Laura F > Laura's Quotes

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  • #1
    Maya Angelou
    “I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”
    Maya Angelou

  • #2
    Albert Einstein
    “I'd rather be an optimist and a fool than a pessimist and right.”
    Albert Einstein

  • #3
    Albert Einstein
    “There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.”
    Albert Einstein

  • #4
    “If ever there is tomorrow when we're not together... there is something you must always remember. You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. But the most important thing is, even if we're apart... I'll always be with you.”
    Carter Crocker

  • #5
    Louis Sachar
    “You need a reason to be sad. You don't need a reason to be happy.”
    Louis Sachar, Sideways Stories from Wayside School

  • #6
    “A ship is safe in harbor, but that's not what ships are for.”
    John A. Shedd

  • #7
    John Green
    “because nerds like us are allowed to be unironically enthusiastic about stuff. Nerds are allowed to love stuff, like jump-up-and-down-in-the-chair-can’t-control-yourself love it. Hank, when people call people nerds, mostly what they’re saying is ‘you like stuff.’ Which is just not a good insult at all. Like, ‘you are too enthusiastic about the miracle of human consciousness’.”
    John Green

  • #8
    A.A. Milne
    “Rabbit's clever," said Pooh thoughtfully.
    "Yes," said Piglet, "Rabbit's clever."
    "And he has Brain."
    "Yes," said Piglet, "Rabbit has Brain."
    There was a long silence.
    "I suppose," said Pooh, "that that's why he never understands anything.”
    A.A. Milne, Winnie-the-Pooh

  • #9
    Jon   Stewart
    “If "con" is the opposite of pro, then isn't Congress the opposite of progress? Or did we just fucking blow your mind?!?”
    Jon Stewart, America (The Book): A Citizen's Guide to Democracy Inaction

  • #10
    Matt Groening
    “Of course I’ve gone mad with power! Have you ever tried going mad without power? It’s boring and no one listens to you!
    — Russ Cargill”
    Matt Groening

  • #11
    Jerry Seinfeld
    “Now they show you how detergents take out bloodstains, a pretty violent image there. I think if you've got a T-shirt with a bloodstain all over it, maybe laundry isn't your biggest problem. Maybe you should get rid of the body before you do the wash.”
    Jerry Seinfeld

  • #12
    John Irving
    “Imagining something is better than remembering something.”
    John Irving, The World According to Garp

  • #13
    Terry Pratchett
    “There is a rumour going around that I have found God. I think this is unlikely because I have enough difficulty finding my keys, and there is empirical evidence that they exist.”
    Terry Pratchett

  • #14
    Rita Mae Brown
    “The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four people is suffering from a mental illness. Look at your 3 best friends. If they're ok, then it's you.”
    Rita Mae Brown

  • #15
    Terry Pratchett
    “If cats looked like frogs we'd realize what nasty, cruel little bastards they are. Style. That's what people remember.”
    Terry Pratchett, Lords and Ladies

  • #16
    Marilyn Monroe
    “I want to grow old without facelifts. I want to have the courage to be loyal to the face I have made.”
    Marilyn Monroe

  • #17
    Stephen Colbert
    “Wikipedia is the first place I go when I'm looking for knowledge... or when I want to create some.”
    Stephen Colbert

  • #18
    Stephen Colbert
    “Here's an easy way to figure out if you're in a cult: If you're wondering whether you're in a cult, the answer is yes.”
    Stephen Colbert, I Am America

  • #19
    C.E.M. Joad
    “Creativity is knowing how to hide your sources”
    C.E.M. Joad

  • #20
    Bernard M. Baruch
    “Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind.”
    Bernard M. Baruch

  • #21
    Albert Einstein
    “Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.”
    Albert Einstein

  • #22
    Marcus Tullius Cicero
    “A room without books is like a body without a soul.”
    Marcus Tullius Cicero

  • #23
    Douglas Adams
    “There is a theory which states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable.

    There is another theory which states that this has already happened.”
    Douglas Adams, The Restaurant at the End of the Universe

  • #24
    Robert A. Heinlein
    “Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.”
    Robert A. Heinlein

  • #25
    Terry Pratchett
    “The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.”
    Terry Pratchett, Diggers

  • #26
    Terry Pratchett
    “Give a man a fire and he's warm for a day, but set fire to him and he's warm for the rest of his life.”
    Terry Pratchett, Jingo

  • #27
    D.J. MacHale
    “There are two types of people in this world. People who hate clowns...and clowns. (Bobby Pendragon)”
    D. J. MacHale, The Quillan Games

  • #28
    Jerry Seinfeld
    “Sometimes the road less traveled is less traveled for a reason”
    Jerry Seinfeld

  • #29
    Jerry Seinfeld
    “According to most studies, people's number one fear is public speaking. Number two is death. Death is number two. Does that sound right? This means to the average person, if you go to a funeral, you're better off in the casket than doing the eulogy.”
    Jerry Seinfeld

  • #30
    Scott Adams
    “You're thinking I'm one of those wise-ass California vegetarians who is going to tell you that eating a few strips of bacon is bad for your health. I'm not. I say its a free country and you should be able to kill yourself at any rate you choose, as long as your cold dead body is not blocking my driveway.”
    Scott Adams



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