Quotes - Nemo (NemoBlue) Showing 1-20 of 20

#1

“When I was your age, television was called books.”
― William Goldman, The Princess Bride

tags: book, fantasy, humour

#2

“So you're a Shadowhunter,' Nate said. 'De Quincey told me that you lot were monsters.'
'Was that before or after he tried to eat you?' Will inquired.”
― Cassandra Clare, Clockwork Angel

tags: clockwork-angel, humour, nathaniel-gray, will-herondale, wit

2199 likes

#3

“To get back my youth I would do anything in the world, except take exercise, get up early, or be respectable.”
― Oscar Wilde

tags: humour

1969 likes

#4

“Like water leaking through a dam," said Piper.
"Yeah," smiled Percy. "We've got a dam hole."
"What?" Piper asked.
"Nothing," he said. "Inside joke.”
― Rick Riordan, The Mark of Athena

tags: humour

1846 likes

#5

“I'd rather be a rising ape than a falling angel.”
― Terry Pratchett

1273 likes

#6

“I came from a real tough neighborhood. Why, every time I shut the window I hurt somebody's fingers.”
― Rodney Dangerfield

tags: funny, humour, neighborhoods

965 likes

#7

“You're not very nice," I say, grinning.
"You're one to talk."
"Hey, I could be nice if I tried."
"Hmm." He taps his chin. "Say something nice, then."
"You're very good-looking."
He smiles, his teeth a flash in this dark. "I like this 'nice' thing.”
― veronica roth, Allegiant

tags: allegiant, divergent, divergent-series, four, humour, tobias, tris, tris-and-tobias

1143 likes

#8

“Everybody does have a book in them, but in most cases that's where it should stay.”
― Christopher Hitchens

tags: books, christopher-hitchens, humour, literature, writing

1186 likes

#9

“When in doubt, ignore and be horribly unimpressed”
― Laurell. K. Hamilton

tags: humour

674 likes

#10

“You stole a boat,” she snapped. “What am I doing with you, you boat-stealing lunatic?”
― Cassandra Clare, City of Lost Souls

tags: boat-stealing-lunatic, humour

553 likes

#11

“What the hell is that?" I laughed.
"It's my fox hat."
"Your fox hat?"
"Yeah, Pudge. My fox hat."
"Why are you wearing your fox hat?" I asked.
"Because no one can catch the motherfucking fox.”
― John Green, Looking for Alaska

tags: funny, humor

6948 likes

#12

“I did not attend his funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.”
― Mark Twain

tags: classic-insult, funeral, funny, humor

7634 likes

#13

“Accept who you are. Unless you're a serial killer.”
― Ellen DeGeneres, Seriously... I'm Kidding

tags: funny

6870 likes

#14

“Once you can accept the universe as matter expanding into nothing that is something, wearing stripes with plaid comes easy.”
― Albert Einstein

tags: funny

5178 likes

#15

“When life gives you lemons, squirt someone in the eye.”
― Cathy Guiswite

tags: eyes, funny, lemons

5203 likes

#16

“It's not because I want to make out with her."
Hold on." He grabbed a pencil and scrawled excitedly at the paper as if he'd just made a mathematical breakthrough and then looked back up at me. "I just did some calculations, and I've been able to determine that you're full of shit”
― John Green, Looking for Alaska

tags: funny

4063 likes

#17

“I thought I'd lie on the floor and writhe in pain for a while," he grunted, "It relaxes me."
"It does? Oh - you're being sarcastic. That's a good sign probably.”
― Cassandra Clare, City of Ashes

tags: funny, humor

3150 likes

#18

“Damn, Claire. Warn a guy before you do a face-plant on the floor next time. I could have looked all heroic and caught you or something -Shane”
― Rachel Caine, Glass Houses

tags: funny, morganvillevampires

2410 likes

#19

“I find out a lot about myself by sleeping. Dreams, they are who I am when I’m too tired to be me.”
― Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not for Sale

2398 likes

#20

“You've gotta dance like there's nobody watching,
Love like you'll never be hurt,
Sing like there's nobody listening,
And live like it's heaven on earth.”
― William W. Purkey

tags: dance, heaven, hurt, inspirational, life, love, sing

129392 likes

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