aimee > aimee's Quotes

“Vhat ozzer abilities do you haf?" ter Borcht snapped, which his assistant waited, pen in hand.
Gazzy thought. "I have X-ray vision," he said. He peered at ter Borcht's chest, then blinked and looked alarmed.
Ter Borcht was startled for a second, but then he frowned. "Don't write dat down," he told his assistant in irritation. The assistant froze in midsentence.
"You. Do you haf any qualities dat distinguish you in any way?"
Nudge chewed on a fingernail. "You mean, like, besides the WINGS?" She shook her shoulders gently, and her beautiful fawn-colored wings unfolded a bit.
His face flushed, and I felt like cheering. "Yes," he said stiffly. "Besides de vings."
"Hmm. Besides de vings." Nudge tapped one finger against her chin. "Um..." Her face brightened. "I once ate nine Snickers bars in one sitting. Without barfing. That was a record!"
"Hardly a special talent," ter Borcht said witheringly.
Nudge was offended. "Yeah? Let's see YOU do it."
...
"I vill now eat nine Snickers bars," Gazzy said in a perfect, creepy imitation of ter Borcht's voice, "visout bahfing."
Iggy rubbed his forehead with one hand. "Well, I have a highly developed sense of irony."
Ter Borcht tsked. "You are a liability to your group. I assume you alvays hold on to someone's shirt, yes? Following dem closely?"
"Only when I'm trying to steal their dessert"
...Fang pretended to think, gazing up at the ceiling. "Besides my fashion sense? I play a mean harmonica."
"I vill now destroy de Snickuhs bahrs!" Gazzy barked.”
― James Patterson

“They turned to Angel. "We will call you Little One," the leader said, obviously deciding to dispense with the whole confusing name thing.
"Okay," said Angel agreeably. "I'll call you Guy in a White Lab Coat." He frowned.
"That can be his Indian name," I suggested.”
― James Patterson, Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports

“I feel like, like pudding," Iggy groaned. "Pudding with nerve endings. Pudding in great pain.”
― James Patterson, The Angel Experiment

“I took a bite of cookie and chewed. “Hmmm,” I said, trying not to spit crumbs. “Clear vanilla notes, too-sweet chocolate chips, distinct flavor of brown sugar. A decent cookie, not spectacular. Still, a good-hearted cookie, not pretentious.” I turned to Fang. “What say you?”
“It’s fine.”
Some people just don’t have what it takes to appreciate a cookie.”
― James Patterson, The Angel Experiment

“How did you become blind, uh, Jeff is it?"
Yeah, Jeff. Well, I looked directly at the sun, you know, the way they always tell you not to. If only I had listened.”
― James Patterson, School's Out—Forever

“That was the funniest thing I'd heard in days.
You're kidding, right? PLEASE tell me you have a stronger motive for me than 'fair is fair.' Life isn't FAIR, Dean....Nothing is fair, EVER. That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard. I need to help you because FAIR IS FAIR? Try, 'I need you to help me so I won't rip out your spine and beat you with it.' I MIGHT respond to that. MAYBE.”
― James Patterson, School's Out—Forever

“Now, Max, I think we both know your parents aren't missionaries."
I opened my eyes wide. "No? Well, for God's sake, don't tell them. They'd be crushed. Thinking they're doing the
Lord's work and all.”
― James Patterson, School's Out—Forever

“In the dictionary, next to the word stress, there is a picture of a midsize mutant stuck inside a dog crate, wondering if her destiny is to be killed or to save the world. Okay, not really. But there should be.”
― James Patterson, The Angel Experiment

“Tell me again what we're doing here," I said, running a continuous scan of our surroundings.
Fang popped some Cracker Jack into his mouth. "We're here to watch manly men do manly things."
I followed Fang's line of sight: He was watching the Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders, who were not doing manly things, by any stretch of the imagination.”
― James Patterson, Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports

“I vill eat nine Snikuhs bahs visout bahfing”
― James Patterson, Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports

“Dr. Martinez: "I take it you don't want me to call your parent?"
Max: "Uh, no." Hello, lab? May I speak to the test tube please?”
― James Patterson, The Angel Experiment

“So there you have it, the extent of my charms: brown hair and eyes like unbarfed chocolate. I'm a lucky girl." -Max”
― James Patterson, Max

“Oh no! Don't drag us away from Antartica and take us to the playground of the rich and famous! Not that briar patch! -Max”
― James Patterson, The Final Warning

“What?" I said, suspicion starting to rise in me. "When did they start coming after you?"
"Was it— was it after the oil-slick Hummer crash?" the Gasman asked Iggy tentatively.
My eyes widened. Oil-slick Hummer crash?
Iggy rubbed his chin, thinking.
"Or maybe it was more— after the bomb," the Gasman said in a low voice, looking down.
"I think it was the bomb," Iggy agreed. "That definitely seemed to tick them off.”
― James Patterson, The Angel Experiment

“On the other hand, sometimes a happy delusion is better than grim reality.”
― James Patterson, Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports

“There's nothing more dangerous than than someone trying to act for the greater good.”
― James Patterson, Angel

“Iggy. This is not a democracy," I said,(...)"It's
a Maxocracy.”
― James Patterson, The Angel Experiment

“Total?" I called. He looked up alertly, then ran over to me, small pink tongue hanging out.
Total?" I said when he was close. "Can you talk?"
He flopped down on the grass, panting slightly. "Yeah. So?"
Jeezum. I mean, mutant weirdos are nothing new to me, you know? But a talking dog?”
― James Patterson, School's Out—Forever

“Then, Holden, the little Fang gang kid, came out of nowhere with an apparent death wish. He raced directly toward the maniac with the gun shrieking something that sounded like " I am Starfishhh!”
― James Patterson

“A Poem
By Max

White is the color of little bunnies with pink noses.
White is the color of fluffy clouds fluffing their way across the sky.
White is the color of angel's wings and Angel's wings.
White is the color of brand-new ankle socks fresh out of the bag.
White is the color of crisp sheets in schmancy hotels.
White is the color of every last freaking, gol-danged thing you see for endless miles and miles if you happen to be in Antarctica trying to save the world, which now you aren't so sure you can do because you feel like if you see any more whiteness-Wonder Bread, someone's underwear, teeth-you will completely and totally lose your ever-lovin' mind and wind up pushing a grocery cart full of empty cans around New York City, muttering to yourself.

That was my first poem ever.
Okay, so it's not Shakespeare, but I liked it.”
― James Patterson, The Final Warning

“I hoped I wasn't actually dead. That would make finding our parents and saving the world really hard.”
― James Patterson, School's Out—Forever

“The hamster called. He wants his home back.”
― James Patterson, The Final Warning

“I don't damsel well. Distress, I can do. Damseling? Not so much.”
― James Patterson, Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports

“Why was the blind guy playing with matches, you ask? Because he's good at it. Anything to do with fire, igniting things, exploding things, things with fuses, wicks, accelerants . . . Iggy's your man. It's one of those good/bad things.”
― James Patterson, The Angel Experiment

“You know how it is with cats: They don't really have owners, they have staff.”
― P.C. Cast, Chosen

“Don't you think baby corns are scary? There's just something wrong about their midget bodies.”
― P.C. Cast, Marked

“Is this one of those keep-your-friends-close-and-your-enemies-closer things?"
"I though it was keep your friends close so you have someone to drive the car when you sneak over to your enemy's house at night and throw up in his mailbox.”
― Cassandra Clare, City of Fallen Angels

“My cat is not insane, she's just a really good actress.”
― P.C. Cast, Untamed

“Oh for craps sake. You're not dying again, are you? It's seriously inconvenient when you do that." -Aphrodite”
― P.C. Cast

“I'm a monster, not a moron.”
― P.C. Cast & Kristin Cast, Hunted