Paddy O'callaghan > Paddy's Quotes

“He turns to the Council. 'Sounds like Foolish behavior to me, boys. I hereby nominate the human race for membership in the Council of Fools!' He raises both arms and shouts to the sky. 'Humanity! Join us! Join your masters! All opposed, say nay!"

And then nothing but silence and Flip's panting as he strains, listening.

'There are no dissenting votes!' he cries. 'I hereby admit humanity to the Council of Fools!' He punches the air in triumph. 'Dude,' he says, grinning, 'I just upped our membership by six billion. Not bad, huh?”
― Barry Lyga, Hero-Type

“Purple Mike promises to be an intriguing read that will teach anyone who wants to know about the highs and lows of drug addiction. Purple Mike is a legal, natural high. Enjoy reading.”
― Sin Mils

“Cass had a few points but, really, a vampire? Who believed in such a myth? What was Cass suggesting anyway? That I grab my rosary and head for the nearest church begging for holy water? Line my door and windows with salt? Sleep with a wooden stake under my pillow? Hang garlic bulbs from my bedroom door? Why was I even considering these options?”
― Jayde Scott, A Job From Hell

“Great. You want me to steal from the local thug. What a delightful way to die.”
― Jayde Scott, A Job From Hell

“The shapes inched closer. I gaped at them, trying to discern their features. "I think I see dead people," I whispered.
"Yep," Aidan said, smiling. "More vampire jokes. You're just fine, then. Once this is over, you and my brother will be BFFs." He wrapped his arms around me, pressing me against his broad chest. Against my better judgement, I leaned into him, strangely comforted.”
― Jayde Scott, A Job From Hell

“Help those who can't help themselves.”
― Jerry Wright Jr

“Thurber was asked by a correspondent: "Why did you have a comma in the sentence, 'After dinner, the men went into the living-room'?" And his answer was probably one of the loveliest things ever said about punctuation. "This particular comma," Thurber explained, "was Ross's way of giving the men time to push back their chairs and stand up.”
― Lynne Truss, Eats, Shoots & Leaves: The Zero Tolerance Approach to Punctuation

“A panda walks into a cafe. He orders a sandwich, eats it, then draws a gun and fires two shots in the air.

"Why?" asks the confused waiter, as the panda makes towards the exit. The panda produces a badly punctuated wildlife annual and tosses it over his shoulder.

"I'm a panda," he says, at the door. "Look it up."

The waiter turns to the relevant entry and, sure enough, finds an explanation.

Panda. Large black-and-white bear-like mammal, native to China. Eats, shoots and leaves.”
― Lynne Truss, Eats, Shoots & Leaves: The Zero Tolerance Approach to Punctuation

“The rule is: don’t use commas like a stupid person. I mean it.”
― Lynne Truss, Eats, Shoots & Leaves: The Zero Tolerance Approach to Punctuation

“Oliver heard Louis’ voice before he saw him. “Beautiful women?” he was saying. Then the door opened and the woman reappeared, holding the wooden lion between her arms. “Where are they? Have they come to see the -- Oliver!”
“Hello, Louis,” Oliver said.
Louis pointed at him. “He’s no beautiful woman!” he said. Then he noticed Sophie and Julia and his whole attitude changed. He dropped his voice to a husky tone. “Why, hello there, ladies.”
― Zeinab Alayan, Puppet Parade

“Sophie coughed, and Oliver felt his cheeks becoming warm.
“Don’t be an ass, Andrew.”
“That’s a little bit difficult to accomplish, y’know?” Andrew replied. “I mean, if you had been so kind as to paint me with black and white stripes, I would’ve been a zebra!”
― Zeinab Alayan, Puppet Parade

“Loving what you do makes going to work less like work and more like fun.”
― Riley Banks

“Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.”
― Oscar Wilde

“A room without books is like a body without a soul.”
― Marcus Tullius Cicero

“You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.”
― Mae West

“It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good riding crop must be in want of a pair of bare buttocks to trash.”
― William Codpiece Thwackery, Fifty Shades of Mr Darcy: A Parody

“I do not make love, Miss Bennet," he had told her."I bonk. I have it off. I get my end way, I rodger, I boff.”
― William Codpiece Thwackery, Fifty Shades of Mr Darcy: A Parody

“Nothing is more fun than to watch zealots go off the rails. They try to present themselves as rational, independent-minded persons like yourselves, balanced individuals who have examined our great wide world, weighed their options carefully, then coolly decided to devote their lives to Beanie Babies.”
― Neil Steinberg

“Be not afraid of greatness. Some are born great, some achieve greatness, and others have greatness thrust upon them.”
― William Shakespeare, Twelfth Night

“I became insane, with long intervals of horrible sanity.”
― Edgar Allan Poe

“Those who dream by day are cognizant of many things which escape those who dream only by night.”
― Edgar Allan Poe, Eleonora

“We loved with a love that was more than love.”
― Edgar Allen Poe

“He who aims too high will get a sore neck”
― Michelle Cohen Corasanti, The Almond Tree

“Good things make choosing difficult.Bad things leave no choice”
― Michelle Cohen Corasanti, The Almond Tree

“Many great men can attribute their success to the fact that they didn't have the advantages other men had”
― Michelle Cohen Corasanti, The Almond Tree

“Permission to buy apricots and oranges from my own trees, the ones my great grandfather planted and i kept alive in drought and war”
― Michelle Cohen Corasanti, The Almond Tree

“You cannot go back and make a new start, but you can start now and make a new ending”
― Michelle Cohen Corasanti, The Almond Tree