Leila Marie Lawler's Blog, page 12
April 8, 2023
Easter Chitchat and Love!
My power went out for most of the morning, so my time for posting is just about gone! But let’s have a quick visit anyway! Maybe you will have a moment in between all your own preparation to have a cup of tea with me!
I did get some “powerless” tasks accomplished in the meantime, like setting the table most of the way (napkins not pictured on the table, because I still have to iron them and got delayed in that job!)
And chopping the pistachios for the Ba’lawa (Egyptian version of Baklava, highly very superior, remind me to post about my method someday… ).
Here is a little of the baking I have already done — I will post more on Instagram, which is quicker. Chocolate Babka (I posted about it here last year):
You don’t need power to get out the decorated eggs of yesteryear… done by many in our family. They don’t hold a candle to Deirdre’s creations (though some of them are from when she was much younger), but they do make a nice decoration!
I can manage to seat 13 at my table — there is not one inch for a seat at the very end, if you are wondering — if I add a card table with a top I found on clearance at some store back many years ago. It’s a circle and allows me to fit four, even losing the one side that is up against the main table. It folds in half and I store it under my bed:
And the piano bench squeezes in two more (where that space is where you don’t see chairs!). The little plate, fork, and spoon are for the toddler who will sit in the high chair:
The tablecloth is from Lovely Lady Linens — it’s super long and goes right over the two tables!
I didn’t have enough plain candles for my little silver candelabra, so I had to mix in red ones. It’s fine, I think!
At last, Spring is beginning to spring, even though the low this morning was 28℉. Last week I spent a lot of time rushing to get my onion sets planted with all that entails in terms of distraction: cleaning up random beds, moving trellises and fences, and remembering to plant peas as well.
So my Easter baking got flung forward into the past couple of days… not sure why I don’t do it in mid-Lent and put things in the freezer!
I want to share with you a poem my husband wrote one day last week. He came home from daily Mass and went into his office. In a bit, he returned and handed me this piece of paper, saying that “it just came to me at Mass!” I asked what the title is; “that didn’t come to me.”
I think it’s a good one for this day:
At last I could do no more.
The weight of past mistakes— and worse
Weighed down my shoulders,
More than I could lift.
My paltry efforts—
Too few, too weak,
Too often gone awry,
Only made the burden
More oppressive.
I knew at last I could not stand.
So finally,
More in shame than sorrow,
I asked Him to lift from me
This weight I could not bear myself,
Although it was my own.
It was too much for me.
But for Him— already burdened past endurance—
What difference would it make:
Another ton or two?
Then I watched,
Expecting his shoulders to sag
Under this new weight.
But his agonized posture changed
Not a whit,
As if He felt no difference.
Now I wondered:
Was his strength so great
That, spent though He was,
He still could take another burden
Without even a shrug?
Yes, but no.
His strength might be incalculable,
But here was something more.
I realized— far too late—
That He had taken my burden
Already, all through that bloody Day
That lasts forever.
So I joined the Woman
And her new-adopted son,
Who did not smile,
But looked on me with eyes
Softened by tears,
Yet warm and bright.
And when his Body finally sank
My heart was heavy,
Knowing well my role
In that blessed Disaster.
Yet my step was light,
My burden gone.
A Blessed Easter to you! We love you!
bits & piecesA beautiful reflection on the Eucharist, a must-read: The Eucharist is not just for eating
I wanted you to know about the Poor Clares of Santa Barbara — they are the real deal!
Hillsdale is right here: Hillsdale College breaks ties with Tallahassee school over Michelangelo’s ‘David’ controversy
We have to understand what culture is, so that, for one thing, we can understand what pornography is, and reject it. The David is the very pinnacle of high art because it radiates the truth of man as he is meant to be, as he was created by God. What’s notable about the nude form as depicted in the statue (and other such sculptures of which it is the apotheosis) is the perfect balance, proportion, and hierarchy of humanity, reason, and spirit. Yes, we (and children) see his genitals. They are, in ancient fashion, “at rest” and minimized in comparison with his chest (his courage and thumos) and his noble head (his mind, Reason). We need precisely this depiction — among other qualities (its beauty, its truth about the actual Biblical figure, from whom Our Lord received His own manhood, ultimately), as an image against which to measure degraded ones.
I was noticing that currants are just not available (sadly for my Irish Soda Bread), but I have only recently realize that there are two different things called currants! Do you know a good, cost-effective source for the dried berries?
Fr. John Naugle writes movingly about the Light of Easter: Reflections on the Triduum: Can the Darkness Turn to Light? It’s a priest considering what happened three years ago. The world is covered in darkness — railing against it does nothing (though we have to know what it is). Easter must mean more to us now and forever more — we have to let Christ’s sacrifice and redemption enter into us; we must allow Him to change us.
Michael Brendan Dougherty: Make Priests Wear Black Again!
The Norbertine Fathers of St. Michael’s Abbey are live-streaming their Tenebrae services (our dear friend Patrick Cross has entered there, so we are particularly drawn to watch at least some of it! It’s very beautiful).
from the archives
Remember — especially if you are new here — I have hundreds of posts aimed at helping you commit to becoming competent in homemaking and knowing why you should! I post here now to offer some daily doings, but all my “how-tos” are archived here on the blog and organized into my 3-volume set, The Summa Domestica!
To be happy at home!Particular ways to show respect for the father of the family!
follow us everywhere! share us with your friends!
My book, The Summa Domestica: Order and Wonder in Family Life is available now from Sophia Press! All the thoughts from this blog collected into three volumes, beautifully presented with illustrations from Deirdre, an index in each volume, and ribbons!
My “random thoughts no pictures” blog, Happy Despite Them — receive it by email if you like, or bookmark, so you don’t miss a thing!
My new podcast can be found on the Restoration of Christian Culture website (and you can find it where you listen to such things) — be sure to check out the other offerings there!
Stay abreast of the posts here at LMLD, when they happen:
Consider subscribing to this blog by email. In the current situation, if we can’t meet here, it would be good for us to be connected by email!
We share pretty pictures: Auntie Leila’s Instagram, Rosie’s Instagram, Deirdre’s Instagram. Bridget’s Instagram.
Auntie Leila’s Facebook (you can just follow)
The boards of the others: Rosie’s Pinterest. Sukie’s Pinterest. Deirdre’s Pinterest. Habou’s Pinterest (you can still get a lot of inspiration here! and say a prayer for her!). Bridget’s Pinterest.
The post Easter Chitchat and Love! appeared first on Like Mother, Like Daughter.
April 1, 2023
Very linky!
A rare moment of morning sunlight… I am longing for Spring, aren’t you? Or do you live somewhere where it’s already been sunny and warm?
I have lots of links for you today! Be sure to click on them, because you won’t want to miss all my recommendations for your reading!
So let’s do a quick —
Bread Corner
If you implement my tips one at a time, you’ll be able to see improvement in your bread and understand a bit more about why these things help. If you click on the “sourdough tips” tag, it will take you to the posts.
I’m going in order of making the dough. Don’t be impatient! Little by little…
But I may circle back and go over previous steps…
But for now:
Try adding a bit of diastatic malt powder (I usually add 1 tablespoon for a batch of dough yielding 4 loaves as you see here) and barley malt syrup (1 tablespoon also).
(A bit the worse for wear at this point! You can buy them here)
Add a small portion of “scalded flour” or leftover porridge or cooked oats to your dough. Often I put 1/4 cup or so of semolina in a bowl and pour boiling water over it, whisking as I pour to avoid lumps.
Shortly thereafter, you can add some of your recipe’s cold liquid to that bowl, whisk, and add to your dough. A lot of the recipes that use this method have you wait until it cools, but that’s not necessary if you do it this way.
A small amount of dried milk powder whisked in at this point also makes the loaf’s crumb light and fluffy, but of course, then you have gone beyond the “flour, water, salt” formula for sourdough. Which is fine.
Here I made two sourdough loaves of the usual boule shape, and also made two sandwich loaves, just to have tucked in my freezer.
I don’t have a picture of the crumb of this bake, but it was among the best — I was so happy, because good bread is a delight and it gives great satisfaction to know how to make it!
Knitting CornerI am attempting my first stranded work, a pair of Selbu Norwegian mittens.
The learning curve is steep!
But I erred in that I carefully made a swatch but forgot that when I am using two different yarns, intertwined this way, the fabric will have a smaller gauge.
So these mittens are… small. I contemplated ripping them back and starting again, but I couldn’t bear it, so some little granddaughter is getting a fancy pair of mittens!
Okay, on to our links! Be sure to click them — they are so interesting this week!
bits & piecesGoing to church with little children — there are some things that are harder, but not many…
Anyone who knows Auntie Leila knows I hate LEDs in living spaces. This article tells why they are so bad (for one thing, who even knows how much light you are getting; for another, they suddenly work, but not at all well, and it’s impossible to tell when that will happen or even necessarily notice, except that your life is getting really dreary and people are depressed as soon as they walk in your house, but it’s fine, the government will take care of you) (I don’t agree with one assumption in the article, that the fact that incandescents’ energy in large part goes to heat is a terrible waste or pointless. It’s just how they work, and for most of the year, their heat, little as it is, is offsetting the heat needed otherwise, so it’s a wash, and on hot days we don’t turn our lights on anyway. Your oven “wastes” a lot of heat too, but I don’t think any of us are going to start making all our bread in the microwave or using the slow cooker exclusively! Our life would be so poor, bleak, and dreary!)
Speaking of churches, I look forward to visiting these magnificent temples
You know I love all things C. S. Lewis
I thought this essay was incredibly insightful. Sometimes an author just cuts to the heart of things….
from the archivesModesty is important, but let’s not go overboard
Consistency in discipline — put in the effort, see the results
follow us everywhere! share us with your friends!
My book, The Summa Domestica: Order and Wonder in Family Life is available now from Sophia Press! All the thoughts from this blog collected into three volumes, beautifully presented with illustrations from Deirdre, an index in each volume, and ribbons!
My “random thoughts no pictures” blog, Happy Despite Them — receive it by email if you like, or bookmark, so you don’t miss a thing!
My new podcast can be found on the Restoration of Christian Culture website (and you can find it where you listen to such things) — be sure to check out the other offerings there!
Stay abreast of the posts here at LMLD, when they happen:
Consider subscribing to this blog by email. In the current situation, if we can’t meet here, it would be good for us to be connected by email!
We share pretty pictures: Auntie Leila’s Instagram, Rosie’s Instagram, Deirdre’s Instagram. Bridget’s Instagram.
Auntie Leila’s Facebook (you can just follow)
The boards of the others: Rosie’s Pinterest. Sukie’s Pinterest. Deirdre’s Pinterest. Habou’s Pinterest (you can still get a lot of inspiration here! and say a prayer for her!). Bridget’s Pinterest.
The post Very linky! appeared first on Like Mother, Like Daughter.
March 25, 2023
Winter Sowing et al.
NB: I guess I randomly checked some box to remove the comment section from the previous two posts. My tech support (Rosie) went in and unchecked them performed remedial operations, so now you can leave a comment over there if you like!
I’m showing my knitting and gardening and bread making in their respective “corners,” even though I’m not an expert at any of it!
I used to have a post tag “If I can do it so can you.” You can still see it over there in the category menu.
I abandoned it as useless, since every single post could have this tag. This whole blog is one big “If I can do it, so can you!”
My intuition is that the relentless attack on homemaking over the past 50 or 60 years has resulted in a crisis of competence, since homemaking does involve using your mind, solving problems, and acquiring skills, combined with a fear that one will be consigned to a life of drudgery if one embraces the challenge.
A bit paradoxical, I think. And unfounded. Let’s have the confidence to flounder about a bit (accepting Chesterton’s advice about things worth doing being worth doing badly) and recover the collective memory!
Then our children will learn and do along with us (and often better become better at whatever it is and quickly take over, leaving us more time to read and knit). Occasionally I see some comment about how this or that skill should be taught in school. Well, some should. But not all could, and if the attempt were made, the academic curriculum would suffer, but I digress.
I once heard in a radio interview, an Indian gentleman describing his profession as having “job satisfaction extremely very high” — and that’s how I think of keeping the home!
Gardening Corner
If you haven’t already, time to do some winter sowing! It’s the easiest way to start seeds. (I’m in zone 6a, FYI.)
Gather your containers:
These veggie containers already have drainage holes:
The milk jugs need some added, and be sure to put some on the lower sides as well as the bottoms, and I find that the wood-burning tool works great.
Use well wetted potting mix, about 3-4″ in each container, and sow the seeds according to the directions. Some seeds need to be scarified and/or soaked, and some need to be covered with soil, while others need sun and should just be sprinkled on top. The packet will tell you.
Milk jugs will need to be duct-taped shut. Use an “extreme” sharpie to record the seed variety (not the regular kind of sharpie, which will wash away, and then you will be ignorant as to contents and rue the day).
Set outside where they can drain (last year I made the mistake of putting them in trays on the deck, where they got sodden; on the ground is better) and are not sheltered from sun or rain. However, if it gets hot, you will have to open them up or stick them in the shade. Other than that, they are pretty maintenance-free! When the seeds are ready, they will sprout and grow, ready to be planted out when the time is ripe. Another benefit is that they don’t have to be hardened off!
Bread Corner
In this post I gave you a tip about your starter.
I hope you have incorporated it in your routine. For your next batch, try this:
Let your dough rest once you’ve mixed it — whether you are using sourdough starter or yeast. Just let it rest for 20 or so minutes. Especially if you are using any whole grains, the particles have sharp edges — a rest allows the edges to absorb water and soften. Gluten begins developing and the chains will align themselves and make your task easier after this rest.
I do very little kneading, mainly relying on a series of rests, of which this is the first.
This little rest is not autolyse, technically, because technically that involves another step of hydrating the flour with the liquid of the recipe before adding the starter and salt; but for home baking where you are trying to get a lot of bread baked without a bunch of steps while also doing laundry, teaching someone to read, and nursing a baby, I think it works in a similar way and saves a step.
Knitting Corner
I love these wrist warmers I made a few years ago (the details are on my Ravelry). It’s actually ridiculous how much I love them!
I have discovered something (besides layering and keeping your core warm): keeping your wrists and ankles toasty goes a long way to reconciling you to winter and even a cold, gray, and wet early Spring day like today! So yes, swath yourself in woolens!
I wish I had known this long ago!
I had two little balls leftover from some long-ago mitten project, I guess? I don’t know what this yarn is other than nice wool in a good color:
A quick project, knitting just as much of the pattern as uses up the yarn, motivated by having organized my yarn stash a few weeks ago, including finally going through my mother’s stash as well. I have no idea how we had so many projects!
Are you knitting or doing some other craft these days? Planning a garden? I’d love to hear about it!
bits & piecesThis little post on “attractive utility” has a good point about how junky stuff begets purely decorative stuff, leading to annoying visual clutter and subsequently, I would add, the reaction to that: minimalism. Puts me in mind of my distinction between clutter and “curated abundance” and offers another perspective on “putting my pretty things about me,” a good and low-stress way to think about decorating.
Leila Miller on The Hidden Martyrs of Marriage
My husband studied under Joseph Cropsey, a student of Leo Strauss, at the University of Chicago. I was moved by Strauss’ reaction to the death of Winston Churchill. Magnanimity is an almost forgotten virtue in its various manifestations — in public life and in the bestowal of riches.
‘Easy-peasy,’ ‘Jiggery-pokery,’ and 10 More Reduplicatives A fun article for word aficionados. It mentions the reduplicative hocus-pocus in passing, but fails to point out its origin as a derogative, anti-Catholic term mocking the Latin words of Consecration at Mass: Hoc est Corpus Meum, This is My Body ((Matthew 26: 26-28, Mark 14: 22-24 and Luke 22: 19-20).
(Back in the day, my husband reacted quite negatively to the title of the children’s movie, Hocus Pocus — and rightly so, as it and especially its sequel are full of occult symbols and themes.)
from the archivesHow I organize and store my seeds (not the method you might have seen elsewhere) Ask Auntie Leila: Control-Freak MamaToddler Life
liturgical living
Today is a Solemnity! Enjoy! The Annunciation of the Lord
follow us everywhere! share us with your friends!
My book, The Summa Domestica: Order and Wonder in Family Life is available now from Sophia Press! All the thoughts from this blog collected into three volumes, beautifully presented with illustrations from Deirdre, an index in each volume, and ribbons!
My “random thoughts no pictures” blog, Happy Despite Them — receive it by email if you like, or bookmark, so you don’t miss a thing!
My new podcast can be found on the Restoration of Christian Culture website (and you can find it where you listen to such things) — be sure to check out the other offerings there!
Stay abreast of the posts here at LMLD, when they happen:
Consider subscribing to this blog by email. In the current situation, if we can’t meet here, it would be good for us to be connected by email!
We share pretty pictures: Auntie Leila’s Instagram, Rosie’s Instagram, Deirdre’s Instagram. Bridget’s Instagram.
Auntie Leila’s Facebook (you can just follow)
The boards of the others: Rosie’s Pinterest. Sukie’s Pinterest. Deirdre’s Pinterest. Habou’s Pinterest (you can still get a lot of inspiration here! and say a prayer for her!). Bridget’s Pinterest.
The post Winter Sowing et al. appeared first on Like Mother, Like Daughter.
March 18, 2023
The light is coming around
Sometimes, as the season changes and the sun comes around, the light comes in of a morning and I try to capture it. I don’t have the right camera (I do, but my computer set-up has changed) to do it justice, but maybe you can imagine along with me as the mood lifts …
My bedroom faces northeast, so despite having four large windows, the sun is not often actually streaming in here…
If I remember not to be too random, I think I will start some corners here that you can easily skip if you are not interested. Knitting corner, gardening corner, sewing corner, bread corner — whatever my latest obsession, I will corner it so you can be warned!
Right now, we have —
Knitting CornerOn IG I posted my uncertainty that my button jar would yield five matching buttons of the right size for this little sleeveless sweater I made for Odelia.
She is 4 1/2 and was looking at pictures of herself at two, wearing this same sort of sweater I had made for her back then. Actually, I made it when she was one, but the yarn was stretchy and she wore it for quite a while!
I am learning about what kinds of yarn are best for each project, and I still have a long way to go before I figure it out. Knitting has a lot of learning curves, in fact, especially for an impulsive buyer and crafter like me.
I’m also working on a better tensioning in my purl rows. Experienced knitters will see that I definitely got better as I went down the body of this sweater. Or maybe I will try making such things in the round and then steeking!
Anyway, Odelia told Deirdre that she wished she was two again, so that she could wear that sweater, so of course I had to make her one that fits her now!
I did find buttons in the jar that holds white ones. This pattern calls for three buttonholes in the yoke (and I followed the directions exactly — next time I will space them better!). I wanted to add more so that it would close all the way if needed.
But that choice puts pressure on my very much helter-skelter button collection! One million buttons, very few of which match each other…
I sort them (and have had various children and grandchildren over the years sort and re-sort — an excellent activity for them) by black, white, colorful, and real shell buttons (the smaller jar in front).
The latter are expensive, hard to find, and delightful. If I am discarding a garment with shell buttons, I take them off and pop them into this jar (hopefully on a safety pin or with a thread through them, to keep them together).
I would even buy something at a thrift store just for the buttons, if they were shell (or real leather, or pretty metal — somewhere else I have a small jar of brass buttons).
How do you tell for sure if a button is real shell? Bite it! Plastic buttons are room temperature and soft. Shell buttons are hard and colder!
I think these buttons work (they are plastic and have a nice depth to the color). Well, it’s what I have! Next time I might do a zipper anyway. I put a zipper in a sweater I made for myself (that I have yet to show you, I think), and it was much easier than I thought it would be!
This little sweater is Marianna’s All-in-One Sleeveless Top. The yarn is Berroco Ultra Wool DK* in Peony. Details, with my changes, on Ravelry.
*But I think superwash is also stretchy… on the one hand, it will grow with her or at least not shrink. On the other, I have read that it’s not the best choice for children, due to staining. Like I said, still learning!
bits & piecesMy friend Patricia sent this one around: Young Irish brothers dancing!My Chicago-area readers will perhaps be familiar with this school, and its founder, who envisioned a unique educational club for adventure and imagination. But don’t be disheartened if this unique model is not near you. Instead, be inspired to offer and support, in your family and your community, education steeped in classical texts and oriented to nature and real festivity. This sort of thing takes many forms, not just one, but the main thing is to give children a connection to the past and lots of freedom within a firm structure of family and church. (“But how do I do that?” you ask? That’s what I’m here for! Let me write you a blog! Or –My Summa Domestica helps you figure out all the details.)
Having trouble getting your child to practice his musical instrument? Maybe spend some time with Hilary Hahn, concert violinist, in her#100daysofpractice series on IG. She films herself really practicing — the nitty-gritty work of it.
“I know exactly what Critical Race Theory is and I’m against it.”
Weatherproof wood with shou sugi ban, and skip the pressure-treated? from the archivesI have so much about what reading is best for children’s imaginations here on the blog — just look at the education and book categories. This post offers the perspective of the headmaster of a boys’ school in the same spirit: 10 Books Every Boy Should Hazard.
Real festivity
The liturgical year sorts out all your worries, including in education
liturgical living
St. Cyril, Bishop of Jerusalem
follow us everywhere! share us with your friends!
My book, The Summa Domestica: Order and Wonder in Family Life is available now from Sophia Press! All the thoughts from this blog collected into three volumes, beautifully presented with illustrations from Deirdre, an index in each volume, and ribbons!
My “random thoughts no pictures” blog, Happy Despite Them — receive it by email if you like, or bookmark, so you don’t miss a thing!
My new podcast can be found on the Restoration of Christian Culture website (and you can find it where you listen to such things) — be sure to check out the other offerings there!
Stay abreast of the posts here at LMLD, when they happen:
Consider subscribing to this blog by email. In the current situation, if we can’t meet here, it would be good for us to be connected by email!
We share pretty pictures: Auntie Leila’s Instagram, Rosie’s Instagram, Deirdre’s Instagram. Bridget’s Instagram.
Auntie Leila’s Facebook (you can just follow)
The boards of the others: Rosie’s Pinterest. Sukie’s Pinterest. Deirdre’s Pinterest. Habou’s Pinterest (you can still get a lot of inspiration here! and say a prayer for her!). Bridget’s Pinterest.
The post The light is coming around appeared first on Like Mother, Like Daughter.
March 11, 2023
The earth revolved a bit and I revived
PSA: We will be traveling from Massachusetts to southeastern Virginia in early May. If you have been wishing that I and/or my husband could talk to your group and it’s on the general route, shoot me an email at LMLDblog@gmail.com! We can perhaps set something up with a good solid discount!
Last week I saw the snowdrops outside my husband’s study window!
Then the other day, the sun came around and I just was able to feel the sap rising in my own soul. I put down my knitting (for a bit) and emerged from my nest on the sofa. I was able to accomplish a little tidying, cleaning, and organizing without feeling like a zek in a particularly vitiating corner of the gulag.
I even worked on a little sewing project.
A little tote for my daughter-in-law Jaime. Maybe the straps are too long though…
The sewing room is coming along. I bought several of those battery-operated lights that you push (but two have a remote with a timer, which I think will come in handy) for the closet so I could organize some supplies, which is just hard to do when you actually can’t see.
This house has a fair number of closets, for an older house, but the electrical outlets are few and far between.
(In that box are vintage wall sconces for the room, but I am awaiting an electrician — and it seems I will wait a long time!)
What’s unusual about my house, I think, is that one of each bedroom’s closets connects to the room next to it. So here, below, you are looking into the sewing-room closet and at the door that connects into another bedroom. Maybe it was to provide another way out in case of fire? The bedrooms all have fireplaces too…
And I got my pantry ready for the seed bench.
The floor has those lighter patches because for years (after laying a new flooring), I had two shelves there. Now they are across the way after the most recent re-organization. A friend remarked on Instagram that this room gets moved around the most.
Fair.
But it’s because so much is going on here! The food storage stepped up a lot last year, and now, having gone through a lot of pantry items that I put up in the fall, I have the glass jars to find homes for as well (small portion of the supply pictured here).
As I moved things over to the right side to make room for my (undoubtedly too large) seed bench, I tidied, cleaned, and re-arranged the canned goods and so on.
I used to think you would just set up your pantry and, like a grocery store, things would remain in place. I have to give myself permission to move things all around (though there is a danger that I will then forget about them, because I am very visual! As you can tell!).
For two months or so, things will be pretty tight in here. But it’s fine. I love it! It’s not picture-perfect, but it works for me and when the seeds are finally moved outside, I’ll clean and re-organize again, and how roomy it will all feel!
I keep telling myself that the little white table does not need to be in the pantry, for the love–
but a) I don’t have anywhere else for it and b) it’s handy, every day, for putting things down while I am going to and fro!
bits & piecesHow to use your dishwasher better. Do find out if your water is hard or soft, if you don’t know. Soft-water places need far less detergent, so pods are maybe not the best choice. A repairman told my friend that it’s better anyway to use far, far less detergent than you think. Here in our hard-water area he said a squirt the size of a quarter! What do you think about putting vinegar in the rinse receptacle? We have residue that is taken away by vinegar, but I don’t know if the machine dispenses it correctly.The Church as a Barnacle-Encrusted Ship
My podcast with Leila Miller is up on the Center site now! We talked at length about why marriage prep in the Church is not what it ought to be.
Go here for all the podcasts.
A friend told me that this website, Springs in the Desert, is solace for those who carry the burden of infertility.
A star-shaped fort in The Netherlands — Fort Bourtange. It’s really beautiful — a military garden! My son Will remarked, “Our intricate and expertly maintained floral moat will surely protect us from all harm — our enemy will either get lost in the design or the beauty…”
As the primary educators of their children, especially in the moral life, parents must understand the workings of conscience, which can warn, accuse, and, if not heeded, wreak vengeance.
This article by the philosopher J. Budziszewski focuses on abortion, but the vengeful conscience will cause harm if any sin is indulged long enough. The evidence is all around us, and we need to protect our children from that fate (and avoid it ourselves!) — sorrow, repentance, and a firm amendment with God’s help is the way! It is for this that Christ died on the cross!
And of course, pray for your children and be patientBe that one leper: Michael Pakaluk on giving thanks
from the archivesThree-year-olds teach us that they are people too (even if they won’t nap)I agree that minding what we eat is important. But it’s not the most important thing, nor is everything sold as healthy as we might think it is.
liturgical living
St. Eulogius of Cordoba, St. Sophronius
The novena to St. Joseph begins today!
follow us everywhere! share us with your friends!
My book, The Summa Domestica: Order and Wonder in Family Life is available now from Sophia Press! All the thoughts from this blog collected into three volumes, beautifully presented with illustrations from Deirdre, an index in each volume, and ribbons!
My “random thoughts no pictures” blog, Happy Despite Them — receive it by email if you like, or bookmark, so you don’t miss a thing!
My new podcast can be found on the Restoration of Christian Culture website (and you can find it where you listen to such things) — be sure to check out the other offerings there!
Stay abreast of the posts here at LMLD, when they happen:
Consider subscribing to this blog by email. In the current situation, if we can’t meet here, it would be good for us to be connected by email!
We share pretty pictures: Auntie Leila’s Instagram, Rosie’s Instagram, Deirdre’s Instagram. Bridget’s Instagram.
Auntie Leila’s Facebook (you can just follow)
The boards of the others: Rosie’s Pinterest. Sukie’s Pinterest. Deirdre’s Pinterest. Habou’s Pinterest (you can still get a lot of inspiration here! and say a prayer for her!). Bridget’s Pinterest.
The post The earth revolved a bit and I revived appeared first on Like Mother, Like Daughter.
March 4, 2023
Chatty: Sourdough and new babies
I’m having a little trouble gathering my thoughts in a any sort of system for today’s post, so we’ll make this chatty, sound good?
I only have these bread pictures, which I already did post on Instagram, so forgive me:
I will try to give you some sourdough tips little by little (following up on this post), if you are interested in getting better at sourdough bread baking.
Everyone’s method sounds definitive, but conditions are so different; as you are flitting from tip to tip out there in the wild, resolve to try them, but not be wedded to them until you get the result you are looking for. (And to know what to look for, every once in a while buy a really good loaf of artisan sourdough if you have any available to you, and make note of its characteristics if you love it.)
Today’s tip that works for me — see if it helps you:
Try making your starter a bit stiffer. The usual recommendation is for your feeding ratio is one part starter to one part flour and one part water, by weight.
What works better for me is one part starter, one part water, and one and enough more of flour, added little by little, to make the dough stiff enough that you have to work the flour in somewhat, but it all gets incorporated. (I use a flat whisk like this one because it fits in my large-mouth mason jar – affiliate link.)
Let it rise until it’s bubbly and domed but not so squishy that it looks like it is losing its ability to stay domed. If it falls, just feed it again and try to catch it at its height.
Then when you are making your levain preparatory to mixing your dough, mix in enough water with a small amount of starter (100-200 grams, 1/4-1/2 cup) to make a mixture with flour that will be easy to incorporate with the rest of your ingredients once it has risen — more like one part starter, two parts water, one part flour. Let that bubble, then continue. Having a greater proportion of levain in your dough is helpful in colder weather, by the way.
The stiffer starter results in a less sour loaf (especially if you rise it in a warm environment — the colder and slower, the more sour).
And know that everyone has their days with their dough falling into ruin!
I got this Ask Auntie Leila question:
How do you remember what to do with babies when you get a new one? I’m on my fifth boy, with only two years since my last baby was born, and I’m still forgetting all sorts of things like how milk let down works, the amount of fever that necessitates an ER trip with a newborn, and most importantly, the HUGE necessity of doing the most important thing, not the appealing most frivolous thing, the moment that the baby’s asleep. I thought I had a method – I keep a binder with notes by subject on meals, cleaning, kid fun, holiday recipes and to-do’s, baby notes. However, there must be a better way! And I bet you’ve probably found it with your seven, or your girls have. Has anyone figured out how to keep “life with baby” notes that transcend the fog of mommy brain?
We’re five weeks out. It was a lovely postpartum with husband working from home and lots of grandmother help. However, it feels like it’s time for me to at least be able to heat up leftovers for folks, direct the kids to their chores and school, and take the reins of the house back from my tired and wonderful husband. I just keep on stumbling on my own forgetfulness. Maybe it’s like re-learning how to knit for the umpteenth time, goes a bit faster. Your posts have been just wonderful for encouragement and good reminders. I read them again and again with enjoyment. And when the blog was down, how I treasured extra my Summa Domestica books! Thank you!
God bless you and your wonderful family! We’re very thankful for you and your good words.
Love,
Sarah
You’re welcome, Sarah! Thank you for your kind words!
This continual learning curve is why I wrote my books. Even those with experience keep needing reminding! I tell about how with my later kids I was grateful for reminders from friends: “nurse her before you get in the car” — nurses: “he’s fussy because he’s cold — warm him up!” — and doctors: the one at our town clinic, channeling her inner grandma rather than any medical training, who berated me for not having a playpen — she was really old-school and basically said, “you need a 1/2 hour in the morning and a 1/2 hour before supper with baby in the playpen if you want any sanity.”
My first thought: Does she know how many kids I have? (Six at the time). My second thought: Brilliant! This is happening!
Not to mention (in the department of getting back into the groove of life with lots of kids), make your menus, know what you are having by 10 am so you can defrost, soak, etc., and keep the laundry going. All of those thoughts are accessible in the menu and search bars here.
Oh, and my friend Shyla reminded me of this book, regarding the “when to call the doctor” question, and I urge you all to purchase a copy, because it’s gold: How to Raise a Healthy Child in Spite of Your Doctor: One of America’s Leading Pediatricians Puts Parents Back in Control of Their Children’s Health by Robert S. Mendelsohn, MD. It’s available used, and you should order a copy STAT.
I link to my practical advice below, in from the archives.
Relatedly and randomly:
Let me remind you, all of you: don’t cover your baby’s face with anything. Breathing is an actual thing — oxygen is a human right, even for babies…
Don’t know where this trend started, but it’s escalated beyond reason. I’m having a hard time with it.
It’s one thing to drape a light, gauzy receiving blanket over the handle of the carseat or stroller to keep the sun, overhead lights, or stiff breeze off your baby, with plenty of airflow on the sides and lots directly above his nose. It’s another to use that heavy double-sided minky and fleece quilt, and quite another to close the quilted sleep sack liner of the carseat over his face.
Early on in the pandemic I encountered a woman whose stroller was totally encased in heavy plastic. Auntie Leila says no.
Okay, that could have been three posts, but you are used to me!
bits & piecesMy friend Jana, remembering that I have posted in the past about folk dances, line dances, traditional dances, sends these Rebecca Stout videos, simple, charming, and easy to follow, to help with getting started. You just need one or two people who are experienced with folk dancing to join you and get your little community prancing about!
And this lovely, refined one for good measure.
(Note that the music makes sense with the dance. We don’t dance anymore, so these pieces — helpfully named danse, courante, sarabande, allemande, gigue, and so on — can seem strangely stilted or even boring when listened to on their own, without the accompanying movements. Something to consider when studying them in the curriculum or listening to them for pleasure.)
A fun sampling of traditional folk music, from the band called Shake That Little Foot, from the 30s!I struggled with helping one of my children with eczema and asthma (two of them with that condition). Here is a round-up of studies that might have helped me back then: Raw Cow’s Milk and Its Protective Effect on Allergies and Asthma. Do you have any experience with this? I think it’s better to give a weaning child (over the age of 10 months or so) raw or lightly pasteurized milk (180° vs. in the 300s) than formula. (Before you comment — as you know, I am a big advocate of breastfeeding and baby-led weaning. Some babies wean themselves surprisingly early despite all efforts, and sometimes mom gets pregnant and her milk wanes. I have lots of posts about these things — here I am talking about what to do with an older baby who has weaned and of course toddlers and older children too. The current recommendations are to hold off cow’s milk until a year. In my experience, it could be given at around 10 months if raw or near-raw, and I have a couple of posts about tested, cow’s milk–based home-made formula here. The information includes a discussion about the risk of allergy to cow’s milk. Please read all that before commenting and I think you will find your concern is answered. I’m not a medical professional of course, so use your judgement.)
We had talked about Kitchenaids but wow, find a used one. This makes me angry, really.
Do you know about ESG? If you’re wondering how we are surrounded by rainbow everything, and why angry letters won’t help, read this.
“The most important tool for accomplishing this strategy is environmental, social, and governance (ESG) standards, a new framework for evaluating businesses. Under an ESG model, which has already been widely adopted by corporate America, companies are rewarded or punished based on how they score on dozens of metrics developed by bankers, investors, activists, and, in some cases, government officials.
Let’s go back to Biblical morality and natural law, because the alternative is brain-dead mothers acting as surrogates for traffickers in human flesh (this isn’t a horror movie, this is what is in store for us, as a logical consequence of having taken childbearing out of the marital act).Brad Emery subjects all the beloved children’s classics to the Roald Dahl standard, and the results are hilarious!
Leila Miller writes about what to do if your little boy says he’s a girl. Calm, common sense from an experienced mom in these confusing days! Her books are linked in that article; they are practical and help you not panic.
from the archivesAs promised above, How to care for your sick child at home. Know what is meant by a bland diet! Comes in very handy as all these stomach bugs are going around. Your recovering child needs to eat certain things and not eat other things, and then he will recover quicker.
liturgical living
follow us everywhere! share us with your friends!
My book, The Summa Domestica: Order and Wonder in Family Life is available now from Sophia Press! All the thoughts from this blog collected into three volumes, beautifully presented with illustrations from Deirdre, an index in each volume, and ribbons!
My “random thoughts no pictures” blog, Happy Despite Them — receive it by email if you like, or bookmark, so you don’t miss a thing!
My new podcast can be found on the Restoration of Christian Culture website (and you can find it where you listen to such things) — be sure to check out the other offerings there!
Stay abreast of the posts here at LMLD, when they happen:
Consider subscribing to this blog by email. In the current situation, if we can’t meet here, it would be good for us to be connected by email!
We share pretty pictures: Auntie Leila’s Instagram, Rosie’s Instagram, Deirdre’s Instagram. Bridget’s Instagram.
Auntie Leila’s Facebook (you can just follow)
The boards of the others: Rosie’s Pinterest. Sukie’s Pinterest. Deirdre’s Pinterest. Habou’s Pinterest (you can still get a lot of inspiration here! and say a prayer for her!). Bridget’s Pinterest.
The post Chatty: Sourdough and new babies appeared first on Like Mother, Like Daughter.
February 25, 2023
Ask Auntie Leila: Cheerfulness
Dear Jenni writes:
Dear Auntie Leila,
Please share how you stay cheerful.
Thank you,
Jenni
Dear Jenni,
I had to chuckle at this question, first, because it was certainly an examination of conscience! “Am I cheerful??” “Do I stay cheerful??”
It assumes a lot — about me!
Second, because I was instantly thrown into one of those “I would have to write a three-volume work to answer this question” situations, so it took me a while to respond with a “I’ll answer you on the blog!”
But let’s keep it snappy.
To “remain” (God willing!) cheerful, even in the midst of suffering and undeniable misfortune that is our lot, at least occasionally, here on earth, not to mention the darkness we all sense pressing down on us, we need to know that our true home is not here.
And in heaven, everyone is surely cheerful!
Good cheer is a matter of the rock-solid foundation under the storm clouds, roiling waters, and even murky depths of life. That solid foundation is and must be faith in God and His goodness, and in our sure knowledge that His desire to have us with Him.
Practically, allow me, in the humblest way possible, to offer a few things to think about this Lent, if we find ourselves less than cheerful. Who, me??
Don’t let the late winter season get you down, if you live anywhere where Spring seems far off. Remind yourself that it will be here soon and this time is a good one to attend to a few indoor matters, such as these:
Make things Reasonably Clean, Fairly Neat, and Comfortably Tidy. Go over the archives to understand how to do this without becoming overwhelmed, and start with your own bedroom.
Know, if you are homeschooling especially, that February Blues happen everywhere, even in “the best” schools. Experiencing them is not a failure, and the cure is a little change of pace and, again, a good tidy, with a focus on the school areas and supplies.
Creativity is important to well being. This Lent — like, this weekend — do something to line up a creative activity for yourself that can be easily picked up and put down or tackled for a half hour here and there; something that you enjoy, that energizes you.
My cheerfulness soars when I have spent even a few minutes each day in some creative endeavor or even in clearing the decks to get ready for that creative endeavor.
I observe women chafe and begin to think that leaving home for outside work is the solution to their boredom and sadness, when really, it’s that they haven’t given their feminine urge to make beauty around them a chance.
Here we pause for a Finished Knitted Object (actually two), since I’m always posting things in process or even in the very usual state of being ripped out, as I am an avid but not terribly fast or good knitter:
I did make a lot of mittens and even a sweater for me last year, but neglected to share them. This little set is for my new granddaughter, Veronica. I hope it fits her! I have been practicing…
I will put my notes over on Ravelry soon.
I hasten to add, though: I don’t mean beauty in any necessarily unreachable or expensive way, but in the sense of creating a fittingness and order just where you are, to radiate care and love.
Order and wonder are qualities that the woman of the home provides and will make her and those around her more cheerful.
Use social media for what it’s really good at (vs. inciting your comparison appetite or making you discontent): giving you ideas and visuals for living more frugally and creatively; for, as Chesterton says, thrift is the true adventure, and what is more cheering than an adventure?
The cheerfulness quotient is higher when we are, with a vigorous heart, making do. There is so much available to help you figure out how to use what you have more wisely, which in turn will help you feel confident.
Cheerfulness is not for victims — it’s for those who accept the situation and see what they can do to make it better, patiently. Seeing how others do this is so helpful, so yay internet for that!
Drop the habit of glumness that may even have been picked up in early childhood. Sparkle up your eyes and your emotions may very well follow.
Don’t confuse the natural cheerfulness some are born with and the interior decision to be cheerful due to the love God has for us, a love so strong that He accepted death on a cross for it, for me, for you; this latter kind of cheerfulness can be made into a new habit, reflected in our very face, and we owe it in charity to others to at least try to obtain it!
Cultivate a sense of humor. Practice finding the funny side of things. Don’t laugh immoderately, of course, but do be ready to chuckle.
Imitate the people you know who have the charming ability to make fun of themselves! Have you done something dumb? Learn to say, out loud, “Well, that was dumb!” Some mental illness can be cleared up with the willingness readily to admit that indeed, I am not perfect.
Learn merriment in your expressions and forego the tendency to moan and groan. I know I appreciate a person who greets me with a smile and even a loving inflection in speaking my name; it would be loving my neighbors to offer them the same warmth.
Ladies, be less emotive. Social media rewards those who are emotional and most of that emotionalism is aimed at women. Spot its manipulations in its catchphrases and bywords. Don’t contribute to it.
Those with a good sense of humor can mount a defense, a defense that is necessary because the problem with indulging your emotions is that the sad, tearful ones get way more mileage with those willing to entertain them, so you just get… sadder!
Sadness is inevitable and appropriate, but take care to remind yourself and others by your reactions that there is light.
Get up and walk around — go outside! Everyone urges us to do this, so I won’t dwell on it, but often we all need what Rosie calls “an attitude adjustment walk.” If we are here in the icy North, it may be a walk around the house, but whatever it is, let’s get moving. Certainly, plan your garden if at all possible! Gardening gets me outside (as do the chickens) and is a life-saver.
Let us be merry, even in adversity — especially in adversity!
Tell us in the comments, if you would, what you do to have a holy cheerfulness!
“Grant me a heart that knows nothing of boredom, weeping and sighing. Let me not be concerned with the bothersome thing I call ‘myself’. Lord, give me a sense of humor and I will find happiness in life and profit for others.” – St. Thomas More
bits & piecesThe Hidden Life of St. Thomas More, apostle of cheerfulness
My friend Paul Jernberg posted the video of the Mass for Persecuted Christians from last fall, offered in my own parish church. It features his compositions and a completely sung Novus Ordo Mass. There are some who work hard to bring beauty into this world, and Paul is definitely one of them! I took part in the choir and was greatly moved by the worship, music, and homily. Please remember our brethren in the Middle East.
Resist the scouring of the Shire! In this case, the children’s books of Roald Dahl being reprinted to be super boring and unappealing in their political correctness.
Strangely, it’s no longer urged on Catholics as a precept of the Church to marry only other Catholics and raise their children Catholic.
Two articles of note from our friend Fr. Jerry Pokorsky: Sleep and Death (it’s our Bridget who saw “the Light of the World” out by the gazebo) and his review of my husband’s Fr. Mankowski collection called Diogenes Unveiled, in First Things
Can Lent be over yet? No! Fast (from food) more (just a little)!
Jane Austen, the cheerful author! Yes, we women can overcome the temptation to emotionalism and Be Like Jane: Fr. Longenecker writes, “Where is the feminine genius in all of [what C. S. Lewis sees in Austen]? It is in the fact that the novels are comedies. Jane Austen deals with serious themes lightly. She observes the foolish vanity of her characters with a wry smile and the kind of sharp satirical wit that is feminine through and through. A man writing satire is likely to be sarcastic, overbearing, and cruel. He may deal with such serious themes with a heavy hand, a wordy exposition, or a philosophical speech. A woman dismisses such ponderous sermonizing and scores points with the sly comment, the wicked witticism, and the observation that is damning with faint praise.”from the archivesCreativity goes beyondMrs. Piggle-Wiggle gets a makeover (spoiler: not in a good way)Four Secrets to A Cheerful Home
follow us everywhere! share us with your friends!
My book, The Summa Domestica: Order and Wonder in Family Life is available now from Sophia Press! All the thoughts from this blog collected into three volumes, beautifully presented with illustrations from Deirdre, an index in each volume, and ribbons!
My “random thoughts no pictures” blog, Happy Despite Them — receive it by email if you like, or bookmark, so you don’t miss a thing!
My new podcast can be found on the Restoration of Christian Culture website (and you can find it where you listen to such things) — be sure to check out the other offerings there!
Stay abreast of the posts here at LMLD, when they happen:
Consider subscribing to this blog by email. In the current situation, if we can’t meet here, it would be good for us to be connected by email!
We share pretty pictures: Auntie Leila’s Instagram, Rosie’s Instagram, Deirdre’s Instagram. Bridget’s Instagram.
Auntie Leila’s Facebook (you can just follow)
The boards of the others: Rosie’s Pinterest. Sukie’s Pinterest. Deirdre’s Pinterest. Habou’s Pinterest (you can still get a lot of inspiration here! and say a prayer for her!). Bridget’s Pinterest.
The post Ask Auntie Leila: Cheerfulness appeared first on Like Mother, Like Daughter.
February 20, 2023
Two items for your last-minute Lent prep!
Since I had been posting Lenten reminders since Septuagesima Sunday (and think I have gotten the hang of spelling that), I forgot to give you a nudge this last time about a couple of things to get ready for Ash Wednesday, this Wednesday!
First: I always am a little behind in remembering to get my Hot Cross Buns going, so this is me reminding us both. Hot Cross buns are a memory-forming way to start Lent (as well as to finish it on Good Friday), and traditional here in New England — are they where you are? The bakeries and supermarkets always put them out in this season.
I always did make mine “loaded” for hungry kids who are not going to get any snacks or much in the way of expansive meals on this day, but you can “unload” (leave out eggs and butter) for your own purposes.
As usual, I don’t have a recipe for you, because I just wing it. I am deeply regretful of and apologetic for this tendency universal practice of mine, so unhelpful for someone who has a homemaking blog.
But the basic idea is as follows:
Use any sweet roll recipe (but double or triple for your crowd) and add raisins, dried cranberries, and nuts if everyone can eat them. Use honey if you don’t want to put in sugar, and you can swap mild oil for the butter. Shape rolls — and a new thing I learned: Make crosses with a paste of flour and water, as in this more informative post. Much easier than trying to drizzle sugar glaze on warm buns, and a bit more in keeping with the penitential aspect as well.
I have learned a transformative fact for my baking: cinnamon inhibits yeast growth!
Using excessive amounts [but I have found even reasonable amounts] will delay fermentation and the proofing of dough due to the spice’s antifungal properties. It can also cause the dough not to rise at all. Most of the time, yeast levels have to increase, for example in cinnamon rolls, to compensate.
OH! Every wonder why cinnamon bread has the spice swirled in rather than just added to the dough? Ever wonder why my hot cross buns are sometimes a bit stodgy? A while ago I was experimenting with sourdough waffles, following a recipe for “discard” that I found online, that includes cinnamon in the batter; I found that they were just heavy.
And then I read this startling bit of information about this spice and all became clear. So, note to self: put the cinnamon in the cross if you want to have it, but not in the dough.
Second: Dear Lydia of Fig and Thimble (and here on Instagram) has once again made a beautiful calendar for the family to track the journey. She has given me permission to post them (and you can find them here as well).
I recommend using a bit higher quality paper to print these out, if you happen to have some.
You can get the PDF: Lent 2023. This is the Byzantine version PDF: Lent 2023 Byzantine.
Or you can save these images to your computer for printing by right-clicking the one you want:
Search my Lent archives if you want lots more thoughts on preparation, spiritual as well as practical. Mainly, make or ready your prayer place and live your Lent.
May God bless us in this coming holy season!
The post Two items for your last-minute Lent prep! appeared first on Like Mother, Like Daughter.
February 18, 2023
Ask Auntie Leila: Five Household Items for Single Gals to Get
Hi Auntie Leila!
I’ve been working my way through your Summa Domestica Books. I’m a single woman hoping to marry, and trying to learn as much as I can to prepare myself. While I know we need to focus on living within our means, and making do with what we have, I was wondering if you had a list of products you wish you had when starting the married and family life? Or just things to add to the registry? Even as a single girl I already have a horse and dog and when I read your suggestion about water hog mats, I asked myself where they had been my whole life!!! Would you happen to have a list of these game-changer products that we can either put on our own registries, or give to other couples? Thanks so much!
Ali
Dear Ali,
Well, these are two questions in one — what a single girl could be investing in — a sort of expanded idea of a trousseau, if you will — before marriage, and what would be good to put on the registry.
For the latter question, we do already have a post about that. it’s here: Your marriage is your gift to others; a Guide to Registering.
This post is part of a larger series that Deirdre did on weddings, and I highly recommend that everyone peruse those posts and share them with mothers of the bride and brides and people in general, as wedding prep season begins to gear up! They are all linked here.
But the first part of the question is very interesting to me. I actually get a lot of mail from young ladies who are not yet married but would like prudently to prepare for the day that they step into the role of wife and mother.
When you are single, you still need pots and pans and furniture. They could be temporary, throwaway items or they could be in your virtual hope chest (but you’re already using them), well made and sturdy enough to be a significant contribution to setting up your married household later. What would those items be?
Unexpectedly, Ali mentions water hog mats! I wrote about them here in this post about how the home gets dirty. If you are so frustrated at the sand and grit that’s all over your floors, know that everyone is tracking all that in and you need mats to stop it at the door. This is the kind I like (affiliate link) but you can certainly find them at your local home goods store. They are rugged enough to last for you to bring to your new home. I’m not a fan of the ones with bumps and deep grooves because they are hard to vacuum; I’m always amazed at how much better I feel about life if I just vacuum the mudroom, and who wants that job to be annoying.I think a young lady should invest in and learn to use a sewing machine. It’s a hard item to commit to, money and time-wise, when you have a young family and realize you need one, but a fine purchase for a single person.
There are so very many items for the home and body that are exceedingly simple to sew and quite expensive to buy. Curtains, napkins, duvet covers, pillowcases, skirts, baby blankets… we are talking straight seams and very little time commitment.
It’s the kind of thing you will find second hand in great condition, as many people buy them and don’t use them. And of course, even vintage ones work extremely well.
I like mine a lot* (affiliate link)(but find one second hand)
A Dutch oven. (affiliate link) When you are single, you can make a pot of something (stew, chili, braised whole chicken) and eat it during the week, freezing portions for future use. When you are a married lady, this investment will be something you will always turn to. I see them on FB Marketplace all the time.
Ditto a cast iron pan — however, I urge you to find a vintage one. Poking around in thrift stores will eventually pay off, and the older ones are made with a better process and are much smoother in the interior, leading to better non-stick cooking. Even a sketchy-looking one can be restored with little trouble, and it’s so worth it — there are many how-tos online. Here is my post on how to season and care for your cast iron.
A well made sleep sofa with classic lines and styling. (Here is my “good furniture” board on Pinterest.) When you’re rooming with friends, you may need a sofa; when you’re married with little kids, you probably won’t have a guest room but you will want a comfy place for overnight visitors. At some point, you can demote it when you get a nicer one for your living room, and having a well made sofa in the secondary room helps the housekeeping undburdensome.
Furniture of poor quality demoralizes housekeeping, rendering it a futile, avoided activity. It’s better to buy something good and demote it when you have the space to fill than to get something of low quality later because you have so much furniture to buy. I got an American made sleeper sofa second hand for my rec room; this sort of piece is indestructible due to the heavy-duty microfiber suede-like fabric (which is totally scrubbable and looks great!) and strong construction, and would be a good choice for a single gal, to last forever. You can always replace the mattress, you know!
Cookbooks that teach you how to cook and contain information about food in general, vs. books with a lot of recipes (which are fun, don’t get me wrong). My go-tos, even after all these years, can be found in this post. There are others and they can all be found second-hand! Investing in a Cooks Illustrated general cookbook would be a good way to go. I have never used it, but I have always been impressed when served something made from it!
Bonus:
On IG I have a hashtag — Philsbachelorstuff — about little items that have definitely stood the test of time for me! They are not sexy but they are go-to things in my kitchen for sure — if you find similar things at thrift stores, grab them. I have other things to add and will do so eventually.Readers, what did you get when you were single that you are so glad about now? What do you wish you had invested in because it never seems to be affordable once you have your numerous family? Let us know in the comments!
*My sewing machine works flawlessly and I’ve had it for 10 years. Pros: smooth, trouble-free operation; good choice of stitches; handles thicknesses of fabric; has a needle-threader which became a necessity at the time I bought it, as I had trouble seeing the eye of the needle! Cons: The button to reverse stitch is annoyingly placed on a slant away from the user there on the front of the machine, so it’s hard to distinguish from the other two buttons as it’s not easily in view, yet used all the time; you choose a stitch type by toggling through, which is annoying when there are more than 30 to choose from! Push, push, push, push… dumb. I would prefer a knob that you simply turn to your selection.
bits & piecesI’ve been enjoying the Farmstead Meatsmith. I’m learning more about preserving meat from them. This episode of the podcast has a good discussion about priorities and the hierarchy of goods when making choices about where to live, a subject much visited, here at LMLD and in my inbox.
This article is the first one I’ve come across that explains the real danger of TikTok (just click past the first screen) to our young people — even more than the data collection which is a huge and pressing issue.
The entire app works in a way from which it is difficult to extricate oneself. Yes, any individual post might be of great interest and information to you — a little demonstration of a novel way to cook an egg, for instance. But it’s the next post and the next one and the next one… maybe sort of related but then not related, sucking you in because each one is just a minute or two, taking you to more fun ways to cook eggs but also to people doing degrading (yet perhaps not absolutely immoral though maybe) things… it’s difficult to stop, to say “enough.” The eyes begin to flicker. The brain gets patterned. To a certain extent, Instagram does something similar with reels. Tiktok is nothing but reels, designed to both track use and prod the user into areas of weakness.
I take my stand in saying that any child should not have any device of any kind that connects to the internet (the only exception being the computer out in the open for one or two classes when he’s a teenager — maybe you have an exception but this is my rule). You wouldn’t hand your child or anyone you loved a drug to use at will. That is what TikTok is — a debilitating drug.
If you knit, you may already know about using a lifeline. I thought this tutorial makes it easy to figure out.
If a priest will come to your home to anoint a sick person, you may want to watch this little vintage film to recover the collective memory. Similar to the instructions in it (so delicately offered), when a priest is bringing Holy Communion it would be fitting to have a small table with a cloth and candle as well.
Publishers are busy changing children’s books of the past. (I’m linking to the archived version of this piece that is behind a paywall.) Even when I was a child this was a thing, but mostly to abridge longer stories. It was annoying, though, to find out that you hadn’t actually read this or that book… but now a new edition of a well remembered favorite is likely to be subjected to political correctness or simply flattened out (sometimes in weird and inscrutable ways) and made “easier to read and understand” which means more boring. Buy used books when possible! Of course my LMLD Library Project is what this all about. (See the menu bar above.)
from the archivesHere are some practical thoughts beyond “good stuff” for getting ready for marriage or for the new bride settling into her home, before children come along.
There’s still time to print out My Lenten Rule (do it in the Chrome browser or it won’t come out right) for the whole family, perhaps on heavier than usual paper. My students like to color in the image on the back.
Do you need a Bossiness Cure for a certain child? (There are many more of my discipline ideas in my book, don’t forget!)
liturgical living
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My book, The Summa Domestica: Order and Wonder in Family Life is available now from Sophia Press! All the thoughts from this blog collected into three volumes, beautifully presented with illustrations from Deirdre, an index in each volume, and ribbons!
My “random thoughts no pictures” blog, Happy Despite Them — receive it by email if you like, or bookmark, so you don’t miss a thing!
My new podcast can be found on the Restoration of Christian Culture website (and you can find it where you listen to such things) — be sure to check out the other offerings there!
Stay abreast of the posts here at LMLD, when they happen:
Consider subscribing to this blog by email. In the current situation, if we can’t meet here, it would be good for us to be connected by email!
We share pretty pictures: Auntie Leila’s Instagram, Rosie’s Instagram, Deirdre’s Instagram. Bridget’s Instagram.
Auntie Leila’s Facebook (you can just follow)
The boards of the others: Rosie’s Pinterest. Sukie’s Pinterest. Deirdre’s Pinterest. Habou’s Pinterest (you can still get a lot of inspiration here! and say a prayer for her!). Bridget’s Pinterest.
The post Ask Auntie Leila: Five Household Items for Single Gals to Get appeared first on Like Mother, Like Daughter.
February 11, 2023
This is the Lent to make a little oratory
Without having the bustle of family-life-with-littles to spur me on, I am sluggishly making my way through my (already restrained, by my standards) Christmas decorations, trying to clean up and put them away, but getting distracted/being led into sloth by knitting, bread-baking, and reading — but mostly by it being February…
Yes, the tree is gone (had to be done! I’m not totally irresponsible!), but the long trek to the attic for bins has not yet happened.
I have vacuumed half this room, the side where the tree was (trying to deep-clean as I go, in my defense).
It’s been on my mind, as Lent approaches, to return here to the idea of the little oratory, the special prayer place in the home. Truly, I can’t emphasize enough how important it is that we create a place, however small and humble, however incomplete for now, to draw our eyes to God, to prayer, to our heavenly home.
The icon corner or home altar connects us in the liturgical year to the Church. When we see an image of our crucified Lord, when we see an icon of the Madonna, we are already praying. The oratory changes as we go through the year, reflecting the seasons and what each brings to our spiritual life.
Imagine! Not having to stress so much about “needing to pray,” but already to be there, in conversation with God! Wouldn’t that be easier than what we are doing (or not doing) now?
This is the traditional way, to accept our human nature in its spiritual and material aspects, and in the latter, to offer ourselves the mercy of beautiful images, gathered in one spot, arranged with a loving hand.
In last week’s Post-Communion prayer in the Traditional Latin Mass for Septuagesima Sunday, we were given out of the Church’s treasury this petition:
May Thy faithful people, O God, be strengthened by Thy gifts; that in receiving them, they may seek after them the more, and in seeking them, may receive them for ever.
It struck me how this prayer applies to the gift of beautiful sacred images in the home.
When we see a sacred image, especially one placed in a prayer corner, we receive its meaning as a gift — we simply look at it, and what it signifies enters us, drawing us to what is beyond it, just as when we look out of a window onto a beautiful view, the image enters us and we are drawn to go through and dwell in that landscape. That glance in turn inspires us to seek after it, this gift of God that draws us to Him, and in seeking it, we receive it.
This process is prayer — not a strained act of will against ourselves, but a natural consequence of desire, that is in itself desire’s fulfillment, as we find ourselves already in His grace. To desire to pray is to pray!
All of which is to say, in my own convoluted way, that in this last ten days or so before Lent, you might think of making your own little oratory as a new beginning.
If you need a little more help to do it, David Clayton and I did write a book for just this purpose: to help you. It’s called The Little Oratory: A Beginner’s Guide to Praying in the Home. There are even icons by David in the back, beautifully printed, that you can carefully tear out along the perforations and frame for your prayer place.
Truly, I urge you to do it! Make this a priority. Even with all the things I’m always saying about making menus, cleaning up, doing laundry, teaching your children, and on and on, this — the little oratory — is the most important one, the first step to a simple prayer life.
(If you search the hashtag littleoratory or thelittleoratory on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook, you will see many inspiring prayer places that people have made, big and little! And many of the ideas in the book are already here on the blog — just search “little oratory” in the archives.)
bits & piecesDesperately Needing Thomas More — A book review of a biography of a great saint
Our friend Jim sent this one around to our homeschooling group, and it’s delightful! Danny MacAskill’s Wee Day Out – “Want to see what Danny MacAskill does on his day off? Wee Day Out explores the rural landscape around Edinburgh in a film that sets out to capture the simple fun of a ride in the country… “
Danny knows how to fall off his bike as well as ride it! Six minutes of fun music and incredible bike antics in the beautiful Scottish countryside! (Don’t miss the outtakes at the end!) Let’s go!
AI (Artificial Intelligence) is upon us, and it’s important to understand the principles and causes of intelligence in order to assess it correctly. It’s also important to understand computers. ChatGPT Only Says What It Was Told To SayLongtime readers will know that I just love John Saward (whom my mom, Habou, introduced me to). Here is an older talk he gave on the importance of beauty to worship and it makes a wonderful meditation on the transcendent and how we as human beings can draw close to it, to God: Fr. John Saward: The Poverty of the Church and the Beauty of the Liturgy
On that note, an article by David Clayton on whether poverty and beauty are compatible — on whether beauty costs too much, or really serves the poor
Have you read the classic Italian novel The Betrothed? I haven’t been able to get through it, but now there is a new translation. This review makes it sound very appealing indeed, making a case for the richness of the world Manzoni creates and the impact of the language he constructs to serve it. Have you read this new translation?
It’s important to mourn our dead immediately. In our over-scheduled world, we want births and deaths to be controlled in our timelines, but that’s not good for anyone.
Last week I linked to a video that includes an interview with Shetland knitters. I forgot to mention that if you hang in there on that episode (beyond the one hour mark — that channel is like a magazine for knitters, which is pretty cool, but takes some time), it is revealed that one of the sisters is that incredible woman who knit herself a garden fence! That same lady whom I had linked to a few years ago! The interview reveals that the pattern she chose is a lace from the traditional shawls she makes. It’s just a fabulous concept — talk about making do, and creativity!
PSA: As you know, most things in my house are thrifted, given to me, found on the side of the road, or gotten on clearance. As you also know, I’m not great at window treatments. So this is exciting…
Do you love my new living-room curtains (see above as well)?
They are 100% linen, lined with cotton (lined!) and an incredible price. And they are made in India, not China! The quality is outstanding. They do only come in very long lengths; if you don’t have high ceilings, they would not be hard to shorten, and you’d still come out ahead. (You can do an internet search to shorten without sewing. Put your rod up as high as you can, let them hang for a while so that gravity does its thing, and then shorten away.)
You can find them at Homegoods, here — there were some at the store but not four pairs, which is what I need. I was able to get free shipping, and you can return at the store.
The colors and lengths keep changing a bit, so do a search on that site for “Pure Luxury Linen 2pk Extra Wide Room Darkening Curtains” and see what turns up. The unlined ones are nice too, if you just want something sheer. Note that what I got, in that link, is two lined, wide panels — you simply won’t find a better price, and I know because it’s taken me 23 years to get these! I got 4 pairs for my bedroom too! (Note to self, why buy a house where every room has four giant windows, when you are window-treatment-impaired, why!)
This is not a promoted link at all — I just love them and want to share my find!
from the archivesThis Lent, begin again, but in your own wayPractical thoughts for Lent, and Eat More Soup!liturgical living
help us recover from our cyber attack — remind your friends about us and —follow us everywhere!
My book, The Summa Domestica: Order and Wonder in Family Life is available now from Sophia Press! All the thoughts from this blog collected into three volumes, beautifully presented with illustrations from Deirdre, an index in each volume, and ribbons!
My “random thoughts no pictures” blog, Happy Despite Them — receive it by email if you like, or bookmark, so you don’t miss a thing!
My new podcast can be found on the Restoration of Christian Culture website (and you can find it where you listen to such things) — be sure to check out the other offerings there!
Stay abreast of the posts here at LMLD, when they happen:
Consider subscribing to this blog by email. In the current situation, if we can’t meet here, it would be good for us to be connected by email!
We share pretty pictures: Auntie Leila’s Instagram, Rosie’s Instagram, Deirdre’s Instagram. Bridget’s Instagram.
Auntie Leila’s Facebook (you can just follow)
The boards of the others: Rosie’s Pinterest. Sukie’s Pinterest. Deirdre’s Pinterest. Habou’s Pinterest (you can still get a lot of inspiration here! and say a prayer for her!). Bridget’s Pinterest.
The post This is the Lent to make a little oratory appeared first on Like Mother, Like Daughter.
