Ava Penn > Ava's Quotes

“Jared?” His fingers were playing gently in my curls.
“Yes?” I was more than halfway asleep, perfectly warm and content, back in my own bed. With him.
“Say it for me.”
“You’re heavy.”
“No.”
“You’re a manipulative bastard.”
“No.” He was laughing.
“You’re right.”
He gave one hard tug on my hair. “That’s not it either.”
“I love you?”
He sighed contentedly. “That’s the one.”
― Marie Sexton, Promises

“THE FIRST TEN LIES THEY TELL YOU IN HIGH SCHOOL

1. We are here to help you.
2. You will have time to get to your class before the bell rings.
3. The dress code will be enforced.
4. No smoking is allowed on school grounds.
5. Our football team will win the championship this year.
6. We expect more of you here.
7. Guidance counselors are always available to listen.
8. Your schedule was created with you in mind.
9. Your locker combination is private.
10. These will be the years you look back on fondly.

TEN MORE LIES THEY TELL YOU IN HIGH SCHOOL

1. You will use algebra in your adult lives.
2. Driving to school is a privilege that can be taken away.
3. Students must stay on campus during lunch.
4. The new text books will arrive any day now.
5. Colleges care more about you than your SAT scores.
6. We are enforcing the dress code.
7. We will figure out how to turn off the heat soon.
8. Our bus drivers are highly trained professionals.
9. There is nothing wrong with summer school.
10. We want to hear what you have to say.”
― Laurie Halse Anderson, Speak

“I was like, Am I gay? Am I straight? And I realized...I'm just slutty. Where's my parade?”
― Margaret Cho

“I was determined that in fiction anyway two men should fall in love and remain in it for the ever and ever that fiction allows.”
― E.M. Forster

“Gone now was the tease. Gone was the lesson on the how's and why's. Now came the need…The need to finish, the need to come, and the need to be part of the other person.”
― Ella Frank, Try

“But I do have conversations about the Patriarchy and I am having them with gay men. At eighteen, I am discovering what generations of women have long known. The natural ally of the straight woman is the gay man because they are others losers too.”
― Caitlin Moran, How to Be a Woman

“Poor boys are easier than middle-class or rich ones. Boys who've been busted are easier than boys who have not. Southern boys are easier than Northern boys. Marines are easier than Masturbation.”
― John Valentine, Puppies

“Gay men are French women...with penises.”
― Simon Doonan, Gay Men Don't Get Fat

“The person, be it gentleman or lady, who has not pleasure in a good novel, must be intolerably stupid.”
― Jane Austen, Northanger Abbey

“Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.”
― Groucho Marx, The Essential Groucho: Writings For By And About Groucho Marx

“I love deadlines. I love the whooshing noise they make as they go by.”
― Douglas Adams, The Salmon of Doubt: Hitchhiking the Galaxy One Last Time

“Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and it may be necessary from time to time to give a stupid or misinformed beholder a black eye.”
― Jim Henson

“The difference between genius and stupidity is: genius has its limits.”
― Alexandre Dumas-fils

“Saying 'I notice you're a nerd' is like saying, 'Hey, I notice that you'd rather be intelligent than be stupid, that you'd rather be thoughtful than be vapid, that you believe that there are things that matter more than the arrest record of Lindsay Lohan. Why is that?' In fact, it seems to me that most contemporary insults are pretty lame. Even 'lame' is kind of lame. Saying 'You're lame' is like saying 'You walk with a limp.' Yeah, whatever, so does 50 Cent, and he's done all right for himself.”
― John Green

“I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.”
― Groucho Marx

“The story so far:
In the beginning the Universe was created.
This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move.”
― Douglas Adams, The Restaurant at the End of the Universe

“I love mankind ... it's people I can't stand!!”
― Charles M. Schulz

“The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.”
― Terry Pratchett, Diggers

“Reality continues to ruin my life.”
― Bill Watterson, The Complete Calvin and Hobbes

“Go to heaven for the climate and hell for the company.”
― Benjamin Franklin Wade

“Some people never go crazy. What truly horrible lives they must lead.”
― Charles Bukowski

“A lady's imagination is very rapid; it jumps from admiration to love, from love to matrimony in a moment.”
― Jane Austen, Pride and Prejudice

“Have you ever noticed how ‘What the hell’ is always the right decision to make?”
― Terry Johnson, Insignificance

“The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four people is suffering from a mental illness. Look at your 3 best friends. If they're ok, then it's you.”
― Rita Mae Brown

“Creativity is knowing how to hide your sources”
― C.E.M. Joad

“This life’s hard, but it’s harder if you’re stupid.”
― George V. Higgins, The Friends of Eddie Coyle

“I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that I don't know the answer”
― Douglas Adams

“Two wrongs don't make a right, but they make a good excuse.”
― Thomas Szasz

“There's a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line.”
― Oscar Levant

“When you're in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying, 'Damn, that was fun'.”
― Groucho Marx