Sarah > Sarah's Quotes

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#1

“You know, Hobbes, some days even my lucky rocket ship underpants don't help.”
― Bill Watterson

tags: bad-day, calvin-and-hobbes, luck

2893 likes

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#2

“I hope your bacon burns.”
― Diana Wynne Jones , Howl’s Moving Castle

1236 likes

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#3

“Check out that one at the end. He's taken the form of a footstool. Weird...but somehow I like his style."

"That is a footstool.”
― Jonathan Stroud, The Golem's Eye

tags: humor

216 likes

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#4

“Snape raised his wand and pointed it directly at Dumbledore.
"Avada Kedavra!”
― J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince

tags: avada-kedavra, death, dumbledore, snape

177 likes

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#5

“The scar had not pained Harry for nineteen years. All was well.”
― J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows

tags: harry-potter

2963 likes

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#6

“I love you like a fat kid loves cake!”
― Scott Adams

tags: food, humor, love

3915 likes

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#7

“Do you bite your thumb at us, sir?
SAMPSON [Aside to Gregory]: Is the law of our side, if I say ay?
GREGORY [Aside to Sampson]: No.
SAMPSON: No, sir, I do not bite my thumb at you, sir, but I bite my thumb, sir.”
― William Shakespeare, Romeo and Juliet

tags: insult

760 likes

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#8

“Popcorn for breakfast! Why not? It's a grain. It's like, like, grits, but with high self-esteem.”
― James Patterson, The Angel Experiment

tags: food

1190 likes

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#9

“Now it was just the three of us: the leader, the warrior, and the kid about to wet his pants. Guess who I was.”
― D.J. MacHale

tags: funny

494 likes

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#10

“I don't like lollipops.”
― Eoin Colfer, Artemis Fowl

386 likes

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#11

“(about his terrible attempt at making a sandwich) It's more difficult than it looks. (Artemis Fowl)”
― Eoin Colfer, The Eternity Code

225 likes

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#12

“So many books, so little time.”
― Frank Zappa

tags: books, humor

151531 likes

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#13

“The person, be it gentleman or lady, who has not pleasure in a good novel, must be intolerably stupid.”
― Jane Austen, Northanger Abbey

tags: aliteracy, books, classic, humor

51616 likes

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#14

“Be nice to nerds. You may end up working for them. We all could.”
― Charles J. Sykes, Dumbing Down Our Kids: Why American Children Feel Good About Themselves But Can't Read, Write or Add

tags: humor, misattributed-to-bill-gates, nerd, nerds, work

15553 likes

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#15

“Reality continues to ruin my life.”
― Bill Watterson, The Complete Calvin and Hobbes

tags: calvin-and-hobbes, humor, life

21179 likes

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#16

“The Guide says there is an art to flying", said Ford, "or rather a knack. The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.”
― Douglas Adams, Life, the Universe and Everything

tags: flight, flying, hg2g, humor

4989 likes

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#17

“What strange creatures brothers are!”
― Jane Austen

tags: brothers, siblings

934 likes

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#18

“And I fell violently on my face.”
― Edgar Allan Poe, Great Tales and Poems

243 likes

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#19

“How dare you open a spaceman's helmet on an uncharted planet? My eyeballs could've been sucked from their sockets!”
― Cathy East Dubowski, Disney's Toy Story

258 likes

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#20

“You should eat a waffle! You can't be sad if you eat a waffle!”
― Lauren Myracle, ttfn

tags: funny, humor, waffles

1444 likes

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#21

“Do you ever think if people heard our conversations they'd lock us up?"
All the time.”
― Wendy Mass, Jeremy Fink and the Meaning of Life

tags: flotsam, funny, humor, jeremy-fink, jetsam, keys, lizzy, wendy-mass, what-i-always-think

2112 likes

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#22

“Thou mad mustachio purple-hued maltworms!”
― William Shakespeare

227 likes

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#23

“There is nothing better than a friend, unless it is a friend with chocolate.”
― Linda Grayson

tags: chocolate, friendship

16482 likes

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#24

“Do you know what breakfast cereal is made of? It's made of all those little curly wooden shavings you find in pencil sharpeners!”
― Roald Dahl

tags: food, humor

735 likes

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#25

“I want an Oompa-Loompa!' screamed Veruca.”
― Roald Dahl, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory

tags: greed, role-models

194 likes

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#26

“Just because you have the emotional range of a teaspoon doesn't mean we all have.”
― J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

tags: hermione

13642 likes

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#27

“I hope you're pleased with yourselves. We could all have been killed - or worse, expelled. Now if you don't mind, I'm going to bed.”
― J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone

2835 likes

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#28

“First sign of madness, talking to your own head.”
― J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

tags: insanity, madness

801 likes

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#29

“Why are you worrying about YOU-KNOW-WHO, when you should be worrying about YOU-NO-POO? The constipation sensation that's gripping the nation!”
― J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince

tags: humor

2650 likes

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#30

“All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt.”
― Charles M. Schulz

tags: chocolate, food, humor

26799 likes

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