Bulimia Quotes

“I didn't realize there was a ranking." I said. "Sadie frowned. "What do you mean?" "A ranking," I said. "You know, what's crazier than what." "Oh, sure there is," Sadie said. She sat back in her chair. "First you have your generic depressives. They're a dime a dozen and usually pretty boring. Then you've got the bulimics and the anorexics. They're slightly more interesting, although usually they're just girls with nothing better to do. Then you start getting into the good stuff: the arsonists, the schizophrenics, the manic-depressives. You can never quite tell what those will do. And then you've got the junkies. They're completely tragic, because chances are they're just going to go right back on the stuff when they're out of here." "So junkies are at the top of the crazy chain," I said. Sadie shook her head. "Uh-uh," she said. "Suicides are." I looked at her. "Why?" "Anyone can be crazy," she answered. "That's usually just because there's something screwed up in your wiring, you know? But suicide is a whole different thing. I mean, how much do you have to hate yourself to want to just wipe yourself out?”
― Michael Thomas Ford

“Nothing in the world scares me as much as bulimia. It was true then and it is true now. But at some point, the body will essentially eat of its own accord in order to save itself. Mine began to do that. The passivity with which I speak here is intentional. It feels very much as if you are possessed, as if you have no will of your own but are in constant battle with your body, and you are losing. It wants to live. You want to die. You cannot both have your way. And so bulimia creeps into the rift between you and your body and you go out of your mind with fear. Starvation is incredibly frightening when it finally sets in with a vengeance. And when it does,you are surprised. You hadn't meant this. You say: Wait, not this. And then it sucks you under and you drown.”
― Marya Hornbacher, Wasted: A Memoir of Anorexia and Bulimia

“I have a remarkable ability to delete all better judgement from my brain when I get my head set on something. I have no sense of moderation, no sense of caution. I have no sense pretty much.”
― Marya Hornbacher, Wasted: A Memoir of Anorexia and Bulimia

“So there you have it--my sorry tale. That's how something I though I controlled ended up controlling me.”
― Sarah Darer Littman, Purge

“The barriers we face in life are so often the ones we create in our minds. As a child I couldn’t open that wooden gate because my body prevented me from doing so. As a teenager it seemed I couldn’t open that door because my mind held me hostage. The world that waited beyond it now was no longer one of safety or escape. Instead, I knew every time that I opened that door, it would be to a life of psychological insecurity and emotional entrapment. She - that cerebral leech who clung to all my thoughts - convinced me of this fact. Only with her could I find and maintain an asylum of mental armour”
― Leanne Waters, My Secret Life

“My body had never felt so small or so fragile. In one sense, it was a moment of ecstasy and I was comforted with soft, almost compassionate, encouragement.

"Delicate," she said. The word imprinted on me like the cold before it. I was weak and going numb, but I was delicate. This is what I had wanted. I wanted to lose weight and retain some ounce of delicacy to resemble that of the spider-figured women I had seen in all those flashing images. Suddenly, the lack of strength displayed by my body was counterbalanced with a surging lease of mental satisfaction and might. As I lay in bed, buried under all my layers of clothes and bed sheets, the warmth still could not reach me. It was too late for that now and I didn’t care. I just wanted to sleep, basking in my success and enduring the cold until I could finally slip into a forgetful slumber.”
― Leanne Waters, My Secret Life

“You see, a binge is almost always inevitable when one goes withut eating for such a long period of time. It doesn't just satisfy the physical hunger that becomes you; it nourishes the psychological need to escape from your own controlling mind. In this way, the binge presents itself as the ultimate loss of control.”
― Leanne Waters, My Secret Life

“I was never aiming for bulimia. I was attempting to have anorexia, but I couldn't keep it up without my mom.”
― Jennette McCurdy

“He helped me sit up on my bed and tried to force-feed me glucose dissolved in water and a biscuit he’d grabbed from my roommate’s bedside. But I spat it right out, still thinking about calories and numbers.
“That’s enough, Amira. I’m literally trying to feed you water. It’s not going to hurt you!” he screamed.”
― Insha Juneja, Imperfect Mortals : A Collection of Short Stories

“That was when I realized I had no control over my actions anymore. All I knew was that though no one knew what hell felt like, my life had become a version of fire and brimstone. My restrictive anorexia was completely and inexorably interfering with my ability to live like a normal human being.”
― Insha Juneja, Imperfect Mortals : A Collection of Short Stories

“The better question is: Do you want to recover?”
I didn’t have an answer; I wasn’t sure. Recovery sounded great on paper and in the calm and casual way he said it. But why did the very thought of recovery seem like the most excruciating and difficult thing? What if I started hating myself after a few months of making conscious efforts to be a healthy person again? What if recovery meant being fat all over again? What if I wasn’t ready?
“I’m not sure,” I said.”
― Insha Juneja, Imperfect Mortals : A Collection of Short Stories

“It was haunting to be entangled in this obnoxious cycle. I want to get out of this viciousness. That pizza is staring at me. I think that slice of pie might hurt me. Thirty-five calories for an Oreo cookie; 75caloriesfor a slice of bread; 285 for a slice of pizza; 350for a plate of pasta. You know, maybe I’ll just study the digits of eggs, wheat, vegetables, apples, oranges. Ugh! Stop. It all hurts so much. That’s it. Make it stop. Please, I beg you. Just make it stop.
I felt like the walking and living encyclopedia of numbers and digits.”
― Insha Juneja, Imperfect Mortals : A Collection of Short Stories

“The scars of my anorexia, perfectly hand-drawn in red, immaculately colouring one-fourth of my left arm. It had hurt like hell, but it still wasn’t as painful as the last two years of my life. The mental, excruciating pain within the depths of my brain had managed to surpass the aching pain of the pointed edge of the object I’d used on my arm. I’d thought that overshadowing the pain I already felt with a much harsher form and intensity would make the emotional pain disappear.
I was wrong. The latter pain always remains stronger; that is something I realized.”
― Insha Juneja, Imperfect Mortals : A Collection of Short Stories

“Hundreds and hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of strange little girls screaming through their fingers. My patient sisters, always waiting for me. I scroll through our confessions and rants and prayers, desperation eating us one slow bloody bite at a time.”
― Laurie Halse Anderson, Wintergirls

“I remembered all those times when the people around me believed that I had spent the last two years of my life faking an eating disorder for the sole purpose of attention. For that reason, every day I would read a thousand articles and watch a hundred videos on real survivors who’d battled anorexia. Then I would question myself. My ribs aren’t popping out of my stomach, so maybe it’s actually just in my mind. Then after a few days of surviving on nothing at all, I would look at myself, see my ribs popping out and ask myself, Am I now?”
― Insha Juneja, Imperfect Mortals : A Collection of Short Stories

“I asked myself this question every single day: Is it possible to break free? To break free from myself?
It wasn’t by choice that I became this awfully unhappy. Something, I don’t know what, came upon me and my happiness was snatched away from me in a jiffy. Everything started to feel different. Something didn’t feel right when I woke up every morning and went to bed every night. Something didn’t feel right when I looked at myself in the mirror every 15minutes.Something didn’t feel right when my favourite doughnut became my worst enemy. Something didn’t feel right when all my mind was surrounded by was the pathetic, established standards of bikini bodies and skinny models.”
― Insha Juneja

“It wasn’t like I had started magically eating two entire meals in a day. I would still survive the day with black coffee and apples, but it just seemed like I’d taken one step heavenwards. The mirror felt a little less frightening with each passing day. It was refreshing to talk to someone who was fully convinced that my eating disorder was as real as I thought.”
― Insha Juneja, Imperfect Mortals : A Collection of Short Stories

“Everything was going perfectly well until Dr. Roy paused for a long minute to stare at me with utter shock and revelation.
I knew I had messed up. I should have just worn my black, full-sleeved dress instead. But again, I thought that the scars had lightened to an unnoticeable extent. But I guess I was wrong. That was when I realized that scars never went away entirely.
“Did you do that to yourself?” he asked.”
― Insha Juneja, Imperfect Mortals : A Collection of Short Stories

“I wanted to be normal again. I wanted to be genuinely happy again and not just pretend. I didn’t want distorted mirror images to destroy and define my life any longer. I wished to breathe in the customary air, instead of the suffocating one people like me had accustomed themselves to breathe. I just wanted to break through these metal rods that I’d been caged behind for the last two years of my life. I wanted to feel plain, simple, genuine contentment again. I wanted to; I needed to.”
― Insha Juneja, Imperfect Mortals : A Collection of Short Stories

“You get what you focus on so change your focus.”
― Kate Hudson-Hall, Bulimia Sucks!: 10 Simple Steps to Stop Bingeing and Purging

“Anorexia is regal, in control, all powerful. Bulimia is out of control, chaotic, pathetic, poor mans anorexia. I have friends with anorexia and I can tell they pity me.”
― Jennette McCurdy, I'm Glad My Mom Died

“Understanding the starvation protection response helps eating disorders patients understand why restrictive dieting doesn't work.”
― Riadh Abed, Evolutionary Psychiatry: Current Perspectives on Evolution and Mental Health

“Everyone knows that the environments we created to satisfy our wishes for sweets, salt, fat and leisure have resulted in epidemics of chronic disease. Obesity and eating disorders are prime examples, but alcoholism and drug addiction are also made possible by ready access to substances and means of administration that have only recently become available. Lack of selection until recent times against these often fatal disorders is an essential part of any evolutionary explanation.”
― Riadh Abed, Evolutionary Psychiatry: Current Perspectives on Evolution and Mental Health

“I don't understand models. They starve to stay thin so that they can feed themselves..”
― Ljupka Cvetanova, Yet Another New Land

“The sexual competition hypothesis suggests that women are vulnerable to eating disorders because modern media augment the natural motivation for having a desirable body in order to get better mates. This explains why so many women use extreme caloric restriction in intense efforts to be attractive, but it does not by itself explain anorexia nervosa and bulimia.”
― Riadh Abed, Evolutionary Psychiatry: Current Perspectives on Evolution and Mental Health

“The belief that one is unattractive can be as intractable as the belief that one has an undiagnosed disease. It's often present in people who are, to other people's perceptions, very attractive indeed. However, once the belief in one's unattractiveness gets established it can be used to account for all manner of experiences, such as being rejected by a date. The normal trait related to this disorder is wanting to be attractive. In the usual range, this is almost certainly useful.”
― Riadh Abed, Evolutionary Psychiatry: Current Perspectives on Evolution and Mental Health

“Female reproductive life history is linked to cardiovascular, metabolic, inflammatory and endocrine alterations to physiology in ways that have not only short-term but also long-term and, in some cases, permanent effects.”
― Riadh Abed, Evolutionary Psychiatry: Current Perspectives on Evolution and Mental Health

“Al parecer el apetito humano es sorprendentemente elástico, algo que tiene mucho sentido desde el punto de vista evolutivo: nuestro antepasados cazadores-recolectores consideraban apropiado darse un festín cada vez que se presentaba la ocasión, lo que les permitía almacenar reservas de grasa en previsión de futuras hambrunas. Los investigadores de la obesidad llaman a este rasgo -el gen ahorrador-. Y si bien este gen resulta muy útil como medio de adaptación en un entorno impredecible marcado por la escasez de comida, es un desastre en un entorno donde abunda la comida rápida y en el que las ocasiones para darse un festín se presentan veinticuatro horas al día, siete días a la semana. Nuestros cuerpos están almacenando reservas de grasa en previsión de una hambruna que nunca llega.”
― Michael Pollan, The Omnivore's Dilemma: A Natural History of Four Meals

“Al parecer el apetito humano es sorprendentemente elástico, algo que tiene mucho sentido desde el punto de vista evolutivo: nuestros antepasados cazadores-recolectores consideraban apropiado darse un festín cada vez que se presentaba la ocasión, lo que les permitía almacenar reservas de grasa en previsión de futuras hambrunas. Los investigadores de la obesidad llaman a este rasgo -el gen ahorrador-. Y si bien este gen resulta muy útil como medio de adaptación en un entorno impredecible marcado por la escasez de comida, es un desastre en un entorno donde abunda la comida rápida y en el que las ocasiones para darse un festín se presentan veinticuatro horas al día, siete días a la semana. Nuestros cuerpos están almacenando reservas de grasa en previsión de una hambruna que nunca llega.”
― Michael Pollan, The Omnivore's Dilemma: A Natural History of Four Meals

“i get it, you're a handsome latin action hero, i'm a trailer troll with the wrong eating disorder”
― Jason Pargin, Futuristic Violence and Fancy Suits