Chris Rodell's Blog, page 48
October 27, 2016
Church rules on cremation & what we did with Dad
(630 words)
Procedural Vatican news about the care and preservation of human cremains has me belatedly wondering if we did the old man right.
Dead 12 years, we created the crap out of him in ’04.
Papal officers say cremation is permissible only if the ashy remains aren’t divvied up, strewn about or kept on some mantel at home. They must, instead, be stored in a sacred,
Procedural Vatican news about the care and preservation of human cremains has me belatedly wondering if we did the old man right.
Dead 12 years, we created the crap out of him in ’04.
Papal officers say cremation is permissible only if the ashy remains aren’t divvied up, strewn about or kept on some mantel at home. They must, instead, be stored in a sacred,
October 25, 2016
Cubs will lose
(595 words)
I was 19 years old the first time I went to Chicago. It was the summer Doug and I barnstormed the Midwest with a traveling carnival.
We made good money, had a great time and learned there were at least a few Illinois girls reckless enough with their reputations to be seen kissing carnies.
During an off-day, I toured the historic Chicago Tribune building and saw the office
I was 19 years old the first time I went to Chicago. It was the summer Doug and I barnstormed the Midwest with a traveling carnival.
We made good money, had a great time and learned there were at least a few Illinois girls reckless enough with their reputations to be seen kissing carnies.
During an off-day, I toured the historic Chicago Tribune building and saw the office
October 24, 2016
Has "Walking Dead" jumped the zombie shark?
(877 words)
The show had been gut-wrenching — and I don’t mean that as a dramatic critique.
No, in “Walking Dead” you can see people use things like wrenches to remove guts. It’s a weekly disgust.
My wife, a devoted fan, was eager to talk about it. She wanted to pick my brain.
“Are you done with it?” she asked.
I told her, no. I still feel invested in the characters and the
The show had been gut-wrenching — and I don’t mean that as a dramatic critique.
No, in “Walking Dead” you can see people use things like wrenches to remove guts. It’s a weekly disgust.
My wife, a devoted fan, was eager to talk about it. She wanted to pick my brain.
“Are you done with it?” she asked.
I told her, no. I still feel invested in the characters and the
October 21, 2016
When did Facebook become Hatebook?
(561 words)
I wonder how many parents warn their children about the perils of social media malevolence and then take to social media to engage in perilously malevolent behavior.
They rant, they bully, they poison once-vital friendships.
When did Facebook become Hatebook?
Every one is looking to fight.
We live in an age that’d be a curse to anyone trying to make a living as a
I wonder how many parents warn their children about the perils of social media malevolence and then take to social media to engage in perilously malevolent behavior.
They rant, they bully, they poison once-vital friendships.
When did Facebook become Hatebook?
Every one is looking to fight.
We live in an age that’d be a curse to anyone trying to make a living as a
October 18, 2016
Wazoo & Ying Yang are NOT Chinese rivers
(636 words)
After hours spent scouring topographical maps of China, I can safely declare there is no Wazoo River, no Ying Yang River nor any associated Wazoo or Ying Yang gulf, bay or estuary.
So if you want to cruise up the Ying Yang or out the ol’ Wazoo you’re up Shitt’s Creek, which, by the way, is the name of a satirical Canadian TV show starring Eugene Levy.
I can’t explain why
After hours spent scouring topographical maps of China, I can safely declare there is no Wazoo River, no Ying Yang River nor any associated Wazoo or Ying Yang gulf, bay or estuary.
So if you want to cruise up the Ying Yang or out the ol’ Wazoo you’re up Shitt’s Creek, which, by the way, is the name of a satirical Canadian TV show starring Eugene Levy.
I can’t explain why
October 17, 2016
Visit Tin Lizzy today! An advertorial praising my hosts
I’ve begun leaving empty beer bottles and a nearly drained fifth of Wild Turkey strewn upon my office desk.
I do this to perpetuate the myth I spend all my writing time in the Tin Lizzy all gooned up.
And that’s why I’m so wildly successful!
But more and more, strangers are wandering up to the third floor and I wouldn’t want them to think the Tin is hosting some stick-up-his-butt
I do this to perpetuate the myth I spend all my writing time in the Tin Lizzy all gooned up.
And that’s why I’m so wildly successful!
But more and more, strangers are wandering up to the third floor and I wouldn’t want them to think the Tin is hosting some stick-up-his-butt
October 14, 2016
At Fort Days selling "Last Baby Boomer" errata
(659 words)
Wise friends said they were dumbfounded when I deliberately chose to have “The Last Baby Boomer” released in January instead of December. They thought I was foolish to release a book after Christmas.
They didn’t understand.
In fact, I did release it in plenty of time for Christmas.
Christmas 2016!
And now it’s really ready for sales and promotion. Now, it’s been in
Wise friends said they were dumbfounded when I deliberately chose to have “The Last Baby Boomer” released in January instead of December. They thought I was foolish to release a book after Christmas.
They didn’t understand.
In fact, I did release it in plenty of time for Christmas.
Christmas 2016!
And now it’s really ready for sales and promotion. Now, it’s been in
October 13, 2016
Teaching shy kids how to make friends
(595 words)
More evidence that I deserve my “All Star Dad” mug came when I was chatting with our 10 year old on the walk home from the school bus stop.
I asked if she’d yet made any new friends in the new school year.
She had not.
She then out-of-the-blue revealed she’d two years ago heeded some of my keystone advice and that it had really paid off.
“Do you remember telling me
More evidence that I deserve my “All Star Dad” mug came when I was chatting with our 10 year old on the walk home from the school bus stop.
I asked if she’d yet made any new friends in the new school year.
She had not.
She then out-of-the-blue revealed she’d two years ago heeded some of my keystone advice and that it had really paid off.
“Do you remember telling me
October 11, 2016
Hire me to ensure a memorable funeral
(655 words)
I may be posting “Help Wanted” ads in the next few weeks. I’m thinking of hiring about 200 part-time actors who I’ll pay to attend the funerals of deceased clients intent on memorable send offs.
This latest brainstorm occurred to me last week as I was sitting there in the pew mourning Arnold Palmer. I’ve been to weddings that were less uplifting.
A veritable who’s who of
I may be posting “Help Wanted” ads in the next few weeks. I’m thinking of hiring about 200 part-time actors who I’ll pay to attend the funerals of deceased clients intent on memorable send offs.
This latest brainstorm occurred to me last week as I was sitting there in the pew mourning Arnold Palmer. I’ve been to weddings that were less uplifting.
A veritable who’s who of
October 7, 2016
A gassy discussion of cheap fuel
(688 words)
That gas prices at my local mini-mart have since the start of summer remained low and not fluctuated even a penny can only mean one thing …
The Middle East today is a bastion of peace and stability!
Whew, I didn’t see that coming.
I didn’t see gas prices being such a non-issue either.
Can you imagine the turmoil if we Americans, as many predicted, were paying $5 a
That gas prices at my local mini-mart have since the start of summer remained low and not fluctuated even a penny can only mean one thing …
The Middle East today is a bastion of peace and stability!
Whew, I didn’t see that coming.
I didn’t see gas prices being such a non-issue either.
Can you imagine the turmoil if we Americans, as many predicted, were paying $5 a
