Michele Knight's Blog, page 166
May 18, 2015
Rejection and how to deal with it.
Rejection is something we all face at some time or another. Whether it is rejection by a lover, rejection by a prospective employer, or even feeling that a group has rejected us as can happen in high school or even intrude into adult life. When it comes to rejection – nobody is immune. Almost every successful individual you meet has their own personal rejection story to tell. Surprisingly enough, rejection is not only part of our spiritual growth, but it can teach is valuable lessons if we are prepared to take the time to listen and not surrender to the perceived pain! When we are rejected, it tends to push a lot of buttons, our ego can go into crisis and depending on our relationship with ourselves and spirit, we can experience crushing emotions ranging from uselessness to feeling totally invalidated. Our image of ourselves as worthy of love, success, happiness – is destroyed. We see ourselves as failures, our power is taken from us, and we feel that there is no point in trying again.
Rejection has been a major life lesson for me which I have had to deal with from the very beginning. Many people on the spiritual path (and of course those who are not!) have suffered ridicule and rejection for being ‘different’ and usually, this is not helped by the fact that most people on this path are extremely sensitive. Being rejected hurts and the more it happens, the deeper the wound. However when we understand what rejection is and isn’t we are set free of the cycle of pain rejection carries.
When I was a small child, I was shunned for numerous reasons, for the fact my mother was Italian and could not speak proper English, that my brother was adopted and originally from Pakistan, that I was overweight, and because my father had died and we were poor, we dressed in old clothes or hand-me-downs. I was super-aware that I did not fit in and growing up, always felt I was on the outside looking in.
As my spiritual path broadened, I found myself asking not only whether I had done something to create this experience but also how this experience of rejection impacted on my future. Why does early rejection haunt us into our adult life?
When we are young, our brain forms powerful neural pathways from our early experiences and from that point on, we tend to view the world from that perspective. So, if we experience a lot of rejection at a young age, our brains will literally be ‘hard wired’ to expect rejection and each subsequent rejection reopens and adds to the wound. Because we expect rejection we unwittingly become for people who poke the wound! So, how do we overcome rejection? How do we shift our perspective from the disempowerment of rejection and reclaim ourselves?
As I got older, I learned the most powerful lesson that sometimes (and in my case always), rejection was a gift that led me towards the life and the people that were right for me. If you have suffered any trauma as a child, you can spend your life clinging onto any love that is shown to you even if it is abusive – in fact if it is abusive it feels familiar! During my early years, I doggedly clung onto lovers who were rude and abusive as it was familiar to me, and I justified it by thinking I could ‘heal their damage’ – it wasn’t them but their pain that was being so abusive, they were not to blame. However, deep down inside I clung to the thought that in some way I was not good enough and unlovable and deserved it. This is a pattern many empathetic people are familiar with, especially those who are able to spot similar patterns in other peoples relationships but blind to their own! The saying ‘healer heal thyself” springs to mind. You could say we are actually rejecting ourselves when we do this and the healing path is all about finding a way back to our undamaged self. When we KNOW we are lovable just as we are, and that we are good enough it breaks the spell. One of the worst rejections I ever experienced, was applying for a course I wasn’t accepted for. I only applied because deep down, I didn’t believe in myself – despite the fact that at 25 I was successful with my own office in Covent Garden. But I still felt the need to ‘fit in’. When the rejection arrived, I felt massive grief and pain but just two weeks later I got my big break in TV on Channel 5’s Housebusters. If I had been on the course my life would not have taken that direction so in this instance the rejection was a blessing in disguise!
A recent medical paper showed that lack of social support and rejection has a comparable health risk to smoking and high blood pressure and another study showed loneliness and rejection share some of the same neural pathways as physical pain! So, no wonder rejection hurts.
When we are happy we tend to see rejection less in the world around us and when we are isolated we can interpret the slightest look as a scathing rejection – it’s all about our focus.
5 Steps to Handle Rejection
1: Rejection is merely a stage towards ultimate success – one which everyone has to pass through to be successful!
2: If a lover, person or group rejects you – and in a way that is unkind, consider the fact they are doing you a favour. Do you really want people like this in your life?
3: Professionally, treat rejection as an information gathering exercise. Ask why you didn’t get the job. Information may emerge that helps you get the next one.
4: If someone is telling you that you are not good enough, they are usually talking about their own feelings of unworthiness – not yours. But it’s not your job to fix them.
5: Time puts rejection in a different light. The universe may have something better in mind for you. Chances are that rejection will turn into a blessing in disguise.
First published in Soul and Spirit Magazine
May 15, 2015
Ultimate guide to manifesting your desires.
As a child I firmly believed in magic and even though we were poor I held on to the belief that anything is possible. I was certain there was some ‘secret’ out there waiting to be discovered and once I found it, then the life I wanted would be mine. My first success at manifesting was when I wished on a dandelion for the chopper bike I desperately wanted. There seemed little chance of me getting one as back then my mother was working two jobs as a cleaner and a night nurse as well as her work as a psychic just to pay the mortgage after my father died. There just wasn’t enough money for essentials let alone a new bike. I remember visualising the chopper bike seeing myself riding through the local park as I blew on the dandelion seeds. I’d heard that if you did this your wish went straight up to heaven and would be answered. I put all my energy into it and then let it go, sure that it would arrive. Little did I know that this was exactly what I needed to do and I had tapped into what years later would be known as Cosmic Ordering. A few weeks later I woke up to a beautiful red chopper (the exact colour I wanted!) at the end of my bed! My mother bought it from a catalogue and paid it off every week for years but for me this was proof positive that magic did indeed exist!
I knew however that there was more to it than that. There had to be a way to become a beacon for our desires, magically drawing our dreams to us and living our lives fully in our soul power which in turn evolves the whole in ways that benefit not just us – but others too. I was now on a quest of discovery and from this Quantum Creating was born.
Quantum Creating is a fusion of both ancient spiritual wisdom and Quantum physics which at their heart say the same thing: we are all connected and what we think of as ‘reality’ is in fact nothing but energy vibrating at different frequencies. To give a simple idea of how this works – your body is not solid matter. There is more empty ‘space’ between the atoms that make it up than there are solid particles. The ‘vibration’ frequency of which gives the illusion you are solid – but you are in fact an energy being and a divine shard of the universe. In fact, we are all just reflections of the universe according to many theories – which tie in with the Buddhist belief that life is just a dream!
So, the fact we are beings of energy is at the heart of Quantum Creating. Change the frequency of your energy and you will change not only what you attract, but the speed at which you can attract it. Because we are all connected, as you evolve, you evolve the whole. How do we change our energy frequency to become Quantum Creators in our own lives? It’s easier than you think!
Step One: Awaken to Who You Really Are – A Unique Soul
You are a unique shard of God, the Universe or whatever label you would like to call it. No one can take your place and without you endless synchronicities and events would not happen. You are so powerful that just by walking down the street you can change someone’s life forever. Strings of coincidences would not happen if you were not here. Your unique ‘vibration’ creates ripples of energy which touches and teaches others. We are all in a sacred dance and each action has a reaction. Your energy effects everything and is the very thing that gives you the power to create. Equally other people effect you in the same way You can’t separate your power from you uniqueness as your uniqueness is your power. The first step to Quantum Creating is to go within and remember who you are. To find your inner voice, to be fearless in expressing your unique self. Most importantly it is not a selfish process but about helping others, when we help others achieve their dream we not only change the vibration of the Universe but we draw more potential towards us. We are, after all, all one on some level.
Step Two: Have a Meme Detox
Ideas and words are like spells. The best inspire us. The worse keep us trapped and limited. How many ideas and beliefs do you carry around that are either a) not your own but handed down by parents, teachers, friends, family, your boss, the media or b) negative self-limiting beliefs about who you are and what you are capable of? These thoughts are what affect your energy and your power to attract what you want. When you know who you are, you cannot be limited by someone else’s beliefs. Ideas are like a virus and are catching (can’t get the birdy song out of your head? It’s a meme!) Take an inventory of your ideas each week to make sure you have not become infected by someone else’s ideas! What you think and believe is what you create.
Step Three: Connect and Give Back
If you’ve followed steps one and two you are now a beacon for your desires sending our a clear calling signal out across the universe for what you want to attract. And when you’ve done that – give back with random acts of kindness and help wherever you can. There’s so much truth in the saying ‘What goes around comes around’. You now know you can change not only your own life – but those of others – just by being your authentic self with the power of Quantum Creating a true touch of manifestation magic thrown in!
Ultimate guide to connecting with your spirit guide
You probably already know a fair bit about spirit guides. Even if you’ve not yet begun the process of connecting to yours, most of us at some time or another have felt that someone has been ‘looking out for us’ on some level. Perhaps you felt someone was literally ‘speaking to you’ – urging you to go down a certain path or make a certain decision. Or you might have felt a presence on occasion that was there to reassure and guide you. The fact is we all have spirit guides whether we are aware of them or not and they are literally the ultimate spiritual entourage or resource that accompanies us through this life.
Spirit guides come in many forms. They may be a deceased relative, someone you have known in a past life, the spirit of someone who has accumulated a lot of wisdom over many lifetimes or even an animal or a being from another dimension! No matter what form they take, they are here to work with us to discover our soul path and to evolve spiritually. Some guides may have very specific roles in your life, while others may just be there to provide love and support. The main thing to remember is that we are never going through life alone. Our guides are always there with us. In the film “What dreams may come” with the late Robin Williams we are shown a guide who appears as someone but is really someone else. Our guides show up as what we expect which is why so many people have Native American guides, it can be symbolic of the energy.
I will never forget the amazing sense of connection and empowerment I felt when I first connected to one of my spirit guides. The huge cave woman in front of me felt thousands of years old and exuded a profound feeling of ancient wisdom and above all – feminine power. I felt awe just to be in her presence but at the same time the overwhelming feeling of love. Although she didn’t utter a single word to me, I could feel a deep connection to her. She did laugh however and the sound of her laugher reverberated deep in my soul and seemed to me to be the wisest and most loving thing I’d ever heard! I don’t know if she was a wise woman, a shaman or ancient priestess, one of my ancestors, a representation of the divine feminine or even me in a past life, but I do know that the feeling of understanding, all-encompassing love and acceptance I felt from her, as well as a deep sense of power and peace, made me realise I have always been guided and protected by her – even when I didn’t realise it!
If you’ve not connected with any of your guides yet, the first thing you need to do before starting is to let go of any preconceptions about who or even what your guide will be. Many people have Native American guides, other people angelic beings; some people discover their guide is from an ancient civilisation such as Egypt or even Atlantis, while many, many guides are in fact ordinary people who have passed over but whose job it now is to offer support to us in-between their own incarnations. Bear in mind that there’s no hierarchy of guides – having a Native American spirit guide isn’t ‘better’ than discovering your guide was a sailor or a shop assistant in their past life. The important thing is to understand your guide has wisdom to give you and to be open to connecting with the guide that is right for you at this moment in time.
When you are ready, set aside some time and make sure you won’t be disturbed. Turn off or unplug your phone. Sit somewhere comfortable but don’t lie down otherwise you might fall asleep. Close your eyes, take few deep breaths and as you breathe out imagine you are not only relaxing your body but ready to meet with the guide who has the most to teach you right now.
Imagine yourself in a beautiful outdoor surrounding – this can be anywhere from a lovely garden, to a beach, forest or by a lake, river or stream. This can even be somewhere familiar to you where you feel at peace and at one with nature. Feel the Sun on your skin, the breeze and hear the lap of the waves on the shore or the sound of wind in the trees. This is a place of perfect serenity. Now, ask your spirit guide to join you here today.
Watch as your guide approaches. Are they male or female? Old or young? How are they dressed? Are they even human? Be open as to what your guide will look like but know that this guide is the one who is the most appropriate guide for where you are in your life right now. Talk to your guide and ask them any questions you might have. Do they speak or are you answered telepathically? You can ask them questions about who they were and also what advice they have for you. Think of your guide as your soul life coach – here to help us fulfil our purpose for being here. But also bear in mind that issues we consider to be important – such as will a relationship work out for us, are often not important to our guides and neither will they answer them as they are concerned with the soul which often has a different agenda. The best kinds of questions for guides are always ‘What do I need to know?’ and ‘Am I fulfilling my soul purpose?’
When you are finished, thank your guide not just for joining you today, but for their continued support and presence on your journey and say goodbye. Feel yourself slowly returning to the room and open your eyes. Write down as much information as you can while it is still fresh in your mind.
Now you have seen your spirit guide in person, this can help you forge a stronger relationship with them. They are a touchstone, a soul resource for us and always with us, no matter what we do or where we go!
Michele’s Word:
Remember: Your guides are not there to live your life for you or to make your decisions. Your journey is yours and yours alone. Hence the term ‘guide’. They are there to advise you on matters of the soul – not what you should do next as in ‘Should apply for that job or this one?’ or to ask them about your future. However, sometimes they may volunteer this information without you asking. A guide is there to connect us to love and our higher good. If a guide ever tells you to do something that might harm you or others, you need to consult a doctor or medical professional.
May 11, 2015
May 9, 2015
5 ways we give away our power and how to get it back.
The life that you create is a reflection of the power that you are able to use. As you are already a part of the whole and a shard of the divine, you already have all the power you need – but we can give it away, often without meaning to. Becoming conscious about how we can give our power away means that we can make choices about how to hold on to it so that we can use it for better things.
So how do we give our power away?
1/ Decide that’s it. Telling yourself that there is nothing more for you to discover, learn, or even be amazed by is a shortcut to closing yourself down to new experiences and input that can make your life here a fantastic and fascinating rich experience. Along with that goes trying to hypnotise yourself into believing that whatever circumstance you’re in can’t change. Change is one of the few things you can be absolutely certain about and believe it or not you do have unlimited choices for change. Embrace the power of change!
2/ Convince yourself that any one thing, person or experience is Your All. Life is an incredible journey throughout which you will meet many amazing souls and have more fabulous experiences than you could possibly sit down and count at one sitting. When you are in your power, you hold on to a deep gratitude, reverence and joy for the experience of everything, but when you make any one thing your absolute all, you give it a false weighting of importance in the balance of your experience. This is your life, your journey, and you can give everything your best without handing over everything to one person or experience. Know there is more beauty to come.
3/ Care more about what other people think than what you think. Every single person that you meet throughout life arrives to teach you something. We can exchange views, connections, opinions and experiences, but we need to hold ourselves at the centre of all of that. When we give other people the power to decide whether or not we are talented, worthy, beautiful, smart or deserving, we erode our own power. When we follow what someone else tells us we should do and override what we think or intuitively know is right for us, we get off course. Follow your heart and know you are equal to all people as we are all one, no one is better than you and you are lovable exactly as you are.
4/ Give up on your dreams. It doesn’t matter whether you want to invent a new device or adore singing, your dreams are part of what make you unique and add passion and juice to your existence. Sometimes our dreams have to go on the backburner of our lives for a while whilst we focus on something else, but we should keep their fires lit, check in every so often to work out whether there isn’t something else we could do to keep them ticking over or do you want a different dream now? Our dreams are achievable and fluid. We also have unlimited opportunity to embrace and create new dreams.
5/ Forget the basics. Eat well, sleep enough, drink water and exercise. Your body is an amazing and complex thing and does extraordinary things for you all day every day. Treat it with reverence and respect and it will do a lot more for a lot longer. Because our mind and body are connected, you can’t think at your best when you are treating yourself at your worst. I’d also throw meditation into the bare minimum mix because there is so much good to be said for it and you can do it whilst you’re waiting for a bus, so no excuse for not having time!
You have more power than you can possibly know and in each moment you can step into that power.
May 7, 2015
Numerology for those born on the 18th and 27th
Numerology – Secrets of Your Birthday – Soul Power Information for those born on the 18thor 27th day of any month
If you were born on the 18thor 27th day of any month you should have already read the section which governs your Life Path Master Number which is a 9. However, those of you born under ‘double digits’ which reduce down to an 9 have the additional influence of your double number which reveals information about your Soul Power and Soul Path. So, if your birthday falls on either the 18thor 27th – read on.
Soul Power Number 18
If you look at the Tarot card of The Moon you will begin to understand your birth date. Look closely at the card and you will see a crayfish emerging from the water. The water represents all you have experienced in this life, all your memories, challenges, trails and tribulations. You may have had times where you loved and lost, tried and failed or become too afraid to continue or got side tracked. However, you can emerge from this as the crayfish is doing.
Very often if you are born under an 18 you are your own worst enemy. You can be beset by fears – the card of The Moon rules our dreams and imagination and don’t forget, our imagination can come up with brilliant ideas but also fears that hold us back. The message here is that although you may think wolves are howling at your door – they are not real. To succeed in life you need to focus on the next step on the road ahead. Just one step at a time. If you do this, you will succeed and free yourself of any restrictions that hold you back whether they are self-imposed fears or otherwise. Develop your courage and confidence as both these can be lacking. There are hidden forces at work in your life but this doesn’t mean you should be afraid of taking a chance. You are highly sensitive and can become easily upset and sometimes when this happens you are unable to think straight. You need to take time out especially from making big decisions when you get like this. Read uplifting books, listen to music and meditate if you can.
This number indicates divorce and separations – and this can be from family and friends as well as partners. Learn to be open about your feelings as sometimes your sensitivity and fears mean you can be hurt where no hurt is intended by the other party. If you learn to share your inner fears with those closest to you, you will not only prevent unnecessary separations and personal suffering, but you will get the emotional reassurance you need.
Soul Power Number 27
One of the most fortunate birth numbers, 27 blesses those born under it with ‘abundant grace’. Naturally this does not mean you won’t face some challenges on life’s path but what it does mean is that success is guaranteed in the end as this is another number of karmic reward. If you were born on the 27th you have been rewarded with a keen mind and amazing intellect and this is what you are here to use. You will get the most benefits by focussing your intellect on one thing at a time. Yours is the number of the specialist in some kind of endeavour. If you believe in yourself and if you apply your mind, you will rise to the very top of whatever field you choose and you will receive all the rewards that go with that. Chances are as a child you were a keen student and excited about what you were learning. If you’ve lost your soul path (rare for a 27 but it can happen!), look back at the subject that excited you most at school and focus on that as that is your path.
When you achieve success, which you will, please don’t rest on your laurels. Yours is the number of the trailblazer so treat any success as just another milestone – and then set off towards the next one filled with confidence in your ability to achieve your goals. You can make learning and achieving a lifetime commitment and you are likely to continue to increase your knowledge and experience long after others would have retired. Once you have found your path it won’t seem like work at all, just what you live to do and while you are alive you will continue to do it.
