. Cant think what that stain is all down thw wallpaper in the corner, b..."

It's an absolute disgrace, GL. My grandson wouldn't make this mess and he's 11 months old (you can find a picture of him at the end of my new book Crutches For Ducks - not that I'm advertising of course)

[Gingerlily - The Full Wild]

Reminds me of a New Years party I had once, and among the debris I found the next day was 4 false nails embedded in the carpet.

[Philip]

Gingerlily (in her snuggly new fleece pyjamas) wrote: "Reminds me of a New Years party I had once, and among the debris I found the next day was 4 false nails embedded in the carpet."

My God that sounds like a belting party! Haven't found any false nails...a few scratch marks by the door do give some cause for concern.

[Patti (baconater)]

Oh that was Dotty. She didn't want to go when Simon said it was time to leave.

[Lorraine]

Aww poor thing ! I didn't realise Simon was there ! Rather upset now - he totally ignored me !

[Patti (baconater)]

He was under his cloak. I believe he took photos.

[Lorraine]

OH DEAR !

I hope he can photoshop !

[Patti (baconater)]

I'm hoping he can't!

[Lorraine]

why ?

[Patti (baconater)]

We'll all end up with our heads on each other's bodies if he can! Or we've have tentacles or something equally hideous.
No. I said tentacles. Tentacles.

[Gingerlily - The Full Wild]

You'd end up as Cthulhu or something.

[Lorraine]

Might not be as bad as the real stuff Patti, especially the state we were in !

[Philip]

Gingerlily (in her snuggly new fleece pyjamas) wrote: "You'd end up as Cthulhu or something."

I wrote a short novel once in which one of the characters was called Ulolulu Sodme. I just thought I'd share that with you.

[Lorraine]

What's the origin of the name Philip ?

[Gingerlily - The Full Wild]

Was it any good?

[Kath]

Ulolulu Sodme? Some things are a share too far!

[Philip]

It's probably rubbish! I'm thinking about putting it on Authonomy next year for people to throw bricks at it for a while ;-) I should have mentioned that she's allegedly Scandinavian and so the O should have a whatsit through it.

[Philip]

Don't know if it's anything to do with you guys, but Crutches For Duckshas suddenly shot up the sales rankings! Not making the earth tremble, I'll give you, but still quite heartening.

[Lorraine]

only guilty of drenching it in wine, sorry !

[Philip]

Lorraine the pretty flower ♥ wrote: "only guilty of drenching it in wine, sorry !"

Well, that's probably what did it. Bit like the Queen launching a ship with champagne ;-)

[Lorraine]

Nonononono Phil. I'd be the clumsier version of the Queen and totally ruin it !

[Philip]

Lorraine the pretty flower ♥ wrote: "Nonononono Phil. I'd be the clumsier version of the Queen and totally ruin it !"

I think she's had a few disasters in her time!

[Lorraine]

If you think the same thing as I do please let's not go there Philip !

[Patti (baconater)]

Philip wrote: "Don't know if it's anything to do with you guys, but Crutches For Duckshas suddenly shot up the sales rankings! Not making the earth tremble, I'll give you, but still quite hearten..."

That's lovely news!

[Philip]

Patti (Totally Bananas) wrote: "Philip wrote: "Don't know if it's anything to do with you guys, but Crutches For Duckshas suddenly shot up the sales rankings! Not making the earth tremble, I'll give you, but stil..."

Thanks Patti. It's very early days yet and it might all crumble to dust, but it's nice to see some positive movement.

[Patti (baconater)]

Yep, it's early days yet. Musn't be impatient. I'm positive things will pick up even more once word of mouth starts to happen.

[Philip]

Lorraine the pretty flower ♥ wrote: "If you think the same thing as I do please let's not go there Philip !"

I'm pretty ambivalent to be honest, Lorraine. I doubt they're much bothered about me, so...

[Philip]

Patti (Totally Bananas) wrote: "Yep, it's early days yet. Musn't be impatient. I'm positive things will pick up even more once word of mouth starts to happen."

Very true, Patti. The difficult thing is getting that early 'traction' so that people become aware of the book by its rise up the rankings.

[Lorraine]

so... ?

[Philip]

Lorraine the pretty flower ♥ wrote: "so... ?"

so I'm not all that bothered about them. On the other hand, the idea of a republic with some form of president drawn from the great and the not-so-good of UK political life isn't attractive at all, so I guess I'm ok with what we've got.

[Lorraine]

Fair enough... to be honest having lived under both kinds I can't say one is better than the other. But then I don't think the reason is the actual system, it's the people that run the system that need ditching !

OMG ! I can't believe I'm having a conversation about politics !!??

[Philip]

Lorraine the pretty flower ♥ wrote: "Fair enough... to be honest having lived under both kinds I can't say one is better than the other. But then I don't think the reason is the actual system, it's the people that run the system that ..."

All systems are potentially ideal, provided you don't bring people into the equation ;-)