Ruth Soukup's Blog, page 80

Easy Thai Chicken

Our theory here at LWSL is that you can never have too many quick & easy freezer meals ready to go, especially ones that use budget-friendly chicken!  This tender, juicy, flavor-packed Thai Chicken is sure to be a new family favorite!

To make it as part of a freezer cooking day, just split the marinade & chicken into multiple bags, then throw it right into the freezer–no cooking required! Making it ahead of time is not necessary, though, as it is equally delicious just marinated in the fridge for about 30 minutes.

You can use any type of chicken but my family much prefers the boneless, skinless chicken thighs, which are a darker, juicier meat and also tend to be cheaper than the boneless skinless breasts.

Here is what you need:

2 bunches green onions
1/2 sweet onion
2 limes
1 can coconut milk
2 tablespoons fish sauce
2 tablespoons Sriracha 
1/4 cup olive oil
2 teaspoons freeze dried or fresh grated ginger
3-4 pounds boneless, skinless chicken
white rice (optional; for cooking day only!)
fresh cilantro (optional; for cooking day only!)
 
 

Step 1: Chop green onions and onions; squeeze juice of the two limes into a large bowl.

Step 2: In large bowl, whisk together lime juice, coconut milk, fish sauce, Sriracha, olive oil, ginger, green onion, and onion.

Step 3: Divide chicken into two gallon size freezer bags (be sure to label bags first!) Divide marinade into bags over top of chicken.  Freeze until needed.

Step 3: Thaw; Grill 5-7 minutes on one side, then turn over and grill 5-8 minutes longer.  Alternate directions: Arrange chicken in casserole dish and bake at 400 degrees for 30-40 minutes. Serve over cooked rice.

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Recipe: Easy Thai Chicken

Summary: This mouth-watering recipe comes together so easy and can be grilled or cooked in the oven.

Ingredients

2 bunches green onions
1/2 sweet onion
2 limes
1 can coconut milk
2 tablespoons fish sauce
2 tablespoons Sriracha
1/4 cup olive oil
2 teaspoons freeze dried or fresh grated ginger
3-4 pounds boneless, skinless chicken
white rice (optional; for cooking day only!)
fresh cilantro (optional; for cooking day only!)

Instructions

Chop green onions and onions; squeeze juice of the two limes into a large bowl.
In large bowl, whisk together lime juice, coconut milk, fish sauce, Sriracha, olive oil, ginger, green onion, and onion.
Divide chicken into two gallon size freezer bags (be sure to label bags first!)
Thaw; Grill 5-7 minutes on one side, then turn over and grill 5-8 minutes longer.  Arrange chicken in casserole dish and bake at 400 degrees for 30-40 minutes. Serve over cooked rice.

Preparation time: 5-7 minutes

Cooking time: 10-16 minutes on grill or in oven 30-40 minutes at 400 degrees

Number of servings (yield): 8

5 Ways to Comfort Someone Who is Grieving

Today I am honored to introduce you to Susan Mead, an amazing woman I have had the pleasure of connecting with a couple of times this past year.  She has an incredible–and heartbreaking–story, one she shared in her recent book, Dance with Jesus: From Grief to Grace.  Today she is here at LWSL to share about a topic we don’t always want to talk about–dealing with grief.  If you’ve ever struggled to know what to say to someone who is dealing with loss, this is one post you will not want to miss!

This is a guest post from Susan B. Mead

Hello all!  I am Susan B. Mead, an author, speaker, chaplain and mom. I authored the book, Dance with Jesus: From Grief to Grace. Prior to that, I spent 22+ years in corporate America with Johnson & Johnson until I decided to retire 10-years early because I realized things get broken, discarded and replaced in life, but people matter…and I wanted to spend time with those who matter most. Why?

In 2004, I lost Bette, my younger sister and a brilliant PhD nurse, to suicide.
In 2008, I lost Kyle, my 20 year old college-aged son to drugs and alcohol on the last night of spring break.
In 2013, I was in the grandstands cheering on Amby Burfoot, my cousin, as he ran the 45th anniversary of winning the Boston Marathon, only to see the first bomb explode directly across the street.

Having experienced my share of grief, I learned God shines the brightest light in the darkest moments and shows up when we need him most. I simply want to share my journey to inspire, empower and equip others…You too can find grace in the midst of grief.

Remember That Your Words Matter

The first thing I learned when training as a Chaplain was that the most gracious words you can share when a friend is dealing with loss are “I can’t imagine…”

I can’t imagine dignifies their loss, their pain and their feelings. It also shows how much you care about your words and their dignity. Give your precious friend the grace you would want should you find yourself in their situation.

How do you give grace? Following the words I can’t imagine, here is the key point. Please do not be tempted to define their grief with your words. Insert no words such as pain, anger, devastation, hopelessness, helplessness, etc. Any word inserted is how you would feel and may or may not address their feelings.  So let a heartfelt “I can’t imagine” be sufficient, heartfelt and compassionate.

I care. You matter to me. I’m here to listen. You are in my prayers.

Yes, your words matter, so please choose them wisely. Your intention is to comfort your friend rather than wound them with your words, so pause a moment and consider carefully how you would feel hearing the words you are about to say.

Please be mindful and skip platitudes or words that minimize your friend’s loss and their feelings. Examples follow—God needed a new angel. They are better off. Have you heard about this person’s loss? Or I know exactly how you feel (please do not follow these words with a tirade about you or someone else).

Your words can offer your friend such comfort and peace. They will thank you for fewer words with deeper meaning!

Should your friend be dealing with a loss of a family member or friend due to suicide or drug/alcohol interaction or overdose, remember to not minimize the person or the loss of that person. God’s greater plan may take a long time to unfold, so please withhold any words that may be misinterpreted as judgmental on your part. We learn that we don’t always know God’s plan even when it seems so evident.

Here’s just a couple of examples I heard following my sister’s suicide:

I’m so sorry she committed the unpardonable sin. I’m so sorry she’s gone to hell.

Or this comment I heard at a friend’s son’s funeral:

Well, he was just a “druggy” anyway, so no big loss.

Can you imagine adding the burden of hearing those (or similar) words to your loss or your friend’s loss? None of us would intentionally speak so callously.

Remember that your actions matter

Consider what you would want your friends to do for you and do that! There will be a houseful of people who come to comfort their friend and family member, creating some different needs during the time immediately surrounding the loss.

The most obvious action is to visit your friend who is experiencing a loss.  Hug them. Take them food, whether a casserole, a pre-sliced ham, turkey breast or grab and go food, like a tray of sandwiches, veggies, fruit.

One precious friend brought a huge bundle of necessities. Yes, paper goods, i.e., toilet paper, paper towels, napkins, paper plates, plastic utensils, disposable cups, and cases of water! Can I share that this was the best delivery I received, as I was not stocked for masses of caring visitors? I welcomed each person and I most certainly welcomed “the necessities” when they were delivered. This gift allowed me to spend time with the friends who were caring for me versus having to become the caregiver in my time of need.

Reach out to your friend with a phone call to let them know you care. Do not expect a return call if your message goes to voice mail. Be brief. Why do I say this? There are so many folks who show up to help during a loss, that your friend may have visitors and does not want to be rude to you or to them. So consider what may be going on around them without questioning them. I was not able to think clearly, so if asked, I am not sure the best answers were provided. Your friend may also experience a change in their ability to process questions during their time of loss.

Has God put an idea in your head or on your heart regarding your friend? Follow that nudge! Simply take your friend what’s on your heart – it will be exactly right.  Please remember to not ask what they need, as they just lost what they need most – that person.

You may prefer to send a memorial, a plant, a tree or other pass-along plant in memory of their loved one. Have you ever considered planning a tree and sending a photo along with a card to show the newly planted tree if you are in their hometown and they are now from away, especially if you know that they would appreciate that gesture?

After I lost Kyle, my best friend told me that every time I saw a butterfly, I would hear Kyle say, “Love you momma,” and dragonflies, he would say, “Hey, hey momma!” because Kyle was such a cut up. Now when I see a butterfly, I hear God whisper, “Love you” or when I see a dragonfly, that God whisper is a chuckled, “Hey darlin.’”  You may “give” a similar gift to your sweet friend that becomes a cherished recollection too.

Is there a special thing associated with their loved one? Find a card with that image on it, i.e., heart, butterflies, dragonflies, cardinals, their favorite sports emblem or team, whatever, to send to them with a note about what you recall about that thing being special to them. Your note will be among their treasures!

Please remember to include your first and last name, return address, phone and email on the card itself. Envelopes can and do get separated. Invariably, that occurs when they will need your contact information to send you a thank you note.

It may be thoughtful for you to send a gift card or to even have pizza or another type of meal delivered a couple of weeks or months after their loss by a restaurant in their area (FIRST confirm they will be home & include the tip for the delivery person when you pay.) Food tends to be gone a few weeks after the loss as do the friends who were so very present immediately following their loss.

Do you cherish your family photographs? Yes? So do people who have experienced loss. They will not be able to take any new photos!  Do send ANY photos you have of their loved one.

If the pictures are digital, put the photos on a jump drive and mail to them. Or email them a shared folder with photos of their loved one in subject line. I received so many emails, many were lost in the deluge. The jump drive allowed me get to it when I was able versus losing the most important gift a friend could give me – memories of my loved one. This was the most cherished gift I received as new photographs are no longer an option. Should you find pictures later as you go through photographs, SEND them then! What an amazing gift of remembrance it would be to be given that gift sometime later!

Grief seems to “whack” attention span for many people. If you feel compelled to send a book, consider sending a short, easy to read book, not a heavy tome (sounds like tomb) or a huge saga (sounds like a sob). Your desire is to provide your friend with words that have meaning and that matter right now. So right now, their reading preferences may have changed from what they normally read.  Some avid readers find themselves experiencing challenges sitting still or focusing on words on a page as they grieve the loss of a dear one.

Don’t be afraid to speak the name of their loved one

Like honey, their loved one’s name is sweet to their soul. Hearing their loved one’s name is also like a cup of hot tea. It comforts. It also honors and pays tribute to their lost dear one. Please know that it will not “make them sad” to hear the name of someone they love(d) as love never ends.  It lives on in memories. So speak up!

Help them remember their loved one

Don’t you love it when we have memories that make us feel great? Memories help us recall the love of the moment and of the person.  Put reminders on your calendar with advance notice to reach out in remembrance at key times.  You may want to consider some significant dates, such as:

1st anniversary of their loss – send a card, a photo, a video, or something that honors their loss. They will cherish you.

Loved one’s birthday – such thoughtfulness is uncommon. Be that uncommon friend who cares deeply and is thoughtful beyond measure.

When you think of them – simply let your friend know you care, whether it’s a phone call, a text, a social media message, a handwritten card or even a visit.

Use your natural gifts

Caring shows in all you do and say.  It is so wonderful when we are able to use our natural gifts to bless someone, so think about something you like to do and simply do it for your friend.

Is praying one of your strengths?  Pray for your friend.  You may want to write them a note including your prayer so they see just how deeply you care about their emotional and spiritual wellbeing.

Do you like to cook?  Stepping into the kitchen may well be the first thing you want to do.  Do it!

Do you have pictures, video or even old film of their loved one?  You may want to make a scrapbook, or load a digital photo frame with those sweet reminders of their precious loved one.  Should you have old photos or film, consider taking them to a service to have them digitized.  Can you imagine what a treasure that would be?!

Are you a storyteller?  Tell a story about their sweet, sweet loved one.  Whether you video it (with your cell phone-so simple!), record yourself telling the story (again, cell phones are pretty amazing technology) or simply writing your story about some cherished or fun or funny moment about their loved one will light up the moment they see, hear or read the story.  Share your story!

Do you like to use your hands to make things neat?  Offer to clean their house, mow the lawn, etc.  Can you imagine how appreciated that may be?

Are you naturally gifted at organizing things? Offer to help coordinate a meal for the family and friends before or after the service so people have a place to gather.

Or you may simply offer to drive folks to and from the funeral home and cemetery.  Why do I say that?  I got left at the funeral home following the viewing…Laughable now, yet people were headed to my house to gather for fellowship and food!  People who are mourning are so easily distracted that the normal process of going through the mental “checklist” to make sure everyone and everything is in it’s place may be compromised.

Remember, things get broken, discarded or replaced, yet people matter. Let your friend know that they matter…to you. Give your friend the best gift of all ~ the gift of your time.

Susan B. Mead is an author, speaker, chaplain and mom. Susan authored the book, Dance with Jesus: From Grief to Grace, which hit #1 Amazon Hot New Release in Christian Grief on the day it released. Susan spent over 22 years in corporate America with Johnson & Johnson until she decided to retire 10-years early because she realized things get broken, discarded and replaced in life, but people matter… and she wanted to spend time with those who matter most to her.

Weekend Wandering

Happy Weekend!  It has been a crazy week around here with all our home improvement projects, and I am excited for some serious chill-out time! My girls only have a few days left of school and I think all of us are counting the days until summer vacation begins!  What are your plans for the weekend?

Here is what I loved this week:

  *   *   *

First of all, this Southwestern Sweet Potato Hash from A Mind “Full” Mom sounds SO amazing!  I had something similar at a restaurant once and it was one of the best breakfasts I have ever had!  Yum!

This Cowboy Caviar from Frugal Living NW is gluten & dairy free!  That makes it healthy right?

This Oriental Chicken Salad from Simple Green Moms sounds like the perfect quick, easy, & refreshing summer meal!

Mmm…this Spinach & Bacon Salad in a Jar from The Seasoned Mom is the perfect meal to take on the go!

Pecan pie is my all time favorite!  These yummy Chocolate Pecan Pie Bars from Spend With Pennies are the perfect way to get all the flavor with a lot less effort! YUM!

These Lime Cheesecake Bites from Home. Made. Interest look really yummy too!

There were a TON of great household, parenting, and money saving tips linked up this past week!  With summer just a few days away for my kids, I loved these 7 tips for preventing summer learning loss from  Pulling Curls!

Planning a trip this summer?  Check out these great tips for How to Pack a Child’s Suitcase from Organizing Moms!

Fights about money can break even the strongest marriage.  If finances are a source of contention in your home, you might want to check out these 4 Tips to Stop Fighting About Money from Cents and Order. #4 is so important!

Finally, I loved these 4 Tips for Dealing with Budget Burnout from Frugal Debt Free Life. #3 is so true!

*   *   *

What did you love this week?

7 Ways to Save Money on Fast Food

This is a guest post from Kalyn Brooke of Creative Savings

As much as we may try, all the meal planning in the world can’t compete with the unexpected.

You might have an incredibly busy day at work, or a tiring afternoon chasing kiddos around the house. Or maybe you’re out running errands and have a sporting event or church activity right around 6pm. It’s exhausting to even think about dinner at that point, let alone prepare it!

Common sense tells us that fast food isn’t ideal for a tight budget (or your waistline), but let’s be honest — it can also be a life saver in the middle of the most energy-draining moments. It sure beats an expensive sit-down meal at a fancy restaurant, plus you don’t have to hassle with bulky coolers, hungry kids, or making sure nobody spills their juice in the car when you try and pack your own.

That still doesn’t mean you throw caution to the wind whenever you pull into your favorite drive-thru lane. It pays to be smart, and these 7 tips are essential to making the most of your meal. They’ll also save you a few bucks along the way!

1. Order Water

Water might be boring, but it’s also free–not to mention SO much better for you than soda! That makes it the perfect beverage option whether you’re struggling to make ends meet or not. Eating fast food can be unhealthy enough as it is–there’s no need to make it even worse by adding hundreds of completely empty calories to the meal.  Besides, when you realize how much of a markup soda is at these restaurants, it makes you even more disgusted at the thought of paying for it.  If you just can’t do plain water, ask for a lemon to give you extra flavor, or split a big drink with your spouse and family.

(As an FYI, splitting drinks and then getting free refills is frowned upon in any establishment, and can get you into some pretty big trouble. Refills should be per person only.)

2. Know Where Kids Eat Free

It’s really surprising how many restaurants offer free or almost free meals for kids. Whether it’s a certain day of the week or a certain time of day, you’re bound to find at least one fast food joint that will cut you a deal.

For the most extensive list, be sure to check out Money Saving Mom’s roundup. And remember that each offer varies by state and region, so always call ahead to your local chain to find out.  You definitely don’t want to arrive with a van full of hungry kiddos only to find out that one franchise is the exception!

3. Check Receipts for Surveys

How often do you throw away your receipts along with the tray and leftover food wrappers? I used to do this all the time! Now I always make sure to take a peek at the bottom of the receipt before tossing. Sometimes there is a survey offer that will give you a free soda, burger, or a Buy One Get One deal just for taking 5 minutes to answer a few questions.

The only catch is each coupon code you are given does come with an expiration date, so it may or may not be worth it depending on how often you eat at that particular chain.

4. Split Your Fries

I don’t know about you, but I can never finish an entire box of fries {nor should I with all those fat-inducing calories found in there!} However, if you’re eating with your family, spouse, or significant other, one of you should order the large value meal and then equally split the fries. The large box of fries is usually more than enough, and it’s also much cheaper than everyone getting their own {smaller} meal.

You also might want to consider ordering just a sandwich and fries separately with a water, rather than the whole value meal, but the price comparison and potential discount will differ from restaurant to restaurant.

5. Don’t Waste Extras

If you have ketchup or sauce packets leftover from your meal, don’t throw them away. These are the perfect size to throw in work lunches, or to extend the life of your condiments at home. I do the same thing with napkins and keep a hefty stash in the glove compartment of my car for emergency spills. And if we have a large enough collection in the car, I’ll add them to our pile of paper napkins at home.

However, this doesn’t mean you “take extra” just for the purpose of bringing them home. That’s considered stealing, and again, you could get in big trouble with the restaurant!

6. Get Creative With Sandwich Orders

Just because a specialty sandwich is on the menu, doesn’t mean you have to order it that way. Here are just a few ideas to create your own “sandwich hacks” that save money over big value meals:

At Subway, split a footlong sub meal rather than buying two 6-inch ones.
At McDonalds, order a McDouble without ketchup and mustard, and ask if they can put on some cheese and Mac sauce. This is a poor-man’s Big Mac, but still tastes the same.
At Arby’s, order two Junior roast beef sandwiches rather than a regular classic. You’ll get the same amount of meat for less!

Some restaurants may charge you extra for items like cheese and bacon, but other condiments are generally interchangeable. The idea is to look for dollar menu items that can be substituted for a larger $4-$5 specialty sandwich.

7. Use Coupons

Restaurant coupons are plentiful enough — you just have to know where to look. Check your Sunday paper, comb through ads that look like junk in your mailbox, and sign up for your favorite fast food email lists for coupons each month and free stuff around your birthday. You can even sign up for a City Savings or Entertainment book for more savings.

We personally try to limit our restaurant selections to those we have a coupon for, which decreases the temptation to eat out all the time. The food might not be exactly what we are craving, but it does save us money!

As you try some of these tips at your favorite fast food restaurants, remember that being frugal isn’t always about being miserly or “cheap”. It’s definitely not ethical to cheat companies out of their money by playing the system.

However, as I’ve described above, you can save money in the right and ethical way, and still get a great deal from your local chain. Just make sure you don’t end up visiting them too often. You want to build up that savings account too!

Kalyn Brooke is a full-time writer and blogger at CreativeSavingsBlog.com, where she gives a fresh perspective on frugal living, and the kick-in-the-pants you need to create a budget from scratch. She lives in beautiful Southwest Florida with her news-photographer husband. She loves making to-do-lists, reading good books, eating chocolate peanut butter ice cream, and pursuing big big dreams…all carefully planned out, of course.

 

Thrifty Thursday {Week 109}

Happy Thursday! If you have been following me on Instagram, you’ve probably seen that it has been a crazy here!  My husband and I are working with Closet Maid on a couple of big home improvement projects–cleaning out our garage that has been complete chaos for more than ten years & also re-doing my master closet.  I’m excited for the changes, but also completely exhausted!  I’m also very grateful to my husband for being such a trooper this week!

In other news, my kids only have one week left of school (say what?!!), and as we start gearing up for summer I can’t wait to see what fun crafts, recipes and money saving tips you have to share this week!

Here are the most clicked links from last week:

1. Involuntary Adulthood { Makeup Brushes 101 }
2. Graceful Little Honey Bee { 35 Frugal Recipes to Make When You’re Broke }

3. A Cultivated Nest { 10 Tips For The Newly Frugal }

4. My Stay at Home Adventures {My Stay at Home Bad Habits}

5. The Intentional Mom {10 Common Time Wasters}

6. Stacy Makes Cents {10 Frugal Convenient Foods to But at Costco}
7. Frugal Blonde {6 Ways I Saved in April}
8. Logger’s Wife {How I Track My Budget}
9. All in All {Why I Don’t Want to Lose Weight}
10. A Debt Free Stress Free Life {Supermarket Tricks that Get You to Buy More}
 
Never linked up before? Here’s how:

Scroll down, find the little blue “Add your Link” Button and click on that.
Follow the instructions on the next page – add a great image of your project and an interesting title. Make sure you link to the direct page of your budget friendly post – not the main page of your blog!
Try to visit at least a few other blogs at the party. Be sure to leave a comment to let them know you stopped by!
Please link back to this post somehow. There are badges available here; a simple text link is just fine too.

Feel free to tweet about Thrifty Thursday so others can join the fun, and don’t forget to check back here Sunday morning to see which posts have been featured this week at Weekend Wandering!

If this is your first time here I also invite you to check out my blogging guide, How to Blog for Profit (Without Selling Your Soul).  It is a fantastic resource if you are interested in building your blog, getting more traffic, or learning how to monetize!

An InLinkz Link-up

Caramel Cream Cheese Apple Dip

A few months ago my family attended a potluck gathering, and, while we were there, my husband stumbled upon a delicious apple dip made with caramel and cream cheese.  Now, my husband is not normally one for desserts, but this was different.  He couldn’t stop eating it.  Or talking about it.  He begged me to find out how to make it

Luckily for me, the “recipe” (if it can even be called that) couldn’t be any simpler. Just 3 easy ingredients and less than five minutes and you’re done.  And, as evidenced by our own experience, it is the perfect dish to bring to a party (though it is just as yummy served as an after-school snack!)

Here is what you need:

2 8oz packages cream cheese, softened
1 14 oz jar caramel sauce
2-3 Heath candy bars, crushed (or use Heath toffee chips)
Serve With: Granny Smith apples, sliced
 
 
 

Step 1: Combine cream cheese and  1/2 of the caramel sauce in mixing bowl; beat until well-blended.

Step 2: Spoon cream cheese mixture into pretty serving dish.

Step 3: Cover cream cheese with remaining caramel.

Step 4: Sprinkle caramel with toffee chips.

Step 5: Serve immediately with sliced granny smith apples.

    Print This!    




Recipe: Caramel Cream Cheese Apple Dip

Summary: This sweet, creamy, crunchy dip is the perfect little treat to go with crisp apple slices, or any of your other favorite fruits!

Ingredients

2 8oz packages cream cheese, softened
1 14 oz jar caramel sauce
2-3 Heath candy bars, crushed (or use Heath toffee chips)
Serve With: Granny Smith apples, sliced



Instructions

Combine cream cheese and 1/2 of the caramel sauce in mixing bowl; beat until well-blended.
Spoon cream cheese mixture into pretty serving dish.
Cover cream cheese with remaining caramel.
Sprinkle caramel with toffee chips.
Serve immediately with sliced granny smith apples.

Preparation time: 5-7 minutes

Number of servings (yield): 12

10 Things Kids Need to Be Happy (& 2 They Don’t)

We all want to be happy, and as parents, we all want our kids to be happy, too.  We want to give them all the things we may have missed in our own childhoods, and fill them up with knowledge, love, and joy. We sign them up for lessons to boost creativity and learning, we push them to excel at sports, will fill their lives with the latest toys and electronics, we pack weekends with activities, and we sometimes work overtime to create magical memories—hoping to help our children have fun as they learn and grow.

But I think sometimes, in our eagerness to give our kids everything, we may go overboard.

Here’s the thing–children are pretty darn joyful by nature. Without the cares of the world to weigh them down, they’re often able to experience a vast range of emotion over the most mundane experiences.  No child is happy all the time, of course, and some kids are cross more frequently than others (just like some adults), but all children are constantly in a state of wonder and discovery.

Maybe we need to just stop trying so hard.

So what’s the secret to happy children? In the end think it is giving kids what they need most, while allowing them the freedom to grow, learn, and explore the world on their own.  Here are the 10 things kids need to be happy (as well as the two they don’t!)

Basic Safety

Most us try to do our best to ensure our children are kept as safe as possible at all times. It’s impossible for a child to learn, thrive or experience happiness if they’re worried about their home environment or if they feel unsafe.

That said, kids are amazingly resilient. While a parent’s job is to keep them healthy and safe, to take them to the doctor and dentist regularly, and to tend to any injuries or illnesses, it’s not necessary to try to shelter them from every possible worst-case scenario, or to go overboard on avoiding germs.

Food and Sleep

As a parent, I’ve learned that most of my kids’ behavioral problems are often directly related to either a lack of sleep or too much sugar (or, God forbid, both!)

While most (including me!) of us are far from perfect, providing a healthy, well-balanced diet–at least most of the time–is one of the most important things we can do for our kids!  Children, left to their own devices, won’t always choose the right foods, which means that as parents, it is our job to not give in to the demands. (If you have picky eaters, check out this post on How I Got My Kids to Eat Their Vegetables.)

Furthermore, most kids need 10-12 hours of sleep every night, especially during growth spurts, and if they are not getting that much, it is time for them to start going to bed earlier or getting up later.

Genuine Success

Kids are eager to please. They thrive not just on positive reinforcement, praise and acknowledgement, but on actually accomplishing something of value.. Positive reinforcement is incredibly important, but it is just as important to give your child opportunities to excel, to work, and to contribute to the family.  Make your expectations clear, then find creative ways to acknowledge genuine success.

I’ve noticed people often praise their little girls by complimenting them on their looks. You’re so pretty! –or– You have a beautiful smile! While that is all fine and good, I think it’s also important we praise our kids for the things that they DO, like tackling a problem or being creative. If my girls are being girly, I’ll compliment them on how they styled their outfit or hair, rather than only complimenting the outfit itself.

Achievements don’t need to be incentivized by food or toys. Teaching your children to be proud of a job well-done is a much more powerful reinforcement tool.  Better yet, it helps kids gain confidence without adding additional “stuff” to your household.

Physical Touch

I’m no helicopter parent. Jumping at every request and keeping kids in a bubble? No thank you. It’s exhausting and unnecessary, not to mention counter-productive when it comes to reinforcing happiness and good behavior.

Even so, kids of all ages (babies, children and even teens) NEED touch and affection. Human contact is one of our most basic needs and requirements. Mothers of premature babies are often encouraged to help babies thrive with skin-on-skin contact and studies show that children who are touched, held, cuddled and loved are happier and more likely to thrive.

Never underestimate the power of a hug or a few minutes of cuddle time. I even find that a hand on their arm or shoulder while I am talking helps my girls pay attention to the message and focus more on what I’m trying to say.

Social Interaction

In the social media age, there’s a lot of talk about being connected, but for a kid (and adults), real LIVE connections are vital to social and emotional development. Social interaction helps kids learn about boundaries, feelings and how to have relationships as they grow into adulthood.

It’s not just interacting with other kids that’s important either–kids need to be taught how to speak and interact with adults in a polite and friendly way.  Before we go anywhere, my husband and I always give our girls a two minute pep talk, reminding them that our expectation of them is to look people in the eye, to speak loudly and clearly, and to use “sir” and “ma’am.”  We firmly believe that helping them think about social niceties and relationship-building at an early age provides lifelong skills that will foster healthy connections into adulthood.

While it’s okay to be observant, it’s not a good idea to become too overbearing. Encourage your kid (especially if they’re a bit older) to work out their own battles. Even disagreements between kids build social problem-solving skills and an understanding of group dynamics. It can be painful to see your child sad or feel rejected, but it’s a great opportunity to talk through the issue and provide advice and coping skills.

Independence

Allowing our kids to do things for themselves, and to make mistakes is hard sometimes, but so incredibly important! It allows them to learn that actions have consequences, and also gives them the opportunity to correct their own mistakes, and to triumph over failure.

Remember the first time you went to the mall alone or the first time you successfully made cookies without any help? These big steps in growth and development are so important. You might even be a little surprised at how well your kids rise to the occasion of responsibility.

Gratitude

Gratitude breeds happiness. Yet, appreciation and gratitude can be a tricky concept for children to grasp. We need to model gratitude in our own lives for our kids. One activity I’ve found to be very effective is to encourage my girls to list what they’re thankful for, right at that moment.

This reflection can turn around a bad mood and can really be enlightening and uplifting. Help your kids write thank you cards and reinforce the habit of saying please and thank you when making a request. Acknowledging all the good things in life can help children think outside of themselves and view the bigger picture.

Limits

Now, most kids would say they HATE bedtime or cleaning their room or being told ‘NO’…but guess what? All kids need and crave limits.  Not only do these things build important life skills, but they allow kids to feel cared for and loved.  My husband often tells my girls, “my job is not to be your friend, it is to make you a good grownup.”

Keeping a consistent schedule with clear expectations works wonders for our family. Our girls know what to expect and so do we! Setting appropriate limits not only gives you peace of mind as a parent, but also helps your child feel safe and secure. Kids with limits can feel free to explore the world more fully within those boundaries, because they don’t have to worry about what’s on the outside.

Routine is not only comforting, but consistency gives kids something to rely on and fall back on. When there’s time set up to complete a homework assignment or our kids know that tomorrow they’ll return to the same friends at school, they feel more secure and less anxious.

Creativity

Just like adults, children love creative pursuits. Crafts and art projects help build on concepts and ideas from school. They provide kids with an escape and a chance to pretend and try on different identities and simply “play.”

I find that exploring new experiences with my girls is one of the best parts of being a mom. I just love to see my kids learn, create and experience new things. When we give our kids the tools they need to get creative and allow them to explore their imaginations to the fullest, their full potential comes alive. This might mean less time in front of the television and more time with books and paper, glue, scissors and clay.

I think it’s important to allow kids the freedom to try new pursuits and find the things they love (and let go of the things they don’t). If you have to force your child to go to piano lessons or art class, then maybe it’s just not for them. Provide a variety of options and they’ll eventually find an activity that fits their aptitude and makes their heart sing!

Happy Parents

Happy parents generally have happy kids. We often, especially as moms, overlook our own interests and pursuits in favor of meeting our children’s needs, but you know what? A mom that’s confident, relaxed and happy serves as a great example for her children. (And trust me, I know it’s NOT always easy!)

Give yourself time to pursue the things you love and find fulfilling. Simplify your life, practice gratitude, and make your activities meaningful and joyful. Your children will benefit from your presence. Even if your time is stretched a little thin or if you have to juggle parenting with your spouse, finding time to keep your needs met will not only strengthen your marriage, but is a key factor in the happiness of your family overall.

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Of course you may have already noticed that there are a few things that didn’t make this list. Here are two things your kids DON’T need to be happy:

More Stuff

It’s no secret that I firmly believe in keeping things clutter-free! It’s why I don’t advocate buying more toys, and in fact, it’s the now somewhat infamous reason I took my kids toys away. We discovered firsthand that not only did more stuff make our kids less happy, it was becoming a source of anxiety and conflict for our kids.

Since getting rid paring down the amount of stuff in their lives, we’ ve seen a huge transition in not only the way my children think but the way they experience happiness. I see a renewed zest for creativity. There’s less selfish behavior, fewer tantrums and fewer frustrations.

More Activities

We all know those families–the ones who spend every spare moment in the car, running from one activity, sporting event, and obligation to the next.  While a few activities can be beneficial, and even healthy, more is not always better.  Make sure you are giving your kids enough free time to just be kids!

Weekend Wandering

Happy Weekend and Happy Mother’s Day! My husband and I are gearing up for a couple of big home improvement/organization projects this week that I am SUPER excited about!  The awesome folks from ClosetMaid will be helping us finally get our disastrous garage in order, as well as redesigning my bedroom closet.  They will be filming the whole process, which will be interesting, but I can’t wait to see how it all turns out!  (Be sure to follow me on Instagram if you want to see updates throughout the week!)

But now on to the good stuff…..here is what I loved this week:

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First of all, these Parmesan Roasted Potatoes from Kleinworth & Co. would be the perfect accompaniment to my favorite Scrambled Eggs!  Yum!

This sweet and savory Maple-Glazed Pecan, Apple and Parmesan Pizza from Study at Home Mama sounds so good!   The perfect addition to your Mother’s Day brunch menu!

This Smoked Caesar Salad with Chicken from This Silly Girl’s Life sounds like another great menu option!

This Tabouleh Recipe from Analida’s Ethnic Spoon is full of fresh ingredients and is delicious served cold or at room temperature.

These gourmet Lasagna Rolls from A Mother’s Shadow are sure to impress!

Onto the sweets…this super simple Lemonade Freezer Pie from Enchanted Homeschooling Mom sounds so light and refreshing!

This Banana Pudding Cake from With a Blast can be made in no time with items you probably have on hand.

This Dark Chocolate Apple Mug Crisp Cake from Crystal & Co. sounds delicious too!

Mmmmm…these brownies + chocolate chip cookies aka: Brookies from Creations by Kara are the perfect treat to tame your chocolate craving!

This Coconut Mojito from Flour on My Face could turn any afternoon into a tropical celebration! YUM!

These Nail Polish Marbled Flower Pots from Family Balance Sheet would be a fun craft project to do with the kids this weekend!

These Mother’s Day Gift Tags from Designs by Miss Mandee are absolutely adorable!

This Grandma’s Picture Board from The Happy Scraps Blog is a super cute gift idea that you could throw together fast!

This Homemade Pedicure Kit from View From the Fridge would be a great gift to pamper mom!  I love any excuse to use my Essential Oils!

This DIY Mother’s Day Picture Frame idea from Charming Imperfections is the perfect way to capture those special memories!

 Frugal on the Prairie shares 8 Free Mother’s Day Gift Ideas in case money is tight.

 Mumbling Mel shares 5 tips on How to Live Frugally. I’m all about tip number 5!

These 3 Super Simple Things You Can Do Right Now to Save Money from What Mommy Does are so practical.

 Finally, Beautiful Budgets shares over 400 ideas on how a  A Couple That Saves Together-Stays Together!

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What did you love this week?

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What Every Mom Needs to Know About Insurance

As parents, it’s our responsibility to make sure our kids are cared for. We go out of our way to keep our kids safe, from buying bicycle helmets to Band-Aids to winter coats, right down to holding their hand when they cross the street.

Most of us worry endlessly about our kids’ well-being. I know I do! But as much as we worry about the little things, it’s sometimes easy to let the big things—those risks and dangers that are a little more intangible—slip by ignored or unattended to.

A big part of protecting our kids, as well as securing financial peace, is making sure our families are covered for the big things—natural disasters, an injury or illness, job loss, or worse.  Even so, it can sometimes be hard to determine exactly what coverage you need, especially when it seems like most insurance salesmen only want to play on your emotions.

When money is tight, you certainly don’t want to overspend on coverage that you don’t need, but you need be protected from major catastrophe. The best approach is to do your research ahead of time and be aware of the state of your family’s finances before you get a sales pitch.

If you follow Dave Ramsey’s plan for Financial Peace, you already know you should consider seeking the advice of his Endorsed Local Providers. These insurance, investing, real estate and tax professionals meet both Dave’s criteria and an independent set of standards to earn his endorsement. His ELPs have the heart of a teacher and want to make sure you get the help you need. It’s great to have a local provider that’s already vetted, so you can trust them before you even walk in the door.

And while I am personally a big Dave Ramsey fan and would much rather use one of his ELPs than go it alone, it is also important to remember that it’s not the insurance agency’s role to make sure you’re getting the best deal on insurance. It is up to you to be your own advocate and to get the best rate. Insurance isn’t something you can put on the back burner and just pay each month.

To get the best rates, you must continuously (at least once a year) revisit your insurance policies and do some comparison shopping. Plans and offers are constantly changing to meet the needs of the market. Rates can fluctuate as your family’s needs and situation change as well. Adding another driver, building on an addition to your home, changing your security system, or bringing a new member of your family into the world can all raise insurance questions and call for a little guidance.

According to Dave, there are seven types of insurance that you need: Homeowners/Renters, Auto, Health, Disability, Long-Term Care, Identity Theft, and Life.

 

Home

 If you’re paying a mortgage, the lender requires homeowner’s coverage, but even if you’re lucky enough to own your home outright, you want to be sure that you’re protected. Seeing as my home has been through one too many hurricanes, I can tell you that we’re aware of the amount of damage a home can sustain in such a scenario and just how much coverage is required to get us back on our feet. Don’t be caught without enough insurance to get you back to dry land.

For renters, insurance protects your possessions in case of fire, theft and, in some cases, flood. Renters insurance is often thought of as optional, but as a parent, you must cover yourself in case of tragedy. Renters insurance is often really quite inexpensive (less than $20/month!) and it’s very important if you have big-ticket items that might be difficult to replace, such as audio equipment, collectables, exercise gear, televisions and appliances. Take inventory of your household and make a list of those larger items that could be damaged or stolen, and would result in major financial hardship if you’d have to replace them.

There are several ways to save on homeowner and renter’s insurance. You can raise your deductible, combine policies and do some home improvements and emergency preparations to raise the protection level on your home. Improvements to home security can also help you save, as can new windows, doors, and extreme weather protection.

 

Auto

 When we think insurance, auto insurance is often the first thing that comes to mind. Driving is possibly the highest risk activity that any of us do almost every day, and we all know the importance of having liability coverage. In many states, it’s now illegal to operate a vehicle without liability insurance or proof of financial responsibility.

In our litigious society, unfortunately, coverage is mandatory to protect yourself from financial ruin in case of an accident or driving mistake. One moment can change your life and the life of another driver forever. Trust me, your mind will be at ease when you know you’re protected.

When it comes to auto insurance, the value of your vehicle is important when you’re determining the amount of coverage and type of insurance you need. If your car is in its twilight years, you may feel comfortable with less coverage or just liability. If you have a newer car (or if you’re paying off a car loan), you need to have full coverage to keep your investment safe.

There are several other ways to save on car insurance. Shop around, compare rates, and don’t become too loyal to just one agency or provider. There are good driver discounts, multiple car discounts, and even good grade programs for driving teens and students. Installing safety upgrades or attending defensive driving courses can also help lower your monthly payments and save you when it comes to paying for coverage.

 

Health

 Health insurance is so important. As parents, we know we must take children to the doctor for regular checkups. We also know that serious health issues can come out of nowhere—and without coverage they can leave households financially devastated.

Many employers offer health insurance, but if yours does not, or if you’re independently employed, private insurance providers are more affordable than you may think. Under the Affordable Care Act, you may qualify for low-cost coverage based on your income.

Consider a Health Savings Account and/or a high deductible plan to save the most. An HSA can save families thousands of tax-free dollars every year, which you can use toward your deductible, so your monthly premium will be lower. You can use your HSA for prescriptions, and depending on the plan, eye exams and preventative care.

Disability

 Disability insurance should cover 65% of your income and most employers offer disability coverage. It’s often something that’s overlooked, but one in seven workers will face a disability before retirement.

You should be sure your disability insurance is long-term. If you follow Dave Ramsey’s Seven Baby Steps toward financial peace, you should have 3–6 months of expenses saved up, which would cover your needs in the case of a short-term or minor disability. It’s the long-term scenarios that you should plan for. Most disabilities (90%!) are not covered by worker’s comp or social security.

The effects of a disability can financially ruin a family if you’re not properly prepared. Many workers facing disabilities can be out of work for three years or more. Consider what would happen to your family should they face an unforeseen accident or tragedy that leaves you unable to work.

 

Long-Term Care

As a parent, long-term care is not necessarily something that’s on any of our minds, but it’s a necessity for anyone over age 60. If your parents cannot afford long-term care insurance, this may be something you want to consider.

Consider the scenario of a parent who is facing a condition like dementia, Alzheimer’s or Parkinson’s disease, and requires long-term care. This situation can quickly eat up your parents’ retirement savings and even dip into your own savings and accounts. Those who qualify for Medicaid will receive some assistance, but it often leaves patients with limited options and plans for complete care.

As you near your 60s, long-term care should be on your horizon and part of your post-retirement financial plan. It’s a way to make sure you don’t financially burden your children or spouse and ensures you won’t leave them unable to make ends meet.

 

Identity Theft

If you’ve never faced the horror in dealing with having your identity stolen, then consider yourself very lucky. With data breaches on the rise among major retailers, it seems like everyone is at risk. Identity theft can cost you big-time in terms of time, money, effort, and just general headaches. In a worst-case scenario, identity theft can damage your credit and make recovery very difficult—even if you’re an innocent victim.

Part of your insurance portfolio should include identity theft protection. You should be sure it includes an identity restoration service that can fix the damage and get your identity restored and safe once again. Teaching your family good identity-safety habits such as limiting your exposure online and protecting your passwords can help protect you as well, but should the worst happen, insurance will be a lifesaver.

 

Life

Life insurance can be a little confusing. The general rule of thumb is you need term, not whole life. Cash value insurance can sound like a great way to invest and save money, but truth be told, it doesn’t offer high returns at all and generally is a poor performing product.

Term life insurance, on the other hand, is a way to cover yourself until you’re debt free and in a position to invest. It offers a way to help your spouse or children settle your estate and survive in relative comfort should something happen to you. Dave offers a calculator on his website to help you configure the amount of term insurance you need to cover your family in the worst-case scenario.

Term life insurance can help you cover burial costs and the costs of paying off your debt, plus further support of your family, particularly if you’re the sole breadwinner.

Facing uncertain scenarios in life is always unsettling, but having the proper insurance coverage can ease your mind and allow you to sleep a little easier at night. Look into the faces of your children and think of all the ways you would love to keep them safe. Insurance is one of the most simple, practical, and logical ways to protect your loved ones. 

This post was underwritten by Dave Ramsey’s Endorsed Local Provider program. If it’s time to evaluate your insurance policies (or maybe add one you don’t have yet!), talk with the insurance agent in your area Dave recommends to give you top-quality service. It’s free, and since these independent agents aren’t tied to one company’s insurance policies, they can search for a policy that gives you the best coverage for the best rate! Dave’s also giving away $30,000 this month! There are different cash prizes every weekday, so make sure you enter every day for your chance to win.

 

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Thrifty Thursday {Week 108}

Happy Thursday!  Is it just me or has the month of May brought on some serious summer fever?  My kids are counting down the days until summer vacation begins (11), and I have to admit–I think I am too!

Mother’s Day is this weekend, so I would once again love for you to link up your favorite Mother’s Day inspired recipes and gift ideas!

Here are the most clicked links from last week:

1. MBA SAHM { 5 Reasons You Should Not Pay Off Your Mortgage }
2. Graceful Little Honey Bee { How to Feed Your Family on a Tight Budget }

3. The Green Homemaker { How a Family of Four Lives Comfortably on $30,000/yr }

4. My Stay at Home Adventures {How to Reduce Your Spending}

5. A Cultivated Nest {Learn How to Be Frugal}

6. Six Figures Under {Would You Live in a Bus to Save Money?}
7. Snail Pace Transformations {The Top 10 Ways Homemakers Can Save Money}
8. A Debt Free Stress Free Life {Some Tough Love if You’re Broke}
9. How Do The Jones Do It? {How Do They Do That: Indebted and In Debt}
10. Thrifty Little Mom {Do You Have a Thrift Store Blind Spot?}
 
Never linked up before? Here’s how:

Scroll down, find the little blue “Add your Link” Button and click on that.
Follow the instructions on the next page – add a great image of your project and an interesting title. Make sure you link to the direct page of your budget friendly post – not the main page of your blog!
Try to visit at least a few other blogs at the party. Be sure to leave a comment to let them know you stopped by!
Please link back to this post somehow. There are badges available here; a simple text link is just fine too.

Feel free to tweet about Thrifty Thursday so others can join the fun, and don’t forget to check back here Sunday morning to see which posts have been featured this week at Weekend Wandering!

If this is your first time here I also invite you to check out my blogging guide, How to Blog for Profit (Without Selling Your Soul).  It is a fantastic resource if you are interested in building your blog, getting more traffic, or learning how to monetize!

An InLinkz Link-up

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