Michele Knight's Blog, page 219

Don’t fancy meditation? Try this!

Did you know having a hobby from collecting Tarot cards to bird watching can have as powerful effect at removing stress as meditation? We recently wrote about how pet ownership boosts happiness and wellbeing. However, we’re aware that owning a pet may not be for everybody due to personal preferences or circumstances. So if having an animal companion isn’t for you, what can you do to experience the same kind of benefits pet owners enjoy? The answer is simple: get a hobby.

Hobbies have long been advocated by medical professionals as a way to relieve stress and boost our creativity. They also contribute to our overall appreciation of life. As clinical psychologist Dr. Ellen Kenner explains: “Happiness is a long lasting enduring enjoyment of life, it is ‘being in love with living’. Some important values are a productive career, romance, friendship – and hobbies.”

As well as enhancing our creativity, studies have shown that having a hobby can have a similar stress-reducing effect as meditation. Engaging in a hobby you like leads to the release of hormones in the brain associated with reward, satisfaction, and happiness; dopamine and oxytocin are just two examples. Concentrating on something that is not your everyday work – whether it’s painting, gardening, DIY, sewing or learning the Tarot cards, makes you feel relaxed and therefore happier.

Professor Howard Tinsley of Southern Illinois University conducted a 15 year study into the psychological benefits of having a hobby interviewing 4,000 people. Across all groups from school students to 70 year old widows the results were the same. “People who were more active in leisure activities reported greater satisfaction of life; they scored higher on standardized tests about satisfaction,” Tinsley says.

Such also people appear to function better in society. David Schlenoff, a psychologist for the Baltimore County Public Schools, studies the psychology of hobbies and collecting. His own hobby is collecting and restoring antique cars and motorcycles. “As a psychologist, for me to help someone I work with, I need to be as well balanced as I can be,” he says. “To do the best I can for my family, I need to be relaxed, I need to be centered. If hobbies provide that much-needed centering and relaxation, then you’re more available to the people you love and work with.”

But hobbies can play an important role when it comes to our soul path. Our readers are often asked by clients for help in either discovering or re-connecting to their soul path or a career that truly fulfils them. Strangely enough, the hobbies we are drawn to often contain important clues as to our true purpose. If you’re feeling adrift in a job you no longer enjoy, reviving a much loved pastime from your youth or trying out a new one may in fact lead to a breakthrough in determining your next career move.

Hobbies can also connect us with those who share our interests but even if your hobby is merely a way for you to connect to a place of peace and creativity within you, it will bring you an increased satisfaction and enjoyment of life. The best thing of all – the list of hobbies is endless and you can try out as many as you wish until you find the one or perhaps several (there’s no limit after all!) that truly make time stop when you are doing them.

The message is simple: if you want a happier life – take time out to play!

Soul Path SOS: Your Dream Job Is a Nightmare

You’ve done your quantum creating and backed it up with the steps you needed to take to get your desired result – congratulations, you’ve landed that dream job! Three months in however – your dream job has morphed into a nightmare. The boss from hell that makes Meryl Streep in The Devil Wears Prada look like the Dalai Lama. Backbiting, unfriendly co-workers wallowing in a toxic slew of gossip and office politics. An inflexible and archaic management. A workload that even 10 clones of you couldn’t handle. The list can include any mix of these things. If our dream job has turned into a nightmare it often gets us questioning ourselves, our abilities and our soul path. We were sure this was what we wanted. How come we can’t handle it or after all our work on manifesting it’s now turned out so differently to what we imagined? Are we really on the right path after all and most importantly, what do we do now? Do we quit and cut our losses? What will people say – especially employers when our CV’s reflect the short stay in the position? Do we tough it out? Have we lost our way entirely?

In the present day economy we’re told we should be grateful to have any job at all. Much less one that may be perceived by many as ‘ideal’. But anyone who understands Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs will tell you that once your basic needs are covered, you’ll automatically yearn for more. You may have your dream job, a home, a partner, children, a designer wardrobe and still wonder, ‘Is that all there is?‘

When we set out on our soul path we feel a deep need to discover our true calling and for a career that reflects that. Often for many of us this career is a big step up from where we are at present. Therefore if we feel we’ve ‘got there’ there’s now a huge barrier to letting it go – we feel we have not been true to our path or that we’ve misunderstood our calling. If you’re in this position take a step back. Is it the company and people you’re working with and not the actual job? If you transplanted your role into a totally different organisation which didn’t have the problems you’re experiencing would you now feel the passion and joy you once did?

Alternatively, as our ‘dream’ jobs often do represent big steps up, just who are you trying to impress by staying in a job you hate? Your co-workers you may not like? Your family, partner or friends? The key to truly living our soul path is to be true to ourselves. Obviously nobody should put themselves in a precarious financial position by just quitting unless they can well afford to, but if the job is not what you thought it would be then let go of what other people will think (and that includes new employers) and start to take action to change the situation by applying for something new.

We may realise that our creating centered solely around the role and not the people we were going to be working with or the organisation itself. If this is the case then ensure that your quantum creating techniques include these elements as you go about your search again.

However, our goals sometimes change as we do and on occasion you may find yourself manifesting a goal only to find it no longer fits you. If that’s the case please don’t beat yourself up about it. Another key to living an authentic life is learning and evolving. Acknowledge you have changed and what you have learned from the situation. Above all, don’t keep going for appearances sake or because you’re worried what others may think. Start to explore new options for yourself.  Personally, I’ve always believed that when you do what you love, the money will follow, and what you love may end up surprising you. It may not be “cool”, and it’s not always everyone else’s idea of a brilliant career but it may be a true reflection of who you are and what you have to give to the world.

We can’t all be internet entrepreneurs, movie stars, or win The Apprentice, but all of us can try to be happy. Some people choose to do jobs that may not pay very much but bring them huge satisfaction. Others may cut back hours (and pay) for a better work/life balance.

If you’re worried about someone thinking you’re a failure, ask yourself why their opinion counts. Don’t choose appearing to be happy and successful to others. Choose to be really happy instead. And that begins by being true to yourself.

 

I Dreamed He Left Me! Why Your Dreams Aren’t Always Nightmares

Most of us have experienced a dream that we’re very relieved to wake from. One where our partner either leaves us, betrays us or is just not there for us when we need them to be. The good news here is that these dreams very rarely turn out to be precognitions of an event that is to come. New scientific research shows that these kinds of dreams actually stem from our own subconscious fears and insecurities.

Dr. Dylan Selterman and researchers at the University of Maryland decided to study the kind of dreams people have about their romantic partners and how those dreams related to their level of security (or lack) in their relationship. Dr. Selterman and his colleagues asked a sample group of people all in committed relationships to keep a record of their dreams for two weeks. The group also completed a storytelling task designed to measure how secure they were with their partners. As we are always saying – you thoughts create your world and your experiences. People who are secure in their relationships are confident their partners are supportive but people who are insecure worry their partners will betray or abandon them – which often leads to negative emotions which fuel conflicts.

The researchers went through the dream journals looking for dreams that involved the respondent’s current partners. On average it turned out people had between three to four dreams involving their significant others over the two week test period. In other words – people tend to dream about their current partners once every three to four days. The team then rated these dreams as to whether they reflected positive or negative attachment behaviours. In other words – those people who had shown they felt secure in their relationships had dreams that reflected this – in their dreams they could turn to their partners for support and were comfortable with each other – usually in pleasant dream scenarios. However, those who felt insecure in their relationships in waking life had distressing dreams of their partners which often included conflicts and abandonment. So, the more secure the relationship was in waking life, the more secure the relationship was in dreams – and vice versa.

Many people do have prophetic dreams but often these are not literal but the information is given symbolically. This is the trick to interpreting dreams. Sometimes dreams have held the key to problems – Einstein’s theory of relativity was inspired by a dream. Hannibal based his war against the Romans on a prophetic dream – and was defeated by Scipio, a warning perhaps to treat the messages we receive in dreams with caution. But if your dream lover left you last night the chances are that your nightmare is just your subconscious playing out a deep insecurity. It doesn’t necessarily follow that they will abandon us in reality but the dream is most likely asking us to look closely at why we feel insecure. Very often it has nothing to do with our present partner but comes from an older, deeper wound. By looking at this in the calm light of day we can better understand the message behind our dream, heal any insecurities we may have around relationships and arrive at the point where our dreams really do mirror our waking life.

Want to Change Your Life? Take a Deep Breath

Physics tells us all life is energy. Every breath we take fills our bodies with life-giving energy, flooding our lungs with oxygen, and we release energy when we exhale. How many times have you sighed deeply on an out-breath, releasing tension? Hence the expression: ‘A sigh of relief’.

Surprisingly however, despite the fact that breathing is essential to life, it may surprise you to hear that many of us don’t breathe properly! We may not fill our lungs to their maximum capacity – just to the upper part of the chest instead of drawing the air down to our diaphragm. Not only are we depriving our bodies of life-giving air our literal ‘shortness of breath’ may contribute to our stress levels and have a negative effect on our overall wellbeing. This is why so many Eastern meditation techniques as well as yoga place so much emphasis on monitoring your breathing. It not only creates mindfulness and reduces stress levels, but infuses our entire being on a cellular level.

Take a moment now to look at how you are breathing just reading this article. Are you breathing deeply and does your abdomen extend as you take in a breath? Or are you suddenly aware of the fact that you are in fact taking only shallow breaths into the top half of your chest area?

Researchers have found that meditating and breathing techniques result in an improved immune system and can literally change your brains wiring. The areas in our brain which governs the ‘flight or fight’ response are the amygdala and  hypothalamus. With modern-day living these areas can get over-stimulated – after all – you’d run away from a sabre toothed-tiger who wanted to eat you but you can’t run away from your sabre-toothed boss so easily! Studies have found that people who use mindful breathing techniques in meditation had increased grey matter in the hippocampus, the area responsible for learning and memory, and decreased grey matter in the amygdale. Proving that meditation can not only re-wire our brains but that it increases conscious control of our emotions and behaviour when it comes to dealing with stressful situations.

Now you’re aware of your breathing (or lack thereof!), there are various techniques you can employ. The most well-known is of course meditating for 20 minutes or so once or twice a day and keeping your attention on your breathing, pulling your attention back to it whenever your mind starts to wander. However, despite the well-documented benefits of meditation many feel they either can’t do it or it’s not for them. A technique known as ‘core’ breathing works just as well and you can do it anywhere and at any time. It’s often adopted by athletes. Just as in meditation you become aware of your breathing, drawing the breath down to your ‘core’ – the point in your body just above your belly button, and then exhaling. It’s that literal ‘deep breath’ we all take when we want to calm our nerves. The idea is to keep doing it and become mindful of the emotions we are experiencing as we do and releasing them with our next breath. This is real ‘energy’ work. So, if you practice this technique at work when you’re being given a hard time by your boss over a deadline you may note over time your responses start to change.

This technique not only enhances your general wellbeing but can set you on a journey of profound soul discovery as it opens up the ability to control your usual responses to situations – and when we change our responses we change the outcome.

So – changing your life – and your mind – really does begin with taking a deep breath.

Do Animals Have A Consciousness? Stephen Hawkins Signs Petition.

I remember vehemently arguing with my anthropology professor that animals have a consciousness, at the time it was considered a ridiculous thing to believe. Finally science is waking up to a reality animal lovers have always known. Animal lovers know that animals demonstrate a full range of emotions. Recent studies have proved that chickens experience jealousy, rage and love. For many of us with animal companions we have observed time and time again how our animals mirror our emotions and even show psychic abilities in anticipating events.(Several experiments by the great Richard Sheldrake confirm this)

One vet even remarked that he had observed that when an animal and its human companion are extremely close one may mirror illness in the other. Animals also communicate with us – it is our fault if we don’t take the time to understand how they are doing this and what they are saying.

Now, science once again seems to have caught up with what those of us who share our life with special animal souls have always known – animals do indeed have a consciousness and are aware to the degree that human beings are. An international group of prominent scientists including Professor Stephen Hawking, cognitive scientists, neuropharmacologists, neurophysiologists, neuroanatomists, and computational neuroscientists attending the Francis Crick Memorial Conference on Consciousness in Human and Non-Human Animals signed the declaration which includes all mammals, birds and even the octopus!

While we can perhaps understand why it may be easy to acknowledge that some animal species are conscious in the way we are – such as dolphins, apes, elephants and domestic pets for example, it is heartening and far-thinking to see the declaration includes species other than mammals such as birds and even cephalopods. Research has shown that birds experience REM sleep patterns – the same as humans and other mammals. We can only imagine what birds may dream about. Research also pointed to animals employing the same kinds of decision making process as we do.

With this body of scientific evidence demonstrating that most animals are conscious in the same way that we are, and with mass vegetarianism being touted as the only way to save the planet, does this mean we will start treating animals better in general? We can only hope so. Perhaps our increased humanity towards one another will begin with our acknowledgement that animals have humanity as well. Animals may be souls more highly evolved than we are when it comes to showing us how to bring compassion, cooperation, companionship and consciousness into our lives.

The Immortality Project: Can Science ‘Prove’ Life After Death?

Extensive scientific and psychological research has proved that human beings are literally ‘hard-wired’ to have some kind of spiritual or religious belief. Free will dictates how and what we believe and how we express it – including believing in nothing which if we are to get all philosophical doesn’t exist as everything is energy and energy is matter (even dark matter which scientists have now discovered proof of) so therefore ‘nothing’ exists anyway . . . But before we disappear completely into existential territory, when it comes to the question of life after death, Professor John Martin Fischer of the University of California has just been awarded a three year $5 million grant to study the topic of life after death. This is the largest ever grant to be awarded to fund serious scientific study into this subject.

Professor Fischer intends to study both religious and non-religious views on immortality and also philosophical questions such as would we want to live forever? Seeing as many of us say we are bored stuck indoors on a rainy Sunday afternoon it does after all beg the question that perhaps immortality – at least in our present mortal form – may not be all it’s cracked up to be and part of the joy and beauty of life comes from knowing we are just here for a holiday on Earth in our present form for a time.

The university has pointed out that while there are many beliefs and a lot of anecdotal evidence of an afterlife, there has been “no comprehensive and rigorous, scientific study of global reports about near-death and other experiences, or of how belief in immortality influences human behavior.” The study will look at a range of beliefs including heaven, hell, purgatory, and karma.  As for near-death experiences, Professor Fischer has said: “We will be very careful in documenting near-death experiences and other phenomena, trying to figure out if these offer plausible glimpses of an afterlife or are biologically induced illusions. Our approach will be uncompromisingly scientifically rigorous. We’re not going to spend money to study alien-abduction reports.”

As far as near-death experiences go, Professor Fischer also intends to look at how your culture may influence your afterlife. The research will also delve into cultural aspects of the afterlife. For example, Americans report seeing a tunnel with a bright light at the end, but in Japan survivors of an NDE often report tending a garden.  Fischer also intends to look at quantum mechanical explanations: If we are material beings, how can we exist in heaven, where we would not have physical bodies (or not of the sort we have here)?

Some NDE survivors have reported their physical bodies disintegrating and merging with an energy field they have described as ‘pure love’. This would seem to support the emerging theory that all creation is the product of a conscious ‘unified’ field. Do any of you remember Jodie Foster’s quantum trip in the film Contact and how the alien sent to greet her took on the form of her dead father so she would be comfortable? Perhaps cultural differences with near-death experiences reflect this – the quantum field assumes a familiar form to guide us to our next stage of being.

None of us know for sure. And as for Professor Fischer: ‘Check back with me in three years.’ We’ll certainly be doing that!

Your Weekly Astrology Video With Michele

Wow, that Blue Moon was pretty full on! Now we have some healing. We are all facing our shadow and have the chance to liberate ourselves from past patterns. However even though Pluto the Lord of transformation is involved we have a fabulous grand trine. Make sure that you love you and use you psychic intuition to connect to the truth of what is going on. Look beneath the surface to find the root of any situation that needs transforming.

 

What Body Language REALLY Says

Body language can provide us with valuable information about what a person is really thinking or feeling. But have you in the past looked at how someone was expressing themselves physically only to get a gut feeling that something just wasn’t adding up? Now new research challenges some commonly held perceptions about body language and backs up those intuitive flashes we may have had about someone even when their body language seemed to be conveying something else entirely!

It’s true our bodies can convey our innermost thoughts, feelings and insecurities often without our realising it and we can learn to interpret these signals from others to gain clues as to their emotional states and often how they ‘feel’ about us. However, those commonly held beliefs that if someone touches their face or looks to the left they are lying or if they are crossing their arms over their chest they are on the defensive aren’t necessarily the case.

Joe Navarro spent over 25 years as a counterintelligence agent for the FBI. His job required him to become an expert on body language and he’s the author of What Every Body is Saying – a key book on reading body language. He says in order to interpret body signals correctly we must first look at the context of the situation. The biggest mistake we often make is in not following up the body language clues with a question such as ‘You appear distracted – is anything wrong?’ He gives an example from his own life of a time he went on a date and the woman seated opposite him just didn’t seem to be having a good time from her body language. Finally he asked her if anything was wrong and it turned out she didn’t know if she had remembered to lock her car – so her focus was not on the date but on her car security. If he hadn’t asked he could have left the date thinking she wasn’t interested.

Body language signals are universal and mean the same no matter what culture we come from or language we speak. Another myth however is that it can be used to tell when someone is lying. Sometimes it can but if someone is an accomplished liar – as in they are habitual liars i.e. – engage in criminal activity where lying becomes a survival tool, or are mentally unbalanced, they can fool even the professionals. Here is an example where we need to rely on our intuition. If it’s telling us something is ‘off’ despite what a person is saying or how they are acting, then we must listen.

One of the most common romantic problems we get asked about here at MK is what to do when we develop romantic feelings for a friend who doesn’t return them. This is not only hurtful but often baffling as usually the friend has been sending us signals (or so we thought!) that they wanted the relationship to evolve into something else. Joe Navarro has some interesting insights into this which may help you if you find yourself in this situation. Joe says: ‘Sometimes we just have to ask because you can get it all wrong. At the same time, some people give a lot of courtship cues accidentally and so we see the repeated smile, eye gaze, or touch as being flirtatious when, in fact, they haven’t mastered just being friendly, so it comes off as courtship displays.’

In these situations it’s too easy to end up feeling we made the whole thing up in our own heads so if you find yourself experiencing this take a step back and ask yourself if in fact your ‘friend’ has yet to learn the appropriate body language signals!

There’s no doubt that body language provides us with a host of valuable information – consider for a moment that 80% of all our communication with others is non-verbal. But of that 80% we’re not sure what percentage our intuition accounts for. What we do know however it that it is invaluable in feeding us the non-verbal information about someone that their body language fails to convey. When it comes to reading other people – intuition may still be way ahead of the curve.

Quantum Creating – Get Entangled With Your Goals

We’ve all heard the phrase that the secret to getting something is to already have some? In other words, to attract more money, love, abundance and feelings of wellbeing into your life you already have to have money, love, abundance and wellbeing. That’s fine, I hear you say, but right now I’m overdrawn, single, living on beans on toast and feel drained so how am I supposed to attract what I need when I clearly don’t have it in the first place? If this sounds like you don’t despair! Quantum physics provides us with the key to transform our situation by using a technique based on quantum entanglement.

Put simply, quantum entanglement occurs when two particles at a distance are influenced by one another. Einstein referred to this as ‘spooky action at a distance’. We have all heard how the mere act of observing a particle alters it. When quantum entanglement occurs we can have one particle changing as it is observed on one side of the universe while on the other side of the universe the particle with which it is ‘entangled’ instantaneously takes on the change even though they are clearly separated by billions of light years.

So, how does this help us manifest our goals? First it’s important to start to think of reality as a field of energy or consciousness. Therefore like the example used above, a change to one particle affects another. Now, we’ve also said the trick to getting what you want is to already have it – which is hard to believe when you are struggling to pay your bills or lonely because all your friends are coupled up and you’ve not had a date in two years. If you are focussing on what you don’t have you are creating a quantum entanglement that creates more of this. Now, nobody can think positive thoughts all the time – it’s impossible. What we can do however it to ‘entangle’ a positive one with our goal to bring in the change. It works like this:

First, pick a time you won’t be disturbed. Turn off your phone and get comfy. You can sit or lie down if you wish. Close your eyes. Relax. Decide what it is you want to ‘entangle’. Let’s say for example you want to attract a new relationship. Now, think back to a time when you were in a relationship and things were going well. Don’t focus on the person, focus on the way you were feeling. You may recall feelings of excitement, anticipation and feeling loved. Breathe these feelings in and let them infuse your whole being. Now, holding these wonderful feelings in your body allow yourself to visualise having these feelings again with someone new and at the same time expand your vision to include the person telling you they want to spend the rest of their lives with you. Imagine how you would feel setting up home together, getting engaged or married. Stay with the feeling and now merge all your feelings together – the feelings you had from a previous relationship with the feelings you will have in your new, committed relationship. Congratulations – you’ve just ‘entangled’!

By reliving emotionally a time when we had a version of what we want we overcome the barriers we create by concentrating on what we don’t have. The quantum entanglement meditation works because a bit like cosmic ordering we can now walk away and know the energy field that is the universe will respond. Also, have accessed these feelings from our past, whenever we find ourselves focussing on whatever it is we don’t have we can now go back and access our emotional state from the past which again alters our mindset reinforcing our entanglement process. Obviously to do this with money focus on a time when you could pay a bill immediately or make an expensive purchase without breaking the bank and ‘entangle’ this will a future vision of you enjoying financial security.

So, the trick to getting what you want is just in finding the time when you had a version of it and entangling it with a better vision for the future.

The Soul Drain. How Emotional Blockages Hold Us Back

It’s easy to de-clutter our closets but what about our internal wardrobe? Very often they are stuffed with old emotional clutter – feelings of guilt, inadequacy, rejection and old beliefs that keep us stuck and rooted in a past which no longer represents who we are or what we are capable of.  If you can’t find what you’re looking for in your wardrobe because it’s stuffed full of things you no longer need or even suit you – think of emotional clutter in the same way. It prevents you from seeing what is possible for you and to realise your potential.

Over the years, I’ve learned there are a few signs to look for that tell us we need an emotional de-clutter and what to do.

Relationships aren’t living up to your expectations. Do you wish your friend would take the initiative sometimes and suggest things for you to do together or that your partner should take out the rubbish without you having to nag them?  The problem with this one is that no matter how close we are to someone they are not mind readers. If you’re not verbalising what you need the other person has no idea they are messing up. Also, you are becoming so focussed on what they are not doing you are missing all the lovely things they do do for you! If there are no positives then perhaps it is time to let go with love and reclaim your life. We are all different and each of us has different expectation in love. If you are stuck in a pattern (same love making, watching TV every night at 8pm, same venue Friday night) do something different and this could shift the whole dynamic of your relationship and release the block!

What you ‘should’ do makes you miserable or resentful. Just as expecting that people close to you ‘should’ behave in a certain way if they love you, ‘should’ isn’t a good motivator for you either. Rather than bowing to ‘I should’, next time you feel you HAVE to do something but don’t want to – stop. Take a few moments to think about what you really want to do – and why. Then follow your own instincts when going forward.

You feel guilt or heartache every time you see that name in your contact list. Broken romances, relationships that ended on a sour note whether personal or professional, are sadly part of everyone’s life. The only thing that heals the pain of a severed soul connection is time and distance. So, do yourself a favour. Delete them from your contact list. Un-friend. Un-link. Un-follow. If the universe wants that person to return to be part of your soul path, they will. In the interim, you don’t need to know what they are up to if it reminds you of a past hurt.

Lastly – the big one.

You have uncompleted projects or steps you’ve not taken towards your goals.

Our goals are essential to living an authentic life. We have our dreams for a reason – they are clues to our soul purpose. Very often we start to take steps to realise those goals but fall by the wayside. When we fail to complete something that was a major step towards our goals we are left with nagging emotional guilt as well as possibly physical reminders of what we’ve failed to achieve – that half-finished manuscript, course materials for that extra qualification, the camera you’ve not picked up in months after deciding you were going to be a National Geographic photographer. If this sounds familiar then today – yes, TODAY, take some time out to make a list of your unfinished projects and goals. Then review these. Have any of your goals changed? Because often they do over time. If this is the case and this goal no longer has meaning for you, don’t be afraid to discard it. Be at peace with this decision. You’ve de-cluttered something major that was just hanging around draining your energy. Now set yourself a new goal that’s appropriate to who you’ve now become. If however, the project still infuses you with excitement and passion, it’s now time to work out ways to schedule it in – even if it’s just 10 minutes a day to start with. Small steps lead to big achievements.

Emotional clutter literally ‘clutters’ our way forward, blocking our path, draining our energy and preventing us from seeing the way to our goals. By following some simple steps to rid ourselves of emotional clutter we allow the abundant energy of the universe to flow freely again and clear the way towards living a more authentic, expressive life that reflects who we truly are.