KC > KC's Quotes

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  • #1
    Groucho Marx
    “Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.”
    Groucho Marx, The Essential Groucho: Writings For By And About Groucho Marx

  • #2
    Oscar Wilde
    “I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.”
    Oscar Wilde, The Happy Prince and Other Stories

  • #3
    “Insanity is doing the same thing, over and over again, but expecting different results.”
    Narcotics Anonymous

  • #4
    Douglas Adams
    “The story so far:
    In the beginning the Universe was created.
    This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move.”
    Douglas Adams, The Restaurant at the End of the Universe

  • #5
    Mark Twain
    “Never put off till tomorrow what may be done day after tomorrow just as well.”
    Mark Twain

  • #6
    Madeleine L'Engle
    “You have to write the book that wants to be written. And if the book will be too difficult for grown-ups, then you write it for children.”
    Madeleine L'Engle

  • #7
    Douglas Adams
    “For instance, on the planet Earth, man had always assumed that he was more intelligent than dolphins because he had achieved so much—the wheel, New York, wars and so on—whilst all the dolphins had ever done was muck about in the water having a good time. But conversely, the dolphins had always believed that they were far more intelligent than man—for precisely the same reasons.”
    Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy

  • #8
    J.K. Rowling
    “Remember, if the time should come when you have to make a choice between what is right and what is easy, remember what happened to a boy who was good, and kind, and brave, because he strayed across the path of Lord Voldemort. Remember Cedric Diggory.”
    J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire

  • #9
    David Sedaris
    “If you're looking for sympathy you'll find it between shit and syphilis in the dictionary.”
    David Sedaris, Barrel Fever: Stories and Essays

  • #10
    We accept the love we think we deserve.
    “We accept the love we think we deserve.”
    Stephen Chbosky, The Perks of Being a Wallflower

  • #11
    Groucho Marx
    “I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.”
    Groucho Marx

  • #12
    Douglas Adams
    “The Guide says there is an art to flying", said Ford, "or rather a knack. The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.”
    Douglas Adams, Life, the Universe and Everything

  • #13
    Garrison Keillor
    “Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car.”
    Garrison Keillor

  • #14
    Douglas Adams
    “There is a theory which states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable.

    There is another theory which states that this has already happened.”
    Douglas Adams, The Restaurant at the End of the Universe

  • #15
    “Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana.”
    Anthony G. Oettinger

  • #16
    Douglas Adams
    “The major problem—one of the major problems, for there are several—one of the many major problems with governing people is that of whom you get to do it; or rather of who manages to get people to let them do it to them.
    To summarize: it is a well-known fact that those people who must want to rule people are, ipso facto, those least suited to do it.
    To summarize the summary: anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job.”
    Douglas Adams, The Restaurant at the End of the Universe

  • #17
    Groucho Marx
    “From the moment I picked up your book until I put it down, I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it.”
    Groucho Marx

  • #18
    Toni Morrison
    “If there's a book that you want to read, but it hasn't been written yet, then you must write it.”
    Toni Morrison

  • #19
    Bill Watterson
    “Reality continues to ruin my life.”
    Bill Watterson, The Complete Calvin and Hobbes

  • #20
    Bill Watterson
    “I wish I had more friends, but people are such jerks. If you can just get most people to leave you alone, you're doing good. If you can find even one person you really like, you're lucky. And if that person can also stand you, you're really lucky.”
    Bill Watterson, The Complete Calvin and Hobbes

  • #21
    Bill Watterson
    “I'd hate to have a kid like me.”
    Bill Watterson, The Authoritative Calvin and Hobbes: A Calvin and Hobbes Treasury

  • #22
    Carolyn G. Heilbrun
    “A literary academic can no more pass a bookstore than an alcoholic can pass a bar.”
    Amanda Cross

  • #23
    Douglas Adams
    “Don't Panic.”
    Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy

  • #24
    Charles Lamb
    “I always arrive late at the office, but I make up for it by leaving early.”
    Charles Lamb

  • #25
    Groucho Marx
    “Humor is reason gone mad.”
    Groucho Marx

  • #26
    Douglas Adams
    “You live and learn. At any rate, you live.”
    Douglas Adams, Mostly Harmless

  • #27
    Douglas Adams
    “The fact that we live at the bottom of a deep gravity well, on the surface of a gas covered planet going around a nuclear fireball 90 million miles away and think this to be normal is obviously some indication of how skewed our perspective tends to be.”
    Douglas Adams, The Salmon of Doubt: Hitchhiking the Galaxy One Last Time

  • #28
    Lewis Carroll
    “She generally gave herself very good advice, (though she very seldom followed it).”
    Lewis Carroll, Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland / Through the Looking-Glass

  • #29
    Ambrose Bierce
    “The covers of this book are too far apart.”
    Ambrose Bierce

  • #30
    Douglas Adams
    “Let's think the unthinkable, let's do the undoable. Let us prepare to grapple with the ineffable itself, and see if we may not eff it after all.”
    Douglas Adams, Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency



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