Akosua Dardaine Edwards's Blog, page 36
August 19, 2022
Tell Yourself - I will be okay
“To say that I am made in the image of God is to say that love is the reason for my existence, for God is love. Love is my true identity. Selflessness is my true self. Love is my true character. Love is my name.” Thomas Merton
You must tell yourself that no matter what happens, you will be okay. Remind yourself who you are.
The tendency to want to control fix it all (news flash - you cannot) is a fear based response. You ARE Love. Remember who you are.Tell yourself instead - I will be okay. Whatever happens, I will be okay.This is an Inside Job - focus on the inside and see how it impacts and reflect on the "outside"Face the situation. Do your best in the moment. Show up for yourself and Love yourself through it.You will be okay.September we go on a Self Awareness Journey- Four Week Immersive online Workshop. Join us, spread the word. Sign up Now - Welcome to Self Awareness - Tools for The Journey
August 17, 2022
Respect and trust the process of change
Respect and trust the process of change - Tasha Bee
Think about it, what is your natural and first response to change and uncertainty? Human beings love certainty, we want to be in control, in fact we live in the illusion that we have control over many things . We want to be and feel safe, knowing what is in front of us and what comes next makes us feel safe. Because of all of this, the usual response to change is resistance.
We resist change. We resist it until life says "no more resistance, let go and let's go" Life is neutral so when something happens, it really is a situation where we must change, let go or make a different choice.
What I have learnt is when we are in the midst of change and uncertainty, and there is resistance, no trust and no respect, we suffer. Of course, we must take into account all of our feelings and ride those waves, feel the feelings and be self aware. In the midst of it all, letting go and trusting the process is key.
What does that mean? What does that look like?
1. Pay attention to what is going on in your life - do not ignore the signs, the pain, the coincidences.
2. Tell yourself the truth - with kindness and compassion. Only when you tell yourself the truth you are able to move forward
3. Be willing to do a new thing - just a feeling of willingness will make a difference- affirm - I am willing to do a new thing
4. Stop making excuses, finding rationales, being defensive about the situation.
5. Love yourself through it- have patience, release the judgement.
6. Do something new and small daily - a simple thing like taking a new route to work or to home will show your brain something new.
7. Practice, Practice, Practice
Peace
September we go on a Self Awareness Journey- Four Week Immersive online Workshop. Join us, spread the word. Sign up Now - Welcome to Self Awareness - Tools for The Journey
August 15, 2022
Instead of Should
We receive messages constantly that we should be somewhere else, that we’d be happier if we had more, that healing is as simple as thinking positively, that it’s all our fault and therefore all up to us to shift how we view ourselves and the world… Lisa Olivera
One of the teachers that has helped me as I journey, Ms. Iyanla Vanzant, says this quite a lot "do not should on yourself" I always wondered what it meant. She explained that when we say or believe that we "should" we judge ourselves harshly. We also should on ourselves when did not do or was supposed to do something that we did not. This self judgement leads us to punish ourselves. I still wondered about it, I confess, there was some confusion around the word and its meaning.
I decided that I would become self aware of my use of should on myself to allow for a better understanding of it. I started recognizing that when I thought I missed something, could have done something better, or made mistakes I used should. I started paying attention to how I felt when I used the word "should". Minus judgement it was useful, with judgement I felt confused, and wrong.
Today, while reading a message from Lisa Olivera, she talked about the word should, and what could we use instead. The concept became so much clearer.
She talked about should's not being truth. Like "I should know this by now" or "I should not be in this same position again" She asked what can we say "instead of should?"
Instead of Should's
Instead of shoulds, we can ask ourselves: what might I need from this?
Instead of shoulds, we can approach ourselves with curiosity and openness.
Instead of shoulds, we can allow ourselves to not know it all.
Instead of shoulds, we can let ourselves learn new information.
Instead of shoulds, we can remember we’re only human: we’re nature.
Instead of shoulds, we can soften into all we don’t know.
Instead of shoulds, we can give ourselves permission to be in practice forever.
Instead of shoulds, we can trust we’re functioning with our own safety in mind, even when it feels dysfuntional or illogical.
Instead of shoulds, we can expand our ideas of what our healing path looks like.
Instead of shoulds, we can practice compassion and acceptance of what is.
Instead of shoulds, we can meet ourselves exactly where we are with grace.
Instead of shoulds, we can forgive ourselves for handling life imperfectly.
Instead of shoulds, we can lean deeper into self-kindness.
Instead of shoulds, we can let ourselves not know it all and not have it figured out.
I am practicing my instead of should muscle!
Peace
Akosua's Books
Nyabo (Madam) Why Are You Here?
What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love
August 13, 2022
This is a time of Choice
The deepest healing and delight arise from letting go. Yung Pueblo
It takes a Goliath of a spirit to claim the responsibility for one's irresponsible behaviours.
Most choose to defend self, explain self, with a desire to be more desirable based on Justification. Reasons. Excuse. You see, putting self aside leads to backups, backups lead to blockages, and blockages lead to most of the challenges that we face regarding our health (mental, spiritual and physical).There is a clinical difference between putting something aside and letting something go.So today I am letting go. This month, I am letting go. Making it a lifestyle habit.I am letting go because I don't want to carry anymore stowaway energy or emotion into my future.Letting go of those thoughts and feelings that haunt my development.This is a time of choice,This is a time of alignment and assignment.Start as you mean to go on.And remember that you chose, what to keep and what to put down.Remember, for this is a Journey and a time of acceptance.PeaceAkosua's Books
Nyabo (Madam) Why Are You Here?
What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love
August 11, 2022
Letting Go supports Receiving
To receive something, we have to be open and vulnerable. And more importantly, to receive, we must give up control. Stacy Hererera
What are you more comfortable with, giving or receiving? Confessions on the Journey - Receiving compliments, gifts, gestures used to be extremely challenging to me. I felt uncomfortable and sometimes cynical to receive. Sometimes I felt I had to earn, or show something tangible to receive from others. Who would and why would they just give me? whether it was a compliment, a kind word a gift without getting something back in return?
I have now learnt that giving and receiving are two sides of the same coin, there is no comfortable giving without comfortable receiving.
I have also learnt that receiving is not a bargain, no is it a reward, there is nothing to prove or show to yourself and others that makes you worthy. We are simply born worthy.
According to Stacey Herrera "the truth is that receiving is essential to our wellbeing. We cannot give without receiving. It's like breathing. We have to breathe in (receive) to breathe out (give). And we have to receive to give"
The lessons that I have learnt on the Journey to support me in receiving have allowed me to let go of the cynicism, the discomfort and remain open.
1. Practicing saying thank you when I receive. No disclaimers, no long talk, no small talk. Thank you and thank you very much.
2. Be happy for the person giving - I feel happy when I give so I channel that feeling to the person who is giving to me.
3. Letting go of judgement, cynicism and conspiracy theories - nuff said. Saying thank you alone helps with this one!
Practice makes a master
Peace
Akosua's Books
Nyabo (Madam) Why Are You Here?
What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love
August 9, 2022
Our Truth is always talking to us
Our truth is always talking to us, but most of us don’t know how to listen. Martha Beck
I truly believe that our lives communicate with us on a regular basis, day in day out we are so loved by life that we are given guidance, truths and signs as we journey on.
Our role is to pay attention, to listen and to act. Sounds simple enough doesn't it? Simple is not always easy. Human beings want to be in control, to have things go our way,. There are times where we find it hard to dig inside for the courage and look only for logic. Tt is a challenge to hear and walk in the truth that life has kindly provided because it does not fit into any logic and it goes contrary to the status quo.
As part of the Journey to embrace our truth, we must be willing to let go.
Let go of the stories.
Let go of the false narratives.
Let go of the guilt.
Let go of the shame.
Let go of the fear.
Let go of the judgement.
Think of your life as a flowing river and the stories, fear, and shame are rocks which prevent the full flow. Remove the rocks and the river flows freely.
Letting go is a process of growing your courage, faith, and intuition, all of which is inside of us.
A process takes time, and the actions must be consistent.
Think of how many times we get an inside message to let go of a job, a relationship, a habit, yet we make excuses, rationales and justification why it does not make sense or fit into our current reality. Life will continue to nudge us until those nudges becomes a full on shove.
Personally, I prefer the gentle nudges, those shoves- my word! sometimes are too hard
Peace
Akosua's Books
Nyabo (Madam) Why Are You Here?
What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love
August 8, 2022
May your actions arise from Self Awareness
May your actions arise not from habit or compulsion, but awareness. Lisa Olivera
How many of us do things unconsciously? Meaning, the action that we take seems to come without thinking, without maximum effort, almost naturally.
We wake up, we pick up our phone, we scroll
or we wake up, we pray
We get out of bed, brush our teeth, take a shower, and go through the day doing activities that come to us.
Now, when these actions are in our best interests we can rest assured that we are in good company however, when our unconscious daily activities does not serve us, this becomes a challenge.
What we do daily becomes our habits and reflects in our lives
Walking daily helps with fitness
Eating fried chicken daily helps with cholesterol
You must be catching my drift by now.
Being self aware can support you in determining what you do consciously or unconsciously . When we find ourselves obsessed with anything, in a type of mindless activity, this is a sure sign that there is room for more self-awareness in our lives.
Changing our habits takes patience, time, discipline and consistency. We must know that there is a habit that require some attention when the action no longer serves us
Stopping compulsive activity also takes a level of willingness and discipline as well - compulsion starts with habits. When they no longer serve us we must become self aware enough to recognise this and take action.
What are the actions in your life that arise from habits and obsession that no longer serve you?
Peace
Akosua's Books
Nyabo (Madam) Why Are You Here?
What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love
August 3, 2022
Letting Go is a Process
When we recognize what is valueless there is no sense of loss in laying it down. ACIM
in the past, letting go sounded to me like falling off a building or a cliff. I would look at letting go as releasing someone's hands and then something catches me at the bottom. For a long time I was in fear of what would happen at the "bottom" I was in even more fear of what happens when I fall or fly off a cliff.
What a difference a change of perspective made, I started looking at letting go as making room, making space, the opening up of a portal for something new, something that will help me live a better life.
I also released the view that someone was holding my hand so there was no more "falling" and no more "bottom" rather, I looked at it from a perspective of flying, when I let go I soared with the wind. I now look at it from the perspective that the Universe always has my back.
Letting go is a process, its starts with our thoughts, what are we thinking, how do we feel about it. Letting go requires faith, courage and discipline and most importantly forgiveness - first of self then of others.
If we are of the view that we are losing something then our actions will reflect that. Who likes to lose? I certainly don't. Life always guides us and redirects us to the path that we ought to be on. Our responsibility is to pay attention and have the courage to let go. To have a vision for ourselves, to have boundaries and a ton of self love.
When I "lost" my job, I did not want to let go because I saw it not as a blessing but as a failure. Now, I see for myself that action made room for me doing so many other activities that I love.
When I "lost" the dream house, I looked at it as I was the victim of the wicked banks. Now I see in that letting go I was able to learn about taking responsibility for the choices that I make and looking at the why behind it all.
We choose to grow by letting go of what is no longer working.
Peace
Akosua's Books
Nyabo (Madam) Why Are You Here?
What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love
Sign up Now - Welcome to Self Awareness - Tools for The Journey
August 1, 2022
August is the Journey to Letting Go
this is what you do when you love and desire to protect yourself. you assess what can be changed, what can be improvised upon and if the answer is nothing. then that’s all you need to know. Gaia
Hello Lovies
Welcome to August - The Journey to Letting Go.
Listen, there are some paths you absolutely must walk for yourself, sometimes you have to get down on your hands and knees in order to climb over the rocks, to navigate the wind, to stay on the ground.
Then there are some paths filled with butterflies, birds and flat open terrain. Life is like that, balanced. When we are willing to view things from this perspective it makes the Journey so much more meaningful.
All that to say, we must invest the time in doing the self work, asking ourselves the probing and sometimes hard questions, taking responsibility for your joy and happiness, being willing to see things differently.
Letting go and giving up are two different concepts.
One is rooted in faith and the other one is rooted in fear.
The Journey to Letting Go will call upon us having a level of unwavering faith that may be unprecedented. however, if we have done the work over the past seven months you may feel willing enough to do something new.
Peace and blessings on the Journey
Akosua's Books
Nyabo (Madam) Why Are You Here?
What Did I Learn Today? Lessons on the Journey to Unconditional Self Love
Sign up Now - Welcome to Self Awareness - Tools for The Journey
July 26, 2022
Relying only external validation is a slippery slope
The minute you stop living to prove is the moment you begin to receive from the Universe
One of the best lessons that I have received on the Journey is "there is nothing to prove"
When I was first introduced to this lesson, I had to question it. How will others know that I am capable, how will they know that I am fit for the purpose, how will I stand out, how will other's know about me?
When I learnt is, focusing on others leaves very little room for me to do my best, focusing on others to the detriment of self plants the seeds for depending on external validation and that is quite a slippery slope. Not everyone will like, approve or be happy for you or with what you are doing.
Proving sends you towards your ego. Your ego wants to be in control, to be right, to compare. This is another slippery slope to being disconnected.
And most importantly, everything starts and ends from within.
The work begins with you believing in yourself, in honoring your self in the way which can lead you to setting boundaries, being kind, authentic and always doing your best.
When this is done consistently, there is nothing to prove because what you do will be evident. Your light will shine brighter and attract everything that you require to do what you need to do. As Paulo Coelho says, all the Universe conspires with you.
Peace
