Shannon Ables's Blog, page 326
July 7, 2015
Style Inspiration: Shades of Tan
Having neutrals in our capsule wardrobes are a peace of mind when the weather temperatures are shifting or we’re traveling to varying climates that we may not be familiar with. Even when it comes to accessories – shoes, handbags, scarves, belts, etc – selecting tan, beige or khaki is more often than not a very safe and dependable decision you won’t regret. Have a look at the many ways, varying shades of tan can work in a chic woman’s wardrobe.
~STYLE INSPIRATION POSTS FROM THE ARCHIVES YOU MIGHT ENJOY:
~The Francophile’s Style Guide: The 14 Essentials
Images: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) (11) (12) (13) (14)
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July 6, 2015
Gifts of Being a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP)
The Simple Sophisticate, episode #44
(We are currently experiencing technical difficulties with the uploading of the podcast. Rest-assured, as soon as it goes online, it will be live in iTunes and here on TSLL. Our apologies for the delay. Below is the transcript of the podcast; however, more detail and content will be available via audio.)
Abraham Lincoln, Jane Goodall, Princess Diana, Katherine Hepburn, Martin Luther King Jr., Albert Einstein, Glenn Close, Steve Martin, Eleanor Roosevelt, Ralph Waldo Emerson, Robert Frost, Emily Dickinson.
As you might have guessed each of the well-known individuals listed above either exuded or exudes traits of a HSP. Here are a few more: Frank Lloyd Wright, Ansel Adams, Frida Kahlo, Barbra Streisand, Mozart, Neil Young, Alanis Morisette, Elton John.
Dr. Elaine Aron, who is a research psychologist, university professor and psychotherapist as well as a self-identified HSP, points out that HSPs are “traditionally poets, writers, teachers, doctors, healers, lawyers, scientists, philosophers and theologians.” However, it is important to note that we recognize the names above because each of them embraced the strengths that define HSP.
So what exactly does highly sensitive mean? Aron, the best-selling author of The Highly Sensitive Person: How to Thrive When the World Overwhelms You, shares HSPs have an “increased sensitivity to stimulation” and “are more aware of subtleties and process information in a deeper, more reflective way.” And in so knowing the term, it is equally important to note, someone who identifies with being HSP is to know you were born with a sensitive nervous system, it is innate. And if you tap into your full potential, you will be astounded by the gifts you can bring to the world.
A few facts to be aware of:
Neither female or male have more of a tendency to identify as HSP, but due to certain cultural stereotypical expectations, such as men should not exhibit HSP traits, and women, while more welcomed to embrace them, often do so only to realize that society see such traits as inferior.
15-20% of the population is HSP (22% were found to be moderately sensitive)
Most introverts are HSP, but there are a few extroverts that are HSP as well. Susan Cain’s best-selling book Quiet:The Power of Introverts in a World that Can’t Stop Talking referenced Dr. Elaine Aron’s book frequently.
Non-HSPs are not inferior or should not be labeled as “insensitive”. The term sensitive is used in psychological terminology involves the nervous system as it is much more than one’s emotions. Anyone can be overwhelmed if too much stimulation occurs, it simply occurs quicker for HSPs and involves a wide array of stimuli that is often disregarded as having the ability to stimulate.
Characteristics of HSPs
1. Conscientious. Keen awareness of subtle details which cultivate a highly accurate intuition. Can be harmful as HSP may resort to being perfectionists or people-pleasers, so it is vital to find a balance.
2. Define “fun” differently. Adult learning classes, lectures, symphonies, art exhibits, opera, yoga, cooking classes, any event that is more intimate and has a thoughtful purpose is more in alignment of fun for HSPs rather than a busy happy hour at a bar, crowded gyms or lively cocktail party.
3. Sensitive to subtle things in the air, lights or fabrics. Hay fever, pollens, scents, odors, itchy fabric are much more perceptible to HSPs.
4. Good at tasks that involve observing minor differences. Scientists, detectives, caretakers, parents, teachers, psychologists, etc.
5. Able to focus and concentrate deeply.
6. Have an active imagination. The creative mind is the engine of the HSP and ideas can spark at any moment.
7. Prefer conversations of substance, philosophy, feelings, struggle, and dislike idle, pointless chitchat.
8. Due to society supposing they are flawed as revealed in a study shared in Dr. Elaine Aron’s book, many have a battered self-confidence and low self-esteem. However, once the HSP discovers the error made by society, they can reframe their past experiences and thrive.
9. Many who find their dream job, find a vocation that is focused or dealing with finding meaning for their life. HSPs are curious individuals and because they are conscientious, desire to find ways to help, improve and progress themselves and society.
10. Able to process material at deeper levels. Many HSPs may have heard the critique, “You over-analyze everything”, but so long as the analysis isn’t taken down a destructive path, it can lead to wonderful creations, inventions and ideas.
11. Typically a “Morning Person”, although there are exceptions. Because HSPs tend to have a hard time sleeping as they are sensitive to their environment paired with an active mind, they will wake up early and want to get the day started as they have things they want to accomplish and are acutely aware of the finite time available to them.
12. Enjoy time at home to decompress. (Read #16 in the list of Things Needed to Thrive to understand why.)
13. Over-arousal may lead to not participating in activities with others that you might have enjoyed in other circumstances, and thus, you may have heard “You’re missing out!” which builds worries, regrets and guilt that is misplaced. Staying home rather than participating if you are already overwhelmed will ensure when you do decide to participate, you will enjoy the experience.
14. Have heard common phrases such as “What is the matter with you?” and “Stop being so sensitive.”
15. Self-reflect more regularly.
16. Aroused more intensely by new and prolonged stimulation.
17. Greatest social fulfillment tends to come from close relationships, and this is where you are able to shine. HSPs are quite skilled in close,personal relationships, but can put up a wall if hurt in the past.
18. Due to low self-esteem (because society didn’t view the HSP traits as the ideal), you may fall in love with someone very much your inferior. (Listen to the podcast for an intriguing study about why so many college students “fall in love” during their first year.)
19. Tend not to share openly with just anyone. Colleagues or acquaintances may not understand this behavior and may label HSPs as aloof, arrogant and/or cold. Ultimately, it comes down to not wanting “to play politics”.
20. Group brainstorming and team projects are not as productive as you feel stifled and limited.
21. Excel at being self-employed as you can control your hours, stimulation, kinds of people you deal with and unlike many first-time entrepreneurs, will probably be conscientious about research and planning before you take any risks. However, be aware you may worry excessively and unnecessarily, and you may be inclined to work unthinkable hours as your creative minds is full of ideas.
22. Due to high intuition, can perceive trends in markets, and needs and potential before others do.
23. Find tranquility in nature, especially water.
24. Observant and therefore, very successful in understanding and building relationships of trust with children and animals.
25. Sensitive to pain.
26. Have an artistic side you enjoy expressing.
What a HSP Needs to Thrive:
1. Balance. When it comes to arousal and overstimulation, getting to know yourself is crucial. Know and be able to recognize when you are over-aroused, so you can either prevent such situations from happening or have a plan about how to tactfully remove yourself.
2. Boundaries.
3. Plenty of downtime.
4. Daily alone time.
5. Rest. Retire when you become sleepy. Establish clear evening rituals to signal to your mind that you are going to bed soon. Create a sleeping environment that is conducive to a restful night’s sleep.
6. Clear communication. With your significant other, friends, family, colleagues, communication is key, but it is crucial for a HSP as most people are not similar in experience as they as so long as those you are communicating with are wanting to build a relationship with you, they will be thankful for the heads up.
7. Relationships that strike the balance of giving to others and giving to yourself. If someone cannot or will not try to understand what you need, you may need to move on, but often, it simply takes communication. Dr. Elaine Aron points out that many might assume that two HSPs in a romantic relationships would be best, while others may think a ying and yang would be better. However, it truly depends on the two individuals. One a side note, she does admit that if two HSPs are in a relationships, and they both know their tendencies, they are likely to be more understanding of each other and thus foster a more supportive and less contentious partnership.
8. Time to step away from ordinary thinking – prayer, meditation, any activity that takes your mind off of your thoughts and onto the task at hand. Cooking, reality television shows, etc.
9. Spend time in nature.
10. Find and enjoy water: rain, lakes, ocean, rivers, simply drinking it regularly and often.
11. At work, choose to cultivate intense relationships where your emotional sensitivity can run free, outside of work as many may not understand.
12. Establish independence and strong sense of self and identity. HSPs have a strong need for independence as they abhor feeling trapped.
13. Take time-outs from heated or emotional interactions. Feeling over-aroused or trapped, step away, postponing not ending the conversation.
14. Take a walk, care for your body.
15. Accept the “loneliness” that many non-HSP identify with HSPs. Time alone is the “giftedness”, as Aron describes, that comes with being a HSP. Without this time, we couldn’t reach our full potential.
16. Discover and cultivate intangible containers as well as tangible containers. A tangible container, such as a home, a car, a library or a person are places where we feel safe and can relax. When we know we have containers that provide sanctuary, we find more strength to go out into the world with all of its stimulation. Intangible containers can be found in each of us, something that nobody can take away from us: our faith, our creative mind, spiritual meditation, etc.
17. Experience new things and realize most of what you will encounter will leave you safe. Experience positive new events builds your self-esteem and self-confidence, opening your eyes to what you are truly capable of.
18. Simple is best. When there is too much stuff, clutter, or an extremely busy schedule, we become overwhelmed and are unable to perform at our best. Simplicity is a HSPs best friend.
19. More HSPs need to be present in public roles. In order to reveal to societies the gifts that are available, we must have people of both types (non-HSPs and HSPs) in pivotal publish positions. The balance in public life will make it much easier for everyday HSPs going about their lives.
At the heart of living a simply luxurious life is getting to know yourself, and if along your journey of self-discovery you realize you are a HSP, it will hopefully be a moment of aha, perhaps a burden or weight is lifted from your shoulders as it was from mine.
Being a HSP, while not rare, is something most people do not have the fortune to embody. So as you move forward, embracing all of your amazing strengths and learning how to handle weaker tendencies, know that you have something amazing to offer the world. Now you must get about the business of reveling in your full potential.
~The Highly Sensitive Person: How to Thrive When the World Overwhelms You by Dr. Elaine Aron
~The Highly Sensitive Person Podcast with Kelly O’Laughlin, website
~A Highly Sensitive Person’s Life: Stories and Advice for Those Who Experience the World Intensely by Kelly O’Laughlin
~SIMILAR POSTS FROM THE ARCHIVES YOU MIGHT ENJOY:
~Confidence: How to Gain It and Why It’s Invaluable (podcast, episode #5)
~10 Ways to Strength Self-Worth
~Why Not . . . Enjoy Being an Introvert?
Petit Plaisir:
The Splendid Table with Lynne Rossetto Kasper, podcast
The Splendid Table cookbook (copyright 1992)
~The Best of Julia Child on The Splendid Table
Image: (1)
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July 3, 2015
This & That: No. 165
Tea, tea/coffee cups, a journal, a cookbook, pajamas and a heavenly candle. Looks like a lovely combination of simple luxuries for relaxing downtime . . .
Cookbook
~A Simple Feast: A Year of Stories and Recipes to Savor and Share
Diane Yen presents how and what to cook during each of the four seasons. Being mindful of what the earth makes in abundance briefly for each season, A Simple Feast shares beautiful images and paired recipes of how to cook what can be picked up at your local farmers’ market. I had the opportunity to flip through this cookbook this past weekend, and it is beautiful in its layout and offerings. I know many of us don’t have the luxury of eating from our gardens year round; therefore, this cookbook may shed new light on food you had forgotten was available in the throes of winter and beyond.
Decor
~Nest Candles
While perusing along Elm Street in New Canaan, I happened into a home decor boutique that offered all of the accessories that finish each room in the house: kitchenware, dishes, candles, bowls, vases, etc. And one item I wanted to purchase, but knew I didn’t have room in my suitcase to carry was a candle from Nest. As a fan of lavender, their Cedar Leaf and Lavender candles took my breath away as the scent was magnificent, and they also have an array of scents and sizes that will no doubt fill your home in the most wonderful way.
~Scrabble Letter Mug
Perhaps it’s the word lover in me or maybe it is simply me being nostalgic, but one of the mugs in the apartment I stayed at while visiting Manhattan this past week was a Scrabble mug. Coincidentally enough, I saw them in a stationery shop in New Canaan, and I while I don’t believe in “signs”, I must admit, I was drawn to it. As a teacher and a writer, I love my cup of tea in the morning to start the day, and for some reason, a personalized mug of sorts is always my preference. Well, whether you live in the UK or the states, the letter of your choosing can be yours. The font is slightly different for the UK mug (as was seen in a recent 007 film) compared to the ones available in the US, but still, the design in all other regards is the same.
Shopping
~Desmond & Dempsey’s Pajamas
From short sets to long sets, Desmond & Dempsey’s pajamas are made with 100% cotton and mother of pearl buttons. A luxury that will look as lovely as they are to sleep in.
Stationery
~Rifle Paper Co. Parisian Journals
Last Saturday I posted the photo below on Instagram, and a few of you noticed and asked about the book/journal that was below Marie Kondo’s book. Picked up at Elm Street Books, it is actually a journal from Rifle Paper Co. from their Parisian collection, and in even better news, it’s on sale for less than $13. There are many others available, but this one can be yours. The pages are not lined, simply blank, but it could be a nice gift or the journal to collect your thoughts that you’ve been looking for.
Tea Lovers
~TeaLeaves
Recommended by Tiffani Rogers of Style by Tiffani, TeaLeaves.com is a tea I am eager to try. Always looking for quality tea in the states (as I’ve already fallen in love with a few brands from Paris and London), this company may be right up my alley, and yours as well. Served at a recent gathering at a local bookstore in Greenwich, CT, Diane’s Books (I have now put this destination on my must-visit list as well), the tea came highly recommended.
~recipe for Patriotic Cheesecake Parfaits~
So, it’s hot. Excruciatingly hot, but the good news is that the weekend is here and hopefully you have access to either water to cool down in, great food to indulge in or cool accommodations to hide away in. Having returned to Oregon yesterday and being greeted by 105 temperatures, I am now escaping to a cooler place for a few days. The past week and a half has been amazing, and now my feet need a rest and so does my mind (and most importantly, I miss my boys).
Sometimes I think that is what summer holidays are all about, resting the mind. We all need to do this regularly, and as a result, our work, our relationships and ultimately, our lives benefit greatly. Whether you are stateside or an international reader, I hope you have plans in the next three months to get away or at least slow down. If nothing else to catch up on sleep and your thoughts to assess the goals you have been working so tremendously hard to forge forward towards. Sometimes we need a rerouting, but often, we just need a rest to allow us to rev our engines back up. Have a wonderful weekend, and enjoy a bit of reading material below. Until Monday (as the podcast will return!), bon weekend!
~Having just returned from traveling from one coast to the next, this article – 15 Reasons Why Frequent Travelers Are More Likely to be Successful – caught my eye
~A thoughtful response to Justice Kennedy’s commentary on the gay marriage decision from a single person’s perspective: The Lonely Heart’s Club
~Take a look at the schedules of highly successful people. You might be surprised and inspired of how so much is in each of our reach.
~American Ballet Theater announced unprecedented news on Tuesday involving Misty Copeland. Certainly a reminder of tending to our dreams and being unrelenting in the pursuit.
~Mental strength allows for so much more contentment in our lives; read this post to be inspired to strengthen the muscle of your mind – 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do
~Short and Powerful: 10 Ways Happy People Choose Happiness
~Monday may be a few days away, so save reading this article until Sunday evening for your dose of inspiration: 7 Monday Morning Habits of Highly Successful People
~THIS & THAT POSTS FROM THE ARCHIVES:
~No. 164: jazzy French tunes, a great summer read, a great summer straw hat and more
~No. 163: a cotton robe to luxuriate in, PBS’s return of a favorite, a simple sandal and more
~No. 162: a lovely French rom-com, a travel book for fellow Francophiles, a blues/jazz record to add to your collection and more
Images: (2)
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July 2, 2015
Thoughts from the Editor: New Canaan Book Signing
As I mentioned in Monday’s post, traveling always brings with it many life lessons, and my jaunt to New Canaan, Connecticut, provided many to revel in, absorb and now to the task applying. With fewer than 20,000 people fortunate to call this gem of a New England town home, New Canaan should be put on your list of places to visit. In the few short hours that I had the opportunity to visit for TSLL book signing at Elm Street Books, I was in awe, and wish I had had more time to peruse, and take a tour of this amazing house.
The signing, attendance and conversation that transpired this past Saturday far exceeded my expectations, and as I mentioned in this Instagram post as I took the North Metro train back to Manhattan, it will remain as a beautiful memory for much time to come.
Prior to the signing, having arrived a few hours early, I took a walk through the nearby neighborhood streets and captured some images of the homes that caught my eye. It was rare for a house not grab my attention, and with the lush yards and foliage, every home was a treat to behold.
As the signing began, I was eager to be situated outside in front of the store as I was able to meet and talk to locals and tourists as they strolled Elm Street which is sprinkled with boutiques, coffee and sweet shops, stationery stores, decor and gourmet grocers and antique shops. However, the weatherman had other plans, as the sprinkling of rain that would later in the afternoon become a torrential downpour, moved me inside.
Elm Street Books is the type of bookstore one might imagine when they conjure up an ideal local bibliophile’s dream. Small, but not too small, a plethora of variety for any predilection you might have and a staff that was regularly answering questions that locals had, clearly trusting their recommendations, of what to read for their particular tastes. Needless to say, I was in heaven, and had to pick up a few items of my own prior to leaving.
Below is a collection of images from shops I stopped into and highly recommend you visit as well. Enjoy a virtual tour of a small town that is truly simply luxurious.
Gingerbitz is situated on Elm Street directly across the street from Starbucks, and it is a sweet tooth’s haven. Opened in 2014 by baker Karen Zuckert and her husband Andrew, Karen has been baking for clients for more than 20 years, and much to the glee of locals and tourists, opened her French-esque aesthetic bakery which serves sandwiches, salads, cakes, cupcakes, quiches (my choice, and let me just say, melt-in-your mouth delicious), organic smoothies, coffee, tea and of course baked goods galore.
Let me for a moment speak to the hospitality of the shop. With fifteen classic bistro seats inside, I stepped through the door just as they were closing to pick up a very late lunch, and an opportunity to get out of the rain. Andrew and his staff, without hesitation served me the meal you see below and graciously invited me to stay and enjoy the space that truly feels much like a dream.
~Quiche Lorraine placed on a bed of spinach tossed with a delicious vinaigrette~
As I mentioned in this Instagram post, Saturday evening was the last day of my trip to Manhattan, and I was exhausted, so I decided to pop into the local recommended gourmet deli to pick up dinner to go. Garelick & Herbs, while I do like Whole Foods, put it to shame. Selecting a Dijonnaise salmon, paired with a broccoli rabe salad and a berry bar that had a puff pastry topping so buttery and flaky I was torn between eating it quickly and savoring it, complemented a most memorable day. Have a look at their catering menu here.
Recommended by a reader who is a resident of New Canaan, I stopped into Pimlico, an interior decor shop and design service boutique on the corner of Elm Street and South Ave. While my pictures inside do not do it justice, the eye of Melissa Lindsay, who has on her resume graphic design jobs for Vogue and New York, her taste, is a beautiful marriage of modern classic and cozy. With soft, cool colors appearing to be inspired by living near the ocean, to sound, ponderous statement pieces that garner conversation to begin much like the chandeliers on display, I was sure to take a card for potential purchase of items or maybe even design services via Skype.
Walking around the neighborhood gave me the opportunity to see a handful of homes that caught my attention.
And wouldn’t you know, shoes, shoemaking in fact, are at the root of the founding of New Canaan. Whether I was influenced by this fact or simply just love to shop, I stopped into Walin & Wolff and took advantage of a current shoe sale of top designer shoes. Thankfully they were able to ship to Oregon free of charge because the deals I found were quite nice.
~Walin & Wolff, clothing and shoe boutique~
Sometimes when I travel, I discover new destinations and exhibits that I wish I had put on my itinerary. One such destination was Philip Johnson’s famed Glass House. Only available to see with a scheduled tour, you may recognize the home, as one reader informed me, from the pages of Vogue as they have used it numerous times for editorial photo shoots. The history is worth reading about even if you will not be able to visit in person, but rest assured, I will return and see it with my own eyes someday. (The images below are from The Glass House website, visit here.)
To and from, the trip began in Grand Central Terminal (below). Such an effortless way to commute, and with the train literally stopping (dead-ending) at the beginning of Elm Street in New Canaan, you can’t help but be urged to hop on the Metro-North line (transfer at Stamford station). While you can purchase your tickets (buy off-peak to save money) at the station, you can also purchase them on-line a few days in advance (they mail them to you), and save a few bucks for a round-trip ticket. (I need to thank Tiffani and Carolyn for giving me tips and advice on how to make a successful trip; I had a lot of questions, having never left the city before, and their patience was much appreciated.)
~POSTS FROM THE ARCHIVES OF PAST STOPS ON TSLL BOOK TOUR:
~Thoughts from the Editor: The Bookloft (Hometown Book Signing)
~Thoughts from the Editor: New Orleans
All images, except The Glass House or Johnson House by Philip Johnson, taken by TSLL iPhone 6
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July 1, 2015
Decor Inspiration: A Restful Manse
Notice the Chinese guard dog (Fu dogs) bookends on the mantle. And now, imagine me kicking myself. As I spent time in New Canaan, Connecticut, last weekend, I stopped into a delightful antique shop, and what caught my eye? What prompted the owner to engage with me conversation? Drop the price even? A similar, nearly identical pair of 19th century bookends. Now, if we’re being honest, I probably couldn’t have afforded them, but they, of all the items in the shop, caught my eye, and I missed my chance should I have wanted to take it. But enough with my woes.
Interior designer Jimmy Stanton, whose shop, Stanton Home Furnishings in Atlanta, Georgia, demonstrates his well-trained eye for blending traditional items with unique and found objects in his Madison 1831 Greek Revival abode. Featured in Atlanta Homes & Lifestyles this past April, each room is warm, yet cool and tranquil. From the light fixtures to the upholstered chairs, I especially adore the round mirror above the buffet in the dining room and the velvet sofa in the sitting room. Another room choice I have been noticing in many guest rooms is the pairing of twin beds. I find this to be a brilliant use of space, and while not often considered, is something that opens up a home to more guests, while incorporating symmetry that draws the eye. Perhaps it is just me, but I quite like this. But there is so much more to enjoy and be inspired by. On with the tour!
~DECOR INSPIRATION POSTS FROM THE ARCHIVES:
Images via Atlanta Homes & Lifestyles
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Word of the Week: No. 9
Click below for pronunciation:
http://www.thesimplyluxuriouslife.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/06/eunoia.m4a
~WORDS OF THE WEEK FROM THE ARCHIVES:
Image: (1)
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June 30, 2015
Outfit of the Week: Cool & Natural
~James Perse white linen shirt dress (light blue also available)~
~Ancient Greek Sandal ‘Clio’ Sandal or Tory Burch Daisy Perforated Wedge Sandal or Chandelier Logo Wedge Sandal (on sale)~
~Kenneth Jay Lane multi-strand beaded necklace~
~Madewell Savannah Saddlebag: crossbody, use promo code META20 to save 20% or Pierre Balmain leather trimmed canvas tote~
SHOP THE OUTFIT:
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OUTFITS OF THE WEEK FROM THE ARCHIVES:
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Style Inspiration: Shades of White
As someone who doesn’t bathe in the sun, however, loves the warmth of the summer months so as to partake in the outdoor activities, Chance’s oversized sun hat immediately captured my attention. You can shop it here, and while it’s a bit of a stretch budget-wise, it may be something to save up for it something of this stature and statement has always been on your wish list. With that said, this upcoming weekend is an extended one here in the states as we celebrate Independence. Interesting historical facts about the 239th birthday of the USofA:
26 copies of the copies of the Declaration of Independence have survived, and three are held by private collectors
On July 2, 1776 the Second Continental Congress voted in favor of independence, on July 4th it was officially adopted, but a month would pass before the actual signing took place.
And with that aside, back to inspiration for your summer celebratory ensemble. White, warm white, ivory, eggshell, off-white, you name it, now is the time to wear the classic summer hue with abandon. Mix and match, layer and don’t forget a straw hat as the finishing touch.
~STYLE INSPIRATION POSTS FROM THE ARCHIVES:
Images: (1 – Chance Co.) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) (11) (12) (13)
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June 29, 2015
23 Life Lessons Learned in NYC & New Canaan
~PODCAST LISTENERS: Please note, that the next episode of The Simple Sophisticate will return next Monday. Due to my travels, I wasn’t able to produce the episode I have been working on, and rather than do something too quickly, I will be fine tuning it over the week. It is a topic that is dear to my heart and has struck a cord, and I look forward to sharing it with you next week. Thank you for understanding.
Every time I travel, even if it is to a familiar destination, if it involves different events, people or sight-seeing destinations, I am overwhelmed with the life lessons. Often what you’ll find me doing during my travels when I have down-time, or am eating a meal alone, is whipping out my Moleskine journal or my Notes on my iPhone and listing everything that is dancing around in my mind, trying to catch the thoughts before they disappear or are tossed out because new ones come to fruition. Last year, upon returning from Manhattan, I posted these 25 lessons, and to follow suit, in lieu of the podcast this week, I wanted to share with you what I learned on my recent trip when I returned, as well as my jaunt to New Canaan, Connecticut, for TSLL book signing event on Saturday.
1. Curiosities shouldn’t be ignored. Even if you are shocked with what you discover, they are opening your eyes to something that will bring you closer to your most authentic self.
2. The gift of our travels is often not the places we seek to explore, but the people we meet while we are there. Each time I travel, especially most recently when I toured the United Nations, the 9/11 Memorial Museum, but simply walking around the city and traveling along the subway, is the eye-opening that occurs. Even with all of our external and vocal varieties, we are all much more alike than we are different.
3. There will be some passions that we will outgrow as we progress through our journey, this is okay, and something to be celebrated. Much of our life is a progression, and we need to travel through and experience certain curiosities in order to get to the next one. Each passion that is sincerely, innately something we are drawn to occurred for a reason, to open our eyes, teach us something about ourselves that we didn’t already know, but needed to discover in order to progress toward our true potential.
4. Some museums/exhibits/destination need to be experienced solely with the heart and mind, not with a camera. The one place I didn’t not snap a photo was inside the 9/11 Memorial Museum. As one of my students urged (thank you Marlene), it is an emotional experience, even for those of us who were on the other side of the country when it occurred. In certain places and situations we must simply allow ourselves to feel what we are feeling, let the tears or frustration flow from us and be fully present.
~NYC’s Freedom Tower, located next to the 9/11 Memorial Museum~
5. Paying for comfort whether in your hotel, vacation rental, airline seating, etc. is worth the elimination of unnecessary stress. While I have never purchased first class tickets, I did save up for comfort class on Delta, just those extra perks of loading first, more leg space, knowing there would be headspace above my seat for my luggage and a few extra free snacks and drinks, as well as wi-fi, makes those long coast-to-coast flights far more comfortable.
6. Download the necessary travel apps to ease your mind and save you money and time. I lived by Embark for the subway lines, but MTA Subway Time is one you can use as well. I’m sure there are others, but Embark never steered me wrong (sometimes on the weekends, there will be repairs, but there will be posters on the platform of which lines are temporarily closed and alternate routes).
7. Eating at the bar is a great way to eat out alone at great restaurants. I was quite eager to dine at Donahue’s after this story was printed in The New York Times. And the food, service and decor is exactly as professed in the article. A relic from the 1960s, primarily locals, and a hole-in-the-wall on the Upper East Side you won’t find unless you know what you’re looking for. Seated between a UES couple who I later learned at three adult children, and three gentleman friends getting together after work for a gourmet hamburger, my favorite part was talking with the bartender Tom and watching the New York Yankees play the Astros. Lovely, put it on your true Manhattan haunts to visit.
I also had enjoyed the conversation with John, the bartender at Pearl’s Oyster Bar. Clearly a natural at meeting people and making them feel right at home.
~Pearl’s Oyster Bar serves an amazing Lobster Roll, and eating at the bar is just as magnificent as sitting at the table, especially for lunch when your feet are exhausted.~
8. If you’re running late, as I tend to do because I don’t realize how long it will take me to go from one place to the next, text the person prior to the time you are to meet to give them the heads up. Perhaps they are running late as well and will be able to catch their breath and not rush to make it.
9. Putting yourself out there, not knowing the people you will be surrounded by or how the circumstances will work out, often opens up doors to extraordinary connections and memories you won’t soon want to forget. Autumn, Linda, Melissa, Carla, Carolyn, Sheila and so many of TSLL readers that stopped by on Saturday, thank you for making the journey (some from nearby and some from many states away), to say hello. I will never forget the New Canaan book signing primarily for this reason.
10. When you choose to stretch yourself, you never know who you may have inspired to do the same. Leading by example is a fulfilling way to live.
11. Kindness will never go out of style. The owner at Ginger Bitz was just one of the many lovely interactions I had that involved unexpected over-the-top kindness. And it is in extending this kindness, we inspire others to pay it forward. We personally may not experience the gift that was cultivated, but someone else will, and that is more than enough reason to choose the act of kindness.
~GingerBitz: the most delicious quiche Lorraine I have ever had, and I’ve had many slices over my 36 years.~
12. The best recommendations come from the locals you meet. It requires that we initially step into a new environment without a pre-set plan, but if we have the courage to ask while we’re there, the experience of the destination is usually quite enhanced. And always ask why they recommend what they do which will give you an insight if it indeed will be something you will enjoy.
~Pimlico Interior Designs and Decor~
13. Small, locally owned usually is best when it comes to bookstores. (Stop by later this week as I’ll share images and details on the book signing. Can’t wait? Visit my Instagram page for a handful of pics and posts.)
14. If you have children, take them regularly to bookstores or libraries and let them explore on their own. You may have just given them the key to a brand new world. So many parents brought their children into the bookstore where the signing was held, and it was not a specialized children’s bookstore. I saw many a child with their eyes in awe of books on the shelves.
~15. You don’t have to love all aspects of your job, so long as the majority of what you spend your time doing is your passion. Writing, exploring, reading and meeting TSLL readers are what I love about blogging and being an author, but there are other expectations as well that must be tended to; thankfully, they are not the majority of the pie, and can easily be tended to as the primary product and journey are each items I couldn’t live without.
16. Local haunts are often the best to dine at to experience the truth of your destination. Often these establishments are more comfortable, personable and feel as close to dining at home as is possible (because the tourists are not swarming). Check out the local newspapers for reviews of such locales. As I mentioned Donahue’s was one such gem, but on my trip a couple of years ago I visited a small Italian restaurant right behind MoMa, Il Gattopardo, and I highly recommend Le Colonial in midtown as well. For more of my first-hand recommendations of all of the cities, be sure to visit my City Guides page.
17. It is only when you put yourself out there for the world to see, your authentic self, that you can attract what you are truly seeking.
18. Adhere to your exercise and health routine as much as possible. On my first afternoon/evening in the city, I hopped off the five hour flight from Portland and was thrilled to have the opportunity to partake in Bryant Park’s Yoga in the Park that occurs each summer. The experience is free, mats are provided, and you get to have an amazing memory and body stretch. Also, pack a medium-sized water bottle for your travels (especially the plane), to stay hydrated.
19. Fewer carbs and more protein and vegetables. If you travel often you no doubt notice that for travelers, the carbs are everywhere. Delicious in many places no doubt, and easy to be drawn to, but don’t over-indulge. What will truly satiate your hunger is what you do when you’re on your everyday eating schedule – a balance meal with proteins, fiber and vegetables. Save the indulgencs for extraordinary special restaurants, bakeries, etc. Your waistline will thank you.
20. Experiencing a talent in-person is a rare treat, and when doing so, they surpass expectation with their talent and poise, one cannot help but be inspired to strive further and dig deeper to find our true potential. Helen Mirren on stage in The Audience was another highlight of my trip. Being four rows from the stage, she was magnificent. (And when the corgies ran onto the stage in the second act, I was also quite tickled.)
21. Just because you’re surrounded by new places to see and things to do doesn’t mean you can’t stay in one evening and just savor “living” in your dream destination. On my last night in Manhattan, I was exhausted – tickled pink, but exhausted. So I picked up amazing deli food from a New Canaan grocer (below), brought it home on the train with me and dined at the Upper West Side apartment I had the fortune to stay at. The rain poured (walking, or should I say, running home from the subway left me drenched but smiling), the wind whipped wildly, and I lounged in what I can only say looked and felt like the apartment in You’ve Got Mail.
~Garelick & Herbs offered endless deli options, similar to a Whole Foods, but boutique-esque~
22. Sometimes our trips become even more memorable for the historical events that happen while we are visiting, making them all the more special. When the historic news from SCOTUS broke on Friday, I was sitting in the United Nations building waiting for my tour to begin.
~The Security Council room in the United Nations~
~The United Nations: Did you know that all 193 countries flags are displayed outside in English Alphabetical order? Beginning with Afghanistan and ending with Zimbabwe (tours are only $18, but be sure to reserve your spot weeks in advance).~
23. What we think will make us truly happy and what actually does are often two separate things. Such a revelation is not something to be disappointed by, but rather a lesson to be appreciative to have learned. Too often people continue to seek what others tell them will make them happy rather than trusting what they know genuinely cultivates happiness, making it far easier to say no to the happiness pretenders.
In just three short days, my eyes were opened yet again, and I will forever be changed. While I sure there are many more lessons that I will be able to formulate in the days to come, I wanted to give you a peek into the trip that you, the readers of TSLL, made possible. Thank you for your interest in living simply luxuriously. I hope you have a wonderful week.
~SIMILAR POSTS FROM THE ARCHIVES YOU MIGHT ENJOY:
~City Guides (first-hand recommendations from all of my past travels)
~While in New York City: Day One (2012)
~While in London (2012)
~While in Paris (2012)
~Paris: Day One (three part series)
Images: All images taken with iPhone 6 by TSLL
The post 23 Life Lessons Learned in NYC & New Canaan appeared first on The Simply Luxurious Life®.
June 26, 2015
This & That: No. 164
Book
~800 Grapes by Laura Dave
Set in a Sonoma vineyard in wine country, California, Laura Dave’s novel (June 2, 2015) is an escape and a summer leisure read to become engrossed in as it involves family secrets discovered just before the protagonist of the novel Georgia is about to marry. A story about relationships, life and the secret behind a worthwhile bottle of wine (hint: take a look at the title), I think you might enjoy with a glass of wine tucked away in the shade on one of our many hot summer days.
~J’Adore Montreal by Isabelle LaFleche
Successful Francophile novelist Isabelle LaFleche has just released a short 30 page Kindle edition of her beloved protagonist Catherine Lambert in J’Adore Montreal. Many of you may have become acquainted with Catherine Lambert in her previous two novels: J’Adore New York and J’Adore Paris, and her journey to Montreal is certain to entertain and enthrall as LaFleche takes readers behind the scenes of haute couture in Montreal as Lambert is tasked with heading up Dior’s re-opening in the city’s chicest department store.
Movie
~Mr. Holmes
Last summer, Mitch Cullin’s 2005 book A Slight Trick of the Mind was adapted for the big screen in the film titled Mr. Holmes. Having been recently released in the UK on June 19th, it will arrive in the United States on July 17th. What is the plot you might be wondering? Ian McKellen stars as the 93 year old Sherlock Holmes who having been long-retired lives in a tucked away Sussex farmhouse with his housekeeper Mrs. Munro (Laura Linney) and her young son Roger. In revisiting an old case in which he adamantly disagrees with Watson’s account, he tries to recall the details for himself, but has trouble with his memory. The journey begins. Have a look at the trailer below.
Music
~Stacey Kent
A Grammy-nominated American Jazz singer, I was recently introduced to Stacey Kent’s music as a reader suggested her French vocals, as well as her English tunes. Raised in New Jersey and trained in London, Kent’s talents lead the ear to believe she is not American, with her soft, bird-like tones, that dance with the music rhythms. Needless to say, I couldn’t have agreed more with the recommendation (Thank you Kel!), especially her Raconte-Moi (tell me) album which was released in 2010. Take a listen below and have a look at her tour schedule as she may just be in your area.
Shopping
~Eugenia Kim Francis woven straw hat
With summer comes the need for protecting our skin, and while sunscreen should always be worn, donning a chic hat isn’t a bad idea either. Eugenia Kim’s designs are abundant, and this design may just be the most versatile and worthy of bringing along on your travels.
Travel
~Lipault Luggage
Part of enjoying travel is ensuring that the going and coming is streamlined, effortless and void of headaches. A significant part of tending to each of these is the luggage we choose to use. I was recently given Lipault’s 20″ two wheel satchel in navy and was tickled with how well-constructed it was. Indeed it does fold-up with ease when empty for easy storage (which is half the dilemma as well: where to put it in our homes when not in use), and it holds its shape (as you can see below in my Instagram pic). Ideal for a short weekend getaway, they also have carry-on foldable luggage in a variety of colors.
~recipe for Rustic White Peach, Blueberry and Basil Skillet Galettes~
As Friday morning begins, I am waking up in the city I will never tire of visiting, New York City. With a book signing scheduled for Saturday (click here for all of the details), today I am eager to explore, experience and enjoy as many places, haunts, museums, restaurants, and plays that I have been putting on my to-do list since last summer’s visit. And rest assured, you can come along with me via Instagram (@thesimplyluxuriouslife).
This past, and first week of summer has been a lovely one here on TSLL, and if you haven’t had a chance to see what we’ve been up to, check out this week’s episode of The Simple Sophisticate as we talk about all things summer, tune in to my interview with Tranquility du Jour‘s Kimberly Wilson as we discuss what living a simply luxurious life is all about, and did you see what Norman and I did on Monday? Phew, it’s been a busy, but very fun week, and now I think we all could use a respite. I do hope you enjoy yourself, and if you’re looking for some intriguing articles and posts, I’ve gathered a few below. Until Monday, bon weekend!
~A beautiful reminder of the benefits of letting go of busy . . . 10 Things to Look Forward to on the Other Side of Busy
~A timeless piece of kitchenware to have on hand is an item from Le Creuset, and David Leibovitz takes readers inside the factory in great detail. Enjoy the tour here.
~Traveling in Paris this summer or in the future? Bookmark this post from Hip Paris . . . Paris’ Best Natural Wine Bars & Shops
~So much truth in this post. A must-read . . . 5 Things That Happen When You Embrace Being Alone
~The best advice any mother should give their daughter when it comes to style . . . The Only Fashion Advice Your Daughter Really Needs
~And last, but definitely not least . . . 20 Things We Should Say to Ourselves More Often
Images: (2)
The post This & That: No. 164 appeared first on The Simply Luxurious Life®.
