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  • #1
    Douglas Adams
    “I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that I don't know the answer”
    ― Douglas Adams
    tags: attributed-no-source, humor, misattributed-douglas-adams, wit
    11368 likes

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  • #2
    Ambrose Bierce
    “The covers of this book are too far apart.”
    ― Ambrose Bierce
    tags: attributed-no-source, books, criticism, humor, wit
    1599 likes

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  • #3
    Frank Zappa
    “So many books, so little time.”
    ― Frank Zappa
    tags: books, humor
    151871 likes

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  • #4
    Albert Einstein
    “Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.”
    ― Albert Einstein
    tags: attributed-no-source, human-nature, humor, infinity, philosophy, science, stupidity, universe
    148593 likes

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  • #5
    Oscar Wilde
    “I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.”
    ― Oscar Wilde, The Happy Prince and Other Stories
    tags: intelligence, self-deprecation
    71746 likes

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  • #6
    Maya Angelou
    “I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”
    ― Maya Angelou
    89358 likes

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  • #7
    Allen Saunders
    “Life is what happens to us while we are making other plans.”
    ― Allen Saunders
    tags: fate, life, misattributed-john-lennon, planning, plans
    43688 likes

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  • #8
    William Shakespeare
    “The fool doth think he is wise, but the wise man knows himself to be a fool.”
    ― William Shakespeare, As You Like It
    tags: wisdom
    45376 likes

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  • #9
    Steve Martin
    “A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.”
    ― Steve Martin
    tags: humor, obvious, simile
    35264 likes

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  • #10
    “Whenever I feel the need to exercise, I lie down until it goes away.”
    ― Paul Terry
    tags: exercise, humor, laziness, misattributed-to-hutchins
    24397 likes

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  • #11
    W.C. Fields
    “I am free of all prejudice. I hate everyone equally. ”
    ― W.C. Fields
    18672 likes

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  • #12
    C.E.M. Joad
    “Creativity is knowing how to hide your sources”
    ― C.E.M. Joad
    tags: creativity, humor, misattributed-to-einstein, paraphrased
    13078 likes

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  • #13
    George Carlin
    “Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.”
    ― George Carlin
    tags: fighting, humor, misattributed-george-carlin, peace, sex
    4260 likes

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  • #14
    Wendy Mass
    “Do you ever think if people heard our conversations they'd lock us up?"
    All the time.”
    ― Wendy Mass, Jeremy Fink and the Meaning of Life
    tags: flotsam, funny, humor, jeremy-fink, jetsam, keys, lizzy, wendy-mass, what-i-always-think
    2112 likes

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  • #15
    Oscar Wilde
    “To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all.”
    ― Oscar Wilde
    85067 likes

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  • #16
    Oscar Wilde
    “A good friend will always stab you in the front.”
    ― Oscar Wilde
    tags: friends-betrayal
    10322 likes

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  • #17
    Oscar Wilde
    “With freedom, flowers, books, and the moon, who could not be perfectly happy?”
    ― Oscar Wilde, De Profundis
    6048 likes

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  • #18
    Oscar Wilde
    “There is only one thing in the world worse than being talked about, and that is not being talked about.”
    ― Oscar Wilde, The Picture of Dorian Gray
    tags: humor
    3783 likes

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  • #19
    Oscar Wilde
    “The suspense is terrible. I hope it will last.”
    ― Oscar Wilde
    tags: humor-suspense
    1543 likes

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  • #20
    Ambrose Bierce
    “Quotation, n: The act of repeating erroneously the words of another.”
    ― Ambrose Bierce, The Unabridged Devil's Dictionary
    tags: definitions, humor, quotations, quotes, satire
    1230 likes

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  • #21
    “It is better, I think, to grab at the stars than to sit flustered because you know you cannot reach them.”
    ― R.A. Salvatore, Sojourn
    2605 likes

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  • #22
    George Bernard Shaw
    “You see things; you say, 'Why?' But I dream things that never were; and I say 'Why not?”
    ― George Bernard Shaw, Back to Methuselah
    tags: inspirational
    3951 likes

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  • #23
    Chuck Palahniuk
    “It's so hard to forget pain, but it's even harder to remember sweetness. We have no scar to show for happiness. We learn so little from peace.”
    ― Chuck Palahniuk, Diary
    tags: happiness, pain, peace, scar, sweetness
    15770 likes

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  • #24
    Mahatma Gandhi
    “Nobody can hurt me without my permission.”
    ― Mahatma Gandhi
    tags: fighting, hurt, inner-peace, peace, permission, strength, trial
    5636 likes

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  • #25
    A.J. Cronin
    “Worry never robs tomorrow of its sorrow, but only saps today of its strength.”
    ― A.J. Cronin
    3239 likes

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  • #26
    Groucho Marx
    “Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.”
    ― Groucho Marx, The Essential Groucho: Writings For By And About Groucho Marx
    tags: animals, books, dogs, friends, humor
    38005 likes

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  • #27
    Mark Twain
    “If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.”
    ― Mark Twain
    tags: lies, lying, memory, truth
    92363 likes

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  • #28
    Benjamin Franklin Wade
    “Go to heaven for the climate and hell for the company.”
    ― Benjamin Franklin Wade
    tags: humor, misattributed-mark-twain, philosophy, theology
    19868 likes

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  • #29
    Mark Twain
    “Write what you know.”
    ― Mark Twain, The Adventures of Tom Sawyer and Adventures of Huckleberry Finn
    tags: writing
    207 likes

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  • #30
    Dorothy Parker
    “Heterosexuality is not normal, it's just common.”
    ― Dorothy Parker
    tags: dorothy-parker, heterosexuality, homosexuality, humor, wit
    1631 likes



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attributed-no-source
humor
misattributed-douglas-adams
wit
books
criticism
human-nature
infinity
philosophy
science
stupidity
universe
intelligence
self-deprecation
fate
life
misattributed-john-lennon
planning
plans
wisdom
obvious
simile
exercise
laziness
misattributed-to-hutchins
creativity
misattributed-to-einstein
paraphrased
fighting
misattributed-george-carlin
peace
sex
flotsam
funny
jeremy-fink
jetsam
keys
lizzy
wendy-mass
what-i-always-think
friends-betrayal
humor-suspense
definitions
quotations
quotes
satire
inspirational
happiness
pain
scar
sweetness
hurt
inner-peace
permission
strength
trial
animals
dogs
friends
lies
lying
memory
truth
misattributed-mark-twain
theology
writing
dorothy-parker
heterosexuality
homosexuality