Shannon Ables's Blog, page 329
June 3, 2015
Word of the Week: No. 5
Click for pronunciation
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WORDS OF THE WEEK FROM THE ARCHIVES:
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June 2, 2015
Outfit of the Week: Net-a-Porter Sale Ensemble
~Chloe Denim Shorts (30% off)~
~T by Alexander Wang Cotton Twill Shirt (40% off) similar here~
~MiH stripe shirt (50% off)~
~Tory Burch Paloma leather and linen wedge sandals (50%) or Miu Miu suede and wood wedge (30% off) or Paul Andrew Hampton python espadrille wedge~
~Marc by Marc Jacobs Sally textured leather shoulder bag (30% off)~
~Kenneth Jay Lane embossed gold-plate ring (50% off)~
~Marc by Marc Jacobs orbit gold-tone earrings~
~SHOP THE OUTFIT:
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Style Inspiration: Sand and Cement Style
The transition from work to vacation is here, and that means maxi dresses, sun hats, sunglasses and sandals. However, we can’t camp out at the beach all summer (although it would be lovely to do so, wouldn’t it?) as work, real life and our pocketbooks need us to hit the pavement every so often. So today, indulge in style inspiration for both destinations. I must say, my favorite this week is the turquoise halter-neck maxi dress. The hue is stunning.
~STYLE INSPIRATION POSTS FROM THE ARCHIVES:
Images: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (brown sandal wedges) (10) (11) (12) (13)
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June 1, 2015
8 Ways to Become the CEO of Your Own Life
“Women have never had so many options. Yet we often experience a kind of paralysis, an unconscious willingness to follow societal dictates rather than become the CEOs of our own lives. When we mindlessly follow the dots, we smother our innate gifts and miss opportunities to fulfill our true potential.” -Shannon Ables, Choosing the Simply Luxurious Life: A Modern Woman’s Guide
The Simple Sophisticate, episode #40
Being the head of any company, no matter how successful, can be exhausting, demanding and emotionally taxing as the primary decisions and direction of where a company is going rests squarely on the CEO’s shoulders. However, much like Apple, OWN or Berkshire Hathaway, each of these companies have been successful, and at the helm for the entire time, or the nearly the entire time, one person has manned the rudder. All three of these CEOs started from nothing; all three of them had tumultuous times, but all three, due to their tenacity, clear vision and dogged work ethic, have been and still are very successful.
How we go about each of our lives is not that much different from how a company is run. Each life has the potential for success or catastrophe depending upon how it is managed. Choosing to take the director’s seat (apologies for mixing metaphors) can be daunting, intimidating and frightening because if success isn’t attained, all the responsibility falls back to the top dog; however, if success materializes, we will be able to pat ourselves on the back.
Much like predicting the stock market’s ebbs and flows, life too is unpredictable, but if you choose to incorporate these eight components into your life’s mission statement as CEO, you will indeed be more likely to soar with the eagles than remain on the ground.
1. Look Beyond Others’ Approval
Having just wrapped up teaching the novel To Kill a Mockingbird, one of the activities I include in my end of the unit lessons incorporates psychologist Lawrence Kohlberg’s Ideas of Moral Reasoning. Including six levels, he describes that each of us makes decisions depending upon one of these six levels depending upon how morally developed we have become. Placement is fluid as we can swift based on maturity and experience, but the primary reason we should each aspire to let go of what others think is because it is beneath us and will hinder our overall fulfillment in life.
Seeking self-approval is number three on the levels of moral reasoning, and in contrast, the highest level is to follow a set of self-formulated principles that aspires to see beyond popular or legal dictates, but rather determine what is best for society worldwide. It indeed takes a strong person to establish and then follow through on such an elevated way of approaching life, but much like Atticus (who is indeed defined as having reached this top level), it is worth it.
Attaining the sixth level takes time, self-reflection and inner courage. An example that always comes to mind is the idea of choosing to have children. Society, in many ways still expects, either consciously or unconsciously for women to desire to have children, and if such a choice is not made, many will jump to conclusions. In Selfish, Shallow, and Self-Absorbed: Sixteen Writers on the Decision Not to Have Kids by Meghan Daum, each writer reveals though their narration that being selfish, shallow and self-absorbed is actually the furthest from the truth when it comes to describing such individuals who have the inner courage to follow their own self-formualted set of principles.
Whether one chooses to have child or not, marry or not, pursue a particular career or not, should only be because they find it to be in alignment with their path, their talents, their passions instead of simply following the crowd. The example above is merely to point out, that if your path isn’t the one society is used to seeing, you may have to muster of your gumption, but it will at times to difficult. But rest assured, if you know it to be the best path for you, the approval from others will be the furthest from your mind.
A truly fulfilling life can only materialize if we choose the life we are living for ourselves. So rather than seeking others’ approval, seek first your own approval and have the courage to follow through.
2. Pursue Your Path With Determination
“If you’re frustrated because you’re not getting what you want, stop for a second: Have you actually flat-out asked for it. If if you haven’t, stop complaining. You can’t expect the world to read your mind. You have to put it out there . . . ” -Sophia Amoruso, #GIRLBOSS
It has been my experience that very few things worth having, experiencing or being involved with, happen with the snap of the fingers. Rather, life often wants to assess how badly we desire something, be it a job, a new life, or a relationship. And while it may seem that life is shutting the door on our dreams, I’ve never found the door to be locked if it is indeed something that is possible. Life merely wants to know if we indeed want it as much as we say we do, in other words, continue to knock.
Ultimately, we each have to know what we want in order to pursue it and attain it. And once we know what we want, pursue it without relenting. Showing such determination will eventually be rewarded.
3. Care For Your Temple Regularly
In order to do our best, be productive and be able to evolve into the person we are confident we can become, we must care for our bodies, internal, externally and mentally, on a regular basis. Adhering to a regular workout routine, practicing regular mind mastery techniques (meditation), and tending to our beauty regimen is not an effort in vanity, rather an approach that will allow us to perform our best, as well as feel our best, so that we can forget about what our body, mind and physical appearance is and simply go about our job.
In a recent Huffington Post article, the writer compares this tending to the body as sharpening the saw. Spending additional time caring for our bodies is much like sharpening a saw. If we come to the forest with the sharpest utensil in the group, we will slice through the tree trunk in mere minutes, while a dull blade that has not been tended to may start out the quickest, but will take hours to complete. Take the time, regularly, to take care of the only vessel that can make your dreams a reality – your whole being.
4. Mastery of Your Mind
“But there’s also the everyday kind of magic that we make for ourselves. And that’s really not magic at all. It’s just recognizing the fact that we control our thoughts and our thoughts control our lives.” -Sophia Amoruso
As mentioned in #3, tending to our mind, becoming the master of it, is crucial to success. In fact, not tending to our mental strength can diminish our chances as Sophia Amoruso points out,“I also think you can end up ignoring, and even losing, the positive things in your life by focusing too much on the negative.” (Click here for episode #20 – How to Master Your Mind)
The reality we create in our minds is often what will materialize in the world we live in. So what do you want to see in the near future? Have the strength and the tenacity to boot out the bad, and usher in the good. “You have to kick people out of your head as forcefully as you’d kick someone out of your house if you didn’t want them to be there.” -Sophia Amoruso
5. Respect the Power of Money
“Money spells freedom. If you learn to control your finances, you won’t find yourself stuck in jobs, places, or relationships that you hate just because you can’t afford to go elsewhere.” – Sophia Amoruso
Most of us start off with little, but it is how we care for the money we are given and earn as we start to build our financial foundation that will determine if we will be successful in the long run. Those who turn up their noses at earning money, either don’t know how to do it or don’t understand the power it yields. And so long as the power is used for good, the life you will create will be amazing. Click here to discover TSLL Money archived posts or read Chapter 3 of my book to become the master of your finances.
“There is no dignity quite so impressive, and no independence quite so important, as living within your means.” -Calvin Coolidge
6. Know How to Market Yourself
Whether you want to be an entrepreneur or not, we each will be on the hunt for a job at some point, and the key is to know how to sell ourselves successfully to attain the career we seek. In #GIRLBOSS, Amoruso shares in detail tips and tricks on how to write a successful cover letter, resume, give a winning interview and work effectively in the company. Tune into today’s episode of the podcast to hear a handful of tips I have learned along the way as well.
7. Become an Effective Communicator
Two of the most important factors in becoming an effective communicator are being strong enough to be authentic and knowing our audience. While we will tend to make mistakes along the way, so long as we are doing our best, choosing to be honest so as not to manipulate or deceive, our approach will be met with respect. People may not always like what we have to say, but they will come to trust that we have to say is dependable.
Whether in our personal or professional lives, being an active participant when it comes to communication will reap far more success than being passive and assuming others know what we want. Part of the reason there are so few effective communicators is because it is not easy. It takes strength, knowledge of the subject matter and control of one’s emotions, to effectively convey what we want to those involved in the colloquy. But with anything, so long as you we are each willing practice, learn from our previous missteps, and try again, we will improve.
8. Redefine Failure
“It is she who listens to the rest of the world who fails, and it is she who has enough confidence to define success and failure for herself who succeeds.” – Sophia Amoruso
The only way to be successful is to risk what many define as failure. But here’s the catch, it is never really failure, so long as there is a lesson to be learned from the experience. And the good news is that there will always be something to learn. Keep applying the lessons, refuse to allow others’ definition of what success is be swapped for what you know to be success for you. After all, we are each on our own journey. Even reaching the same peak for one person could have taken years, while for the next climber it could have taken only a few days. Never allow others’ evaluations of what you have done to be your barometer for success. So long as you know you’ve done your best, so long as you refuse to not be stay defeated, you will be successful.
At the heart of living a simply luxurious life is finding the courage within yourself to live life on your own terms. While we all must learn how to interact effectively with each others, communicate and work in such a way to think of the community and society as a whole, when it comes to the decisions we make, we must spend our entire lives with ourselves. TSLL blog, The Simple Sophisticate podcast and the book provide the framework so that you will have a sound foundation and clear direction about how to achieve a life of contentment, but you are the artist, the designer. Your house will look like nobody else’s, and that is the beauty. Enjoy the journey and be brave.
~POSTS FROM THE ARCHIVES YOU MIGHT ENJOY:
~The 8 Pillars of Building a Simply Luxurious Life
~6 Ways to Find Your Authentic Path
~How to Be the Master of Your Mind
Petit Plaisir
~Romantics Anonymous (2010), French film, subtitles in English
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May 29, 2015
This & That: No. 160
App
~NetSet
If you are a particular shopper who is inspired by what you see on social media, or are more likely to decide your next outfit by the experiences and sights you see in your day-to-day life, Net-a-Porter‘s new app, NetSet, may be just for you. Have a look at the video to discover how finding exactly what you want can be right at your fingertips.
Book
~The French Beauty Solution: Time-Tested Secrets to Look and Feel Beautiful Inside and Out by Mathilde Thomas
While you will have to wait until July 14th, you might just want to put Mathilde Thomas’ book on your wish list. As cofounder of the international cosmetic company Caudalíe, Thomas shares her experiences of growing up in Paris combined with her successful venture into the beauty industry. To further reveal the knowledge of the French when it comes to beauty, she compares the different approaches of their American counterparts to reveal how one’s beauty regimen should be something to luxuriate in and be done consistently to act as a preventative measure, rather than a reparative approach.
Included in the book are many all natural suggestions such as honey and oil to wash your face, and advice on what foods to eat for healthier skin, hair and nails. You better believe, it will be on my summer reading list this season. Enjoy!
~The Red Notebook by Antoine Laurain
When TSLL reader, Kelly, suggested I take a look at Antoine Laurain’s The Red Notebook, I took a moment to check it out. And upon recently doing so, I immediately put it in my shopping cart. Scheduled to arrive this weekend, I am eager to dive into this cozy mystery of a handbag left behind with a red notebook full of thoughts and jottings that intrigues the finder to take on the task of solving the mystery of the owner. The writer of several other similar tales, if you want a light-hearted read, you may have just found your next favorite author.
~The Upside of Stress: Why Stress is Good for You, and How to Get Good At It by Kelly Gonigal
Stronger, smarter and happier. Such descriptors probably don’t come to mind when we think of the effects of stress, but according to Stanford psychologist Kelly Gonigal, it is possible with careful attention. With the help of science, stories and exercises, Gonigal offers inspiring advice to best deal with the stress that is already in our lives.
~The Umbrian Thursday Night Supper Club by Marlena de Blasi
While searching for The Red Notebook mentioned above, I came across this lovely title that has been likened by reviewers to Under the Tuscan Sun and Eat, Pray, Love. As the title hints, each Thursday, a group of women gather in Italy’s Orvieto, for a meal I can only imagine will make your tastebuds envious, to share stories about their lives. Scheduled to be released in the US in November, it is already available in Europe and the UK here.
Shopping
~The Nudes by Donna Karan
A reader recently asked for my thoughts on stockings – to wear or not to wear – and while currently I don’t wear pantyhose, I know they are more likely to be worn than not. In fact, it was Kate Middleton (the Duchess of Cambridge) who stylishly reminded the public that they can be worn and worn well. The Wall Street Journal‘s style section recently addressed this question, and one of the most sought after brands is Donna Karan’s The Nudes. Available in four different shades, they are sheer enough that you see the woman’s leg, but offer just enough coverage to smooth the appearance of the skin’s tone.
~recipe for Fried Mozzarella and Carmelized Peach Caprese Burger~
The weekend has arrived and with it absolutely gorgeous weather. To stroll on the beach may be out of the question for me at the moment, but to take some time to enjoy a delicious meal like the one above is not. Summer time means time to slow down, savor, relax and let go a little bit more, and that is what I am most looking forward to. Today’s This & That is full of books to read for such leisurely moments this season, as that is one of my absolute favorite pastimes.
On a blog business note, many of you have emailed me to let me know that the daily email subscription service, as well as the App, are not being updated with new blog posts or you are not receiving the posts in your email. The good news is I am aware of this hiccup and in even better news, I am currently working with my web designer to rectify the situation. Hopefully sooner rather than later you will see the subscription working again. My apologies for this inconvenience, but please know the blog has continued to post as it regularly does, so in the meantime, you can simply stop by and see what is going on: Cannes’ Film Festival Red Carpet favorites, a sunny Outfit of the Week and the Similarities between Dating and Selling a Home were discussed earlier this week.
Now to the weekend, two days of relaxation, travel or play. Whatever is on your schedule, enjoy. And until Monday bon weekend!
~Fascinating and very true – The Four Stages of Life
~29 Food Rules We Can Learn from the French . . . wise words
~5 Simple Questions that Will Make You 5 Times More Successful
~Traveling to Paris? The New York Times offers frugal ways to enjoy the City of Light
And be sure to check out TSLL’s New Weekly Finds in the right-hand column as Net-a-Porter’s semi-annual sale has begun and the discounts are steep.
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May 28, 2015
Thoughts from the Editor: Cannes Red Carpet 2015
The 2015 Cannes Film Festival recently concluded this past Sunday, but not without a bevy of beautiful designs and a dash of controversy . . . albeit about shoes, but at such a coveted red carpet to attend, it indeed was a headline worthy, no? Actually, Cannes’ director denied the report that high heels were a requirement, but that didn’t silence the presses.
Emily Blunt (seen above in Stella McCartney), evidentially was quite vocal and in support of the women who were turned away at the entrance for wearing bejeweled flats, even going so far as to admit, “Everyone should wear flats, to be honest. We shouldn’t wear high heels.”
New York Times journalist Elizabeth Semmelhack, in her column this past weekend, took the opportunity to refresh readers of the history the heel, and how one’s choice of shoe does not determine one’s power in society. A shoe is simply a shoe.
While indeed wearing heels is a treat, I can remember far too many times when I feet were in dire pain; however, the silhouette, the elongation that occurred was too tempting. Does a woman become more of an object, a play thing, one to be taken less seriously because she opts for height and allure? How preposterous! Rather, it is one’s choice to have fun with fashion, but one should never feel forced to wear a shoe that isn’t to their taste.
If indeed Shoegate is a true tale to arise out of the past two weeks in Cannes, that is unfortunate. One’s shoe choice should not be dictated by another (unless you are wearing a loaned dress of a designer that has an expectation of presentation, are in the heart of your publicity tour and your stylist insists). Otherwise, to wear a heel or not is completely up to the person who must walk in them.
Shoes aside, the red carpet was stunning. And I must admit of all of the red carpets throughout the awards season, the Cannes Film Festival extravaganza is my favorite as it offers classic, regal, yet chic and feminine designs. No one plays it too safe, but no one wears a shock-and-awe ensemble either. Have a look at more than a few of my favorites.
~Marion Cottilard in Dior Haute Couture~
~in Dior~
~Jourdan Dunn in Ralph & Russo~
~Chanel Iman in Donna Karan~
~Kendall Jenner in Azzedine Alaïai~
~Zhou Yun in Elie Saab~
~Shu Qi in Elie Saab~
~Naomi Watts in Elie Saab~
~in Armani Prive~
~in Ralph Lauren~
~Ines de la Fressange~
~Karlie Kloss in Tom Ford~
~in Versace~
~Rachel Weisz in Prada~
~in Narcisco Rodriquez~
~in Louis Vuitton~
~Natalie Portman in Rodarte~
~in Dior~
~in Lanvin~
~in Dior Haute Couture~
~Julianne Moore in Armani Prive~
~Daria Strokous in Luisa Beccaria~
~Rooney Mara in Alexander McQueen~
~Salma Hayek in Gucci~
~Lupita Nyong’o in Gucci~
~Charlize Theron in Dior~
~Cate Blanchett in Giles~
~Blanchett & Mooney in Rochas~
~in Armani Privé~
Images: NYTimes, & style.com
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May 27, 2015
Good Grammar Is . . . : Lie vs. Lay
~ENGLISH CLASSROOM POSTS FROM THE ARCHIVES:
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May 26, 2015
Outfit of the Week: Spring to Summer Options
~DVF Davi Chiffon Blouse (other colors available)~
~Gucci Candy ankle strap sandals~
~Anthropologie Janna Maxham Nitecap Straw Clutch~
~SHOP THE OUTFIT:
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May 11, 2015
The Truth Behind “It Was Meant To Be”
~The Simple Sophisticate, episode #37
When it comes to turning dreams into reality, versus sitting back and letting fate take the wheel, the truth behind the saying, “It was meant to be” is missing a whole lot of context. First of all, never give the wheel to an unknown driver, and second of all, be willing to master what is in your control and let go of what you cannot.
If we are ever to have any say in our lives and the path they venture along, we must become aware of the power we possess and harness it. To let life simply occur around us is to waste our precious gifts and talents. While we may not know when or how certain success or life events will happen, rest assured, if you incorporate the seven truths I am going to share with you today into your life, you will find great success and happiness.
~A detailed discussion of each point listed below is discussed on the podcast.
1. Put Yourself in the Arena
~Daring Greatly: How the Courage to be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent and Lead by Brene Brown
2. Come Prepared
3. Accept the Unknown
4. See Past Self-Imposed or Society-Imposed Limitations
5. Refuse to be Discouraged When Initial Attempts Fail
6. Take the Time to Reflect and Connect the Dots After Success has Occurred
7. Get Ready to Say Yes
~Petit Plaisir
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May 8, 2015
This & That: No. 157
Book
~Leave your Mark: Land Your Dream Job. Kill It in Your Career. Rock Social Media by Aliza Licht
Described as 288 pages of mentoring as you navigate the path toward your career goals in the twentieth century, Aliza Licht is the PR guru for Donna Karan. Nicknamed the “Reigning Queen of Social Media” by Women’s Wear Daily, Licht offers advice for anyone just getting started as well as anyone well on their way into their career. Just released this past Monday, ideal as a graduate present or for yourself as you gather up the gumption to keep striving forward, this should be a great read.
~Where You Go Is Not Who You’ll Be: An Antidote to the College Admissions Mania by Frank Bruni
One of The New York Times columnists that I regularly find myself reading and enjoying is Frank Bruni. With a niece who was beginning to navigate the exhausting and at times overwhelming process of choosing a college and managing the price tag, Bruni decided to dive into research to answer a question: Does where you go determine your success in your chosen field? With numerous surveys and statistics, he comes to the realization that no, the Ivy Leagues do not have a monopoly on success. With spring comes graduation and a brand new beginning, perhaps this book will offer a reason to relax and refuse to over-extend oneself with student loans simply to acquire a particular name on a transcript.
Museum
~Whitney Museum of American Art
On May 1st, The Whitney officially became open to the public at its new location in the Meatpacking District at 99 Gansevoort Street after having originally been located on the Upper East Side. Dedicated to 20th and 21st century American art, it was originally founded in 1931 by Gertrude Vanderbilt Whitney. Right next to Diane von Furstenberg’s flagship shop in NYC, I have a feeling I will be popping in this summer on my trip to the city in June. And I will be sure to take you along with me. Open from 10:30 am to 10pm daily, experience a new locale, art created by 3,000 artists and more than 21,000 paintings, sculptures, drawings, and new media.
Shopping
~Citizen Eco-Drive Silhouette Bangle watch
An accessory worth investing in is without a doubt a watch (or two). And as someone who has gradually begun to do this, the only hiccup is having to replace the battery every few years. As someone who prefers simplicity, but has a predilection for beauty, when I was introduced to Citizen’s Eco-Drive watches, I immediately became a fan. First of all, they have a battery which is charged by being exposed to light that will last 40 years. Yes, you heard me correctly. No more frequent trips to replace the battery. And secondly, the Silhouette Bangle blends function with sleek beauty.
Given this exact watch, I was immediately impressed and smitten with its design. Available in silver/black as well, such a watch would make an ideal gift for someone special – one’s mother perhaps? Or maybe a graduate? After all, while yes, most of our cell phones have become our sense of time, having a beautiful accessory that keeps us pulled together and never lets us down, is an option worth exploring.
~Iris & Ink Mid-Rise White Skinny Jeans
Spring is here and summer is right around the corner, and that means a quality pair of white denim is a capsule wardrobe stable to have on hand. At a very reasonable price, The Outnet‘s exclusive line – Iris & Ink – offers a stretch-denim pair of ankle skimming jeans in every size available. Put on your wishlist or purchase today and be set for a variety of casual or elevated style.
Television
~Grace & Frankie on Netflix
Premiering today (Friday) on Netflix, Grace & Frankie is the much anticipated comedy created by FRIENDS alum Marta Kauffman. Starring Lily Tomlin and Jane Fonda, each woman learns their respective husbands have fallen in love with . . . each other. Each woman deals with it in her own way, but the tone is quite humorous. Along the way, the two develop an unmatchable bond that carries the series. With each of the four main stars with parts created by Aaron Sorkin to their credit, Sam Waterston (Law & Order) and Martin Sheen (The West Wing), round out the cast. I will admit, I am tuning in most definitely.
~recipe for Cinnamon Swirl Loaf~
Here in the states, Mother Day will be celebrated Sunday and that means, I will be spending time with mine. Perhaps a stroll or walk through her garden, maybe an afternoon respite to sip tea or wine and just catch up. Wherever our time takes us, I am simply looking forward to leisurely downtime with a woman I am fortunate to call my mom.
This week on the blog has been busy, but deliciously wonderful. With a big announcement shared to gawking at the stunning styles on the red carpet at the Met Gala, I am ready to catch my breath and sleep in. Pair the above bedroom with some delicious nibbles such as the one above, and I will be a very happy girl.
This weekend I have ample reading options that I think you might enjoy. Have a look, and until Monday, bon week-end!
~I have just discovered this lovely decor blog, and if this post is any indication, it will one to visit on a regular basis.
~A light-hearted post on words that have gone by the wayside, but oh, how interesting they are.
~I’ve always been an advocate of regular alone time, and this article is speaking my language.
~26 Ways to be a wonderful friend . . .
~A tremendous thank you to Christy Linens for introducing me to their readers. Did you know? Save 25% off your first purchase with promo code LUX25. Offer runs through May 15th. (Here’s a peek as to how I’ve fallen in love with their luxurious bed linens.)
~Strawberries will soon be in season, and this recipe will be one to try.
~The best pastime to relinquish – worrying about what others think of you. How to bring it to a halt.
~A health article worth reading – eliminate these to improve your weight and more importantly, your health.
~Fellow travelers to Paris – 12 apps that will simplify your itinerary.
~A beautiful letter from Garance Dore to her younger self.
~Anna Wintour dabbles in comedy with Seth Meyers. Trust me, it will be worth your five minutes.
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